Handbook of Erotic Fantasy: Prowess (Patreon)

They say that there are hundreds of verses and dozens of regional variations among the leshy diaspora. Chances are you’ve heard (or even made up) a few yourself. Recorded here is the version popularized by Elvis Parsley circa 1 B6E.

What do you do with a horny firbolg?
What do you do with a horny firbolg?
What do you do with a horny firbolg?
If you are a veggie?

Butter her up like a baked potato,
Butter her up like a baked potato,
Butter her up like a baked potato,
Because you’re a veggie!

Kale, hay, and toss that salad,
Kale, hay, and toss that salad,
Kale, hay, and toss that salad,
Then she’ll eat her veggies.

Tie her ankles to a six-foot trellis,
Tie her ankles to a six-foot trellis,
Tie her ankles to a six-foot trellis,
Because you’re a veggie!

REFRAIN

Fill her fuller than a stuffed zucchini,
Fill her fuller than a stuffed zucchini,
Fill her fuller than a stuffed zucchini,
Because you’re a veggie!

REFRAIN

Tickle her titties with a silken cornhusk,
Tickle her titties with a silken cornhusk,
Tickle her titties with a silken cornhusk,
Because you’re a veggie!

REFAIN

Make her edge until she orders vegan,
Make her edge until she orders vegan,
Make her edge until she orders vegan,
Because you’re a veggie!

REFRAIN X 2