Happiest Place 1 (Patreon)

I'm losing track now, but I think @Jonas and I were talking about using geroo to farm brain chemicals, and this popped out.

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Juse woke slowly, his eyelids heavy. “Huh?” he mumbled. “Where am I?”

“Don’t get up,” said a kindly voice. “You’re still shaking off the anesthesia. Wait until you’re fully awake before you try to stand. Would you like something to drink?”

“Uh, something sweet would be nice,” said Juse.

“I’ll grab you a soda, hon,” said a feminine voice. “Be back in just a moment.”

Juse tried opening his eyes a second time. It looked like he was in a med bay of some sort, but the walls were painted a cheerful green instead of the usual sterile white. “Wait, anesthesia? Did I get hurt? Am I going to be okay?”

“You’re just fine,” reassured the smiling geroo beside him. “It was just a routine procedure. Nothing to worry about.”

“Well, that’s a relief,” said Juse, closing his eyes again. “Where am I?”

“You’re in the happiest place in the galaxy.”

A statement that odd was enough to make him open his eyes once more. He remembered getting his assignment to leave the breeding colony, and they gave him some sort of injection, but they’d said it was a vitamin mix to boost his immune system, not a sedative. “The happiest place, huh?” he asked. “Where’s that?”

The medic smiled wide and handed him a cold glass that the female geroo had just returned with. “The happiness lab, of course.”

Juse sat up carefully and sipped at the soda. “A happiness lab? What in grandfather’s name is that?”

“First things first. I’m Ok’iu, one of the medical technicians here at the happiness lab. That’s Niski,” said the male as he gestured to the gal. “It’s our job to make sure everyone stays in tip-top physical condition so there’ll be no medical reason for you to be anything but the happiest you can be.”

“Uh, nice to meet you. I’m Juse.” He took a larger drink, then set the soda aside. More urgently now, “So … happiness lab?”

“Have you ever had any medical or scientific training?” asked Ok’iu. When Juse shook his head, the technician explained, “Well, the glands in your body synthesize a bunch of really complex chemicals. Depending on your mood, these glands will dump different combinations of molecules into your bloodstream.”

Juse looked back and forth between the two smiling faces, but only managed, “Uh huh?”

“So, like when you fall in love, your glands will pump out dozens of different chemicals,” explained Niski. “One will make your heart race. One will make you want to smile. Others will make you feel good.”

“These are some strange, complicated molecules that are tricky to synthesize in a lab,” said Ok’iu, “and it’s much simpler to just produce them naturally and then extract them from your blood.”

Juse began to frown, his ears drooping, but the other two were quick to touch his ears, encouraging him to lift them back into a smile. Their gentle touches lingered on his skin. It felt … quite pleasant. Juse cleared his throat. “So, you’re gonna what? Expose me to things that would have made me feel happy, then steal away these chemicals before I can enjoy them?”

“Yes and no,” said Niski with an easy smile. “You are going to be exposed to things that will make you happy, and we did install a sort of pump that will extract them from your blood, but you’ll still feel happy.”

“Right,” said Ok’iu. “It’s more like the pump will drain the chemicals away when your body is finished with them, rather than just letting them go to waste. But your job is just to be happy so the pump can fill up a teeny tiny reservoir that’s been implanted inside your chest.” He touched a small bandage that was stuck below Juse’s sternum.

“And when the reservoir is full?” he asked. “Then what?”

“Then we drain them out and send them off for processing,” Ok’iu explained.

“It doesn’t hurt,” added Niski. “Then, you can go back to doing things that make you happy to fill up that reservoir once more.”

Juse’s ears frowned once more, and once again, the two lab techs touched his ears. “So, the krakun are using me to generate these happiness molecules? That’s horrible!”

“Everyone always feels that way when they first arrive,” said Niski. She pushed aside a little fur below her sternum to expose a faint scar. “I know I did, but in time, you’ll realize you’re just being silly.”

“Right,” said Ok’iu. “You’ll realize that your new job is to be happy. Sort of like if you were a farmer, the krakun would be using you to make food. But it’s just a job, and as jobs go, this one is so much easier than farming.”

“And if I feel sad? What then?”

“We all have our off-days,” said Niski. “That’s normal. And if you’re feeling blue, the others here will try to cheer you up.”

“Sure, but remember, we all have our own work to do,” added Ok’iu. “I hesitate to say ‘happiness quotas’, but at the end of the day, we’re all responsible for doing our own work.”

More frowns, more ear touching. “And if I can’t fill my quota? If I’m not happy enough or I get depressed?”

“That would be no different than in any other job,” said Niski. “Like a farmer who couldn’t farm. You’d get fired, transferred off to some other sort of work, I suppose. They certainly won’t let you hang around here if you’re not being productive.”

“But you don’t want that!” said Ok’iu. “This is the best job in the galaxy—pretty much by definition.”

“All right. I’ll give it a try,” said Juse. “Sounds pretty easy, at least.”

“It is,” said Ok’iu. “Come back in three days to get those stitches out, and try not to get them wet in the meantime. Sponge bath if you need to, but don’t submerge yourself.”

“Right,” said Niski. “Stay off the waterslide!”

Juse’s eyes opened wide. “The … what?” he gasped.

“The waterslide!” Niski repeated with glee on her ears. “It’s this big, smooth chute that starts way up at the top of the habitat, and it twists and turns until it gets down to the bottom in a big splash pool.”

“They’re constantly pumping water down it, which makes it really slippery,” said Ok’iu. “You go up to the top and sit down and zoom!”

The two medics waved their arms in the air and squealed like little cubs, “Ah! Splash!”

“It’s a lot of fun,” said Niski. “You’ve gotta try it.”

“But not until the stitches are removed,” said Ok’iu, wagging a finger in warning.

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Reviewer's link: https://docs.google.com/document/d/15PoxPL2QnMIr_9i3WKfz8V7yy6LuSOrWNreyHoRW5i8/edit?usp=sharing

Thoughts?