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As promised, here's next week's podcast ep. In what is probably our most emotional and impassioned ep to date, we dig into the individual tracks on the This Strange Engine album... and I detail my difficult history with it.

Paul

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Chai

You made me cry talking about grief. When I was 13 my best friend (who was 12) died of cancer and when I was 17 my ex-girlfriend killed herself, and that weighted broken hole inside my gut from the loss of them is absolutely not quantified by or comforted by 'when people die they're still with you' as a sentiment. I still struggle to think about them. That said, assorted close relatives have died and the whole 'when people die they're still with you' sentiment is something I CAN relate to - for me, a lot of Estonia is relatable when I compare it to grief I anticipated, the death of old people (which is bizarre being as it's about the unexpected loss of those in the accident), where it's not relatable when I compare it to grief I didn't see coming and had no time to prepare for. Thank you very much for sharing your thoughts and feelings about Estonia, Paul - and I'm sorry about your niece. I can't comprehend how awful I'd feel if my nephew died, and I'm so sorry you had to experience that. You have my love and sympathy.

Anonymous

Only got 2 minutes into this ep. before i had to pause it to go off and listen to nightwater. Oh yeah... they are rather the same! I’d never noticed before probably because i just can’t get into that wishing tree album for some unknown reason. In fact, I actually only bought "Ostara" a few weeks back when you mentioned you'd be covering some of the side projects... its only a quid in the racket store, which made me feel so guilty, i felt obliged to go back and spend another 50 quid on other stuff i probably didn’t need! Strangely, the day i received the CD, I watched one of your old digi episodes where you appear to be sitting in front of something that looks just like the Ostara album cover! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mb-7w8lGxGo

MrBiffo

Oh man...! Yes it does!! I much prefer Ostara to the first one, I think.

MrBiffo

Grief Is such a personal thing (as are our feelings around Marillion albums!). No two people will ever react quite the same way. Glad you're still enjoying the podcast, Chai.