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A Personal Note. (Patreon)

Published:
2023-02-23 00:15:43
Imported:
2023-03

Content

Now, I'm probably just over thinking things and getting all worked up for nothing. But honestly feel like I'm failing as a content creator.


You see, I have ADHA and Asperger Syndrome. Quite the combo and they have advantages and disadvantages. One advantage being I have one hell of an imagination and a natural talent for art and creating stories. 


But I SUCK, at time scheduling, time management and being organized. Also my motivation and drive is powered souly by passion and personal interest. And well.... That can be a double edged sword.

It's good when I got the drive, 'cause when I got it, I'm a fucking machine at what I do! But once that drive loses momentum, it's like trying to start a car with a dead battery.


And right now, I feel burnt out. I want to keep making chapters and audio stuff, and it's kills me when I don't. 

(By the way this is no way me saying I'm quitting. I'll never quit.) 


It's just when I slow down and lose momentum, I feel like I'm letting those who like my stuff, down.

Again, I'm probably overthinking things and there's really nothing to worry about. I just wanted to get it out there how I'm doing and how I'm trying to process things.


What do you think? Am I overthinking and worrying about nothing?      

Comments

AtomicTEM

You are absolutely not failing as a creator. Honestly in comparison to me you have 10 times the work ethic, what you have done over the last few months is amazing. Its okay to feel burnt out. Fun Fact I make mods for games like Team Fortress 2 and Fallout 3, there are bugs in my mod, tiny bugs that would take me not even 5 minutes to fix, but I never do, they are slight imperfection that nobody but myself knows about, heck sometimes people find them and think they are hilarious. Honestly I thought that you were going to upload anew chapter ever 1-2 months and am audio chapter every 3 months, I was still glad to support you as I have, and if you don't upload anything for a month or two I will still support you. Now are you worrying about nothing? Well, I think that you asking that question might mean that there is something, though how significant that is I don't know I;m not you, but from my experience in life (I've been to very dark places mentally) step back remind you what make you happy or what made you happy, take a break. Also its winter, and world is not doing so great, so it may also be normal to feel a bit unmotivated, heck I slept for 5 hour in the day today because felt like I needed it after a week of midterm exams. Another thing, don't forget you wrote one chapter of Fallout Gears and then did write the second one for a while, and that was okay, If told myself that Fallout Gears would grow to what it is now, I would be ecstatic, and I have. All of this to say, whatever you do (besides deleting all your content because I have seen to many modders delete their beautiful works after a mental break down) I support it and whatever you choose to do.

AtomicTEM

P.S I've been thinking of making simple mod for Fallout 4 that adds a reference to Fallout Natures Gears, like a single room hidden away somewhere. Maybe draws some attention to Fallout Natures Gears, and I think would be pretty cool.

Predman1227
>>102527010

I think that would be a wonderful idea. I've always wanted Nature's Gears to be in Fallout 4 in some way. Also I would never delete my work for any reason. It's a part of my personal history, my legacy. None of us live forever, so it's always a good idea to leave something permeant behind, so future people will remember we existed.