CA Chapter Thirty-three (Patreon)

Alpha and Tess were both grimy again, but Vexxx was so caked in putrescence that he developed a sort of crust which would crack and fall off as he moved or spoke. A fact which he constantly reminded them of even as he summoned lightning to zap each of the Porkcubes.

“I have a Filthy debuff. I didn’t even know that was, like, a thing, man,” the mage whined as Alpha used yet another sword dipped in ash to slice open a ‘pig’. They’d discovered that Vexxx’s lightning only worked on the inside of the creatures, but by now they had killing the cubes down to a science. Slice. Zap. Slice. Zap. Except Vexxx had fallen behind because he was too busy complaining, and sometimes Tess took a turn with the chopping. Apparently she didn’t carry as many axes around as Alpha did swords, though, probably because axes tended to be less common and more expensive.

“We’ll get cleaned up as soon as we finish,” Alpha said, mainly to shut him up. There was a water trough in the pig pen, and a pond in the pasture, but they were both murky and polluted, and Alpha had a feeling if they tried the pond, they might find gelatinous fish-cubes there. Or would they be fish-sticks? That sounded like an Amythyst joke.

“But I can’t even change until I’m clean,” the boy whimpered, gesturing to the stained underwear that was all he wore under his thick rind. He was in the middle of zapping a Porkcube that was busily dissolving the fence in an attempt to eat him, but he stopped and turned to look at Toggle, gesturing at the snake that lay curled around the gnome’s neck.

“Can’t Orah just,” he made a swirling motion, “whoosh us all clean again?”

Alpha shook her head. “I got a message that Quezal wasn’t happy about that. It’s probably better not to push our luck. Quezal has actually been a pretty good god so far, and I don’t want to tick him off.”

Your Relationship with your Deity, Quezal, has increased by 1.

Alpha read the notification that flashed in front of her eyes, and felt her stomach drop a little at the close call. Amythyst had told her that the gods of Veritas heard every time their names were said aloud, though most of them didn’t actually pay attention, because it happened so often. It made sense, though, that Quezal would keep a close eye - or ear - on his high priestess, and she reminded herself never to say anything bad about Quezal out loud.

At that moment, the fence Vexxx had been leaning on, the same one the Porkcube had been slowly destroying, gave way, and Vexxx tumbled backward into the pig pen. Awkwardly, the boy tried to roll out of the way of the pink cube that leaned toward him, emitting several gleeful snorts. With a shout, Tess used the broad side of her axe like a bat, bunting the grunting monstrosity away, so Vexx landed in the odorous muck of the pen with a splat.

He sat up a moment later, spluttering and furious. “A Stench debuff?” He scrambled out of the mud, lurching toward Tess, who was still standing in the gap created by the broken fence, making sure none of the other cubes escaped. The half-dwarf yelped and jumped away, her face twisted in disgust. She pinched her nose shut.

“What is that?” She pointed at Vexxx with the hand that held her axe. “You stay away from me! You smell like my dad’s tractor after a whole family of rats died in the engine, and then cooked when he turned it on in the spring.”

Alpha turned to look at Vexxx, who now resembled a shambling mud monster, rather than the clean-cut and somewhat finicky mage they were used to. Even from where she stood, several feet away, she could smell the odor wafting from the boy in almost visible waves. She felt her eyes begin to water, and waved her hand in front of her face.

Vexxx’s brown eyes glared out at her from beneath layers of ash, gelatinous cube guts, neutralizing powder, and mud. “This is all your fault!” he accused. “If you’d just use your stupid snake, I would have been able to focus, and these pigs would have been dead half an hour ago.”

Alpha glared back, though she didn’t stop trying to wave the stench away from her nose. “If you would just focus, we’d have been done half an hour ago, and we could have made it back up to the stream to get clean by now. If it’s anybody’s fault that you look like you just fell in a swamp, it’s yours!” She pointed at the Porkcubes, who were practically climbing over each other in an attempt to get out of the pen. “Just kill them so we can go, already!”

The lightning mage put his hands on his hips. “You want them dead?” He spluttered, swiping at some mud that was threatening to slime its way into his mouth. “Fine!” Lifting his hands, he spread his fingers wide and shouted, “Tempest!”

Alpha and Tess exchanged horrified looks, and both dove as far away from the crazy mage as they could. Tempest was a high-tier Area of Effect spell that didn’t differentiate between friend or foe. It would certainly kill any Porkcubes that had already been cut, which was probably all of them, since Vexxx spent more time complaining than zapping. Unfortunately, it would also kill anything else in the area, including them.

Without thinking, Alpha found herself rolling back up onto her feet and running toward Toggle, who was standing near Amy and Myles, who were still serving as the peanut gallery for this little misadventure. Myles had already picked up Amy, and was actually moving with some urgency for once, but Toggle’s short little legs hadn’t taken him outside Tempest’s area when the first lightning bolt cracked down from the clear blue sky, fortunately striking one of the Porkcubes, which squealed loudly. After that, the deafening sound of thunder surrounded them all, with lightning striking anything that moved, and sometimes arcing from one target to the next.

Alpha scooped Toggle up, carrying the gnome beneath her arm like a football as she made for the perimeter of the storm. When she got close enough, she threw Toggle toward a waiting Myles as she dove for the edge. She almost made it. Just as she crossed the invisible line past which no bolts struck, she felt something stab her foot, and she tumbled through the air as if she’d been thrown by an angry giant.

You have lost 111 Drops of Blood to Lightning.

Current Blood supply: 1976/2100

She landed with an explosive grunt as the air was knocked from her lungs, and as she struggled to catch her breath, she reminded herself for the hundredth time that vampires didn’t need to breathe.

You have lost 87 Drops of Blood to Forceful Impact.

Current Blood supply: 1889/2100

You are Dizzy.

Blinking, Alpha stared up at the blue sky, which spun lazily above her. Something dark eclipsed the light, and slowly resolved into the round, bearded face of a complete stranger.

“Uncle George?” she asked, woozily.

A rich, warm belly laugh filled the area as the rumbles and booms of thunder finally began to taper off. A broad, thick-fingered hand extended into her field of vision, and she somehow managed to clasp it, allowing the dwarven player to help her sit up, though she wasn’t ready to stand yet.

“Could be,” the man said, good-naturedly. “But most people call me Wep.” He pointed above his head, where a tag would be if she had player names turned on, and she obediently used [Identify[ on him.

Weapons Shortage - Master Trader. Level 103.

Blood Pack: 14 units

She blinked a little at the number [Blood Pack] gave him. It was unusual for a player to have a number higher than ten, and she vaguely wondered if he’d tell her what his Vitality was, since she had a theory that the amount of Blood was linked to health points.

She heard rustling behind her, and tilted her head to see who was approaching, then groaned as the world spun violently around her. Dizzy had always been one of her least favorite debuffs.

“George,” Myles’ voice said quietly, as he stepped up beside Alpha. She wished she could see his face, because while his voice probably sounded calm to other people, she was sure she caught an edge of pain in it.

Amy didn’t even bother trying to restrain herself, however, and launched herself at the dwarf. Since she  was easily two feet taller than he was, the ungainly stumble which resulted in her practically falling on him should have at least knocked him back a step, but instead he stood stock still as she wrapped her arms around him and started to cry.

“Unc’ George!” the woman sobbed, burying her face in the dwarf’s massive beard.

Wep’s face went completely blank for several seconds, and his brawny arms hung loose at his side. Then, ever so slowly, the genial face twisted into a complex combination of hope, sorrow, and wariness as his arms rose to clasp the wailing woman. Over her shoulder, his shrewd brown eyes passed from Alpha, to Myles, to Toggle, and then to Tess, who came up behind Myles, looking very confused.

At last, as Wep began to pat Amy on the back like a parent soothing a weeping child, his eyes returned to Myles and stayed there. “You and I have some talking to do, I think,” the dwarf said, and Myles nodded, his usually glib tongue seeming to fail him for once.

You are no longer Dizzy.

Alpha, who was feeling uncomfortably out of place sitting on the ground in between the two men, struggled to her feet. Wep’s bushy brown brows rose as he watched her stand, and the dwarf chuckled, looking bemused as Amy finally managed to lift her face from his epic facial hair.

“You’re a long drink of water, aren’t ya?” he asked Alpha, absently adjusting the bandolier of knives and bottles that crossed his barrel chest.

Alpha blinked. “I… don’t know what that means.”

Amy shook her head. “He read a lotta West’rns when ‘e w’s young,” she offered, as she, too, fought to return to an upright position. Myles took a step forward, hand out, but Wep turned slightly to put his body between Myles and Amy, and gently stabilized the woman himself.

Wep’s lips, barely visible in the forest of brown fur that surrounded them, stretched into a grin. “I did that. My father was a Louis L’Amour fan, but I always preferred Zane Grey. I just meant you’re tall.”

Alpha felt her muscles stiffen, but she forced herself to relax. It was clear the man didn’t intend it as an insult, just a statement of fact, and if there was one thing her experience as the innocent and friendly Ava Shaw was teaching her, it was that adults didn’t care about her height nearly as much as the children who had tormented her in elementary and middle school had.

So, she just raised a brow and said, “And you’re short.”

“Four foot four,” he said, proudly, puffing out his broad chest so Amy giggled. “Shortest the game would let me be. And widest.” He patted his belly, grinning, and Alpha found herself laughing, too. If charisma was a stat in Veritas Online, this man’s would be off the charts.

“Uh, guys?” Vexxx’s voice interrupted the moment, and they all turned to look at the mage, who was still standing beside the pig pen, surrounded by chunks of hardened mud and detritus that he’d clearly been busy scraping off his body.

Following the direction of his eyes, Alpha saw that the boy was staring off toward the farmhouse, mouth agape, and it only took a moment for Alpha to see what had caused his look of concern.

The farmer was coming.