Selfportraits (Patreon)

I'm in Berlin now)

When I came here, only 3 days out of 7 were fully planned. And despite the fact that I was going to work, I was not upset by such a free schedule) I went without any expectations.

And here I am and every day is full of plans)

I already had time:

- to visit the S-O Berlin gallery at the exhibition of the incredible Marie Ellen Mark.

(It was so impressive and emotional. I restrained myself several times so as not to cry - her projects were so deep for me. Everything was perfect there - composition, emotions, meaning. I even sometimes did not believe that this was a documentary photo. I was also in delighted by how many people were at the exhibition and how long the audience stood next to each photo and looked at it. I will come to Berlin more often even if there is no work just for exhibitions, inspiration, creative people)

- attended the presentation of the latest issue of my favorite magazine "The Opera"

(It is very interesting that this magazine has been a dream for me since 2018, when I did not even think of shooting nude. Then I met this magazine in Berlin in one of the bookstores and was simply delighted... and this time the founder himself, seeing that I was in Berlin, he wrote to me and invited me to a presentation and get to know him in person. Magic?)

- attend two workshops with Alexander Stoyanov 

(The first group was incredible - everyone is so sweet, creative, deep. I really felt useful that we were creating art and it was so inspiring to me. The first day was very comfortable, deep and artistic.

The second day was terrible. Other people, two of whom just made me feel like some kind of meat. Their behavior, their objectifying phrases about the female body - it was disgusting. I really wanted to go, but it wouldn't have been polite to the other good photographers at this workshop. So I tried to build a wall in my head and not take it to heart. But after the workshop I just got drunk on whiskey with Alex.

Two completely opposite workshops in my opinion. And I could have already decided not to be a model anymore after this experience with nasty photographers, but thanks to the first day, I just melt - I want to be involved in art, I want to help others realize their ideas in photography, I feel. such a fulfillment from that (but only when there is real respect for each other and a desire to create and not just look at a naked body))

- I shot with two incredibly deep photographers who accidentally offered me a shoot.

(I like so much that in Berlin people consider photography as something deeper than just a picture, they think more about an idea. And when I get rejected for references to shooting books or photos of famous photographers of the 20th century who created projects - my heart melts. I really don't care about technical component of a photography (how well he/she shoot).... it is more important  the depth of his idea, what he wants to portray is important to me. And this inspires me to continue shooting with other photographers. Because so far I have met a lot of such people in Berlin in such a short period of time.)

There are 3 more days ahead and a lot of filming, meetings and plans - and I have already fallen in love with Berlin and the people who live here. And it is interesting that everything is put together like a puzzle. I drove almost without plans, and they were created by themselves in 1 day.

I love everyone, I hug everyone) Have a nice day, and I ran to help people create art)