Home Artists Posts Import Register
Join the new SimpleX Chat Group!

Content

I opened my eyes to a world framed by darkness, contrasting the pure white light of the ground. Directly in front of me was a woman sitting on a lavish white throne. Her light blue hair set in a peculiar style, a half ponytail, but with the two strands pulled back to create it fed through a round dark blue ornament that peeked over the back of her head, forming a loop of hair behind her. Blue seemed to be a theme of hers, I noticed -- blue eyes, blue dress, blue gemstone embedded in the ribbon on the front of her blouse. The color theme was only broken up by the white and gold trimming on her sleeveles shirt and short skirt, and a pink, translucent ribbon-like celestial shawl that wrapped around her upper arms, and white sleeves that left her shoulders bare.

"Oh, welcome Hero," the girl began, giving me a gentle look. I only realized that I was sitting in a chair across from her when I straightened up. "I am the goddess known as Aqua, here to guide you to the afterlife."

I blinked… "Shit, I died?" I questioned, my gaze dipping down to my hand where the Star should be. I didn't see any sign of it, or of the burns that had scorched my hand.

"Heroically," Aqua agreed with a nod. "Alduin the World-Eater was slain by your hand. Nirn shall live in eternal peace forever more. Your actions and deeds will live on in legend until the end of time," Aqua continued, earning a slow blink from me. I clenched and unclenched my hand, mulling that over for a moment.

I died. A second time. I managed to take Alduin with me… but the cost had been high. A lot of people had died. Alduin… I don't think I had ever underestimated him, but I had overestimated myself and the preparations we had made. If the plan had gone off like it should have, then the Graybeards would still be alive. Paarthurnax would be alive. Farkas and Vilkas would be alive. Aela… I could only hope that Aela was still alive. Sheogorath would come back eventually, but it could take some time depending on the vote to bring her back instantly.

Above all else…

"I broke my promise to Hestia," I muttered regretfully. I hadn't voiced it aloud, but I had promised myself that I would come back to her. Shit. I should have said something. To her and to Lili. Something. Anything. Just… something other than ignoring them to chase after Alduin.

I had an alarming amount of regrets in death, I realized. I should have realized that Alduin would have appeared when Serana used the Elder Scroll to learn Dragonrend -- all the hints were there. An Elder Scroll was a piece of the space-time continuum, Alduin was already due to arrive soon as he traveled through the time-stream… I should have realized that Serana learning Dragonrend before he was out would just give him an exit. I regret not spending more time with Hestia and Lili. It wasn't like most of our preparations were worth a damn, so I could have taken more time…

Above all else, I regretted dying.

"That… doesn't make any sense," I told Aqua with a shake of my head. "I know of at least three other world ending threats. There are probably a solid dozen or so that have the potential." I pointed out, opening my eyes to see a look of shock pass over her face.

"A-a dozen?! I knew Nirn was a crazy place, but isn't that a bit much?!" She protested, the composed and dutiful goddess air she carried about herself slipping ever so slightly. She seemed to realize this because she paused, coughed into her hand, then threw on that same kind smile that looked way more fake now. "Ahem -- worry not dear hero, all shall be well for Nirn. The allies that you left behind shall continue your work to bring peace to every corner of the world."

Wait one second here…

"Yet, there are other worlds that suffer, oh Hero-" Aqua began, and I frowned deeply. This made less and less sense the more I thought about it. Processing the whole dying thing distracted me for a minute, but now that I was focusing on her and my surroundings -- this made no sense at all.

"Is this a sales pitch?" I questioned, looking around the place. I knew this place. And I knew this goddess. "I'm a member of the Hestia Familia -- I should be in her afterlife. What the hell is this? Did you kidnap me?" I demanded, making Aqua's face pinch up as the kind smile melted into a frustrated glare and pout.

"She kidnapped you from me first!" She shouted, jabbing her scepter in my direction -- a white metal staff with a pink flower bud to serve as the tip. "Your soul was a part of my domain waaaaayyy before she got her grubby little hands on you! I didn't really think much about it when you got poached from me, but you turned out to be a super high-quality soul!" Aqua shouted before she got angry and threw her scepter on the ground. "I'm tired of getting yelled at for not defeating the Demon King already! Everyone I send there turns out to be a bunch of chumps, even when I give them super overpowered equipment and skills! You saved a world already, so save this one too!"

There was a whole lot to unpackage in that word vomit of complaints. What I picked out first was that my soul had apparently once been a part of her domain. Meaning… huh. So God existed in the real world, and it was Aqua. That… yeah, that explained some things.

"Hestia didn't take my soul. Someone else did. Do you know who?" I questioned, curious despite myself. Every time I world jumped so far, I had been taken to a white void. I had never died before. At least, not since I became a Gamer.

Aqua offered a thoroughly unhelpful shrug, "I dunno." The fact that she didn't care to look went unsaid. "If they're yoinking souls like they did with you, then it's probably one of the way higher-ups. You're better off not asking about them," Aqua added with a dismissive gesture of her hand.

That was worrying. I wasn't aware that gods had rankings -- I kinda just lumped them all in the same 'all powerful' category when they didn't seal off their power. So, I decided to drop the line of questioning. For now, at least. Even if I got the answers I wanted, I didn't really have a plan from there. Was I supposed to be pissed at the god that pulled me from my home and assassinated me to make the Gamer? Why would I when my life only got way better?

No, right now I only had a singular goal.

"I'm done being a hero. Tried it once, and it sucked. So much stress and dealing with idiots, and nothing ever really going your way… yeah, no, count me out," I refused, each word I said making Aqua more and more nervous. There was a look of pure panic in her eyes. "I'd like to go home, please. To Nirn and Hestia."

"H-hey now, we can work something out!" Aqua said, clearly panicking. She really had banked in on me going all hero and jumping in at a chance to save another world, huh? "I'm a pretty powerful goddess, you know? And I haven't sealed away my power at all!" I knew she was trying to get my interest, and as desperate as she sounded, it was working.

I tapped on the arm of the chair, considering that point. "What's your point?" I asked, wanting her to make an offer before I showed that she had have my attention.

"My point is that I can pull some strings for you," Aqua said, throwing on a smug look with the same ease she panicked. "The final battle for you went pretty bad, huh?" She questioned, a damn near sinister glint in her eye. "You won, but you died. Same with some other people. If the Demon Lord gets dealt with, then I'll put you back in your body on Nirn before the final battle."

Damn. "This is extortion, you know," I pointed out. She had me by the balls. That… that was exactly what I wanted. If she could follow through, then I could face Alduin again. And this time it would go down differently. It just really pissed me off that I would be dancing to her tune -- first she brings me here after death, and now the only way she'll help me is if I help her first? What a bitch.

"It's not like you don't get anything out of it," Aqua protested, seemingly offended. "I'll even let you get the usual Isekai Package deal -- one overpowered item that's yours to keep." She was trying to sweeten the deal to not piss me off, but I was still pissed off.

I had died. Again. Others died. And she was dangling the chance to undo it in front of my nose. All I had to do was jump through her hoops. The deal was…

By now, I understood you had to give to take, but the principle of it rubbed me the wrong way. It grated on me like sandpaper.

I didn't want to do it. To spite her.

"Does Hestia know that I'm here?" I asked, looking Aqua in the eyes. She seemed a bit caught off guard by the question, but she shook her head a second later.

"She doesn't. Sealing away her divinity really hampers her insight, and this is a realm outside of the one she's in. I took you the moment you died, so at best it might have registered that the falna that she gave you disappeared. But, going back in time would fix all of that," Aqua said, nudging me to do what she wanted.

Except it would all be clear the moment she updated my falna. Hestia had described updating like reading a book of my experiences, which she turned into points. It would be impossible for her not to learn about me battling out a Demon King in another world.

I just didn't like it. At all. For more reasons than just the circumstances. I didn't want to leave her behind. I did too much of that in Skyrim. Death, it would seem, really shook up my priorities.

Not to mention, Alduin…

A thought struck me, "Would it be possible to bring her with me?" I asked -- I used my system to do that last time, but I didn't seem to be able to do that now.

Again, Aqua shook her head. "Whatever was done with you is an exception, not the rule. If it was easy for gods to jump to different universes and worlds, it would happen way more often. I was able to pull you here because your soul originally belonged to a world under my domain. I might have been able to do it if you still had your falna, but you lost it when you died.”

Fuck.

“It’s not that bad -- time moves differently between worlds, so she won’t even notice that you’re gone!” Aqua offered, missing the point entirely.

My eyes narrowed, “You’ve never been in a relationship, have you?” I questioned and you’d think I punched her in the gut with how she folded in on herself the moment I said the words. She hunched over, arms curled around her stomach, and when she looked up at me, I saw there were tears in her eyes.

“I-It’s because I’m a goddess! We can’t have relationships! All that stuff was forbidden ages ago when there were demi-gods everywhere! It’s not my fault! I could get a boyfriend if I wanted one -- which I don’t!” Aqua pressed, leaving me unimpressed. You know, her antics were a lot more amusing in the show. Actually having to deal with her was an absolute pain in the ass. Especially when I didn’t see a way to get what I wanted without having to pay the piper.

I took in a breath and let it out as a sigh. I… I haven’t broken my promise to Hestia yet. It was just taking me a bit longer to keep it than I expected.

Still, I didn’t want to do it. Alduin had fucking sucked. Everything about it. I didn’t want to go through that again, and if I died again… then that would be it, wouldn’t it? Because I had my doubts about the Demon King.

It’s never specified how many poor saps Aqua sent to this world, but it was at least two. One of which received a completely OP weapon. Say we low ball it and she only sent about ten people to the world in total, each with an OP item. Yet, the Demon King was still alive and Aqua was still sending people to save the world. Maybe Aqua just kept picking idiots -- it would be in her character -- or maybe I was looking at another Alduin situation. I didn’t know.

And since I wasn’t going to pick Aqua as my OP item, and thus access to her resurrection abilities – because even with them, it would still be a net loss over all with her bottomed out luck stat…

I couldn’t die again. I might not be able to make it back to Hestia if I did.

“Hey… before I agree to anything, can you tell me if someone named Satou Kazuma has died?” I questioned, and Aqua tried to not look incredibly excited, but there were stars in her eyes.

She nodded, “He has. I’m very sorry if he was a friend of yours, but technically speaking, the one that died was from a different universe so there’s no reason to feel connected to him. This Kazuma was a total NEET.” Aqua tried to reassure me. That was good to know. Not that Kazuma was a NEET, but he was dead.

I had an idea.

“Did he die trying to save a girl?” I questioned, earning a pensive look from Aqua before she held up a hand and tilted it back and forth.

“Technically speaking, I guess…” She trailed off, the edges of her lips curling up into a smile.

“Then could you send him after me?” I questioned, catching her off guard with the request. “Two OP items are better than one, and with a little teamwork we should be able to make quick work of the Demon King.” I told her, and she seemed to consider it, tapping a finger against her chin.

Her head swayed back and forth as she made a thinking noise, “It’s not against the rules or anything, I guess…. So, you’ll do it?!” She questioned, and I swallowed another sigh.

I didn’t have much choice.

I nodded, “Alright. I’ll go, but the moment that the Demon King gets defeated, then I want the option to go home. I don’t want any technicalities that it wasn’t ‘me’ who got the final strike in or anything like that. I help in any way towards the Demon King’s demise, and I get to go home before the final battle with Alduin, got it?”

Aqua nodded like an excited puppy, “Got it!” She confirmed, giving me a thumbs up.

“I want it in writing,” I added and a piece of paper appeared before my eyes that floated down to my lap. I caught it and saw the agreement. Good. “And this is binding?” I questioned, earning another nod, and a mildly irritated look.

“I don’t know what kind of gods you’ve been hanging around with, but I’m perfectly respectable! You shouldn’t be so mistrustful of deities, you know. That’s how you end up reincarnated as a sea slug,” she warned. And considering how I planned to never die, I didn’t really see that being a problem for me.

I pressed my thumb in a little box that said press there. The piece of paper glowed, then it vanished, which I hoped meant that it was in effect. Perfect. Looking up, I saw the space between us was suddenly filled with papers. Aqua had a bag of chips in hand and a soda resting on the arm of her chair.

“This part usually lasts a little bit,” she defended, munching on a chip. “Go ahead and pick your OP item.” She said, gesturing to the stacks of paper, before brushing Cheeto dust out of her cleavage. I looked at the stacks of paper, a little overwhelmed, but I leaned forward and grabbed one.

There were a lot of choices. A whole lot of choices. Almost to the point of being too many. Magic wands that granted incredible power, swords that could cut a mountain in half, I saw the Sharingan in one, the ability to turn invisible and intangible. In the right situation, each and every single one of them was completely and utterly broken. They could be broken down into a few categories -- weapons, armor, and skills.

From there, they could be broken down further -- items that were stupidly OP right out the gate… or the ones that started off weaker but had scaling power. One sword could cut through a mountain, but another sword could cut time in the right hands.

The latter category had more appeal to me. The Hestia Armor was blessed with a falna, so it would forever scale up with me. In an ideal world, I could get a weapon to do the same. One that I could further enchant. I was growing stronger. Killing Alduin had proved that, even if it did come at too high of a cost. So, a weapon that would scale with me as I continued to grow stronger… that’s what I wanted.

I shifted through the pages, separating them into the possible and rejects. The latter was far larger than the former.

Eventually, one item caught my eye. “Soul Edge?” I questioned, recognizing it. I never really played the Soul Caliber games, but I still recognized the name. And it seemed to fit what I knew -- an ancient sword that became cursed from thousands of years of spilling blood, absorbing the hate of the slain until it became a cursed sword.

“Ah, that’s a good one!” Aqua remarked, slurping from her soda. “It says that it drives the wielder insane and gives them the urge to kill and destroy, but that’s just flavor text. It’s completely safe for you to wield. Even better, if you have a teammate that can read minds or something, they’ll see it so they’ll be all like ‘H-How is this possible?! Such rage and anger, yet he remains sane?! His mental fortitude is incredible!’ And stuff like that.”

I… I feel attacked right now. I know for a fact that I thought of that exact scenario at least… a dozen times way back in my early teens.

“Are you going to pick it?” Aqua questioned, and I inspected the paper. As much as it made me want to die a third time, Soul Edge fit the bill of what I was looking for. It was a sword that would grow in strength the more souls that it consumed and, to be blunt, I killed a lot of people. And animals too. Each soul going toward the sword would make it stronger while I could reserve the powerful souls for the Black Star for enchanting.

My armor… and now with Soul Edge? God, I was going to look so edgy. Wait, at this point, wasn’t I pretty much just Nightmare in appearance? Shit.

I sighed, “Yeah, let’s go with this one.” I said, holding up the slip of paper. And, just like that, the others vanished from existence and I suddenly found myself in the center of a beam of light. I was gently raised off my feet, heading to a bright light in the sky. Aqua waved goodbye, a chip in hand. “Just treat Kazuma as you normally would. And don’t tell him that anyone’s expecting him on the other side -- it’ll throw him off.”

“Okay!” Aqua agreed and right before I vanished, I’m pretty sure I head, “I’m going to get that promotion for sure!”

The second time I opened my eyes, I was standing up directly beneath a tree. The sun was shining overhead, sunlight streaming through the canopy of leaves. I was somewhere in a city.  There was a row of buildings directly before me, with people walking along the cobblestone path. Looking to my left and right, I saw kids playing around, a wagon pulled by a donkey that had a few adventurer types in it…

I was in a new world.

“D-Demon?!” I heard someone shout, and I looked over to see that it was one of those kids that had been playing around. Now it looked like he was pissing himself, along with his friends.

Demon? I looked down at myself -- I was still in my armor, I found. And my hands were full, in my left was the Black Star, which worryingly wasn’t burning my hand off anymore. In my other was the hilt of Soul Edge. A long broadsword nearly as tall as me that was shaped like a wedge. The hilt wasn’t exactly centered, it was more even with one edge of the sword, but protrusions of metal prevented it from truly running along the length. Though, more noticeable was the giant eyeball set around the crossguard of the sword -- so the demon conclusion was fair. I could admit that much.

The shout brought more attention to me, people freezing what they were doing to stop and stare…

Right.

I let my armor fade, revealing myself, forcing a hesitant smile to my lips, but it felt more like a grimace. “Sorry, about that -- I didn’t get a say in my armor's aesthetics, you know?” It was literally chaos made manifest. The kids took off running, but I was still earning some stink eye. I wasn’t in the mood for it at all.

Ignoring them, I planted the sword into the dirt next to me and took a seat at the base of the tree. My clothes were in decent enough condition -- no blood stains or lightning damage, so I guess they got cleaned when I was sent here. More pressingly, I looked at the Black Star.

For a terrible moment, I feared that I had lost Alduin's soul, but that fear was quickly put to rest when I felt how full the Star was. It was one of the most basic skills that an enchanter needed to judge the size and quality of a soul in a soul gem. The Star was near full to bursting with a soul so potent that I didn't have a classification for it. It was a Boss Soul. Alduin's soul.

"At least I have you," I muttered, wondering if I had my inventory or not. Did dying have consequences for the system? I didn't know. It didn't seem like it, because I was able to put the Star inside of my pocket dimension. A quick check proved that I had everything -- money, potions, my wagon, clothes, and so on. So, I was able to take the lot with me. That was good. It would have been a pain to start from scratch completely.

Actually…

Jericho

Level: 53

Title: High King of Skyrim

Health: 15,000

Magika: 10,000

Progress to next level: 150,000/300,000

Strength: 200 +551= 751

Endurance: 250 +850= 1,100

Dexterity: 175 +466= 641

Intelligence: 150 +302= 452

Sense: 200 +640= 840

Ahh… I leveled up. I guess I managed to do that before I kicked the bucket. And weren't my stats a little insane right now? Endurance had broken into the thousands. Strength and Sense weren't far behind either. It was almost insane to think about -- I was only a level 3 according to the Danmachi system. I had another three levels to go to reach the most common peak of level 6. And there were those that went beyond it. What in the hell would their stats look like? What would mine be by the time I hit level 6?

"I'm going to have to enchant more armor," I remarked, resting my head against the tree, and felt… the hair bun that Hestia had made. I didn't care for it -- only a chosen few could pull off a man bun, and I don't think I qualified. But it was the last thing she had done before Helgen went to hell. So, I guess I was stuck with it. For now at least. Until I got back to her and she did something else with my hair.

Dismissing the window, I closed my eyes and waited for Kazuma to show up.

I didn't have to wait long.

Kazuma appeared out of thin air dressed in a green and black tracksuit. His hair was a messy brown, and the moment he opened his eyes, I saw that they were an emerald green. He gaped at his surroundings. "Woah… woah, it really is a parallel world!" He exclaimed, taking a step forward, revealing Aqua who stared at the ground behind him, her arms limp at her sides. Her expression could best be described as utter despair.

"Yeah, it is," I confirmed as I stood up, bringing Kazuma's attention to me. With each inch I rose, I could see him growing more and more self-conscious. "Welcome to Axel, the beginners town for adventuer’s-"

"Jericho!" Aqua cried, launching herself at me. She fell to her knees as she clutched at my shirt, looking up at me with an expression of anguish. "You gotta defeat the Demon King! He kidnapped me! This has gotta be illegal, right? Jericho? Jericho!" She wailed, hurrying her head against my leg as she cried.

Kazuma sputtered, "W- it wasn't kidnapping! Ok, don't listen to her!"

I shook my head, "It's fine." I dismissed the topic easily enough that it gave Kazuma some pause.

He squinted up at me, "You said that this was a starting town? And you know it's a parallel world? Are you some kind exposition character to guide me on my way?!" Kazuma questioned, earning a slow blink from me. Ah, well, I guess I could see how he came to that conclusion. But that really sounded like something you shouldn't say out loud.

"Eh, sorta, I guess," I shrugged, ignoring the looks that we were getting. "I'm in the same boat as you -- but I already saved a world from being annihilated. I ended up dying in the process, though." I admitted. Kazuma's jaw dropped, but before he could say anything, I continued. "It's why I got picked to defeat the Demon King. Except…"

Kazuma leaned forward, and Aqua peeked up at me.

"I'm leaving it to you," I told him, jabbing a finger against his chest.

"Eh?" Kazuma uttered, blinking at me. I saw the exact moment that it clicked into place. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE LEAVING THE DEMON KING TO ME?!" That was an amusing reaction.

Aqua was quick to join in, "You can't do that-"

"Yeah, I can," I cut her off. "The deal was that I helped defeat the Demon King and I'm going to do exactly that. I'll help Kazuma defeat him." There was a tweet from the producer of Konosuba that I was basing the entire plan on. He had said that without Aqua, Darkness, and Megumin, Kazuma would have defeated the Demon King in a couple of months. The show even made a point of it -- Kazuma was proven to be fairly competent when working with other groups, and where competence failed, his luck stat pulled up the slack.

Aqua sputtered, but I ignored her. Honestly I wasn't too interested in her complaining to me about the horrors of being ripped from your home by a person you didn't know, to complete a task you didn't want to get back home.

"Why me?" Kazuma questioned, "Is there a reason you can't do it? Did you take some kind of crippling injury during the battle to save the world? Is there a reason you're trusting me to save the world?" He questioned, and it seemed that the caution had slipped because now he was openly looking up to me.

I smiled ever so slightly, reaching out to place a hand on his shoulder, "Because," I began, giving it a gentle squeeze as a look of amazement and awe. "I don't want to."

Wow -- as fast as his hopes soared, they crashed down even faster. I was lucky that I had leveled up or that stink eye he was giving me could have done some damage.

"Plus, this way you get to have your own kick-ass adventure. Would you really want to be in my shadow?" I questioned, and the stink eye got way worse. I'm guessing because the point had landed. "So, I'll support you from the shadows. Bankroll your adventures, help you out on the occasional quest if you need it. I can't give you my OP item since it'll drive anyone who tries to wield it insane, but I have some skills that can let you skip the starter equipment stage."

And just like that, I was in his good graces again.

He bowed at the waist, "Thank you for your sponsorship, senpai!"

Sponsor, huh? Sounded about right. I had plenty of money -- a glance told me that the coinage had converted to this world's currency, so I was still rich. And I had a few items that would help replace an OP item. I could make more money and replace them easily enough. I wish I had my old Ebony sword, but I had dropped it during the battle with Alduin.

"Er, Senpai," Kazuma began, sparing a glance at Aqua. "What should we do about her?"

I looked down to find Aqua in the fetal position, rocking back and forth as she had a breakdown, and I had exactly zero pity for her.

Still, "She should come with us. There's a Guild nearby, I think, and we can register there." At least that was the plan, but with my expanded vision I saw a group of people coming around the corner, their weapons drawn. I turned to look at them to see that they all had matching clothing and armor. Guards?

I watched them approach, wondering where the fire was, right up until they leveled their spears in our direction.

"There have been reports of a demon appearing? And a kidnapping?! Explain yourselves!" A guard demanded, the good dozen of them making a semi-circle around us. Kazuma instantly surrendered, dropping to his knees and putting his hands in the air. I don't even think Aqua noticed the commotion.

I sighed as I put my hands in the air as well.

I could endure this. Just for a little bit. It might take Kazuma a few months to defeat the Demon King, but… if it meant it was a sure hit when it came to getting back to Hestia and Lili, then I could swallow that bitter pill. In the meantime, I could work on myself, improve my sorely lacking skills, and prepare for round 2 with Alduin.

I would get back to them. One way or another.

...

So begins the Konosuba run. I'm intending for a smaller jump this go around, but I've said that about Danmachi and Skyrim, so who knows how long it's going to last for. But, rather than Jericho taking the role of the protagonist, he's the retired mentor character.

I really want to work on my comedy with this jump, because I think it's where I'm weakest when it comes to writing. Rather than gag comedy, I'm aiming for more situational comedy, which is what Konosuba does best, and with a diverse cast, there's going to be plenty of chances to work with it. So, let me know what you think!

Comments

Kyle Reese

Yes I love konosuba kazuma is some guaranteed comedy

DorbenRS

Ooh, this is a change! I think I'll enjoy it.

R754

Eh... Didn't aqua literally saved his life? And give him another chance where he failed? I get he is in bad mood but he is being an asshole here. I guess its in character for him when hestia isn't here.

IdeasGuy

He is being an asshole, but so is Aqua. From Jericho's perspective, Aqua is keeping him hostage until he kills the Demon King. So, to him, it's less that she's giving him a a second chance and more of her going 'you have to do this for me if you ever want to see your loved ones again.'

Mioismoe

Hah! I was right on my guess last chapter.

Brandon Hunt

Soooooo......double the soul the the price of one????