It was never going to be sweet with him... (Patreon)

Idaho is quiet. Too quiet sometimes, where suburban boredom met my need to explore myself a little more deeply. Fortunately, opportunity came knocking.

At the sleepy end of our road, the old neighbours were moving out.

I caught sight of him, moving chairs and a few guitars into the lounge from the porch.

‘Hey I’m Jay.’

‘Cassie. Nice to meet you.’

‘It’s just me staying here, bought another house away from LA, wanted the peace and quiet.’

He had a Latin vibe to him, dark hair, dark eyebrows, dreamy in the way his eyes tore into me every time he spoke. He was tall, ripped in his henley top, open buttons revealing the top lines to his chest. Not a normal boy of our neighbourhood. He had an attitude that made him seem ten years older than he actually was.

‘You should come over tomorrow. I’m doing drinks.’

‘What about quarantine?’ My dad would freak if he knew I was out like that. And yet, I was more than a little intrigued.

‘Does it look like I follow rules Cassie?’ There was something in the way he said it, his voice was a cooling syrup, it flowed effortlessly. The seconds linger in the air between us a little smile leaves me, my eyes meeting his.

‘I’d like that, ping me. Here’s my number.’

I came over. We got along better than I had ever thought, he was in a metal band and even produced his own music for movies, games, TikTok, it was fucking cool to be honest. Best of all, he was way too self-confident and charming, the perfect mix of asshole and stud. Resisting him was like trying not to fall over a waterfall. He knew when to push me and when to pull.

His friends were there but bounced in the early morning after a few too many tequilas. He was in his muscle tee, Metallica logo inscribed over it, hair all dishevelled and veins standing out in his forearms as he leant on the kitchen doorway. It was too delicious and I had to have him.

Of course, he took the lead. ‘Here’s what is going to happen, I’m going to carry you into that room, strip you down very quickly and gag you with your panties whilst I fuck the life out of you.’

‘Jay, that’s quite forward.’ Who was I kidding. He could do anything to me. My nipples turned hard as he cornered me, one hand reaching around to tug on my hair as he towered over me.  Lifting me onto his shoulder and running to the bedroom with my giggles resounding through the house, we fumbled around on the soft sheets for a short while but he was clearly in the mood for no bullshit. My white top went flying across the room, my bra was ripped away from me and my jeans were pulled to my ankles. With brute strength he flipped me onto my front and ripped my panties away from my toes, shoving them into my mouth. He wasn’t lying about that part.

‘It’s okay Cass, relax for me, you look so good.’ I clenched his hand hard as he curled inside me slowly, filling me up right to the hilt, my excitement glistening his thick member as he drove inside me even deeper, a little gagged whimper leaving me involuntarily as he slapped my pert bottom, leaving a quick mark for his visual pleasure. He was so big, it was difficult to focus on anything else except spilling my arousal all over his length. He held my hands behind my back and began to pump me vigorously as my makeup smeared across the pillow and my moans grew louder and louder.

‘Don’t wake up the neighbours now.’  What followed was a symphony of the sweet and the merciless as he rotated between thrusting furiously into my sticky core and making out with me till I couldn’t breathe. Our sweaty bodies clamped in the early morning as I hung onto his headboard and rode him till my legs quivered, with his big length sliding inside me faster and faster and his right hand administering fierce slaps to my face when I wasn’t performing to his standards.

I should have known then, it was never going to be sweet with him, he wanted to take me somewhere deeper, to confront my filthiest desires. That first night was the tip of the iceberg. Even in quarantine we made it work, it sucked my first love had to happen under such circumstances. But Jay taught me a lot about myself, how much I could love degradation, how blurred the lines between pain and pleasure were and how much I could crave one man.