LoveDroid (Part 1?) (Patreon)

You lifted open the latches on the brushed steel case with feverish anticipation. They'd been on backorder for months and it seemed like a lifetime since you'd placed your order. But the day had finally come. 

As you lifted the final latch on the refrigerator-sized case, a metallic hiss sounded and the door opened on its own. Out of the box stepped a plain, featureless, almost skeletal android. This form didn't exist for long however, as a flash of light filled the room as the android assumed a different visage; a beautiful blonde woman wearing a little black dress. 

"Hello, master.  Welcome to your new LoveDroid, Model D-3200." She spoke in a plain, customer-service voice."My name is Simone, the default LoveDroid personality, and I am here to provide for your every intimate desire.  Would you like to begin the initial setup, master?" 

"Yes please!" You answer eagerly. Oh, this was gonna be good.

"Excellent. First things first, what should I call you?"

You thought. It was hot that the first way she greeted you was "master."

"Master will do." You ordered.

"Excellent, thank you, Master. Feel free to select a preset appearance, or customize one of your own." A holographic viewscreen appeared in thin air about a foot in front of her chest. On it was simply two options, "Preset" and "Custom." Wanting to get right to the action, you chose the former for now. 

The screen changed to a grid display, featuring a catalog of images of various women, all stunningly attractive, of course. You browsed the options. You settled on one titled "Barbara." A voluptuous, ginger woman materialized in the space where Simone had just been and spun around in place. Her hips were wide, her legs silky smooth. However, she could be a little more 'plush."

"I am Barbara. Is this appearance to your liking, Master?" 

"Uh..." You began. "Is there a way to... fine-tune your appearance?"

"Customization options are always available!" She replied, as an array of sliders filled the screen, like a character-creator in a video game. There were options for hairstyle, hair length, color, everything you could imagine. But there were one or two sliders, in particular, you were looking for...

You flicked through menus until you found them, near each other, conveniently. "Breast size" and "Butt size." With one finger, you slid the breast slider up, slowly. You looked back up at her to appraise. Her chest expanded accordingly, from modest orange-sized breasts to something more akin to watermelons. That was perfect.

As you pressed your finger to the ass slider, she automatically turned herself around. What intuitive software. Similarly, you raised the slider up to humongous proportions, to where it looked like she was smuggling a couple basketballs in her underwear. Satisfied, for now, you closed the menu. 

"Is this satisfactory, Master?" She asked, more eagerly than before. 

You eyed her up "Oh yes, you certainly are..."

"If your customization is complete, then might I suggest we begin calibration?" Barbara offered.

"Calibration?" you ask.

"Yes. We will make love for the first time and I shall calibrate additional settings to your liking." She clarified. "Shall we begin?"

You nodded with excitement. 

"Excellent, please present your genitalia." She instructed. Of course, you eagerly drop your pants to present what you had to offer. Barbara knelt down quickly. 

"Please insert your penis into my mouth. I will fellate it until you are at full erection. Then, you will insert it into my vagina to calibrate it for maximum stimulation." She explained, stepping forward on her knees and opening wide enough for you to put it in.

You wasted no time in putting your flaccid cock in the sexbot's eager mouth. She immediately put her lips around it and sucked. Hard. Her mouth was warm, soft, and wet, it felt exactly like a real woman's. You stood no chance and became as stiff as you could possibly get in a matter of seconds. Sensing this, Barbara pulled off. 

"Is this peak hardness, Master?" Again, you simply nodded. Barbara flipped over onto all-fours with a feat of swift athleticism. She then spread her legs slightly, presenting you with perhaps the most gorgeous, perfect porn star pussy you'd ever seen.

"Please insert yourself into me when ready." 

You didn't need to be told twice. You forced the tip of your boner into those perfect, beautiful lips. It felt like warm, slippery heaven. But Barbara didn't react. She remained still, a faint mechanical whirring sounding inside her. It paused for a moment, then resumed. Then again. After the fourth time, she finally spoke up.

"Master, are you sure you are properly inserted?" She asked. 

"I sure am!" You replied. 

"I am unable to verify your penis' presence." She explained. "None of my sensors can detect an inserted object." 

"Wh-what?" You demand. 

"This can sometimes happen for cases where the user's penis does not conform to minimum size standards." She explained. You feel a flush of embarrassment. Not even robot pussy was going to take your tiny cock. 

"Fear not though, Master!" She continued. "I have automatically initiated a service request via your public twitter account for an upgrade kit that provides me with the newly-developed UltraTite VX, a miniature simulated vagina for the minimally-endowed man." She explained with cheer in her voice. 

Your blood ran cold. Your public twitter meant that everyone would see you ordering sex parts for tiny dicks!  Frantically you reached for your phone to delete the tweet.

"I'm sorry, master. But deleting the tweet will prevent you from receiving service." Barbara added, already sensing what you were doing. 

"If you don't want the upgrade kit, that's fine, but keep in mind that my vagina will be unusable to you. And I'm afraid that all LoveDroid products are not refundable."

So, you stand there. Realizing your choices are to tell the entire world about your sub-par genitalia, or be stuck with a useless sex doll you paid a fortune for. You sigh and debate what to do next...