Gacha God: No Regrets (ch. 22) (Patreon)

"Your eyes are fine," Peter told me as I lounged on the couch back in the man cave. I winced at the light he was flickering in my eyes to check my pupil dilation and other medical related stuff, quickly closing them and resting the wet cloth back over my eyes. The coolness of the ice pack wrapped within helped with the throbbing ache. "The X-rays also looked good. As far as I can tell, it's more of an issue with the eyes themselves rather than an issue with the surgery."

So, I wasn't going to have to go eyeless for a bit? Good to know.

"He's okay? Shouldn't we go to a hospital?" Mary Jane asked, sounding worried as she hovered nearby. "I mean… he was looking at me and then his eyes started to bleed!" She repeated, and I guess I couldn't exactly blame her for being freaked out. She didn't seem to remember the white expanse we found ourselves in, at least as far as I could tell. So, from her perspective, we were in the middle of a conversation and my eyes started to pump out blood like a broken faucet. It wasn't an inconsiderable amount of blood either.

"Sebastian?" Peter asked me, sounding similarly worried. "I'm not a doctor, so they could have a much better idea of what's going on than me."

"Ehh, I doubt that they would know how to deal with this. It's probably fine," I dismissed, waving them off. The pain was more of a dull ache at this point, and the worst of it was that my eyes felt irritated. The kind of irritated that came from staying up all night and the thirty minutes of sleep you did get made you feel more tired than if you went without sleep entirely.

"Quit being such a guy! Your eyes were bleeding!" Mary Jane interjected, sounding exasperated that I wasn't marching directly to the hospital. "That's not something that just fixes itself after a nap!"

"I suppose I'll have to see after I take a nap," I refuted. "The strain came from the eyes themselves. Actually… MJ, do you remember anything before they started bleeding? Anything out of the ordinary?" I asked, and I could hear Mary Jane shuffling a bit. Oh?

There was a telling pause, "Maybe? I mean… it's… was kind of like… I forgot something? Or like I was waking up? I didn't really think anything of it until you mentioned it, but it kind of felt like I lost some time?" She questioned, sounding uncertain herself. Meaning that she had no solid memories of what transpired. Was that a result of her not 'waking up' or was it the nature of that…

Tsukuyomi.

The word rang out in my head like a bell, and I knew that's what it was called. I seriously underestimated what these peepers were capable of. Using Tsukuyomi had been instinctual, accidental even. I just wanted to show off some cool spins to impress MJ.

"Of all the abilities I could have ended up with…" I muttered underneath my breath. It was a rare thing that I disliked an item. There was always a special thrill when I threw the dice and got something new. I had thrown the dice thousands of times in my life -- some items were more useful than others, some were mainstays and others were single use, but all of them had a special place in my heart. However, there were times when I got an item and… I didn't like it. Even if I could use it, I didn't like it.

"Sebastian?" Peter questioned and I let out a sigh.

"I'm good. The pain is mostly gone, and I'm just being a baby about it now," I admitted. There were different kinds of pain. Breaking an arm or losing a limb? Easy to deal with. Stubbing your toe or feeling like your eyes were coated in sand? Absolutely unbearable. Some kinds of pain you just couldn't get used to. "Sorry about ruining the night," I added lamely. Mary Jane had panicked, which got Peter and Ned's attention, and in a rush we all came back to the man cave to make sure my body wasn't rejecting my new eyes.

"You don't have to apologize, Sebastian," Mary Jane said, grabbing my hand and giving it a tight squeeze with both of hers. "Are you sure you're okay though?"

Physically? "Yeah, I'm good," I reassured everyone. Mentally… if it had been a year ago, then I would have given the eyes back. Or pawned them off. Way back when I had more items then I knew what to do with, when I was drowning in options and I got to pick my favorites. I wasn't. I had a handful of options that I had to refine until I built up my Cave of Wonders. Something I didn't normally bother with unless it was a favorite of mine. The eyes… they were too good for me to throw away. I could use them. I knew how to use them.

It was just a very sick twist of irony that I would gain the ability to create illusionary worlds.

I could practically feel the others sharing a glance at that. It was Ned who spoke up, though, "Well… I was going to have to leave soon anyway. Dr.- er, a package arrived and I need to… bring hi- it in," Ned tried his best to speak in code, but it really didn't come naturally to him. I guess it didn't help that we usually spoke rather freely.

The package in question was Dr. Hall. And my Gravitonium. Meaning that I would be getting my upgraded AT's soon. I couldn't wait! All the items I got recently lent themselves pretty well to the style that I was currently rocking. The upgraded AT's would massively upgrade my mobility. My yoyo gave me some striking power and my totem gave me area of control. Lastly, my slate gave me some mobility denial. Had to work out the kinks, but I had a very workable set of items -- especially when I could predict movement. And failing that, I could trap someone in an illusionary world if I didn't mind the sensation of my eyes popping.

Tsukuyomi would be a last resort. An ace I kept up my sleeve. One that I would use with reluctance because… for the same reasons I hated mind control. It sucked being on the receiving end of it, and I was a firm believer of doing unto others that you wished done unto you.

"Oh, yeah -- I forgot all about the package," Peter quickly exclaimed. That didn't sound fake either. I guess he really got caught up with Liz. Sorry buddy, I'll find a way to make it up to you. "Do you need anyone to go with you?"

"Well," Ned trailed off, sounding a little nervous about going solo.

"I'll be fine," I repeated, knowing that Dr. Hall was way more important. I imagine Shield was less than pleased about losing him and the Gravitonium and I would be so annoyed if we lost them both because Peter and Ned were being worry warts. I appreciated the concern, but it wasn't necessary. I wanted my upgraded AT's.

"I'll watch over him. You guys go get the 'package,'" Mary Jane said, and I could practically hear the air quotes. "I'll call if he starts bleeding again," she reassured them after a moment of hesitation.

"Alright. Hope you feel better, Sebastian," both Peter and Ned wished me well before they left the man cave. They took extra special care with the door that I had knocked down because it was barely on the hinges. We would have to get that replaced quickly. I waved them goodbye and settled in on the couch.

There was a small beat of silence as Mary Jane took a seat on the coffee table next to me. "So, Italy. What was that about?" She questioned, sounding curious.

"A real mess is what it was about. Some guy kidnapped a Shield scientist because he found this super rare and powerful element, and Shield sent in a girl with zero training to rescue him. We got called into the mess to rescue her because we thought she was a prisoner, but she had guzzled down the kool-aid, so I had to kidnap her and rescue the guy that I was there to kidnap along with the Gravitonium." I sighed. "And the flights were absolutely awful. Fourteen hours to and from. In coach. I'm flying first class exclusively from now on. Or I'm going to steal a plane. Either or."

"And the package is the guy you… rescued?" Mary Jane ventured, sounding more amused than alarmed.

"Hm," I grunted an affirmative.

"Sounds rough… are you… going to be okay, though? Your face is really out there now. People are going to recognize you. Won't that interfere with being a hero?" She asked, her voice becoming a little more hesitant and uncertain. Like she was leading up to something she really wanted to ask.

"I only hid who I was out of convenience. Now I mostly do it because it would mess with Peter and Ned's lives. I never thought hiding my identity was going to last forever," I told her, offering a small shrug. Shield was a multi-bajillion super secret spy agency. I would sure fucking hope that they could eventually catch me with my half hearted efforts of staying on the DL. "Why?"

Mary Jane was silent for a brief moment, "Well… I don't know. I saw the video of you in Italy and heard all about the chaos, and I… realized that I really don't know that much about you? Like… where do you live? Do you have any siblings?" Mary Jane questioned and I could hear her shifting uncomfortably.

I pursed my lips, "Honestly, you're probably better off not knowing, MJ. You're going to be an actor, right? I'm not really a hero. Or hero material. You're genuinely better off keeping your distance from me."

"I know," Mary Jane admitted. "Mom told me that much." Ah, so she didn't like me. I was right. "And I'm not looking for… some… commitment or something. I just want… to know you." She finished, and I could hear her cringing as she spoke, but that was her nerves. The question was actually pretty sweet. Sweet enough that it poked me in my soft spots and a small sigh escaped me.

"You probably won't like all the answers you get, but I'll answer them," I told Mary Jane and that seemed to perk her up.

"Really? You will?" She questioned, and I nodded. "Well, do your parents know what you're doing? Being Audacity?" She asked, and she sounded a bit like a dog with a car -- she didn't expect to get this far and she had no idea what she should ask.

"No idea," I admitted. There was the very real possibility that all of this was another mental illusion. A fake world created to trick me into thinking that I escaped. Again. "Not really on speaking terms with my dad. I have no idea who my mom is," I added.

There was a pause, "Oh." Mary Jane muttered, seemingly regretting that she asked. "Did she…?"

"No clue. My Dad… well, I guess you could call him a player. He finds interesting women, knocks them up, then they usually give custody," I explained in a way that she could understand. In this case, the custody deal was done beforehand in exchange for something -- power, influence, rolling something back or securing a future. Every woman was someone incredible in some way. Dad wouldn't look at average. Honestly, if you cracked open a textbook or googled powerful women in history, you could probably guess correctly that they were a baby momma for my dad. "And to answer your other question -- I had plenty of siblings. A metric shit ton."

Less so now.

Mary Jane seemed to be processing that. Maybe she would think my dad was some kind of rockstar. If I thought she was ready for the truth, then I'd tell her. "Were you close?"

I didn't answer for a long moment, not entirely knowing how to answer honestly. The truth was… "Sort of?" I tried, frowning to myself as I massaged my eyes through the cloth covering my face. The icepack was pretty melted at this point. "There were a bunch of… cliques, you could call them, and everyone generally got on with the people in that clique. But, well… Dad liked to encourage… competition between his kids. So, even when we were on teams, you couldn't really trust your brothers and sisters."

To be betrayed, you had to have trust. That's why only the people closest to you could betray you.

I had been betrayed three times in my life. That was the number of times it took for me to learn to only have trust and faith in myself.

"Your Dad sounds like an asshole," Mary Jane remarked. And she didn't know the half of it.

"Yup," I agreed wholeheartedly. "It sucked. A lot. But, well… I don't know. He thought that he was… helping? Sort of?" Maybe not help in a traditional sense. What he put us through -- the lessons he taught, the punishments he dealt out, and the competition itself to see who got to call themselves his son or daughter… it wasn't cruelty for the sake of cruelty, regardless of how cruel it was. It was done purposefully, deliberately, and all to create someone. Something.

"That doesn't make it okay, Sebastian. Are- are you still in contact with him?" She asked, sounding genuinely worried.

Maybe. "No idea. I'm sure he knows where to find me if he is looking. I ran away. He made us compete for his love and, well, I eventually realized that I didn't give a shit if he loved me or not," I confessed. It was an odd realization to have, to be honest.

My very first memories were being told that to be called my father's son, I had to earn that right. A right that could only be earned through victory -- by murdering every single one of my siblings through strength of arms or cunning. By learning what he had to teach and mastering it. There were lessons even to be found in failure and punishment. We all wanted it. We didn't know anything else, so we followed along, craving his kind words and acknowledgment.

I wish I could say that I had had some grand epiphany, but that wasn't really the case. As the finish line began to loom, as the number of dead siblings began to grow, as the long awaited betrayals began to take place…

"Why did you run away?" Mary Jane asked, and I thought that was an odd question to ask.

I knew the answer, though. "Because I was going to win the competition," I confessed. I was going to win. All I had to do was step over the finish line. It wasn't much more than formality. However, as that finish line loomed… "And I didn't care. Figured that if the others wanted his love, they could fight for it." A vast understatement, but it was the simplest way to say it.

He told us to kill for his love. He told us to die for it. He taught us to lie, cheat, steal, betray, and murder for it. Everyone did their best to live up to that expectation, but the fact of the matter was some of us were completely unable to. A sister that loved to paint and everything she drew became alive. A sister that could bind you with so many soul-contracts that you couldn't tie your shoes without her permission. A brother able to see the future, up to and including his own death at the hands of people he trusted.

We treated his love as if it was something valuable. Something worth killing over.

It wasn't. And it never had been.

"I'm sorry," Mary Jane muttered, sounding like she genuinely regretted asking.

"Don't be. I told you, MJ -- I'm not sad about it. I'm glad it happened. It made me who I am, and I love who I am. Wouldn't change for anything in the world," I told her, being completely honest. If this world was real and not another illusion, if I really did get out… if you gave me a chance to go back to the start, I'd probably do it all over again.

To that, Mary Jane chuckled. Prompting me to ask something, "Why so curious? My past never mattered before. What's up?" I asked her, sending that this was building up to something.

"When I saw the video of you in Italy, I realized something. Sort of. I realized that… I'm… you've done a lot for me, Sebastian. You stood up to my dad, you dropped a million dollars on us, and you care enough to stand up for me and attend a play when you probably have way more important things to be doing. And I appreciate it. But, I realized that I'm… a really small part of your life," Mary Jane began. "You're like… the wind. I feel like one day, you're just going to fly off and I'm never going to see you again."

I didn't reply or offer reassurance. She wasn't wrong. I came to New York because… well… I had fond memories of this city, and I wanted to see if my first illusionary life had been rose tinted glasses or not. I was friends with Peter and Ned. And Mary Jane. There were still a lot of experiences to have in New York, but it was undeniably true that I would eventually move on.

"It's pretty embarrassing to admit, but I started fantasizing and stuff -- you asking me to come with you, or learning how to kick ass and whatever. But, I really thought about it. A lot. And I realized that… if you asked me to leave with you… I'd say no," Mary Jane said, her voice small and soft, as if she were trying to lessen the blow.

I don't think she expected me to laugh. "You shouldn't be sorry about that, MJ."

"I know. I'm not. I wouldn't want to leave my mom behind, and I know what I want for my future. I'm going to be an actor. I can't do that if I follow you to the ends of the earth," she continued, her tone more confident. A small sigh escaped her, "So, I would say no. But… it also made me realize that I shouldn't waste the time that we do have." She added, reaching out to take my hand. "I don't want to look back and wish that I had done this or that."

Slowly, I started to sit up, but Mary Jane placed a hand on my chest, keeping me pinned to the cushions while she got up. The couch sank a bit as Mary Jane climbed on top of me, sitting down on my groin. She took a second to settle before I started to reach up to the cloth covering my eyes, but a hand stopped me. "This is really embarrassing for me, you know," she told me.

"Alright. But you better take responsibility if this awakens something in me," I pointed out, letting my hands fall onto her smooth thighs that straddled my waist. Mary Jane chuckled warmly before she shifted, leaning down to press her lips against mine. I tasted strawberries immediately while her hands went to the cloth to keep it secure. The kiss started chaste, her lips moving against mine in a slow methodical fashion.

Slowly, the kiss deepened. Her tongue brushed against mine and I felt her breathing get a little harsher on my cheek. My hands slowly traced her exposed thighs, inching towards the hem of her dress and when my fingers slipped under it for the first time, Mary Jane began to grind her hips against me.

What I didn't expect was for her to break the kiss off to lean back, her breathing sounding harsh. I might have thought I went too far if it wasn't for the sound of rustling cloth that was thrown in my face a second later. The fabric of her dress. "This is just cruel," I decided -- I could touch but couldn't look? That was backward.

"Oh, poor baby," Mary Jane teased before leaning back in. She pressed her lips against mine again, and my hands began to unabashedly roam her body. My fingers sunk into the soft flesh of her ass, earning a moan of approval into my mouth. I didn't venture where her panties covered, instead choosing to let one hand drift upward to the small of her back while I groped her ass. I felt the smooth flesh of her back, a hand rising up to the bra strap. With deft ease, I unhooked it with a twist of my fingers.

Mary Jane responded by pulling the bra down her slender arms and tossing it to the side before grabbing my hand and pressing it to her breast. I felt her stiff nipple press into the palm of my hand, her hips grinding into me harder. Breaking the kiss, I left a trail of them down her neck as she panted in my ear, her breath hitching when my lips found her breast. She mewled in approval and I decided to be bold. Lifting up with my hips, I maneuvered myself into a sitting position before I lowered Mary Jane onto the couch.

The cloth covering my eyes fell off, revealing her to me for the first time. Her pale skin was flushed, her lips bright red and her green eyes dilated with arousal. The flush extended well past her checks, down to her collarbone and breasts. Her nipples were stiff and a rosy red, her stomach flat while the only article of clothing left on her was a pair of red panties. She seemed embarrassed despite the fact that she has absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about.

"I told you not to look," Mary Jane whined, but made no effort to cover herself. I drank her in, my hands gliding up her thighs to settle on her hips.

"I thought you liked the bad boy aesthetic?" I questioned, my cock straining against my pants, doing its absolute damnedest to break free of the jeans. Mary Jane bit her lip seductively before rolling her eyes at me.

"Boys want a good girl that's bad for them," She remarked, her pussy grinding at my groin. She was on the verge of soaking through her panties by the looks of it. "And girls want a bad boy who is only good for them."

Oh? "I want to see you acting bad," I remarked with a smirk, pulling off my shirt and I saw her eyes glide over the clear cut muscle. Almost of their own will, her hands reached up, stroking my abs before her tongue darted out, licking her lips. I grabbed her hands in one of mine and effortlessly pinned them to the arm of the couch behind her head. With my other, it glided to her pussy, a thin and damp piece of cloth protecting her from my direct touch. Her eyes widened dramatically and I watched Mary Jane swallow thickly.

I maintained eye contact with her as I stroked her nether lips through her panties, grinding at her clit through them, and I took note of her reactions. Feeling the pads of my fingers growing damp, I chose to slip them over the top of her panties, inching to her pussy, and her hips rose to give me better access.

"Hnah~!" Mary Jane moaned when my fingers slid inside her slick pussy. It squelched noisily, revealing how wet she really was. Her switch was flipped all the way on. My smirk was downright smug as I began to finger fuck her, slipping in a second finger and curling them while I ground the palm of my hand into her clit. "Oh, fuck- Sebastian-" Mary Jane breathed, realizing that she had bit off more than she could chew.

I was no blushing virgin, after all.

The man cave became filled with the sounds of her breathless moans, trying to keep her voice low which just made them sexier. Her arousal spilled out over my fingers, leaving them practically dripping with it. I would need to clean the couch, but that was a distant concern as Mary Jane writhed underneath me. I saw her orgasm brewing inside of her, her walls clenching around my digits, fighting to keep me buried inside of her. Eventually, her gaze met mine, "Kiss me-" she all but begged, but got cut off when I kissed her hard.

I felt her coming undone beneath me. Her legs hooked around me, her walls spasming around my fingers as she moaned into my mouth. Her body trembled like a leaf, shivering for a long minute as she rode out the highs of her climax. I broke the kiss a minute later to see that Mary Jane's eyes were practically glazed over. "That was…" Mary Jane breathed, her chest rising and falling with labored breaths.

I cupped her chin, tracing her bottom lip with a thumb. "That was just the beginning, MJ." Oh, she looked nervous. So, I followed it up with…

"I'm going to make sure you don't have any regrets."

It was a good policy in general, and I was all too eager to oblige her in this.