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Chapter 30

Back in overalls and Huggies Pull-Ups, my 4 year old look was complete. I carried around a water bottle with me which looked more like a sippy cup under these circumstances. The only way I could get my cellphone back was if I used the bathroom like a ‘’big girl’’, after sucking on my thumb for ten freaking minutes. 

One more twisted game for me to play. Whenever I thought the ‘‘adult woman wearing a diaper’‘ act would get old to them, they came back with more humiliation in store.

I’m sure you’d agree I was stuck in hell, but I had seen worse. At least there was a silver lining to it all. Today was my last day in the cottage. I only had to play my part for a few hours before getting my phone back and texting James to pick me up after work. Nothing they could do or say would keep me here. I was only biding my time to avoid suspicion until the end of the day.

Casey had insisted we go outside to catch some sunlight. It was 2:00 PM already. Obviously I had to continuously drink from my water bottle in order to ‘’stay hydrated’’. I was reluctantly sipping on it when we ran into my aunt. 

Sally: Good afternoon girls. Ashley, I suspect you had some time to think after such a long night..

I wondered if she was referring to the fact that I overslept or to the spectacular spanking I had received the night before. My butt still ached under the soft padding that covered it. 

Ashley: I slept for so long I practically have bedsores.

Sally: Well we both know you were cruising for a bruising.

She gave my bum a few pats, as if to remind me of what happened, but when she did, she seemed surprised by the result. 

Sally: What have you got under there, darling?

Before I could reply, Casey interrupted me. I was relieved I didn’t have to say it.

Casey: They’re princess Pull-Ups, the ones the children wear.

She stared sharply at Casey and asked, using her stone cold inquisitive tone:

Sally: Why isn’t she in a diaper? 

There was a brief silence. The question wasn’t asked to me, but to my ‘caregiver’ and for once I was glad I was being treated like a clueless child. I had no bearing on this decision, I was simply ‘’put in Pull-Ups’, literally. According to my aunt, Casey was in charge. She probably imagined her sliding my training pants up my legs in the bathroom.

Casey: That was my idea. She woke up dry this morning and I thought we could try something new.

Sally: I believe I was clear when I mentioned her repeated accidents. I don’t think we should reward her childish behavior with... those.

Casey: On the contrary, I agree with you. And what underwear more fitting to her behavior than these pink Huggies diapers they call ‘’training pants’’ for toddlers? 

My aunt did not seem convinced. At this point it was almost funny to me to witness this conversation I had no part in. 

A week ago I would’ve felt embarrassed that they were discussing my underwear situation. I would’ve looked around to make sure no one was paying attention to my babysitter rambling about my diapered state. Today, however, I had no embarrassment left in me. I could only grin and grind my teeth as I let them debate on how to potty train me.

Sally: We did try Pull-Ups before. It did not work. I don’t think Ashley has any interest in using the toilet like an adult. She would much rather go in her pants.

Casey: Then let her. These aren’t the bedwetting diapers for teenagers. They’re the smaller version, they don’t hold as much. If our little Ashley decides to pee herself today, I’m not sure how much her princess Pull-Ups will hold. Then it’s on her to deal with the leaks in her overalls.

Sally: I see... You hear that Ashley? Your babysitter might’ve found a way to get you to use the potty after all. 

Ashley: I’m very grateful aunty.

These sour words left a bitter taste in my mouth.

Sally: Good girl. Well I’ll leave you to it then. I’m going to catch a game of tennis with your cousin. Be good!

She waved at us and gave us the fakest smile I’d ever seen before waltzing off. I could almost see a skip in her step, she was beaming with victory after seeing me put back in my place. I couldn't help but to stick my tongue out at her when she was far enough.

Casey: You actually enjoy this, don’t you?

Ashley: What are you talking about?

Casey: I can tell you’re having fun playing the victim. Plus you get to relive your childhood, free of responsibilities and expectations. It’s all a big game of House to you.

Ashley: You guys are acting as if I asked for any of this! Can’t you see I’m being treated like a goddamn child here?!

Casey: I see it, but maybe you’re also acting like one. Have you thought about that?

Ashley: That’s what I keep hearing. I hope one day you’re in a situation where you get humiliated and belittled and there’s nothing you can do about it. Maybe then you’ll understand what it’s like and grow some compassion.

I stormed off. How could she say something like that? I did feel less ashamed as before, but that had to come from getting used to this absurdity, right?

Casey: Don’t forget your bottle babe! Drink up.

I couldn’t help but smile a little.

We spent an hour outside, walking around town, checking out stores and getting a smoothie. Casey was nice enough, although she kept her babysitting role very seriously. It was kind of weird for me, considering we used to be friends, to have her bossing me around. 

She kept asking if I had to go and urging me to drink more. I dreaded that prospect, but I knew that time would come when I would need to stick my thumb in my mouth and wait 10 full minutes before entering the bathroom. I was just hoping it wouldn’t be out and about in public, I would die of embarrassment. 

Luckily for me, we headed back to the family cottage just as I was feeling the need to pee. I wouldn’t have to do the potty dance in the middle of the street while sucking on my thumb like a dumb baby.

Thinking back on it however... it probably would’ve been a better idea.

_____

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