Bard of the Wild (Chapter 17) (Patreon)

"What- What-" Linkle stutters. "How do we get her out of there?! How did she even get like this to begin with?!"

"I don't know... If I had to make an educated guess, the tree above was a great deku tree and during its last moments of life, it sealed this girl away to prevent her from dying to this... poison? She was bitten by something, clearly.

"Can your healing magic do anything?" Linkle questions.

"I'm unsure. Poison is tough work. If I had like... a little bit more power, then it might be possible, but I sort of doubt it as I am right now." I continue.

"Regardless. We need to move on. Clear out this divine beast-" I gesture to the archway leading deeper inside the metal wall. "Then return with Purah after the poison mist has dissipated. We shouldn't dawdle."

We walk forwards deep into the metallic structure.

Vines and roots seem to line the walls.

*Shiiiin*

Our weapons begin to glow a dull light- which is actually quite worrying- as we step deeper and deeper inside the beast.

Eventually we come to a large room, plant life and vines cross the insides of this mechanical beast, my eyes slowly skim the walls.

"Something relating to the calamity is here..." Linkle frowns.

"Duh. I know our swords glow in the presence of evil, Linkle." I snort as my eyes lock onto a small raised platform in the middle of the room. "Oi. What's that?"

"It..." The girl slowly walks forwards. "It looks like a port for a Sheikah slate?"

The girl slowly pulls the device off her hip and after a little cutting the plant life covering it, inserts her sheikah slate into the panel.

It flips over and glows briefly, projecting a three dimensional model from the large eye on the back of the slate.

It...

It appears to be a model of the Divine Beast.

It is a giant spider-like beast with six legs, from what I can see there are quite a few little red spots on the model, spots that quickly expand, a little text box at the side quickly opening up.

"Superficial Damage, rotaries damaged, degraded armoring..." I list quietly. "Weapons system inoperable. Core, relatively undamaged... sitting at eighty six percent structural integrity."

This thing has chainsaw front limbs?!

Well, I mean, I guess we know what cut down that deku tree outside...

I look to a spot on the larger back section of the insect mecha.

"Mist production... Twelve percent efficiency."

"The entirety of the lost woods is only twelve percent?!"

"Well, to be fair, it has been running for, what, ten thousand years?" I shoot back.

A Quest Objective has been completed!

'hn?'

Relics of the past:
The guardians and the divine beasts were not originally created in this time. They were lost to time Millinia ago. Technology from long past originally used to seal Calamity Ganon for thousands upon thousands of years.

Objectives:
Find Divine Beast #11 Vah Marak: [x]

Rewards:
Quest Objective 7: 12000 Experience, one item worth up to 10,000 Gold Pieces.

"Divine Beast number eleven... Vah Marak." I hum, glancing around.

"Vah Marak?" Linkle echoes.

"Maraknid." I hum, causing the blonde to shoot me a half-lidded utterly disappointed glare.

"You didn't think of that one, did ya bitch." I taunt.

She rolls her eyes. "Yes yes, you got me good that time. Is Marak it's real name?"

"Yep." I nod once.

"Weird... I wonder how these things got their names?"

"If it had to take a wild guess, I'd say they were named after people." I shrug idly as I look around.

"Weird. But whatever." She notes as she takes her slate out of the port. "If I were a betting girl, I'd say that we need to go and get to these three remaining nodes. One towards the front, one... above us somewhere and a third at the base of whatever the big butt part of a spider is called."

"Thorax?" I suggest.

"I don't know, dude. But that sounds right." She shrugs.

"The thorax is the centermost part of an insect. Much like your chest and ribs would be considered a thorax. The word you are looking for is Abdomen." Vivi supplies, glowing with each word.

"Egh. That sounds weird." I scoff. "Thank you, Vivi."

A quest has been received:

Cleanse Vah Marak:
For thousands of years it has lain dormant, a vile curse has infested these halls. Now it comes to you to remove this taint that has caused so much pain.

Objective:
Explore Vah Marak: [ ]
???: [ ]

"How is it weird?" The sword questions.

"Well, I mean, we've got all these words for things. Thorax, mandibles, paws, talons, fangs, tails, beaks, you'd think we'd have a word that is unique for describing something that a large majority of insects hav-"

There's a flash of moment in the corner of my vision.

"GET BACK!" I shout as I wrap my arms around Linkle's midsection and leap backwards.

*CLANG*

A massive set of jaws slam shut around the spot the girl was standing moments before. The creature's head is large and round, with a vine neck that coils and seems to disappear into the darkness of a nearby hallway.

We both get ready, raising our weapons as we cautiously gaze at the enemy before us...

All I can think at the moment is... "So, who let the chain-chomp off the leash?"

"Hah?" Linkle mutters, eyes glancing towards me.

"Oh. You wouldn't get that reference. Just know whatever I just said was very funny." I smirk lazily.

"I get it." My sword supplies.

Wait...

Was my body's 'past world' some sort of modern Zelda? With like, game systems and stuff? That's fucking weird. But I guess that does explain why Vivi here wasn't confused by Purah's gun and car-

Linkle and I dive to the sides as the large orb-like head lunges forwards, jaws snapping closed around where we were just seconds before.

My blade flashes out only for my eyes to widen, my arm is jarred by my attack. A little damage slips through, but certainly not the clean cut through a vine like I was expecting.

"Holy fuck! It's like hitting a wall of iron!" I shout out as the plant whips around, teeth gnashing.

I dart to the side as Linkle does, her Sheikah slate coming to her hand.

"Like Iron, huh?" She shouts as she swings her hand forwards

A beam shoots from the sheikah slate.

It strikes the large Venus flytrap-like plant... and does nothing.

"SHIT." She curses, being forced to dive to the side to avoid the next attack of the big angry plant monster. "I thought Magnesis would work! It's all grey and stuff!"

"Just shove a bomb in its mouth or something" I call out as I narrowly leap over the entire head of the plant as it swings around like a wrecking ball, not trying to bite me this time, but trying to use its body like an oversized flail.

"That was my next idea! Get off my back!" She calls back as with another swing of her sheikah slate, a large circular glowing bomb appears in her hand.

The plant's maw opens wide as it turns to her, she hurls the bomb forwards, the large plant consuming the orb without issue.

She then quickly sprints away as fast as she can, avoiding the charge of her enemy as it slams into the metal wall.

She pushes a button on her sheikah slate causing the plant to abruptly jerk and shake, its skin rapidly gains color, going from a deep metallic grey to a light green.

I blink slowly, then cast a spell.

My feet become just a blur as I lunge forwards, Linkle, being connected to me, does the same, magical power flooding our bodies.

My weapon lashes out just as Linkle slashes with the master sword. Our attacks seem to find purchase this time, carving deep swathes of green into the plant's flesh.

Linkle is stood right behind me as I crouch, ducking under her swing.

I stand up, slashing upwards as she takes a single step to the side with a small spin and follows my attack with an upwards diagonal slash.

The plant before us screams, stem growing taught and quickly retracting back from where it came.

From the sheer speed it is being pulled away, it overshoots its exit, slamming its wounded side on a nearby door and leaving a large green splatter as it disappears into the darkness.

We both breathe heavily, cautiously gazing down the hallway the plant disappeared down.

"Well. Fuck." I curse blandly, hand coming to my chest. "That scared the shit out of me."

"Mn." The girl mutely agrees with a sole nod.

My eyes flick to my quest, revealing a little aspect of it has changed.

Objective:
Explore Vah Marak: [ ]
Slay the Diahandla: [ ]

"Diahandla, huh?" I mutter.

"Bless you." Linkle deadpans.

"Huh?"

"Oh. That wasn't a sneeze?" She questions.

"Fuck you, Linkle."

"Fuck me yourself, Aurum." The girl grins mischievously.

"Well, after we kill the demon plant, maybe I will... oh, also get out of this probably poisonous mist." I continue gesturing around us. "Oh. Third thing. Next time remind me to cast haste. I could have probably made that much easier for us, but I sort of forgot in all the chaos."

"Aurum..." Linkle sighs, giving me a disappointed look.

"What? I'm sorry. It sort of surprised me, there. I wasn't expecting doom plant to show up." I shrug. "Ugh, now we'll likely be stalked by that motherfucker throughout this entire divine beast."

"So, be on my guard?" Linkle questions.

"Yep." I nod. "Maybe have a bomb in hand so you can toss it into its jaws if it tries to eat you."

"Hm... I'd need to put down my sword for that, but I could definitely see the benefit of that." She agrees.

She sheathes her sword, and with a dull flash a large bomb- bigger than her head- appears balanced in one hand.

I offer her a slow nod as I look to the place the plant disappeared. "Well, let's do this."

I slowly walk forwards, holding out my sword to give a bit more clarity to the world in addition to the black and white I see far beyond the immediate area around me.

Green blood- or some form of sap- is smeared on the floor from our foes tremendous wounds.

I pause, gazing at the walls, floor and ceiling of the hallway.

"Hn..."

I slowly and carefully walk forwards, giving a cautious glare to a bunch of little mounds upon the side of the wall.

A little sphere shoots from the wall revealing a toothed flower attached to its roots with a thin stem, it is purple in color, toothed maw snapping together repeatedly, creating a sound similar to the noise of two coconuts colliding.

I slash once, severing it from the wall, then as it writhes on the floor I take a single step and stab it through the bulb. This action seeming to be the one to kill it.

"So, we have to deal with a bunch of mini-plants as well?" Linkle sighs as we both look up.

"Seems that way." I echo mutely, gazing at numerous pods lining the walls, ceilings and floors.

"Should I just hurl the bomb?" She questions, causing me to tilt my head.

"Sure. Go ahead." I shrug as I take a few steps back. "Or do you want me?"

She hands over the bomb. "You've got big muscles. Be more than just my eye candy."

"Fine, fine." I sigh dramatically. "It appears that I will be forced to unleash my real power and- wait. We're being poisoned. No fucking around."

"If you don't throw it before I get bored I'm just going to push the button and see what happens to us." The girl glares.

"HAH!" Shout as I hurl it down the hallway.

It goes a surprising distance, but before it hits the ground, there's a near blinding flash of blue that seems to expand across the entire hallway.

Much to our joy, the vines lining every surface and the little pods here and there were all vaporized.

"I'd be careful around those things." I mutter suddenly as a cube shaped bomb appears in her hand.

"Yeah." She agrees. "It looks about the right size for the bite that girl in the amber had. It'll probably be poisonous."

"Venomous."

"Don't care. Didn't ask." She shoots back instantly.

"Ouch. My feelings." I smirk. "You're acting like a brat. Remember what I did to Purah when she was acting like one?'

There's a small flush to her face, the corners of her lips turning upwards.

"Let's pick up the pace, yeah?" I hum, propping Vivi on my shoulders.

She offers me a sole nod.

We begin running forwards, following the greenish blood left on the floor, any Deku Babas that pop out of the wall are cut down by my sword.

Eventually we come to a new room, about the same size as the first, instead of only having one possible path, however, the room is like a T, with a doorway to the left and right-

And... in the ceiling apparently.

"Let's cover the lower floor first." I frown, glancing down at the floor, eyes following the green sap as it trails to the center of the room and abruptly disappears. "The plant went up to the next floor."

We turn right, stepping into a new room.

My eyes scan the surroundings.

Metal boxes littered with vines seem to line the floor and halls.

"Storage?" Linkle questions.

"It appears to be." I agree, giving the room one final inquisitive look.

"We'll check back later with Purah."

"Sure." Linkle shrugs. "I- hang on..."

She walks over to one of the boxes and opens it. "This looks..."

I peer over her shoulder.

"Oh?"

Sparkshot
A unique brand of Sheikah technology that has been forgotten to time, capable of attuning to any Sheikah Slate and through ancient technology, allows the wielder to shoot a bolt of condensed and incredibly sticky hook-like energy that clings to targets. Said energy is connected back to the Sparkshot, allowing the wielder to pull whatever is struck towards them or vice versa.
Note: the connection between Sparkshot and the 'hook' deals 2d6 Electricity damage to whatever is making contact with it.

"A grappling hook?" I hum with an intrigued blink. "Alright, put that on. It could be useful.

"How do I use it?" She questions.

"uhhhhh." I begin. "No clue."

She slips on the piece of technology like a gauntlet, looking over it with a small smirk. "It looks pretty cool, whatever it is."

She points it at the wall.

*CHHZT*

A blast of energy shoots from near the wrist, lancing towards the wall where it lands with a loud thud.

A beam of electricity seems to crackle between the gauntlet and the wall.

Linkle pulls back slightly, the crackling intensifying.

"This is pretty tough." She grunts slightly.

The electricity whines and whirrs as she is pulled off her feet, faceplanting against the floor.

"Pfft-"

"Laugh and I'll kick you." The girl growls as she gets to her feet shooting me an embarrassed glare.

She shakes her arm. "How the hell do I use this?!"

She falls again as she pushes a button, the connection she was pulling against abruptly snapping.

She stands up, looking at the gauntlet on her arm. "Alright, I think I've got it now."

"Do you?" I question.

"I should." She nods.

"Alright."

We return to the crossroads, continuing to carefully walk- as we don't know if that plant will drop down upon us- forwards to the side we didn't check.

Its a long weaving hallway, one that we make it through in reasonable time, our jog only barely being hampered by the deku babas that sprout from the little pods in the walls.

After a few minutes we finally make it to a large room, the floor absolutely covered in little bulbs. Towards the center is a much larger one, and beyond the sea of what I can only assume to be Deku babas... is another panel to insert the sheikah slate.

"Welp." The girl sighs, turning to me as a bomb appears in her hand. "Throw."

"Gotcha." I give the bomb an underhanded toss, causing it to roll forwards across the uneven ground like a bowling ball, bounding and bouncing over roots as large plants begin to sprout from underneath.

A large majority are instantly vaporized as Linkle pushes a button on her Sheikah Slate. She hands me a cube-shaped bomb next.

This one is hurled but covers less distance, rolling over its sharp corners briefly before falling static.

A massive deku baba shoots from the largest pod in the middle of the room, its jaws clap together menacingly.

This giant plant isn't exactly the size of the one we fought earlier, but it is definitely respectable.

A regular deku baba could probably fit my whole fist in their mouth, but that's about it, this one could likely fit our entire upper torso in its maw.

But the one from earlier could have easily eaten both of us at the same time.

It looks down at the glowing cube that has stopped just in front of it... then eats it.

*SPLAT*

Its head explodes, causing dozens of other smaller plants to shriek as they pop out of the floor and walls. They writhe like a wall of tendrils, letting out pained shrieks and screams as they slowly twist and coil, they seem to be rapidly drying out and decaying.

They fall from the walls as they begin turning to dust, the room is utterly cleared of plant life.

"Huh..." I mutter.

Miniboss defeated! Huzzah! Truly a battle for the ages!

We slowly walk forwards, cautiously glancing around, looking for any potential holes in the wall or ceiling a giant plant could leap out of.

Seeing that there aren't any, we allow our guard to lower slightly, we step forwards and insert the Sheikah Slate into the panel.

"Two down."

"Yep." I nod once. "Now we just need to go up."

We turn and quickly rush back to the original crossroads, gazing upwards to the hole in the ceiling.

"Well, shall we?"

"How are we getting up there?" Linkle questions, looking over to me.

"I was under the assumption you'd use your new grappling hook." I note.

"Ah... right." She sighs. "That'll probably be pretty dangerous, though."

"Take the master sword and hold it out like this." I point my arm to the side, sword extended, the flats of my blade facing the ceiling and floor. "I'll get a running jump, then leap up there and if anything is waiting for us, I'll distract it long enough for you to show up."

"Alright... be careful." The girl sighs as she points her arm upwards.

With a small jolt, the sparkshot shoots upwards, hook connecting to the roof above. Her gaze strays to me, then with a sole nod she draws her sword and begins to be lifted upwards.

As she reaches about half way, I rush towards the wall, running up it briefly, my legs tense and with a powerful leap, I jump towards her, my foot touches the side of her sword, then with another leap I am catapulted straight up into the next room.

I hang in the air for a brief moment, taking in my surroundings, a crackling beam of electricity just behind me.

The large chain chomp looking motherfucker is there, skin darkened to an iron-like quality yet again.

With a snap of my finger a bolt of electricity arcs from the ceiling into the plant beast.

It squirms briefly, letting out a small scream as it regains its greenish color... then two more hit it.

"SKUUUAAAAAAAH!"

I clutch my ears as the plant is pulled back, shooting down the hallway into the darkness.

That-

That wasn't mr chomp that screamed...

Linkle finally pulls herself into view, allowing me to grab her wrist and pull her onto solid ground as the sparkshot disconnects.

Her eyes scan our surroundings as she tightly grips the master sword. "What the hell was that?"

"So." I begin. "Good new and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?"

She stares into my eyes for a long moment- or I assume she does due to the mask of Truth.

"Good?'

"Electricity cuts through the plant's shell." I announce.

"And the bad?"

"It didn't scream. That was something else... something it was connected to." I inform.

"Fuuuuuck." She sighs as she turns to the sole door in front of us. "Well, let's get this over with."

We walk forwards, our swords flashing out every now and then to cleave plants in twain as they get in our path.

"Man. Purah's going to love this place." I note as I slash away at another Deku Baba, severing its bulb from the wall.

Linkle catches the bulb on her upswing, cutting it in half and leaving it dead without a doubt. "If we are able to get rid of this poisonous smoke, at least."

"True." I relent with a slow nod. "I'm honestly starting to get a little bit of a headache."

"Me too." She agrees. "Come on. Let's pick up the pace."

We eventually come to a large room of spinning gears, on the other side, I can see another control panel, but it is locked behind a metallic gate.

Large spires, looking similar to tesla coils line the sides of the room, each overgrown with plant life.

"How much you want to bet that door opens when we shock all those coils?" I question, causing the girl to shrug.

"it's our best plan at the moment." She relents as I reach into my bag and bring out Sheik's harp, the Hyrule Aria.

I pluck a few strings on it, a smile on my face as bolts of lightning strike down from above.

Call lightning might sound like it needs to be used outside, but, that's merely if you want to combine it with the weather. Otherwise, it's perfectly able to be used underground or indoors.

Strokes of lightning crash down upon the pillars, burning away the clinging plantlife as they begin to glow and vibrate with a dull hum.

Arcs of electricity seem to radiate across the eight pillars, arcing out to the surrounding floor and burning away even more of the plants. Hidden Deku babas shrieking in pain as they are killed before they can really even do much.

The ground seems to vibrate lightly as the lines of electricity seem to link up on both sides, like two strings passed through four sewing needles in a line, the ends going into the floor and ceiling respectively.

I watch Linkle take a step back, carve a little piece of root off a nearby wall and hurl it forwards.

Seeing as it doesn't get vaporized... it looks like we are good to cross.

We quickly make our way to the other side and Linkle places her Sheikah Slate within the port.

This was definitely a puzzle that should have been completed with the spark shot, but I was able to cheat by spending three bardic inspiration.

I've still got like... thirty in my back pocket.

That's ninety bolts of lightning. More than enough to utterly decimate a small army of enemies.

After a brief moment Linkle offers me a nod, taking the sheikah slate from the panel and turning towards the remaining door.

We walk forwards, cautious frowns on our face.

Whatever made that hellish noise... is likely on the other side of this hallway.

We enter another room, and just from a cursory glance, it SCREAMS 'boss room'.

Large, open, well-lit from numerous little dim spotlights in the roof, and most importantly flooded.

From where we are standing there's a small platform with what appears to be stairs to the west and to the east, but they trail down into sickly purple water.

On the other side of the room, I can see another platform, then there's two more on the left and right sides of the room with a bunch of little platforms- or rather pistons, pipes, and other assorted Sheikah garbage poking out of the poisoned water.

However, the thing that truly grabs my attention at the moment is the absolutely massive plant far larger than even Mr. Chomp that Linkle and I carved some pieces out of in the first room of this divine beast.

It towers above us, its stem thick and armored with large thorned leaves like you might see on a dragon fruit, a large three lobed bulb slowly opens, fanning out and revealing rows upon rows of teeth.

At the center of the mouth... is a large eye loosely connected to the plant-like body through viscous blackish purple liquid.

"Malice?!" The blonde beside me gasps only to stiffen as the poison goop below begins to bubble.

Eight heads rise from the sludge... eight heads identical to the one we fought off earlier.

So...

That makes this Flowerblight Ganon, huh?

I watch the greenish scales on the fat body of the centermost plant turn a deep steel grey.

At its base, tangled within thick roots is the last remaining sheikah slate port we were looking for.

Clearly, it must die if we want to reclaim the divine beast from it...

This bodes poorly.