Personal State (Patreon)

TW: Drugs

I've not been doing so well. I wasn't sure if I would say this as I am quite embarrassed about it but communication with you seems like a more ideal option. I won't bore you with the details but long story short, my mum is chronically unwell and is getting worse. I also suffer from the symptoms of my chronic illnesses. I am going through a divorce. It's a lot at once for me. The problem is that I have been struggling to cope with it properly and ended up resorting to daily drugs as a coping mechanism (Alcohol, GHB, Ecstasy, Cocaine, Crystal MD and Ketamine). It was to the point where I was genuinely considering Meth. I am under a lot of financial stress as I have tanked my finances due to not caring about my future anymore. I know this is all my fault. I just want to communicate my current life state. I am just happy to have an opportunity for a fresh start.

I know drugs are not the healthy route and I have flushed all that I have. This could have played out very differently and I am thankful I stopped now before it was too late. I am trying my best to recover mentally.

You are all so patient with me already and I feel like I have failed you all. I know I have a lot to catch up on.

I really can't thank you enough for your support and kindness.

Thank you for reading.

-Nathaneal