Finding your own reality photographers spirit (Tg) Draft (Patreon)

“Uhm… excuse me, uhm… miss… lady…? There is no other empty seat, so could I perhaps sit down and join you…?”

“Scanning…. Scan complete. There are indeed no other seats available, though for some this table is almost completely empty, besides me, that is. Of course you may… Oh, hello Paul. Yeah, a friend is always welcome to sit down with me.”

“...ookaaay. How do you know my name? Are you connected to some sort of database where my name is listed or something?”

“What? Nothing of this sort is true. This unit’s name is Tomas Sterlinger and the two of us have been friends for 12 years, 8 months and 19 days, though the specific time of day we met is no longer in my memory.”

“Wait… You are Thomas? You look… uhm… different.”

“I just confirmed that. I am indeed Thomas, though in recent times I have played with the notion of renaming this unit to something more appropriate to its design.”

“You mean something more feminine, like Tiara?”

“Acknowledged. This unit's new name should henceforth be changed to ‘Tiara’. Thanks for your suggestion.”

“No, that was not what i… Never mind. So, do you want to tell me what happened to you today or not?”

“There is a 82% chance that you won’t believe me, but I will still tell you what transpired today, per your request.”

“I’m listening…”

“While traversing the underwaters today, I found something very much of note. This camera right here is the key to all the fun I had today.”

“A robot can have fun…”

“I am able to mimic even the most complex emotions of a human, when necessary, and having fun is the most ‘fun’ emotion to experience.”

“...”

“Anyway, after a brief examination of its functions, I quickly made the connection that this was one of these fabled reality cameras. A camera that can change anything in front of its lenses to whatever filter you have applied to it. And all without the target ever noticing anything.”

“...and you used it on yourself?”

“Negative. That would have been a foolish mistake, and those are only reserved for humans.”

“Goooootcha.”

“As I was saying, right after I acquired the camera, my sensores picked up my first target and the perfect guinea pig for a bit of experimentation. That blabbering fool Jack had just gone into the sea for a swim and it seemed like a fitting chance for revenge on him for all his misdoings at work.”

“You really never liked Jack, did you?”

“Affirmative, but now I could at least improve his body a little bit.”

“What did you do?”

“Just a few necessary adjustments. Like for example deleting most of his visible muscle mass and shrinking him from his respectable size of 1,83 meters down to about 1,62 meters. He looked so much better when being small and cute.”

“Are you serious?”

“Affirmative, then I tempered with his hair a little bit to make it super long and reach past his butt. You should have see how he started to struggle swimming without his muscles and with the drag force of his new mane.”

“Did you drown him?”

“Negative. He is a good swimmer and didn’t notice the differences beside it getting a bit harder to move than he was used to. Hence I shrank his waist to the minimal possible setting while making sure his butt, hips and thighs became large, drag force intensive behemoths.”

“...this almost sounds like your goal was to turn him into a girl.”

“Then I deleted his penis and had him grow a subtle pair of breasts.”

“So your goal WAS to turn him into a girl.”

“Affirmative, but only halfway through. The idea actually occured to me only after I thought he looked small and cute.”

“Uhg… Okay, what did you do after that?”

“I gave her a very small bikini. The girl was starting to panic since she thought she had always been a girl, yet wore nothing to cover her top.”

“No... that was not what I… Did you turn him into something else after that?”

“I think ‘her’ would be a much more fitting pronoun for Jack after my actions.”

*takes a deep breath* “Did you turn her into something else after that?”

“I turned her into a succubus.”

“You what?”

“A succubus is a female-only subcategory of demons, also known as demons of lust. They have horns and demonic tails just as regular demons, but are very beautiful and exist to seduce humans, both male and female. Have you never heard of them?”

“I have, but the better question is: Your camera can do that? It can just straight up turn people into demons?”

“Affirmative. This camera is capable of quite a lot and most likely a lot more than I have been able to find out.”

“Okay, I think I get it. You turned Jack into a succubus.”

“Affirmative. It looked quite painful when those horns started to grow out of his head, but I couldn't fully pay attention to it, since I randomly had a headache at the same time.”

“Listen, I think you have changed yourself as much as you have changed Jack with this camera.”

“Nonsense. I might look similar to what he looks like now, but I assure you, I have very advanced neurological computation that allows me to avoid nearly every single human mistake. Something like that would never happen to me.”

“Didn’t you say that this thing had reality warping powers?”

“Affirmative. The target will never realize that he has changed.”

“Then let me guess: You turned him into a robot next.”

“Negative, but your guess is not far off. I did not turn Jack into anything else, but when his girlfriend showed up and complained why he looked so different, I decided to have some more fun.”

“So you turned Bianca into a robot.”

“I turned Bianca into a highly advanced girlfriend replacement robot. One that has a great ability to mimic human emotions, is highly adaptive to any situation and many, many more things.”

“Does this perchance remind you of someone…?”

“This does in fact sound very similar to myself, but again, I assure you, we are different models. I am a succubus beach girlfriend model and she is not. So we are different.”

“You don’t say…”

“Your ramen is finished. Here you go.”

“You have my thanks, dear waitress.”

“Not sure if a robot like you can eat that, but enjoy!”

“The waitress was right to have concerns. Are you sure you can eat this?”

“No need to worry. I'm built with a highly advanced reactor that can draw energy from nearly anything.”

“What does that have to do with food…?”

“Thanks for the… meal…”

“Thomas? …I mean Tiara? Why have you stopped?”

“...”

“Why are you reaching for your camera?”

“I have just detected Victor and his girlfriend. Food will have to wait, time for my revenge on those two!”

“Uhm… No! Wait! Tiara! Don’t run off! You will… just… And she is gone.”

“...”

“...it really makes me wonder what she will look like at the end of the day…”

---

Man this camera is surely something else. I can turn basically anything into anything else. How awesome is that? What, side effects? There is no way anything can happen to me. I am the one holding the camera!