Reverend Rizzsanity: 31 (Patreon)
Content
Title: Stonks!
Heavy snow covers Qing Mao Mountain. Civilians and Gu Masters adorn heavier clothes to keep the cold at bay. Their noses redden when stepping outside, sniffing, and sometimes rubbing their hands to warm their numb knuckles. However, anyone can note the slight sadness and gloom in the air despite it being a rare sunny December morning.
The Wolf Tide!
The losses of the three Clans continue to rise. However, it’s not the loss of Gu Masters that’s left the Gu Yue Clan feeling sad.
The Wolf Packs destroyed a few hamlets, leading to a food shortage. There’s enough in the Clan’s storage to support the Village. However, everyone fears the future should the Wolf Packs continue rising with such fierceness.
Today, it’s the mortals—it could be ‘them’ tomorrow. How can the Gu Masters not fear? The silver lining to the current disaster was the survival of the Gu Masters stationed in these hamlets. Gu Yue Clan doesn’t care about mortal lives. They cared about the services provided to them through the cheap labor and their Gu Masters.
Sunlight filters into Lo Jik’s bedroom through the blinder’s slit, announcing its need for replacement. He slowly opens his eyes, stretching his legs with a soft moan leaving his lips. Mo Yan doesn’t stop at his movements. She increases her pace instead and allows her pillowy lips to slide down against his veiny shaft as thick spit sputters from the corner of her lips. *Ghhk* Wet, sloppy choking noises echo from her throat as she sinks till her spit-lathered lips kiss against his curling balls. Lo Jik’s hand suddenly covers her head, holding Mo Yan’s head in place. Her lower eyelids tremble as accumulated tears slowly down her cheeks until her nostrils flare, causing an errand jet of cum and snot to flow out.
Lo Jik exhales as he slowly lets her pull up.
Mo Yan lets go of his cock with a seductive pop before gasping for air and coughing. She looks up at Lo Jik, soothingly nuzzling her cheek against his sloppy cock as a thin stream of cum leaks slips from the corner of her stained lips.
“Good morning, dear~!” she whispers.
“You didn’t have to do that,” Lo Jik smirks. “But I loved it.”
“Heh,” she grins as Lo Jik sits up, cleaning her face with a towel. She lets him do that, giggling, “You say that. But how can I let it be in pain every morning?” She pokes the tip of cock. “And I loved it when you did it yesterday morning.”
The world IS going to hell, but it doesn’t affect Lo Jik and his impeccable game as a husband. He knows how to keep things exciting in a marriage. Besides, he’s unknowingly become a crucial reason for Mo Yan’s steady rise in combat prowess. They’ve been married for almost two months now!
Mo Yan now possesses three Rank 3 Gu and a few Rank 2 Gu to support her focus and path. Even though she’s a scout, an Elder like her must have an offensive method.
After cleaning up, Mo Yan bids farewell, stating, “Be sure to arrive on the alliance slope on time. I’m expected to arrive early with Qing Shu, Chi Shan, and others.”
Lo Jik sees her off with a pleasant smile. As she leaves, he settles in his usual spot.
2 months.
Lo Jik shakes his head.
It’s an understatement to say he earned a lot.
After all, he managed to get all Silver Achievements but one.
[Churning Milk (Silver): Experienced an Orgasm Through Mo Yan’s Breasts. Parties Involved—Host, Gu Yue Mo Yan. Rewards Stored.]
[Silver-Tongued (Silver): Experienced an Orgasm Through Mo Yan’s Mouth. Parties Involved—Host, Gu Yue Mo Yan. Rewards Stored.]
[Why Not Anal? (Silver): Experienced an Orgasm Through Mo Yan’s Butt Cheeks. Parties Involved—Host, Gu Yue Mo Yan. Rewards Stored.]
*Hisssss*
A low hiss spreads in his bedroom as a meter-long blood-red python crawls atop the bed before coiling around Lo Jik’s feet.
Rank 2 Blood Stream Python!
As expected, several things occurred in the last two months. First, Lo Jik refined the Rank 1 Blood Qi Gu, using it to advance the Blood Python into Rank 2 Blood Stream Python Gu. Its next advancement is Rank 3 Blood Torrent Python. If he’s lucky, he’ll refine the Gu into Rank 4 Blood Flood Python and Rank 5 Blood River Python Gu!
The Gu turns into a stream of red light before entering Lo Jik’s Second Aperture.
The advancement of Rank 2 Blood Stream Python is merely the beginning. Even if he focused on developing and polishing his multi-tasking ability, that didn’t mean he and Mo Yan didn’t want to do it whenever possible. Gu Masters often have higher libido due to their risky lifestyle. If it wasn’t for Mo Yan sensibly taking care of a few things, she’d already been pregnant. However, she didn’t want to trouble herself with pregnancy right before the Wolf Tide.
Lo Jik heavily agreed due to his reasons.
Journals, materials, and Gu, including another rare instance of an injured Rank 3 Gu. Unfortunately, Lo Jik didn’t heal it, letting the Rank 3 True Mind Eye die. Mo Yan already had this Gu. It allows a Gu Master’s five senses to grow exponentially. However, it’s challenging to feed it, and it’s not naturally found in Qing Mao Mountain, not leaving Lo Jik with any excuse to reveal it.
Such cases became common once Mo Yan built her set of Shadow Gu. Shadow Gu Worms reputably produce better quality Gu regarding Concealment, Movement, and Attack. Masters of this path are incredible assassins. Alas, such Gu is not common in Qing Mao, and the few Gu on this path Lo Jik received were destined to die since he couldn’t feed them.
He could give them to Mo Yan, but it would do more damage than help. For instance, Lo Jik received a rare Rank 2 Shadow Follower Gu. It’s a crucial ingredient for the Rank 3 Shadow Edge Gu. However, Lo Jik could not hand the Gu to Mo Yan.
Kindness isn’t lost on him. Lo Jik helps her when he can—when he has a convenient explanation. Conversely, reckless help and selfless kindness will only endanger him.
His greatest asset was gaining a Rank 4 Gu Master’s travel records bereft of any secret recipe. However, it maintained its use of extensive knowledge about the Southern Border. Heck! He never knew the Five Regional Walls was a real thing! He always chalked it up as an unmarked border guarded by Gu Masters of the five regions. He also learned about several named Mountains.
There are several intriguing ecosystems near Qing Mao Mountain.
Mountain of Bones, Bai Gu.
Fiery Peak, Qing Qing.
The Starry Gazing Cliff, Yao Lan.
Floating Boulders of Heaven, Ning Chu.
The list goes on.
Lo Jik recalls how awe-inspiring these records were.
Aside from the accumulation of knowledge and the unfortunate Rank 2 Shadow Gu, he could never reveal as they died of starvation, Lo Jik earned plenty!
Out of the 53 rewards, 31 summoned materials. There were times when Lo Jik brought kilos of wet dirt on his bed or stinky Beast King’s dump, making him clean things several times! However, such materials were qualitative food for his Gu. For instance, the Smell Lock Gu consumes beast shit. Consuming the Beast King’s excrement allows it to sustain longer for less food. Such excrements are good fertilizers once dried and powdered, acting as high-quality Gu refinement material. Lo Jik couldn’t throw them away. However, caking and drying it without getting caught isn’t easy.
Instead, he wrapped it up in leaves despite his moderate disgust and stored it. He used large leaves to keep the waste from infecting his other stored products.
Lo Jik sold 5 bundles to the Clan and handed 7 to Mo Yan. His costs weren’t low either. Since Mo Yan procures the food for the White Jade Gu, she is aware of Lo Jik's possessions. However, she doesn’t tear such pretenses. Instead, she shows enough respect for his secrets and trump cards, more than relieved that her Husband isn’t defenseless. Still, he continued paying for such costs.
He currently possesses 6451 Primeval Stones.
As for the remaining 22 rewards, 6 were recorded journals and recipes.
The four Shadow Gu and the injured Rank 3 Gu died. He only wished that the Earth Hold Gu could store other Gu Worms.
The remaining Gu were either great or pure burden for Lo Jik since they were easy to feed, but he didn’t have a use for them and couldn’t sell them.
Lo Jik closes his eyes, glancing into his aperture.
The Hope Gu shines brightly, unbothered by a longer Blood Stream Python coiled around it. The Rank 3 Feathered Boots Gu hovers around. Two Spider Gu rest in their webs, stranded in midair. The Blood Rousing Incense floats in the sea beside one of the two Vitality Leaves, upon which is a curled Smell Lock Gu. Near these three is a swimming, fist-sized, blood-red rat! Its beady eyes are like precious rubies.
The Rank 2 Blood Qi Gu! Lo Jik didn’t get to refine this Gu and received it as a reward. One the other vitality leaf rests a strange lump of green flesh. This lump looks slick and slippery. Observing the Gu for a few minutes will reveal incredibly thin slits in the center of the flesh twitching rapidly.
The Rank 2 Seed Communication Gu! This Gu creates 7 seeds a day from its slits. When fed to someone, a Gu Master possessing this Gu can send their voice into the recipient's mind! There are several restrictions on this Gu. First, a seed’s effect lasts 4 hours only. Second, the recipient and the speaker must be within 400 meters. Third, the recipient cannot communicate with the speaker.
It’s one-sided communication.
Lo Jik knows two Gu Masters who own this Gu—Mo Bei and Fang Zheng. The former received it from Mo Yan, and the latter borrowed it from Qing Shu. This Gu is easy to feed and has satisfactory effects on a team. A scout can use the Gu to move ahead and relay information to the team behind them.
He shifts his focus from the Seed Communication Gu to another rare Gu. It’s floating on the Primeval Sea, facing up. It’s a striped, orange bee without wings and its stinger.
Rank 2 Tiger Strength Gu!
The use of such Gu is already known. Also, Lo Jik has strangely higher caps. He always could hold the strength of four boars. Or, this time, two boars and a tiger. However, this Gu is weaker than the rest. While Lo Jik used the last month to solidify a tiger’s strength in his body, he didn’t find many tigers to feed the Gu. The rise of wolves heavily shifted the Beasts’ territories.
Lo Jik also has other Gu like Rattan Shield, Bamboo Warrior, and Spring Jump in his aperture. However, Blood Qi, Tiger Strength, and Seed Communication are the few well-received Gu by Lo Jik.
The remaining nine Gu? Lo Jik wants to sell them swiftly. However, he cannot sell them in Gu Yue Village without appropriate reasons and chooses to feed them for now. He can’t let them die, right? What if he’s in a situation where he needs them?
He heaves deeply. Things would be different if he were an Elder. He can effortlessly sell these Gu to the caravan or other Elders if he has a similar position.
‘Soon,’ he musters. ‘I’ve already met Shen Cui in the bazaar. We haven’t talked because I’m waiting for her to marry.’
Lo Jik is unwilling to expend any more effort until she marries. Wouldn’t he be a fool for wasting his time if Fang Zheng took her as a concubine instead of a wife? He’s already done everything he can, short of kissing and fucking Shen Cui in Fang Zheng’s presence.
‘I’m aware of the differences in the ranks between the achievements in this world. A threesome with an Elder and an Elder’s wife should net me a Golden Achievement. No, two Golden Achievements if I can get them to swap cum.’
After all, his Trait only registers a threesome and other group achievements once he creampies his partners or makes them swap his jizz with each other.
Lo Jik moves from his bed after a round of cultivation. He quietly wears the warmer inner shirt before donning his blue tunic and covering it with a light-blue, furlined kimono shirt. He picks the nearby bamboo wraps, tying them around his forearms and ankles, adjusting his bamboo shoes, and running his fingers through his hair to loosely comb them.
He rubs his cold nose as he steps out, inhaling the fresh air. His gaze brightens once he watches the beautiful snow.
Like Lo Jk, several Gu Masters can be seen walking down the southern exit, descending in small groups before collecting near a sharp cliff. From a bird’s POV, one observes blue, brown, and white collecting together.
Gu Yue, Xiong, and Bai!
Like the Gu Yue Clan, Xiong and Bai Clan’s Gu Masters wear similar uniforms with different color schemes.
The Xiong Clan dons brown, while the Bai clan assumes white and sky blue.
The Gu Masters of the three clans arrange themselves in neat rows, standing in the cold and gazing at the giant boulder atop the cliff carved into a hollowed building.
The Alliance Slope!
Gu Yue Clan’s Second Patriarch formed the first alliance with the Bai and Xiong Clan on this hill. It's been used to set truces between the three clans for generations since that event.
Standing in the cold, the Gu Masters cannot help but talk with each other to alleviate their boredom. After all, talks between higher-ups tend to extend without rhyme or reason. Case in point—the negotiations have been going on for months without a resolute conclusion!
Lo Jik observes the other Gu Masters.
Gu Masters of the Gu Yue Clan are leaner, projecting a fierce disposition cultivated through numerous dangerous encounters.
Gu Masters of the Xiong Clan are almost all buff and muscular. Like Gu Yue’s Moonlight, the Xiong Clan has their signature Bear Strength Gu. Lo Jik desired that Gu until he used the Tiger Strength Gu.
Gu Masters from the Bai Clan are pale and skinny. They might look gentle in their soft, white tones. However, their signature Rank 1 Stream Gu is incredibly vicious—long-ranged and fatal! Anyone who underestimates them due to their exterior is a stupid motherfucker.
“Tch, I heard Qing Shu, Mo Yan, and Chi Shan advanced to Rank 3. The Gu Yue Clan is domineering!”
“Hehe! Don’t feel so sad. Life of a young Elder may not be so easy.”
“Hmph! That Mo Yan is already an Elder. She cut off my arm once, costing me a small fortune to heal it. Isn’t she married?”
“Didn’t you hear? She married a Rank 2 upstart.”
“Psst, look, that Xiong Jiao Man. Don’t fall for her delicate appearance. She is battle crazy!”
“Don’t forget about Bai Zhong Shui! You don’t know who she is? See that chubby girl? Yeah, her. She is promiscuous, and her Water Boar’s Gu food is a man’s essence. That woman killed a few men and fed their family jewels to her Gu. Don’t ever get in a room alone with her!”
“Where is that Bai Ning Bing? I don’t see her.”
“Isn’t she also an Elder? But I don’t see her around the square.”
The Alliance Slope started as a forested region, experiencing generations of changes and development to accommodate the Clan Leaders, turning the area into a town square surrounded by snow-capped forest.
“She isn’t here.”
More Gu Masters start discussing Bai Ning Bing.
“That girl was terrifying. She defeated every challenger during the last Gu Competition!”
“Didn’t she also defeat an Elder as Rank 2 Gu Master? I wonder how strong she is now that she’s already a Rank 3 Gu Master for years.”
“She’s the Bai Clan’s rising talent. But so what? Our Gu Yue Clan has Fang Zheng!”
Fang Zheng straightens his back once the conversation steers in his direction. Meanwhile, Lo Jik continues feeling a glare on his back. Glancing in that direction, Lo Jik meets Mo Bei’s gaze, politely smiling at his Brother-in-Law.
‘Oh, he’s planning to kill me. Isn’t he?’ Lo Jik returns to stare ahead. ‘Well,’ he shrugs internally. ‘Don’t mind if I strike preemptively, Dear Brother-in-Law. It’s not like I’ll get an achievement with you around. Instead, killing Mo Bei and Chi Cheng using the Wolf Tide might reduce pressure on me due to a lack of competition, allowing me to advance to Peak Stage without others finding trouble with me.’
He considers all this as the three Clan Leaders stand and overlook the gathering. Gu Yue Bo announces the finalization of the Three-Clan-Alliance, issuing the start of the Gu Competition. Of course, he cautions the Gu Masters to stop before fatal attacks.
The Alliance always issues such a competition to help relieve the grudges between their other members. After all, they need to work together to survive the Wolf Tides.
The Alliance Slope descends into silence. Nobody wants to readily step out. What if they challenge someone and lose? It will be a humiliating experience for their clan.
Bai Ning Bing swept the competition the previous time, confidently dealing with her opponents. However, the Gu Master from the Bai Clan stepping out looks slightly hesitant as he walks over to the Gu Yue Clan’s region. He exhales sharply and recovers his composure. His team stands beside him as they meet the Gu Yue Clansmen’s gazes.
“Who is Gu Yue Lo Jik? Your wife, Mo Yan, cut my arm before! A husband shares his wife’s sins! Step out! I challenge you.”
Lo Jik blinks in surprise. Other Gu Masters hear these words, understanding the ‘reason’ behind them before parting, leaving an open path between the Bai Gu Master and an impassive Lo Jik.
“I’m Bai Shu Zhe! Face me!”
Lo Jik narrows his eyes, deciding to take the challenge. Mo Yan and her reputation are important to him. Publicly defending her is one of the best ways in Lo Jik’s arsenal to maintain their relationship. He may sound like a broken record here. However, his Trait provides many advantages when coupled with a stable relationship. After all, this world also has crazy gals like that Bai Zhong Shui, fucking men to feed her Gu. So, Lo Jik prefers Mo Yan over others.
He calmly steps out as others notice the difference between their sizes. Lo Jik is only eating healthy and growing taller and bulkier. His body is built like a fortress. Surely, muscles alone mean shit when Gu like Boar and Tiger Strength exist. However, his well-maintained physique displays his discipline and commitment to a healthy lifestyle.
Bai Shu Zhe sneers.
“So, you’re Gu Yue Lo Jik. Hmph, I will act the bigger man this once and let you off if you apologize.” He begins with malicious intentions. “Say these words—Mo Yan was wrong, and she deserves to be treated like the slut she is!” Shu Zhe evidently holds a deep grudge against Mo Yan, going as far as to publicly humiliate her. Still, Lo Jik agrees internally. His Mo Yan DOES deserves to be treated like the shameless slut she is!
Lo Jik smiles, “Which arm did she take, Brother Shu Zhe?”
The man chuckles coldly. “Brother? You are not my brother! Hmph, your wench took cut this arm—”
He raises his right arm when Lo Jik kicked!
They are still a distance away. However, a sharp Moonblade flies, reflecting the cold morning sun.
*Slash*
*Pfft*
A geyser of blood drenches the cold snow under their feet as Shu Zhe tumbles to his right, losing his right leg!
“AAAGGGGHHHHHH!”
“Ssh!” Lo Jik crosses the distance, placing his left bare feet against the man’s neck and silencing his scream. “Don’t shout, Brother Shu Zhe. It’s bad manners. See? Now you can remember me, too. Aren’t we couple great?”
The crowd is stunned before they explode. One of the elders from the Bai Clan screams. “Apprehend that shameless Junior! How dare he attack before any warning?!”
“Warning?” Lo Jik presses his feet against Shu Zhe’s neck, stopping others from approaching him as the Bai Gu Master spasms with his eyes rolling into his skull.
“He challenged me. The battle started already, you Dumb Fart. Did your mother drop you on your head?”
The Elder pales, unable to believe a boy half his age is insulting him. Fury boils in his veins as Lo Jik crouches to pick up the bleeding Shu Zhe. “Here!” He tosses the man several meters away. “Heal him, or let him die. Doesn’t matter to me.”
“You arrogant junior!” The elder seethes when another from the Gu Yue Clan retorts sharply.
“Who are you calling arrogant? Your Clan’s Gu Master was the arrogant one! How dare he try to insult Elder Mo Yan’s honor?”
While there are internal conflicts within any organization, the Elders unite against external forces. Mo Yan quietly stares at Lo Jik with slight fondness before darkly glancing at Shu Zhe.
“Did that just happen?!”
“This junior is too galling!”
“Shit! Didn’t Bai Ning Bing cut someone’s arm, too? That’s why the Xiong’s Clan Elder stepped to challenge her before losing his arm, too!”
Meanwhile, the Gu Masters of the Gu Yue Clan have a different conversation.
“This scene is familiar, right?”
“Hmm, am I seeing things?”
“Isn’t this like last time?”
Many gazes converge on Fang Zheng, who stares at the Bai Gu Elder reattaching Shu Zhe’s leg as Lo Jik returns to the crowd. Others sidestep, opening a path for him, feeling their hearts chill at the thick splashes of blood on his robes and a white leather boot on his left foot. Using the Moonglow Gu with his foot ruined his bamboo shoe, making him shamelessly take Shu Zhe’s leather shoe before tossing his leg to the Elder.
‘I wonder how long I can milk surprise attacks like that,’ Lo Jik muses, indifferent to the Clan Leaders’ awkward states. They want the three clans to unite, not further divide by grudges.
Fortunately, nobody pulls another stunt like Shu Zhe aiming to attack the reputation of a man’s wife.
On the other hand, Fang Yuan notices yet another change from the previous timeline aside from the competition between Lo Jik and Shu Zhe.
‘Xiong Li challenged me last time to diminish my record of driving away the River Swallowing Toad. However, Fang Zheng defeated him this time after he used the two Boar Gu. Xiong Li does not dare challenge someone with better feats. Heh, still, Fang Zheng is outstanding compared to my previous two lives. Unfortunately, others are wrong about comparing his cultivation with Bai Ning Bing.’
‘Fang Zheng had to give his all to reach the Peak Stage. However, Bai Ning Bing did her all to delay her cultivation and STILL reached Rank 3 in three years, further lowering her cultivation again to Rank 2.’
Some talents are unreasonable in this world!
***
Alternate Title: Hamlets Destroyed; Best Morning Routine; A Dutiful Mo Yan; Lewd Mornings; Using The Ghawk Ghawk Gu; Filled Throat; Mo Yan’s New Breakfast; An Elder’s Duty; 2 Months of Bliss; Alliance Slope; Big Snek; Massive Growth; An Elder’s Sugar Daddy; Gu Depreciation; Blood Gu?; Mo Yan and Shadows; Lost Shadow Gu; Kindness is Power’s Convenience; The Elders Grow; Improvements; A Gu Competition; Protecting His Woman’s Honor; One Takes an Arm and the Other Slices Legs; Fang Zheng’s PTSD; Shameless; Arrogant; Rebuking an Elder; Elders’ Support; A Shocking Exchange; Too Similar; Difference Between Fang Zheng and Bai Ning Bing; Comparatively Outstanding