The Zachari & Nik Show - Episode 2 - That Time of The Month (Patreon)

Thanks again to Adam for collaborating with me on this side project, I'm enjoying it tremendously and I hope all of you will too!

That Time of the Month

Short story by Adam Lunter

Nik heard the knock at the front door and groaned inside as he got up. He had been dreading this moment, not just because the full moon was about to rise and it was time to get strapped in for the night but also because he had seen Alek as one of those whack-ass angel thingies that Finn had turned into the night before. Did he have his own little plushie faerie like Finn did? And apparently now him too?

Christ, this just keeps sucking more and more.

“It’s that time of the month!” sang Alek as Nik opened the door.

“A joy to see you too,” Nik said. Normally he would have stepped aside and let him in at this point but instead he stood there in the doorway. “Look Alek, I...” Alek could tell he was being blocked. “Erm... are you going to let me in before the moon comes up?”

“Yeah, about that,” Nik said hurriedly. “Maybe we could do this at your place?”

Alek scanned Nik’s form, completely disregarding Nik’s request. “And why have you got your street clothes on?” he asked. “They’ll be torn to shreds.”

“Alek please, I’d really like to...”

“Who’s at the door?” came a guttural but toy-like voice behind Nik.

Alek flinched. “What the hell is going on in...”

Over Nik’s right shoulder appeared Zachari, his wings fluttering slowly enough to keep him hovering in place. Alek caught sight of the faerie and then burst into gales of laughter. Nik closed his eyes and leaned his head on his bicep, sighing.

“Well well well,” Alek finally said after he had calmed a bit. “Congratulations on being chosen, Nik! I must say, it couldn’t have happened to a nicer guy!”

“Nicer, my foot!” said the faerie. “This guy’s about as friendly as a T-Rex with an ass itch!”

“Sounds about right,” Alek said, shoving Nik aside and walking in to the apartment.

“Which one are you?”

“Zachari.”

“Oh right! You’re the one that tries to come off as a thug,” Alek said as he removed his coat and draped it over the arm of Nik’s sofa. “King told me about you.”

“There’s no trying involved, Blondie,”” Zachari shot back. “Wait... you’re King’s human?”

“In the flesh,” Alek said, spreading his hands and bowing slightly at the waist.

Zachari snorted. “Perfect match. A snob for a snob.”

Alek was not fazed a bit as he pointed his finger at Nik. “I should say the same. This one also has the tough-guy façade as well.”

“I’m standing right here,” Nik interjected.

Alek went on speaking as if nothing had happened. “You’ll be butting heads with him for a while, I’m afraid.”

“Great,” moaned Zachari. “If the first twenty four hours are anything to go by, we’re doomed!.”

“That bad, eh?”

“All he does is walk around here naked and eat anything that stands still long enough to be eaten!”

“I said I’m standing right here!” Nik shouted.

“Oh hush,” Alek said. He didn’t even look at Nik as he waved him away. “Go get undressed and let the grownups talk.”

Nik stood there for a moment looking like he had been slapped, then turned and headed into his bedroom, swearing under his breath.

Alek lowered his voice and drew nearer. “I’m sure you want to kill him right now but trust me, the effort will be worth it.”

“It had better be,” grumbled the faerie.

“He has a lot going on between the ears and behind the sternum,” Alek said, inclining his head towards the open door of Nik’s bedroom. In it, the shadow of Nik undressing danced on the wall.

“I know about the werewolf thing and what went down with his ex,” Zachari said, softening his own voice a bit.

“I don’t know anything about his ex,” Alek said. “All I know is that once you have his trust, you have a friend for life — one who will walk through Hell to get you a glass of water and not steal a sip for himself.”

Zachari’s features softened. “I hope you’re right,” he said with a sigh.

“I am right,” Alek replied. He held up his right hand and twisted the gold ring on his finger. “Sure you don’t want to talk to King for a bit?”

Zachari looked out the window to his left. “No,” he said after a dramatic pause. “I prefer to work alone.”

Alek nodded once. “Suit yourself,” he said and then headed into the bedroom.

“Can you make his restraints a little tighter than normal just for my satisfaction?” Zachari asked.

“Ask me next month,” Alek said as he unbuttoned his sleeves and started to roll them up to his elbows.

“I will if he lives that long!”

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