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so there was smashing and there was amy?! DAAAAMN Y'ALL THIS SHOW IS INSANE!!!

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Brandon Scott

I see this kind of take about Spike all the time and it really blows my mind, lol. He is a vampire. Period. He changed in how he dealt with Buffy because he can hurt Buffy. In other words, the power dynamic has changed. He's no longer muzzled. I always watch that scene with watery eyes. Buffy is hurting so much in that scene (depression, shame, feeling isolated, and now even more broken thanks to Spike). It breaks my heart. Also, this is the episode I remember as the one when Spike shifts his impersonation of an abusive-narcissist into high gear.

Troika S

Mm, Spike's literally always been a manipulative abuser, that's been consistent since basically his introduction. He has layers to him so he doesn't just come off as a one-dimensional demonized caricature, which is often how abusers are portrayed in media to make them unambiguous, but even so it's always been there. His toxic relationship with Dru, his abusive treatment of Harmony who he basically just treated like a disposable sex doll, his literal "no means yes" stalking of Buffy. Spike's funny and fun and has depth to him, and James has a wonderful innate charisma which makes him easy to watch and empathize with, but the character is practically made entirely out of red flags. Buffy and Spike's relationship, if you want to call it that, was never going to be healthy. Their first kiss literally initiates in Once More With Feeling with Buffy singing that she knows there's nothing real there, she's just using him out of a desperate need to feel something through her depression and he's taking advantage of it. Their sex scene isn't romantic because what they have isn't romantic; the episode basically drops all metaphor and allegory with the initiating fight scene and shows you exactly what Buffy and Spike's relationship is- abusive, destructive and borne out of depression and despair.