Daily Free-Write October 17, 2020 (Patreon)

All the childhoods I will never live. You only get one chance. You only get one. 

He was jealous. It was true. Jealous of all the childhoods he would never live. Jealous because you only get one. 

"It's not fair," the tiger said, banging the dashboard in the mall parking lot. 

He worked at crockery coop, a furniture and home goods store that sold to upscale clientelle. The kids' section was something of any child's dreams with hand embroidered images of popular characters on the comforters, and expertly crafted bunk beds made of real wood, with amenities like shelves and built in stairs. 

He wished he could have a room like the ones that the room design team had mocked up. It didn't matter how fancy it was, it just brought back so many fond memories of an easier time in his life, when his biggest worry was what kind of game he would play after naptime, and how far he would get before he was told he had to come eat, or go to bed. He had been so impatient to grow up, but nobody told him it was going to be so damn hard. 

He looked at the time. 11:11 PM, time to make a wish. He closed his eyes, and wished with all his might for another chance to enjoy childhood. But when he opened them, everything was the same. The time read 11:12, but that was it. He sighed and turned on the ignition. Time to go home. 

He drove down the highway, exhausted from his long work day. Swerving a bit, then shaking himself awake. He had to start stocking his car with 300 minute energy drinks. He could feel his eyes drooping again as he continued forward, when suddenly in the middle of the street there was a bright figure. A man in a big purple dinosaur costume, and he was headed right for him!

He swerved to avoid the man, and the car went into a spin. coming to rest inches from a tree in someone's front yard. He got out of the car and looked but the man was gone. The porch light turned on and an irage Gazelle started yelling at him.

"Sorry! Sorry!!" he said, as he hopped in the car and backed into the street once more. 

He high tailed it out of there, but not before looking around one more time. He could have sworn that he saw his old imaginary friend Blarney. But that was impossible. He must have been really tired. The adrenaline pumping through his system kept him awake as he drove cautiously toward his house past the nice neighborhood near the mall, past the strip malls, and then to the more gritty part of town where he lived. 

"Is this where you live, Frankie?"

"It's Ajax now," he grumbled, before doing a double take at the dinosaur in the rearview. He spun around. There was nothing, then he turned back just in time to stop for a red light. 

"You oughtta keep your eyes on the road kiddo." 

Ajax looked in the rearview again and saw it clear as day. Turned back, nothing. Looked forward, there he was. 

"Okay, okay, Ajax. Get a hold of yourself man. You're obviously hallucinating." 

He pressed the palms of his hands into his eyes.

"The light's green, friend."

"Oh right," he said looking up and stepping on the gas. "Wait, am I really doing this right now? Am I, a full grown tiger, talking to an imaginary friend?"

"Looks like it," said the purple dinosaur. "But I think you'd better finish driving home before we chat any more. Go ahead. I'll wait." 

Ajax just shook his head and drove on. After passing a few seedy motels, they arrived at the Affordable Arms apartment complex. The tiger pulled into his usual parkins space and sat back, rubbing the bridge of his nose. He had to start getting more sleep. Nearly crashing his car was one thing but imaginary purple dinosaurs? That was a step too far. 

"Wow, Frankie. This doesn't look like the kind of place an astronaut lives."

"I'm not an astronaut," said the tiger, wrinkling his nose, his hand still pinching the spot below his closed eyes. 

"Oh, so you decided to become a superhero instead. That's right, you never could decide which you wanted to be.

"There *are* no superheroes, Blarney."

"Oh, so you *do* remember me." said the large purple dinosaur, putting his hands on his hips. "I was beginning to think you'd forgotten."

"Not forgotten," said the Tiger, "Just...grown up." 

He sighed and stepped out of the car, slamming the door shut behind him and trudging off. 

"Hey, wait! I still got to talk to you!" 

The tiger ignored this, trudging up the stairs and pulling out his key. He let himself into the studio apartment. One grimy couch he'd found on the side of the street, that served as both his bed and his dining area. A low chipped particle board coffee table taken from the dumpster area outside. And an 'entertainment center' constructed out of plywood and cindrblocks. Those were the most notable features of the place.

"I'm beginning to think you're not an astronaut," said the dinosuar, whose reflection Ajax caught in the glass of the TV as he plopped down on the couch. 

"Ding Ding Ding, we have a winner!" said the tiger, grabbing a half-smoked cigarette and a lukewarm beer from that morning and taking a swig before lighting up.

"You really shouldn't smoke those! Those are so bad for you! Just say no, Frankie!...Hey, who gave you those? Was it Billy from Mr. Henderson's class? Tell me the truth now."

"Ugh, get off my back, Blarney! I haven't thought of Billy since I was six! What are you doing here, and why can I only see you in reflections?" 

"Well... It's because the mirror world is where magic comes from. And... well, I was called here by magic. But... well, I don't understand...I should be able to step through and... wait a second. What do you mean 'was six'? You *are* six, silly Billy."

The tiger snorted derisively.

"Shyeah, 20 years ago. I'm 26, Blarney. I don't have time for Imaginery friends. I have to work."

"Ohh... that explains it. I can't come through because you grew up and now you don't fully believe. But... but then... why am I here? I couldn't be here if you were a full grown adult either." 

The tiger shrugged and took another drag of his cigarette. Then, he leaned back on the couch letting out a telltale crinkle before he exhaled a plume of smoke with a satisfied sigh.

"*cough* *cough* Gross, Frankie!" 

Ajax shifted again scratched his crotch. Another loud crinkle. 

"Hey, wait... w-what's that sound?" 

"Uh, nothin." the tiger said, strangely embarrassed to admit to his imaginary friend what he was wearing underneath his pants?

"Is that a diaper I hear? It is!"

"N-No, it's not it-"

"I *knew* you weren't really a grown up, Frankie! Haha, and you really had me fooled for a minute there, buddy. But you should really get out of here, it's not a safe place for a little boy like you. You should be home with Mommy and Daddy."

"The tiger, embarrassed and at a loss for words, stubbed the but of the cigarette out in his ashtray and got up to go. 

"Why did I have to pick an annoying kid's show character to be my imaginary freind? Could I have picked something more original and less annoying?" 

The tiger stalked off to the bathroom to take a shower. He stripped off his shirt and slacks, and pulled down his diaper. It landed on the ground with a thud. 

"Wow, Frankie," said the dinosaur, who could be seen in the mirror bending down and examining the undergarment. "You sure did a number on those. But you shouldn't have taken that off yourself. That's a grownup's job! And just where *are* the grownups anyway?"

"All gone." said Frankie, waving his hand off in the air and speaking in a mock child voice. "Bye-bye. Frankie all alone now."

"Oh Frankie, I'm so sorry. No wonder you made that wish. 

"Wish? O-oh, yeah. I did make a wish didn't I?"

The tiger stepped into the shower and out of view. 

"You wished for a second childhood, right? And I'm here to give it to you!" 

"Yeah, well, thanks Blarney, but no thanks. You're not real. You're a figment of a crazy overtired tiger's imagination. Now go away." 

There was no response. The tiger peeked his head out of the shower and checked the mirror. Nothing. 

"Hm. Well, good riddance. I don't need a trip to the looney bin to be the icing that tops off this shit cake of an adult life." He went back to scrubbing himself.

But Barney *was* there. 

"That poor kid," said the imaginary friend to himself. "He may look different but I can tell he's the same boy I knew all those years ago, and if that's the case then he *needs* me. There *must* be something I can do to make his wish come true." 

The dinosaur thought and thought, and then he snapped his fingers. 

"That's it!" 

He clapped and rubbed his hands together. Frankie was going to be so happy when he found out what Blarney had in store for him. But it would have to be a surprise. And it would start as soon as he got out of his shower.