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Epilogue Proposal (Patreon)

Published:
2021-06-12 06:34:29
Imported:
2021-06

Content

SPOILERS FOR FINAL CHAPTER
Apologies that I am feeling long-winded about this. Please read below for context about this poll.

I have received a lot of feedback requesting I write one last epilogue chapter for Wizard Tournament. I would be happy to do so if everyone still agrees that it is necessary, but I would ask that you first hear me out:

On the ending. I feel I missed the mark and the intended reception of the very end of the last chapter. I am going to attempt to make a few very minor edits to the last chapter which I hope will discourage interpretations that I didn't intend. I would also like to build a stronger foundation for this final scene. I was aiming for "surprised but understanding after realizing the earlier hints" but instead it seems many readers have experienced "shocked and betrayed." This wish will not create quite the ruined hellscape of misery and suffering that I think some readers rightfully fear.

My ending was absolutely not "Peter just fuckin' kills everyone, lol. Bet you didn't see THAT coming! Muwhahaha!" If that was how you read the final chapter I have failed you as an author. I too would be upset if I thought that's what happened. Please keep in mind I have already teased the proposed sequel as an "Action/Adventure involving many of the same characters." How could I do that if I just killed everyone but Peter?? (again, still, this is my mistake)

So I will try to do some mending while keeping changes to published chapters as minimal as possible (it would be unfair to burden readers with hours of extra reading to undo my mistake, and even if I fixed things perfectly with massive rewrites that chance to absorb it properly the first time will have been lost).

Additionally, I will be publishing a first draft of Chapter One of my proposed sequel this weekend. That is already in the works, and I believe much of the information/closure readers are pleading for will be contained therein. If a different writing project wins next week's poll, perhaps I can massage that chapter into an epilogue instead.

Now that you've heard me out, please vote your conscience below. Only one vote.

Comments

Daniel Sanchez

I feel like I should clarify that I thought the ending sucked, but mostly because the story so far has been about building expectations and then hitting you with a sneaky undercut. This time it just built up the obvious ending, and then did it in what feels like a really 'rocks fall, every interesting character dies because they can't live without magic' kind of way. Like, sure, the hints were there, but it seemed too obvious, so it couldn't be true, but then it was. I don't know if that makes any sense, but whatever. Normally the story kept me guessing, so it was incredibly underwhelming to have it not end like that.

Anonymous

I'd say the sequel then minor changes THEN reassessing the epilogue. Anyone who votes for the final option can shove it and leave now 😁

Anonymous

I feel it was a good ending as is, but more clarity could have been well received. A little more depth on the resolution than Draevin in white hot fire, for instance. The hints at the nature of the conflux and how it resolves wishes helped immensely, but ultimately this being the only wish we've seen in action and what it was, can cause confusion regarding races with vital mana. I don't think changes are necessary, just a much needed epilogue as the final chapter was uncharacteristically short lol. Also please continue with the sequel as well.

Anonymous

I was saddened by the ending, but not too shocked. I was kinda hoping Peter would pull some kind of genius move to fundamentally change the balance of power without too much devastation, but wasn't unbelievably surprised based on the lore and hints. I do want an epilogue, just because it feels like the story is stuck on a cliffhanger, and I want to see how exactly things have changed and what the wider effects were. What happened with Tel'Andrid? What happens to the main characters? Oh god, what happened to Kot?

Anonymous

That last one. LOL. brutal.

Anonymous
>>61718363

No this is fairly spot on I'd say. The ending was definitely motivated and appropriately foreshadowed. The problem is moreso that the tone of the story, lessons learned, and comradery built in the main cast is strongly undercut by the way the story ends with no real emotional payout for their loss. Nobody gained anything. Nothing was built from it. And seeing that coming and how much everyone was growing, it builds a sense of real expectation that something more clever or interesting was on the way. Then there was just loss and none of that development mattered.

Merodac

I mean... I want an epilogue, but more because i enjoy reading your chapters than because i think it is needed... And i don't think it's "Peter killed everyone lololol" but more the ruthlessness. How can he say "i did not think it was you who tried to kill me" while at the same time kill Draevin without hesitation? Yes, there are perfect explanations, it still feels out of character ...

Danielv123

Personally, I think the final chapter could have some touching up on, specifically making it seem less like everyone dies and maybe more about how they experience the lack of magic, but I don't feel like there should be an epilogue. I think the ending was properly foreshadowed, and everything that happens after is perfect to be explained in a sequel. As long as we mostly know who lives and who dies of the main characters everything else is irrelevant.

jdfister
>>61718563

As to the final chapter being uncharacteristically short, it was perfectly average as far as word count, but perhaps it merely "felt" short. I am starting to feel at this point that a second draft of the final chapter might be in order. Thank you for this missing piece: communicating that everyone isn't dying. My desire to heighten the drama with Draevin believing he was dying perhaps did more harm than good...

jdfister
>>61719211

I have to agree that this appearance of Peter having killed (or even attempted to kill) Draevin&friends absolutely needs to change. It was not my intention that readers would interpret Peter as having put his close friends lives in danger by granting his wish. I have some ideas on how to mitigate this specific issue. Thank you for the feedback.

jdfister
>>61719763

Thank you, Daniel. I believe part of what is causing such consternation is this belief that everyone is dying. I (foolishly) believed the uncertainty about the fates of Peter's friends would increase the emotional impact of the (to Draevin at least) unexpected wish. I thought, "Where else could I believably jeopardize the lives of the character but in the gap between novels." I honestly can't say how I didn't foresee that this otherwise minor move to make Draevin believe that everyone (including himself) was dying as he passed out might ALSO MAKE READERS BELIEVE THE SAME!! I didn't do enough to provide readers the knowledge of Conflux mechanics or Peter's intentions to understand that this wasn't actually happening, despite Draevin's perception to the contrary. There are a number of ways of fixing this that come to mind, some better than others. I will try to come up with the best revision which requires the least change and make this adjustment before releasing the forthcoming sequel write-up.

Anonymous

I'm perfectly fine with ending as is, it's just that personally as a reader, I like having closure. I'm not a big fan of having endings be left open to interpretation.

Anonymous

Personally, I loved the ending as is. There were plenty of hints towards Peters true nature and though I was a little surprised he opted to remove all magic (unsure if sanguinomancy was affected though), but it wasn't out of the blue. It fit with Peters personality and really underlines that he all that he did out of spite of the established society. The open ending allowed people to interpreted it as they wanted, as there is plenty of arguments for and against genocide. Though some of the stronger arguments against it was in Patreon exclusive documents (specifically the part about sea nymphs in the race doc.) All in all, the best story I've ever read. Good job JD, buy yourself a cake, you've earned it.

Anonymous

I don’t think an epilogue OR changes are necessary, but hear me out. The reason that you thought it would be obvious people didn’t die is because you mentioned that it would be largely the same cast in the sequel, and that Peter wouldn’t want to do that to his friends. The latter was called into question a little bit by his ruthlessness against Draevin in their match, and the former was from supplementary information. I think that everything should be left exactly as is, but then when this masterpiece is published, instead of an epilogue, you include a PROLOGUE of the sequel with it at the end. That may seem like semantics, but I think it leaves the integrity of the ending intact.

Anonymous

Darn, my phone battery died after I typed out everything, so I'll make this a little shorter. While I didn't expect Peter to be quite so brutal in his final decision, it wasn't exactly out of character for him, so no problem there for me. The knowledge of knowing that there's a sequel in the works with many of the same characters does change the tone of the ending, as it did come off as ambiguous as to how many of the characters survived, at least to me. However, as the author, it's your choice as to how you want people to view the ending, though keep in mind whether or not you want people to predicate their interpretation of the ending on the meta-knowledge that there's intended to be more in a different book.

CW

The final chapter left me with the question of: "Is mostly everyone dead, or did most everyone survive". I feel like some slight editing to drive us readers to the proper answer would be a great idea. But with a sequel in the works I am more than content to get a solid answer from the sequel. Overall, I'm just happy you're putting out more content in this world and am excited to see where you take it.

Anonymous

I'm gonna read whatever you write, I didn't think the ending was insufficient and I voted as such, but someone else perfectly summed up how I feel. As Merodac said I really just want to read more and I'm sad it's over, so I was tempted to vote for the epilogue but I think that would've been selfish.

Christian White

So everyone isn't dying? Even after you saying it I don't quite understand. How can eldrin survive if mana is literally their food? How can magical beings like dryad's not just turn into trees? What about elves and greyskin poison? Also tenna said half the world was about to die. It seemed pretty unambiguous that almost everyone died

Brandon Steele

Being able to make minor changes to clarify is the main benefit to posting stories like this. You get feedback and rework it so people interpret it the way you intended. Either way this story shouldn't end here. Though it sounds like you have a sequel in mind, if so then no "epilog" is required.

M

I liked the ending. I was surprised because I didn't expect THAT, but it didn't really bother me. It's sad that Sylnya and the Dryads have to die, but I don't think Elves and Eldrin will necessarily die as a direct consequence. They just have to be rather quick in managing what they got and getting some food on the table. Also, they still have their slaves, many of whom will be brainwashed and still loyal even though their masters have lost their powers. I wonder what happens to werebeasts. Do they turn to a weaker and more vulnerable form of werebeast? I guess we'll see.

Ronin316
>>61727287

Here’s my thoughts, partially informed by the theorizing on Discord: all the races aside from dryads and humans are descended from humans modified by at least one Wish. Those wishes are getting partially reversed to remove dependence on Vital Mana. Also, Caelnaste showed us that predictions don’t work past the wish. So Tenna is either guessing at the death toll based on the Genocider faction supporting Peter or she was lying to Drae about it to get him to do something.

Anonymous
>>61722352

100%. Fantastic job on this book. Thank you for the many excellent pages

Benedict Beale

What I understood from the ending was much of a haha anyone too magical is dead now, (I know this wasn't your intent) and I believe it should take minor tweaks solely to that final chapter to fix that impression for the next readers. Do not be disheartened, after many many chapters of exceptional writing and storytelling, a minor mistake like this is easy to overcome. It certainly won't stop me from reading your future works too

Taliesyn

I wasn't actually particularly surprised by the ending; I was already about 3/4 certain that was going to be his wish. The big clue was when he told the Stone that he wanted to give humanity the same level of magic as everyone else. The key word was EVERYONE. It might be too many years of RPG's plus having read Wheel of Time, but any time someone is limited to speaking the literal truth, I start looking for double meanings. As to the rest, I simply assumed that Peter didn't actually realize that the Dryads would die, being basically intelligent magical constructs, and that the Eldarin would likely starve to death. I also assumed those would be lead-ins for any Book 2 you choose to do.

Anonymous

For me the ending was unexpected, I did not see it coming at all. I figured everyone except the humans died. It seemed very out of character for Peter and the story in general. I never really picked up on that he wanted to get rid of magic and kill everyone. It was also our first time learning about the conflux besides that it grants any wish and some champions die. I think the final chapter(s) need a re-write and maybe an epilogue as well. It just seemed to simple a plan for Peter and to callous a decision to kill everyone and kill all the world-building. This entire world and story centers on magic, I just don't understand the decision to get rid of it and start completely new. You are very good at writing cliffhangers, but this one just seems to big and brutal to end on.

Nnelg

You didn't give me an option for "epilogue but no changes", so I chose "fine as-is". Readers thinking that Peter may have actually killed everyone is excellent drama! My only issue was a lack of falling action. I'd say you should even remove most of the exposition from the epilogue: just show us that Draevin and Sylna survived.