Santa Help-out Part 6 (Jeanne Dragon/Gryphon Tg) (Patreon)

Jalira: Hello again, genie Jalira coming in from the Nagisa’s wish opportunity journalist service, welcome to the show. As you all probably know, Santa himself has recently reached out to Nagisa Fulkami, our friendly neighborhood goddess of darkness, and asked her for her very special kind of support. And that definitely means that we will see a lot more sexy monster girls around Santa's workshop in the near future.

Today I have a very special guest with me to interview who had been chosen by Nagisa’s whims to help out Santa this Christmas. Please, introduce yourself~

Jeanne: See, I would love to do that, but… uhm…

…Help?

Jalira: It might be none of my business, but I just got to know… how did you get stuck in the ceiling fan?

Jeanne: You know, I would also like to know that. Could you untangle my tails from the fan. I don’t mind introducing myself in the meantime.

Jalira: Oh, sure thing. Give me a sec, I'll float up to you.

Jeanne: Thank you very much. Alright, well… name is Jeanne and I am Santa’s personal and private toy tester dragon, gryphon hybrid. With two feathered wings, two scared wings and two tails, one scaled and one not, there are no heights I can not reach… and no crevices I cant get stuck in apparently… Thank you.

Jalira: No problem. Yeah, I can see that there is quite a lot going on on your back. Does this sort of thing happen often?

Jeanne: Everyday and always in another place. I know it should kinda help with finding the weak points and dangers of new toys, but sometimes I just think that this dark goddess just laughs in her high and mighty throne in heaven while I find a way to get stuck in a Switch docking station…

This might sound like a joke, but it really is not. I have gone through everything already. From TVs, to Switches, to plastic figurines, to ceiling fans… I have managed to either get stuck in or have them get stuck on me for practically everything I have ever come across since I have been turned into this form.

Jalira: That is quite something and… uhm… I think there is something hanging in your wing. It looks like…

Jeanne: Ignore it.

Jalira: But…

Jeanne: Ignore it.

Jalira: Alright then. I have prepared a few questions for you that our watchers are certainly eager to hear the answers to. Would you be okay with answering them for me?

Jeanne: Yup. I am ready. Although I would like to not speak about my body too much if at all possible.

Jalira: Oh boy, then you are going to love this first question. As you know, you have been chosen to help out Santa this Christmas. What sort of role did you receive, what sort of body did you receive and how does your new body help you with your job?

Jeanne: That didn’t last long, but oh well. No point trying to hide it. Not that I even can to be honest…

Alright, so as you can see, I have been tasked with the quality check and tests of all toys that are to be shipped to the children all over the world to make sure no one's Christmas gets ruined by faulty products. And like I said I have been transformed into a dragon, gryphon hybrid, so I have both scaled and feathered tails and wings.

But I guess most importantly I have gained a very very childlike attitude when it comes to toys. Like I know I shouldn’t have that much fun with them, but I just kinda lose myself when I play with them. Which is kinda a good thing, because if the toys survive my play sessions, they'll survive the kids too.

Any questions?

Jalira: Yeah, so how exactly does that work? Do you just unpack all presents and play with them?

Jeanne: No, that would be horrible. Then no kid would receive a “fresh out of the box” present and we can't have that. I actually have a magical spell for that which took me a while to get used to. It’s called toy cloning, and it allows me to create a temporary completely identical object to one that I see, like toys.

These items hold out for exactly one hour and four minutes, before disappearing back into thin air. Which honestly is a good thing…

Jalira: How so? Wouldn't it be much more in your interest to create permanent copies…? Wouldn't that save a lot of money on Santa’s behalf?

Jeanne: One would think so at first glance, but there are several reasons why that just wouldn't work. As a genie you probably know how much magical power it takes to fulfill a wish, right? Creating a real copy of a toy requires about as much energy as a regular wish, and while 3-4 of them would surely be okay, making millions upon millions of them is simply not realistic.

And another reason is that I am not sure if I could even work if they were permanent…

Jalira: You couldn’t work?

Jeanne: So I might sound mature and all right now, but Nagisa made sure to awaken my inner child, whenever I get to play with anything. The upside of that is that I have more fun then than I ever had in my entire life. It’s like permanent Christmas from the perspective of a 10 year old.

…and then I end up stuck in weird places when the toys finally disappear again. Just imagine if they didn't disappear…

Jalira: Ah. So you go with the instinctive approach. That's really cool actually. Okay, next question. Why and how did Nagisa recruit you?

Jeanne: One word. One name. Alex.

Jalira: Huh? The snowworm girl?

Jeanne: Is that what she turned into? I haven’t really heard from anyone since I have been stationed down here. Or… well… My new childlike instinct makes it hard to pay attention to things. I just see a bunch of monster girls at the gatherings and have been more focused on the food to be honest. And to think it would all start on a movie night of all days…

Yeah, I was on the street with Alex, planning to watch a movie, when the lady in black appeared. She said something about helping Santa and urged us to go into the portal. Alex was eager, but I held her back… only to get shoved by Nagisa and fly through the thing anyway.

And after that, I became a plaything for that dark goddess. She pulled on my wings to create them out of thin air, made me gain tails, massaged my ears to make them like this and just played with my body some more until I became what you see now.

But then she pressed a present box into my arms and told me to use magic on it. That distracted me for just long enough for Nagisa to touch my head. And then I blanked out. When I came too I was in this room, stuck headover in that present box over there. I felt like an important conversation had happened while I was out, but I don’t really know all the details.

Jalira: That sounds… rough. Have you had a chance to talk to Santa yet?

Jeanne: Ah, don’t worry. I have talked to him a bunch. I remember important conversations deep down, I just tend to forget them in the moment.

Jalira: If you say so. Alright, on to the next question. How does a typical day of yours look like?

Jeanne: You mean on a work day? Well, when I get here in the toy test lab, I usually do the same thing over and over again until the day is over. Create a copy of a toy or plaything that I haven't tried before, lose myself to my inner child, wake up after an hour, hope I didn't get stuck somewhere weird, call Miriam, my elvish assistant if I did to help me get out, and then spend like 30 minutes filing a report on my play experience. And then I'll repeat this 1,5 hour loop for like 5 to 6 times. Until it's evening.

Jalira: Only 5 to 6? Don’t get me wrong, that is still amazing. But didnt you say something about like a million toys.

Jeanne: That's why I do multiple at the same time, if they fit well together. I might act childlike, but I am actually really creative and attentive to the toys at that time. I always remember how good each toy was to an incredible degree and also how well it performed individually and in combination with others. And that's what I document after the play session.

Jalira: That's amazing. I wish I could play with stuff and remember everything afterwards.

Jeanne: It is a skill that I was blessed with. A very niche skill, but a skill nonetheless.

Jalira: Alright, and do you think you are an effective helper for Santa this Christmas?

Jeanne: I would like to believe so. I feel like the youngest child and the most mature adult of the group, which is a combination I bet no one has ever experienced before. Santa has also told me multiple times that my reports were actually helping him make optimizations to various parts, so I can confidently say that I am quite good at what I am doing.

Even if you probably shouldn't watch me while I am doing my job… and I need a helper elf more times that I can count…

Jalira: Haha, but needing some help is no shame, you know? Well, with that the interview is coming to a close. Is there anything you would want to say before we wrap things up?

Jeanne: Never lose that childhood spirit, you guys. You never know what fun you miss out on when you try to act tough and tell yourself that you don't need games or toys anymore.

Jalira: Thank you very much for the interview today, Jeanne! It was an honor meeting you today. This was Jalira, from the from the Nagisa’s wish opportunity journalist service, thank you for tuning in and I’ll see you all… in the second part of this interview~

Jeanne: Thank you too.

Jalira: See you all in a bit~

—

Jalira: Welcome back to the second part of this interview, streaming live from the heart of Christmas itself with a very special guest. Everyone please welcome the man, the myth, the legend: Santa Claus!

Santa: Ho ho ho, everyone. Thank you for letting me be part of this show. I heard you had some questions for me again, and I will be happy to answer all of them as far as my secrecy allows it.

Jalira: That's good to hear. This year, a certain dark goddess named Nagisa has provided you with some exceptional girls to support you. One of them is a girl named Jeanne. For my first question: What do you think of her?

Santa: What a girl. She is like the full package of a doting older sister and an over-excitable younger sister to all the girls that work here. Always a welcome sight. Not to mention how careful and thoughtful all of her reports are. She really is both parts of Christmas, the adult who organizes and the child who enjoys everything.

However, the amount of times she has gotten stuck in a chimney or even just the doorframe is frankly astounding…

Jalira: I see. So do you think having her help out is something that made your life easier?

Santa: You never realize how many details go into all of these toys until someone takes the time to analyze them thoroughly. As such I have actually found out a lot about the toys we deliver that I didn't know about before, things like why certain games on consoles are more popular than others or what children value in lego figures.

And that is only really possible to find out if you have a childlike view of the world, but the possibility to articulate as an adult. As such, Jeanne is absolutely a godsend and a one of a kind addition, who gave us possibilities to improve our work in ways never thought possible before.

Not only because of the things she can do, but also because of her incredible work attitude and attention to detail. She seemed like a stickler for details, which really works in her favor in her current position.

Jalira: I can definitely see how that is a good thing. Then let's go to the final question of the day: Would you say that Jeanne is a nice or a naughty girl?

Santa: I would give her a double rating for both of her sides. She is a nice girl when she acts like an adult and is reliable to no end. And she is an adorably nice girl when she is lost in her childish attitude. Ho ho ho~

Jalira: Hahaha~ Good to know! Thank you so much for your time Mr. Claus and I’ll see you again in the next interview of your new employees. This has been genie Jalira from the Nagisa’s wish opportunity journalist service, thank you so much for tuning in and I’ll see you all… next time~