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Polina
A couple of days ago I had a very strange condition. I woke up and felt that I "don't care". I felt nothing inside, no emotions, no sensations and desires, there were almost no thoughts. I was completely apathetic.
It would seem nothing strange, I just woke up without a mood. But usually such a mood of mine is reinforced by sadness or anger or fear - there is some basic emotion that controls me. And here there is nothing at all. At first I was a little embarrassed because I did not understand what had happened, my relatives were worried about my condition. But in half a day I started to simply accept this state and it became quite interesting to me. Not feeling anything and not wanting anything - if this is called real apathy, then I liked it. It seems that it was a day of continuous meditation.
Next morning I woke up more motivated with desires and ideas. It was fun, but I understand that if that state stayed with me for a long time, then it would be possible to fall into real depression.
Has this ever happened to you? So that simply inside "nothing" is not felt and desired?