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buffy makes for quite an interesting story inddeeeeedddd!!

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Girl4Music

I like the parallel with Xander and Anya after having sex from 4x03 “Now we can just move on.” When they don’t actually know if they can move on. But that’s just it though, if he had went through with it and married Anya without facing his fears, it would have been the wrong thing to do. What I mean by him facing his fears is him confronting Anya that he actually had concerns about marrying her because he believed that he would end up hurting her in the end. Yes, she’d be pissed but least they would have avoided this leaving her at the altar fiasco. And odds are they would have still stayed together and when they were ready to try it again, Xander would be passed all that. I think some of what upset Anya was that she thought by him leaving her at the altar, it meant that Xander didn’t want to be with her anymore when that wasn’t the case. He did. He just didn’t want to marry her there and then. There is the thought that maybe he would never be ready to marry her but then it still wouldn’t be about her. It would just be because he wasn’t ready for marriage period. It was never about Anya why he didn’t want to go through with it. It was always about him and his fears. I mean I could be wrong about this but I think they just needed more time. I think they rushed into marriage because Anya was desperate to get on with her life. And Xander I think fed into that desperation when he asked her to marry him because they were always in situations where either one of them could die at any point. And Anya was always worried about that. Dying before she really got a chance to live as a human. To make a real go at it and she was only interested in doing that with Xander and him not wanting to do the same at that point in time would have disappointed her, sure, but least she would know about it. She needed to know that this was what was going on in his head. That’s what I meant about it being the wrong thing to do to marry her. There was something he needed to face and address with his soon-to-be bride. And that was that he made a mistake in proposing to her not because he didn’t want to be with her, but because he just didn’t want to get married to her. Not then at least. They needed more time to see how it went with them being together so he could overcome his fears. To see that he wasn’t his father and that he wouldn’t hurt her in that angry, hateful, violent way he worried he would.

Pauline Robertson

No I think you're spot on about them. I also think part of the reason Xander proposed was, trying not to be like his parents, he wanted this to work out, to get the 'happy ending'. He just pushed it and went too fast then realised what he'd done and wanted to back out. It was just at the worst time.

Pauline Robertson

The next episode is mwah lol one of my favs of the show.