Diary of my Footboy #Mindfucked- Part 8 (Patreon)

Hello! So the diary continues! This is the aftermath of the 2 sessions and future sessions we have together so lots more to read..... 

09/02/2021

Well the day has arrived! A week after confirming it with Mistress, and two weeks after the back-to-back sessions, the ‘informal chat’ session has happened. The idea for it started to develop from two things really - firstly was my approach to our sessions; not so much thinking of specific things to ask Mistress that we could do during them but more about the structure or shape they could take…what would be an interesting experiment for Mistress? What would be different? Secondly was after the first story time with Anunna and we were chatting on the video call, just having fun and giggles…perhaps with the odd trigger or two thrown in! After this I started to think how I would love just spending time chatting with Mistress in this way, talking about anything and just having a laugh as good friends. If she decided to stir the waters in any way during this chat then that would be her prerogative of course!

We started chatting in the morning as we do often, not even about the session but just about various things. The session was on my mind of course as it has been for the last number of days, with this one I was even less sure what to expect in a way – what triggers would Mistress decide to use on me, if any? Would she bring me into trance? I had no idea! These ideas were floating around my head, and I’m sure Mistress knew it; she knows I really enjoy not knowing if or when something will happen, and not knowing where it will go if it does. Still can’t quite put my finger on why I enjoy that so much – an expression of how much Mistress can affect me, perhaps.

After a bit of chatting she caught me with a few noted and an erotic trigger, which felt wonderful as it always does…since the back-to-back sessions these things have become even more profound and engrained in me. I love it. Then in another example of how powerful her words and effect on me can be even if it’s not an implanted suggestion, she brought up the idea of using me as her footstool. This was an amazing thought, to be so deeply under that my reality for that time is to be somewhere that Mistress can use to rest her feet on. Wow. She has had me experience this on a couple of occasions while she has had me under and when I listen to my custom track a very similar experience happens then too. So even if it isn’t something she has ‘officially’ implanted in me, doubtless the associated recollections of those past experiences and the powerful influence her feet have on me all come into play to make such things she says just as potent as anything else. These are all thoughts I have had retrospectively of course, as at the time I was far too focussed on the pleasurable sensations!

And so we carried on chatting periodically throughout the day. Unlike the previous sessions I haven’t really had the feeling that Mistress might have been ‘preparing’ me for something she is going to do, but I just put that down to the nature of the session this time. In some ways I’ve thought that session might not have even been the right term for it, thinking of it as much more informal. This was of course just my thinking, what Mistress thought and had planned I would not know until the event occurred.

In the mid-afternoon she asked me what time the session was, checking if it was at 8.30pm. Now I’m quite meticulous when it comes to logging and keeping appointments, so even though the fact that it had been arranged for 6pm immediately sprang into my mind, it still made me think and have to check this was so. Mistress’ next message made me see that I had walked into another mindfuck, but little did I know there was more to come. After this she started teasing me with the idea of actually making me wait until 8.30pm for the session; I knew this wasn’t the kind of mindfuck where she was trying to confuse me about details and make me think something particular that she wanted, I knew that she was implying she could actually instruct me to wait…and I knew I would do it if that happened. There’s no way I wouldn’t. She carried on teasing me and drawing it out, switching back and forth between the times she said she would see me. Again I realised just how many ways she has to mindfuck me now, how open my mind is to her to allow them to happen. My confusion this time didn’t come from doubting if the session had been originally set for 6pm, but from not knowing whether or not Mistress was serious about her intention to actually make me wait the extra two and a half hours. I really didn’t know if she was pulling my leg, she kept saying ‘see you at 6’ and ‘see you at half 8’ and I could only go along with it each time. It didn’t last very long, but she managed to reel me in completely. It is so easy for her to mindfuck me now…and she must have picked up on the fact I would be thinking of this as she said we could discuss that exact topic during the session. We chatted a little bit longer, and again I knew that if she were to genuinely instruct me to wait that extra amount of time I would do so; it would be such a slow two and a half hours, but it would also be Mistress’ way of toying with me more, and I know also that I would love that.

I was really excited by the time that 6pm arrived; I still didn’t know what to expect really but I was so looking forward to it. With the kind of session we had arranged I was sat more casually than I have been on previous occasions, but still ready to go and with the familiar excited butterflies. Unfortunately in the first few minutes we were beset by technical issues of one form or another; we both logged on to the Discord private room and I couldn’t get a picture of Mistress, I switched to mobile, and she couldn’t see me because my phone’s front camera isn’t working for some reason…just bloody typical really! In a way I suppose it was lucky that we weren’t doing a more ‘formal’ sort of session with these issues happening, and at least they’d never happened any other time. We eventually resolved to switch to Skype and see if that would work, but we were still in communication on Discord. We could hear each other perfectly, and Mistress could still see me…and she certainly took advantage of that – while I was trying to straighten things out she instructed me to snap my fingers. When she instructs me to do this it is an undeniable effect, like any other trigger she uses, but the fact that it is my own physical action that causes the pleasure to start running through me is so riveting. And run through me it did. With trying to sort all the technical stuff out it probably didn’t take as much of an immediate grip as it might have normally…but Mistress dealt with that by dropping in a few more triggers to increase the pleasurable sensations. Whether it was because she knew the finger snapping hadn’t hit me as hard as normal or she was simply toying with me as she watched me try to sort everything out, I don’t know.

And so I finally managed to get it sorted, following the Skype link that Mistress had sent me and establishing a call in which we could both see and hear each other. Hooray! The feelings of pleasure were with still with me and now that I wasn’t having to focus on establishing everything they started to become more prominent, I could allow them to take over. And of course now that everything was set up it meant I could see Mistress properly for the first time…and she was wearing a red cardigan. As this dawned on me she took the time to specifically draw my attention to it, and right on cue I was brought to that intense edged state, right on the point of an orgasm but unable to do so without Mistress’ permission. So the session had only just gotten underway, and I was already flooded with pleasurable sensations! Mistress instructed me that I would have to wait until quarter past the hour to have my release, which is something she has done with me before – prolonging my pleasure, drawing out that state of near orgasm, playing with me in the way she likes. This time though there was an extra element to it…not long after she just kept constantly triggering me, and I mean constantly. She just flooded me with words, bombarding me and watching the effects take me over. It felt amazing, it was like wave upon wave of pleasure just beating down on me constantly in the build up to my release, filling me up entirely. Had I not been waiting for a specific time to arrive I think I would have become even more lost in those sensations than I did, just Mistress’ voice and the effects she was creating. When the time came the orgasm was strong; the feelings rushing out of me powerfully making me squirm and quiver, and their sensations lingering and tingling until the effect of all Mistress’ words started to subside.

So although I know that started at quarter past I’m not quite sure how long the whole thing took from there. The intense way that the feelings of pleasure had washed over left me feeling a bit out of it in the best kind of way. A few things dawned on me at this point as I was gathering my thoughts – the first was again how the power of Mistress’ words can get me even if they are not triggers that she has ‘officially’ implanted. As well as the pleasure inducing triggers, she also said ‘melty’ and ‘gooey’ several times, and they did affect me. On previous occasions I have described how things Mistress has done or said made me feel using these words, and so really it was almost like things coming full circle as she had taken it onboard and was able to use it. As I’ve often wondered before perhaps it is the power of associated feelings of past experiences that help make it so potent…or in this case just the fact that she said them whilst flooding me with pleasurable triggers which was helping them to sink into my open mind. The second thing that struck me was that the session had already gone further and done more in terms of triggers than I think I had expected it to. Perhaps I was comparing more to the times when Mistress has triggered me on video outside of an actual session…but those were all on a public call, this was just the two of us, however informal we might have talked about it being. It certainly wasn’t like that – no need to be discreet or covert when she has me exactly where she wants me and can play with me exactly how she sees fit!

So from there we started the actual chat part of the proceedings, although I still wasn’t very coherent! Clearly Mistress knew this and was prompting me to speak regardless, watching and noting all my reactions, and it is fun when she does that. Her effect on me can be so varied and so nuanced, and I adore it. In the week leading up to the session there were a couple of topics she had asked me to remind her about for discussion, and I had made of small list of things overall, and she was prompting me for something from that. The first topic was something that lead on from the previous really – during the build-up I had mentioned specifically what my work shifts would be in relation to the session, at first I was off the day after but then it turned out I would be working. This information was given to Mistress unprompted which subsequently raised the question of why I felt compelled to tell her at all. Well…I can’t deny that there is a thrill in being triggered while I’m at work, of that public element to everything. The fact that Mistress’ influence on me is strong that whatever she chooses to do is undeniable no matter where I am is very appealing. Perhaps it stems back to my BDSM background; although playing in public in that scenario was far more out of necessity because of how equipment was set up, maybe it helped develop my liking for being ‘on display’ when combined with the sort of feelings I just mentioned.

The second topic that Mistress wanted me to bring up during the chat was about one of our favourite subjects…mindfucks. Something specific this time too, that came about when she asked me to remind her about the first topic. After bringing up that she wished me to remind her about it she went on to use the phrase ‘don’t forget’, which is a completely innocuous phrase by itself. But based on things that have happened in the past I couldn’t really be sure if my leg was being pulled or not, and I said as much. We both found it quite amusing that it had been a genuine request which I had interpreted in that way, but then it got me thinking about the nature of mindfucks. Had I really started to see them everywhere, even when there weren’t any? It seems that I had! This in itself is a pretty strong mindfuck, that I was seeing them and in effect mindfucking myself…creating that sort of feeling even when Mistress hadn’t actually intended it. Or perhaps she had to some degree, maybe this was all playing right into her hands. Something else I shall never know. Wow. So how much of this exact instance was intentional I cannot say…but this idea of a ‘meta-mindfuck’ where I start to see them (or is that create them?) myself is not only an interesting interpretation of our work together but a very exciting prospect too.

We talked about this a bit, but I think Mistress used her pocket watch on me while I was telling her something. I remember losing my train of thought on the topic and having to search to find it again…I was referring to details I had listed in the previous diary and then it was only after that popped back into my head that I was able to carry on. I think Mistress used the scent trigger on me as well; though I lost my train of thought there was a feeling of calmness and lightly drifting, the effect of feeling her feet gently closing around my face. The fact that Mistress can so easily take me under like that is exhilarating, that I might literally be caught mid-sentence and just have no other option but to sink down. Even the thought of it now gives me a pleasurable shiver.

Discussing and dissecting the nature of the mindfucks is always fun; Mistress and I have talked about it in detail over text, but we haven’t often talked about them in voice without one kind of being in progress in the context of a session. I reiterated what I had outlined in the previous diary about how subtle they can be now, how they have progressed beyond just making me forget something that happened in a session. This is just the view from my perspective, of course…perhaps Mistress had always planned this direction for things, or at least realised at a lot sooner than me how she could sway me and toy with my mind, getting me to question or believe something in particular. This was very much the case with the time mindfuck that happened earlier in the day, and as we talked about that her joy at causing such an effect was really evident! It was fun seeing her laugh and smile with glee as I described how it had all affected me and made me feel, which in turn made me glow as well. Something else that made me glow was when Mistress informed me of her intention to put the first diary I wrote up as a post on Patreon. The idea had been mentioned briefly, but now it had been properly put on the table. I just love the idea of it being out there – and like many things I have to consider what it is about it that appeals to me. Perhaps on one level it relates to the ‘on display’ element I was talking about before, but really to me it represents Mistress’ investment in me and our journey together, and it makes me feel really valued.

Something that happened not long after this, that I hadn’t considered at all, was that Mistress used the restraint trigger on me, instantly bringing back my full memory of the last session that she had conditioned me to forget. She had made it so that all I could remember of that session was the extremely intense mind-blowing orgasm that came at the end, but nothing else. So I had this memory alone of events and had been fixating on it considering just how intense that release was! In the past when Mistress has done this to me I have forgotten everything that occurred and when it has come back the full pleasurable rush of the releases I experienced came back to me along with the memories. This time was a little different – when I heard the trigger I was overcome with a pleasurable wave washing over me, but not a release, and not quite as intense as the previous times. Looking back on it now I’m thinking it was perhaps because I had retained the memory of the orgasm, and so it was everything else that took hold of me in that moment. Perhaps it was the effect of what transpired before the orgasm itself, in which Mistress held me in a state of orgasmic pleasure for a whole half hour! A full thirty minutes on the edge, needing to cum and orgasm and not being able to…it certainly puts the few minutes I had to wait until quarter past into perspective! And not only that, unlike some of the times when Mistress toys with me over text and just messages periodically, with this being in a session she was constantly there and constantly stoking the fires, fuelling my arousal and building me to that ultimate release. I can picture her vividly, sat watching me writhe and shudder as the waves of pleasure just radiated through me. It was a really intense and pleasurable experience, and I wouldn’t have been aware of the time had Mistress not being counting it down, teasing me and throwing in particular words to make me more and more aroused. My body was completely wracked with it, I now understand why the orgasm I experienced at the end of the session was so incredibly powerful, the most powerful I had ever experienced, in fact…the pleasure and build up and been so beautifully drawn out and so wonderfully intense that every particle of my being was devoted to it. Dear God, how absolutely incredible that is.

Of course these are my own reflections on the events since my memory of them has come back. I’m not quite sure how to describe it…like a light bulb has suddenly popped on in your mind and the new light lets you see things that you couldn’t before? When the stimulus for the memories coming back is not one that you yourself have initiated, like finding an old picture and remembering the event it shows you, for instance…it feels a little external if that is the right word, although the memories are of things I myself have done. I take time to explore them as if I was reading a book for the first time, and as with everything else I just adore how Mistress can affect me in this way, holding the key for my own memories and not turning it in the lock until she wishes to. These sorts of reflections make me think about how far Mistress and I have come in our dynamic in the time we have been working together, of how many things we have experienced and how many changes have taken place. And of course the changes have not just been in terms of hypnotic triggers, there have also been notable changes in myself and my outlook, most notably my confidence and the fact that I’m less shy now. We talked about this, in fact Mistress asked me specific questions about it and took notes in her book. Just like with the Patreon post it makes me feel so valued and special that Mistress has and means to continue dedicating her time and effort into everything that we have. I absolutely love it and long may it continue!

Throughout the course of all these discussions Mistress periodically kept fixating me with her pocket watch, making me go all blank and hypnotised for as long as she dangled it front of me. A few times I could tell she was holding it ready from the gentle rattle of the chain, and so was on edge wondering when it would appear and feeling wonderful when it did. The way that watch can just take me completely is incredible, such a feeling, my focus channelling right onto it as everything else drifts away except that and Mistress’ voice. Between that and her feet I am completely under her spell! The climax of this informal session ended up being just that…another climax. But not only that – recreating the mind-blowing orgasm from the end of our previous session! That was undoubtedly one of the most incredible experiences of my life; the way every part of me was flooded, was devoted to that pleasure. And the intensity…energy being drawn from my whole body and concentrated into a huge and powerful release. And that was coming again! Mistress was just sat observing me, watching the whole thing unfold as the pleasure built, slowly becoming more intense as we made our way to another time trigger to set it off. The pleasure continued to build, and the intensity continued to grow, until at the appropriate time there was the most incredible release. Mistress was just sat back in her chair watching me shake and convulse with pleasure, I doubled up as it overtook me again, everything else dissolving away except the ultimate orgasmic bliss. Surging pleasure, pulsing through me intensely and driving everything else away for those moments. One long explosion of pleasurable sensations, which like before continued to run through me even after the main release started to subside. The session concluded not long afterwards; Mistress took the time to enjoy my spaciness and lack of coherence as I came around from what I had just experienced. I could feel the glee and I loved that it had made her happy, all just incredible feelings.

And so that was our ‘informal’ session. What a fun and interesting experience it was! Different to the previous sessions that we’ve had together, as I wasn’t in hypnosis (much!), but I was still completely in the palm of Mistress’ hand throughout the whole thing. This gave the whole thing a different kind of flavour, as there was the sort of unexpected element of not knowing when or indeed if something would happen during the discourse. But how exciting it was! The variety of triggers and other effects Mistress has implanted in me came to the fore as she was able to use them, and it was my conscious and aware self that was reacting to them. As I’ve often stated, the ease with which she can affect me with all these things is just wonderful, it really appeals to me and thrills me on a level only a few months ago I wasn’t even aware of. What a journey! It was also wonderful to just chat and talk and laugh with Mistress as well, I enjoyed that as much as everything else. She was taking various notes throughout the course of events…storing all the details for future use, no doubt! And that watch! She took me with it a few times and it was just instant, I dropped each time she showed it to me and was just lost in it and her words. It’s such an impactful thing, and it’s happened in such a short time as well…but I love it!

I definitely think there will be another session of this kind in the future as it was really fun and enjoyable, and I look forward to losing my train of thought again!

I hope you continue to enjoy the hypnotic adventures of this thoroughly mind fucked foot boy!

Chanel

P.s the photo is just me messing around in Canva hope you like it!