We're really sorry... (Patreon)

February is a short month anyway, but we've had pretty much an entire month with just a handful of posts.  After two years of hearing from me almost daily, I suppose you're wondering what is going on.

Well this month started badly enough with about 20 patrons cancelling immediately following the review, by the Trust and Safety team, that resulted in me deleting around 400 images: which had built up over two years and were now all of a sudden violating community guidelines.  And that despite dozens of other artists continuing to post scenes of chloroforming, knock outs, carrying, peril that are NOT considered to be glorifying sexual violence.  I did wonder precisely why Patreon - my friend and business partner - was coming down so hard on me so suddenly and also so inconsistently.  Well, information has now come to light (following anonymous trolling of my deviantART page) that this review was initiated due to totally false and possibly malicious allegations that I had been abusing a third party site (StarNow).  I had never even heard of that website before these accusations appeared on my dA and I had to find out what it was.  Never mind that the person acting on that site and claiming to be me was in fact not me, it seems that Patreon have embarked on a thoroughly unjustified de-platforming attempt based (it seems) off this complaint without even telling me it existed or providing evidence and/or seeking to verify my alleged bad behaviour.

Now that this information has come to light I am investigating the appeals process with a view to appealing the review of my account and my suspension without warning which I now consider to be unfair.

Although I have raised this issue now, I ask you please not to discuss it below in the comment section and I bring it up merely to clarify the current position and keep you informed.

Unfortunately the titanic effort I made over several weeks to delete two years of work, catalogue and preserve it, the many hours and sleepless nights I spent exploring alternatives to Patreon - it had its cost.  I developed a repetitive strain injury in my right hand and wrist that has left me unable to use the PC mouse for extended periods without considerable pain.  I am getting treatment and the prognosis is good but this has left me really in a difficult position where I really wanted to make some excellent artwork to keep you guys interested and retain your pledges, but was unable to do so.  I have been neither in a mental nor physical condition to be creative.

There is one final thing that I have not mentioned up until now and I offer it not as an excuse but a reason for my absence this month.  Four weeks ago (during the period of my suspension) a very close friend of 25 years took his own life and passed away suddenly.  He left no will and a huge mess and the last few weeks have been a living nightmare of trying to protect and give support to people who needed me.  The funeral was only two days ago and I am trying to get back to everything I neglected over the past weeks.

The fact that I have been unable to maintain this Patreon during this critical period, and the fact that I am not able to post the kind of work that most of you joined to see has been incredibly stressful especially when every day starts with the news of 2-3 more cancelled pledges.  I am down from 168 to 138 already and I expect a spike in cancellations today (28th).

I have considered 'pausing' my campaign which would lose me a month's billing but that in itself is not a solution to people drifting away.

I brought three of my characters into the studio and enjoyed making this picture today even though my wrist is strapped up and aching right now.  I want to get back to making art and the more crap that is thrown at me and the more unfair the treatment I get from Patreon, the more it hardens my resolve to continue.  This said, I am only a fallible human and, as I have learned, we are all only mortal.

The ONLY thing that is going to make me give up on Patreon is if YOU the Patrons decide to withdraw your support for this creator page.  If that happens, I cannot argue with reality.  I cannot be expected to continue as before with half the Patrons (and half the income) I had before.  Should this be what I am left with at the end of this week, I will take that message from you as your final decision.  Thanks for all the nice pictures and good luck.

I cannot say for certain when I will have my RSI fixed and be able to post every day again, I cannot say whether my appeal against the account review will be successful.  But as long as you continue with your pledges, there is at least some HOPE of fixing things.

I am sorry if this comes across as overly emotional but the last few weeks have been some of the most difficult I can remember and these problems with Patreon (which is like a second job for me) have just really topped it all off.

It may be that you feel you didn't get what you paid for this month and I can sympathise with that. Patreon provides the facility to refund pledges when people are dissatisfied so if you would like a refund for February, please drop me a message and I will sort one out for you immediately.

I hope to post some more over the coming days but I will have to see how I am.  When I look at the body of deleted work it is really huge and it shows me that I worked hard over the past two years. Let us hope that these few weeks are a temporary challenge, a blip, that can be overcome and long-forgotten in the scheme of things.

Thanks to all of you remaining 138 for your past, current, and future support.  Thank you also for the kind messages I have received by email.  You are all welcome to email me about future plans etc and the way to get my email address is by dropping me a message here. Please note also that I sent out a number of emails to patrons that MAY have gone unseen if the email address you used to sign up here is not frequently-checked.  You may want to check it now and/or your spam folders.