Store in Danmachi: 52 (Patreon)

Title: Sophie’s Choice? No, We Have Lili’s Choice!

Much like other Guild Employees, Rehmer wears a black two-piece consisting of a vest over a white shirt with sleeves rolled up to his elbows and black gloves on his hand. The man wears small circle glasses for his farsightedness. He takes a moment to observe the store’s interior as Jackal sits alongside Eina, Rose, Misha, Lili, and a small pink-furred cat on the latter’s lap. The resident Ninja Husky remains as aloof and elusive as ever, perching on one of the stairs leading to the store’s upper floor.

The shelves behind the group and the counter reveal the current products, from the limited Goblin ‘potions’ sold exclusively to the Entertainment District to the most popular products—Butterfree Era and the Frollets. The rise of the latter’s popularity is due to the sudden increase in the price from 25000 to 100000 Valis. Others are still speculating the reason. But the other, more intuitive high-tier adventurers bought a few of them directly from the store, fearing another rise in the price. But Rehmer can see how slow Jackal’s business has become. He glances at the new products, too.

“No item from a Jack Bird?” He muses and looks at Jackal, “I find it hard to believe.”

Jackal works his jaw as Lili, sitting atop his lap, smacks the back of her head into his chest. She pouts and replies, “Jackal-sama won’t tell us what he created from the Jack Bird. But I think he has already told Miach-sama, Hermes, and Take-sama!”

It’s news to the other three women, who stare at Jackal questioningly until he clears his throat, “Why don’t you move from my lap?”

“We don’t have more chairs.”

“We can get them from Maria’s,” Jackal reasons. But his reasoning is met by an annoyed Pallum who had to see her Brute devalue his body on an impish devil of a Goddess and then invite other women as employees! She can have the lap, right? RIGHT?

“This is fine.”

“You’re just making Rehmer uncomfortable,” Jackal glances at his former supervisor.

“Am I?” Lili sharply inquires.

Rehmer believed he saw a glint of red flash cross Lili’s chestnut orbs.

“I’m quite comfortable,” Rehmer coughs, horridly uncomfortable with such a small stature presenting such vehement pressure.

“So?” Jackal grins, “What do you think? Pretty sweet place, right? If Guild annoys you, I’d be happy to employ you.”

Rehmer sighs as he looks at three of his most excellent juniors—and Misha.

“Uh, Leader? Why are you looking at me like that?” The pinkette cocks her head sideways.

“Ehm, nothing,” Rehmer shakes his head.

“I won’t be leaving Guild for a long while. The Guild raised me,” he smiles and looks at the group, “But it does get annoying. Like today. They sent me specifically to ask you three to return. Well, only Rose and Eina.”

Misha’s lips part as she pouts, “That’s just unfair!”

“I can offer Misha,” Jackal shrugs.

“Hey! I’m right here!”

Jackal smirks, shrugging, “Don’t worry. I offered you knowing they won’t accept you.”

“That sounds even more insulting!”

“Ok?” Jackal blinks. That’s the whole point—to haze the jubilant Pinkette.

“Jokes aside,” Rose calmly cuts in, “I don’t plan to return. It was just a job.”

Eina lowers her head, “We’re sorry, Rehmer-san. I plan to become Jackal’s exclusive advisor.” She glances in his direction with a short smirk, “He wouldn’t be such a mess that way.”

“I’ll let you know my plans are often impeccable,” Jackal scoffs.

“I have to agree with Eina-sama,” Lili cozies herself upon Jackal, laying her claim openly. “Conspiring against a Level 5 adventurer and making an enemy out of the Ishtar Familia doesn’t seem smart in the long run.”

Jackal snorts a chuckle, ruffling Lili’s hair until it’s a mess, “I guess my intelligence exceeds the collective IQ in this room.”

Even Loid takes offense to the statement as he looks up with a drawling whine.

“I expected such an answer,” Rehmer sighs. “You two wouldn’t take actions in half-measure.”

“And I would?” Misha complaints.

“It’s all in your Employee Reviews,” Rehmer replies.

“Can I have a copy?” Jackal inclines his head.

“He can’t!” Misha gasps, hurriedly shaking her head.

“It’s pretty much filled with how lazy she is and needs constant smacks on the back to complete her work,” Eina rolls her eyes.

“Smack to the back?” Jackal blinks before grinning, “I can do that!”

“But do you have any work right now?” Misha shoots back.

Her words get to Jackal as he slumps back on his chair while Lili lets out a small yelp before contracting her shoulders and closing her thighs. As others stare at her curiously, Lili averts her gaze, muttering with cheeks redder than a tomato, “It’s nothing.”

“Right,” Seeing it’s a good time to change the topic, Rehmer sharply exhales. “That is why I’m here—to notify Eina and Misha in person they need to move out of their Guild-provided residences in a week.”

“WHAT?” Misha and Eina snap at once, shock marring their pretty features as Rehmer sighs. “Jackal and Rose eventually bought their residences, but you two are still under the Guild’s contract. Yes, you had three months before, but the Guild can pay you valis for a reduced duration of notice.” He doesn’t mince his words, revealing that things are annoying on his end. “In essence, the middle tier of the Guild is annoyed by your actions. Or you can say, your ‘unruly’ affiliations with the recent controversy that is Jackal. His public executions are for Ishtar Familia to deal with, but chances are they are going to lay low.”

“But,” Misha chews her lips in frustration, “We cannot easily shift even if we get the money unless we move to locations as shady as Daedalus.”

Rehmer sighs and nods, “I know. I’m sorry. I wish I could help out.”

“Maybe,” Misha blinks before her head eerily snaps in her Senpai’s direction. “Jackal-Senpai!” She whines loudly, “Your junior—”

“Sure,” Jackal shrugs without issues, “My second floor is mostly empty since Lili sleeps with me. But it can get a little congested. And I cook late, around 2 in the morning, so you’ll have to deal with the noise.”

The room falls eerily silent as Jackal continues petting Anya on Lili’s lap. He rests his chin atop Lili’s head, “There’s also another bathroom for you guys to use on the second floor. But don’t clog it. I ain’t fixing that.”

“What?” He notices the silence as Eina and Misha have red dusting their cheeks. The latter smiles coyly, “I have to hand it to Jackal Senpai! You don’t miss a chance, do you?”

“Yeah?” Jackal tilts his head, transforming into the adorable gemling-sharing brute Lili saw for the first time. “Why won’t I help when I can?”

“Hnauu!” Lili whines adorably, “Eina-sama is right. You need guidance, Jackal-Sama.”

“What are they on about?” Jackal frowns when a deity bursts into the store with a grin.

“I believe I can explain what happened~!” Hermes bows dramatically before flashing a knowing grin in Eina’s direction, “For I, Hermes, heard it all!”

“Oh, you’re back,” Jackal mutters. “Well, I heard you breathing against the door. I didn’t know how much longer you planned to eavesdrop.”

“Ah-Hahahaha!” Hermes laughs through the shame and looks around. “No chairs? Whose lap am I sitting on? Hmm~! Rehmer, how kind?” Hermes chuckles as Rehmer yelps like an actual canine before stumbling out of his chair, “You can take the chair, Hermes!”

“That was always the plan!” Hermes winks and takes the seat for himself as Rehmer shakes his head. “That’s all why I’m here for. Eina, and Misha, you two have three days.”

The Team Supervisor bids his farewell. Jackal returns his attention to Hermes, “So? What was all that about?”

Hermes’ smile broadens as he clears his throat, “Well, the two—”

“Get out!” Eina snaps as she stands from her chair, hand smacking the counter simultaneously as the blush on her cheeks deepens.

“Ooh? How scary.” Hermes chuckles and raises his hands in surrender, thickening the misunderstanding with all his Godly charms, “The girls are worried the Butcher will let loose his primal urges on them in lieu of their rents~!”

‘... If only.’ Lili thinks internally with a pout as Anya looks up, her green eyes rounding in shock and horror!

“Whoa!” Jackal frowns. “I’m not into that. But you can stay until you find another place. Or, you know, you can stay with Rose.”

Eina and Misha look at each other as Hermes shrugs.

“If you guys can delay discussing your living arrangement, I would love to have a word with Jackal.”

“Why? Is it because of something you cannot share with us?” Lili blinks, “Something like the item from Jack Bird?”

“Exactly that,” Hermes teasingly smiles as Jackal rolls his eyes. “You guys should stay. Again, my doors are always open for you guys. Hermes and I will talk elsewhere.”

He picks Lili from under her pits as she yelps again before setting her back on the chair as he walks out with a wave of his hand. As Hermes leaves the store before him, Jackal looks back with a grin, “But now that I think about it, if you two live with me, I would have the mind to exact rent in kind~!”

He then looks at Lili, nodding and crushing her budding hopes, “Not from you, rest assured. I pay you with Living and food.”

‘Damn!’ Lili scowls, chewing her lips in annoyance.

As Jackal leaves, the group hears an impish snicker, “I call Jackal Senpai’s house!”

“You can’t ‘call’ it!” Eina frowns. “And… Rose-san, can we crash into your place?”

Rose looks at the group, her pale yellow, wolfish pupils simmering with blank curiosity as she tilts her head, “What place?”

That sounds a lot more ominous to Lili as she imagines her worst nightmare!—Sharing HER Brute’s Living Space with her co-workers. And Lili can see it in their eyes. They are just as shameless as herself when they want to be. After all, Lili never even took a chance to look elsewhere for her stay, even after Miach offered her a room.

Is it Karma?

Lili doesn’t believe so!

It’s all on her Jackal-Sama!

‘And then there’s that Weretiger Skank eyeing him since morning!’

---

Jackal and Hermes return to Maria’s orphanage before assembling with Maria and Asfi in the living room as Take takes the absence of his Familia to perform training drills on the rest of the orphanage. Now that Takemikazuchi Familia doesn’t have to enter the dungeon with a desperate urge for money since they earn by training Jackal, Lili, and the rest of the orphanage, the group is taking slow and perfecting their tactics before thinking of delving deeper. Ouka has leveled up to Level 2, but he alone cannot get past the tribulations of Floor 12 and monsters like Silverbacks and Hard Armoreds!

“So?” Asfi inquires. “Was our wounded guest speaking the truth?”

“An elf attacked her,” Hermes nods as he looks at Jackal, “But do you really believe Olal could do something like that?”

“Olal had a companion alongside him, right?” Jackal shrugs. “I don’t know who that person is, but they were an animalkin under the hood. I don’t know which kind. But it feels too simple, even for Olal, after he pulled the stunt of using the Guild and a majority of Orario against me. I still had to make sure.”

Hermes taps his chin in contemplation while Maria sighs in relief, “She is a good girl. I talked with her. She told me she is from Kalos Desert and made a journey here to find a good Familia.”

“For what it’s worth, I don’t sense deceit from her words,” Hermes shrugs. “But your situation expects you to remain cautious. There are many ways to get around a Deity’s sense of deception.”

Jackal frowns, evidently on edge.

“So, she is another bum,” Jackal begins after a while. “What do you want to do, Maria-san?” He looks at the woman. “You’re the one who wanted to help her. It’s your decision to have her leave or stay.”

Maria nods. She doesn’t let benevolence blind her from reality. If that were the case, Maria would not have advised Asfi against using the potion on their guest and letting her clean the wounds using simpler materials.

“Before you decide anything, did she tell you how her opponent looked?” Asfi questions as Maria shakes her head.

“No, aside from his ears, she failed to see anything of value.”

Jackal stares at Hermes, “Aren’t you still in contact with ‘him’—Everyone’s Ally? Why don’t you ask him? I will sweeten our deal.”

Hermes smirks shamelessly, “I tried locating Olal before I interrupted Shakti’s morning. Did you know she wears pajamas instead of some thin lingerie—”

“Please remain on the point,” Maria frowns.

The Deity mocks a sad sigh before concluding, “Olal is hiding. I think Ishtar will try venting her anger on Olal before you—since you have a Level 5 ‘ally.’

Jackal snickers, pleased that his plan to isolate Olal is working well.

The matron lowers her head, green eyes flickering contemplatively.

“She said her reason for leaving the Desert was her younger brother’s death. I-”

“She is also an assassin,” Asfi narrows her eyes, interjecting, “You saw those golden needles, right? That’s not an average adventurer’s weapon. And she must be skilled in using those needles if she braved her journey alone. She said it herself—I reached Orario without anyone’s help—easily seeing through our apprehensions as if we thought her to be a spy or something.”

Maria thins her lips, understanding that Asfi is making things clear—objectively.

“But she easily mingled with the kids, did half the chores, and doesn’t strike me as a person who is bad.”

Since Asfi is burdened with the Orphanage’s protection until Olal leaves Orario, she looks into Matron’s eyes unflinchingly, “I’m not saying she is a bad person. I’m emphasizing she isn’t free of risks. We know nothing about her. And you have children as young as four years of age living here. Who knows when another incompetent parent leaves their child in front of your doorstep?”

“Ouch?” Hermes cringes slightly, empathizing more with incompetent parents than their poor children.

Maria falters under Asfi’s gaze. Her children are a deeper part of her life than a ‘well-behaved’ girl from another land.

The tension thickens in their surrounding as Maria’s gaze darts between the three faces around her.

It’s not long before she sighs and nods. “I will ask her to leave.”

Jackal groans at this time, grumbling under his breath. “Fuck, man. It’s the same as Lili’s situation.”

He may be a lot of things—sappy, NOT one of them—but he realizes how similar this situation is.

It’s ‘Lili’s Choice’ again.

Either Maria takes the risk and listens to her heart, or she accepts reason and curbs her emotions due to helplessness more than anything else. Jackal wasn’t helpless when it came to Lili’s situation. He just lent her to Naaza for a day or two before giving her a spot in her home, just the same way he offered a roof to Eina and Misha, not knowing Rose has lost her house out of no-fucking-where!

“Don’t you need a stealthy weretigress in your Familia?” Jackal questions.

“We do,” Asfi nods, “And she might have agreed before Hermes tried to peek at her during her bath.”

Jackal stares at Hermes deeply, “Was she hot?”

“Jackal!” Maria gasps, pounding a fist into his shoulder with a huff. “You’re becoming as worse as Hermes!”

“He was never any good,” Asfi narrows her eyes. “No man with dreams as ludicrous as a Harem is any good.”

“You think ‘good’ men can have Harem?” Jackal sneers. “No! You have to use every trick you know for your dreams!”

“Exactly!”

Hermes nods eagerly. Hope flickers in his eyes as he looks at the mortal child. “Just like that, Jackal! Achieve your dreams! A Mortal’s life is only as bright as their dreams!”

Jackal nods resolutely, “I hear you.”

“So do I, Child.”

“Are you done?” Asfi rolls her eyes, “Because we have important things to discuss than some degrading morals between peeping perverts.”

“Hey, I never peek,” Jackal frowns and looks at Asfi. “I never peek unless I have explicit permission. So don’t bunch me with other perverts. I’m not the same!”

“How graceful of you,” Maria gives him a sidelong glance as he exhales, “About that girl. If you really want her around, and if she agrees, how about I share Lili’s room with her? She can help around in the orphanage during the day. As you say, she is good with children, and Ouka won’t always clean their diapers after the duration of the bet ends. And you can use your free time to train or… whatever you’d like to do.”

“Whatever I’d like…” Maria mutters under her breath before frowning, “But you will—”

“I’ll be fine,” Jackal shrugs. “I ain’t worried about some weretiger without falna. You guys must have used Status Thief on her, right?”

Asfi flinches before shooting the man an annoyed glance as Hermes shrugs, “Who knows~?”

Jackal rolls his eyes, questioning, “So, who’s going to tell her?”

“I will,” Maria nods before looking at Jackal, “Thank you. I don’t know how else I can show my appreciation.”

“Go out with me,” his words fly quicker than his brain registers the notion as he blinks before grinning, “When you have any free time to spare!”

The surroundings still Maria keep on staring at Jackal before silently standing and leaving the orphanage to talk to their guest. And while her face shows nothing, the tip of the woman’s ear starts turning red, with heat flushing her cheeks! Her vision threatens to swim, and butterflies flutter in her stomach before she pouts.

‘What? Should I just fall into someone’s harem?’ And seeing how Jackal scored a Goddess like Loki, she couldn’t help but feel slight apprehension at the notion of Jackal getting ‘bored’ of her after a while. But his words still leave her in a mess.

“You’re unbelievably crude,” Asfi narrows her eyes.

“See? Would a Good Man do that?” Jackal smirks victoriously. The notion of Eina living with him and breaching the prospect of dating in Maria’s mind already made his day complete—if only he could get into the dungeon for an hour or two. Or make a huge sale—

“My compensation?” Hermes smiles, prying Jackal out of his thoughts as he looks at the smiling Deity, tossing a frollet in his direction. “Return the Frollet to me after you take the content.”

“What is it?” Asfi questions, glancing at Jackal again while his words continue ringing in her head about the fallacy of being a ‘good’ man.

“Oh, nothing,” Hermes blinks, pocketing the package in his personal frollet before Asfi can snatch it out of his hands.

The woman frowns harder and stares at Jackal, inquiring, “What was that?”

“A good product,” he shrugs, leaving Asfi in confusion. “And if you find it out, just know Hermes is the one to blame.”

“Ah! Don’t throw me under the blame!”

“What was it?” Asfi takes hold of Hermes’ shoulder as he shakes his head violently. “Child, stop! The answer may scar you!”

“Hermes-SAMA,” Asfi stares intensely, “What is it?”

“Thou shan’t have thy answers!”

---

Hephaestus stares at the Deity sitting in front of her desk, legs crossed and set on the edge of her table. Like other Deities, despite the ugly envy in his green pupils, the passionate smile on the dark-skinned Deity’s lips makes him stand out in terms of beauty and raw sexual magnetism—close to Miach and Takemikazuchi. His neck-long bright green hair scatters over his head, untamed. Hephaestus’ lone crimson eye matches the Deity’s green orbs as she clears her throat.

“I told you, I will never recreate weapons like Crimson Splitter. My foolishness and eagerness at the time made me forget mortals shouldn’t wield weapons tainted with a speckle of divinity.”

“Liar,” the God hisses, but still continues smiling. “Why favor a mortal? Make weapons for my Familia! Or do you scorn us just because I lent a helping hand to mortals suffering in the darkness of this accursed city?”

“Zelus,” the Crimson Goddess groans, “For the last time, nobody knows how to create weapons like Crimson Splitter other than Divine Blacksmiths like Goibniu and me. Pester him if you want one. But his reply will be the same. Magical weapons of that stature have no place in the world of mortals. Besides, that weapon was a failure. It couldn’t even get through a meter into the Behemoth’s skin before its effects faded and the weapon shattered into ashes.”

“Similar to how that Butcher’s weapon shattered into ashes!” Zelus seethes, punctuating Jackal’s name with scorching anger, “How dare a mere mortal create such a spectacle?! And who’s his Familia? You know of the rumors, right? Someone familiar with your weapon must have recreated the Crimson Splitter if it isn’t you! Make one for me, and I’ll find out if the rumors are true or not! I will end the budding hope of THAT Familia before they can emerge again!”

Hephaestus clicks her tongue. “No. Now leave.”

But Zelus doesn’t budge.

He stares at Hephaestus for a while before his eyes focus on her eyepatch. “How could someone as filthy as you ever deserve so much?”

“Oye,” Tsubaki narrows her eye, “I’ll give you one chance to apologize before I cut your arms off.”

“Am I wrong?” Zelus stares at Tsubaki intently. “Why must the Ugly have all of it? Jackal, you, cunts like Loki and Freya—Why?” His green eyes border a sense of fanaticism, “You should just lower your head and accept whatever demands I have!”

“Or what?” Hephaestus calmly arches her left eyebrow. “What can you do aside from insulting me? That I slept with you that one time and you saw my right eye?” She leans back in her seat. “What new can you do aside from that? Leave, Zelus. I didn’t craft Crimson Splitter for Jackal, and I won’t craft one for you either.”

Zelus grits his jaws before snorting. Before he steps past the door, he turns back to look at Hephaestus, “Whether you like it or not, it’s your weapon that ended Ishtar’s Captain, and we all know it. So, you either stand with us or against us. And know this some Deities never enjoy Heathens like that Butcher.”

“What a dick!” Tsubaki curses under her breath. She judges her divine friend, “And your taste in men was shitty!”

“And some women,” Hephaestus shrugs. “I was in a pretty bag place. But enough about that. What do you think of Zelus’ words?”

“We should raid his Familia and end the nuisance once and for all!”

The Goddess shakes her head, “About Jackal. How do you think he got the Crimson Splitter?”

Tsubaki shrugs.

“Don’t know, and he wouldn’t tell us even if we asked. But do you think the rumors are true?”

Hephaestus blinks before shaking her head.

“Not at all. But if THAT Familia existed, they would have snatched Jackal in a heartbeat whether he wanted or not.”

Tsubaki snickers as Hephaestus tosses her an annoyed look. “Do you think this is funny? Zelus is a madman.”

“You should have let me attack him,” Tsubaki counters.

“And it would encourage his unscrupulous Familia to attack us with every underhanded means they know,” Hephaestus sighs. “And Zelus is right. To his Familia, he is a savior. So, if I forced him to Tenkai here, his Familia would return under the guise of another Underground Deity.”

Tsubaki grumbles under her breath. “Again. What a dick!”

---

“So?” Red eyes assess the tall and lanky Zelus in his black jacket and trousers. A dull lamp illuminates the interior of a spacious dungeon room. Aside from a small bed, Olal’s current residence has a giant metal-plated cage covering a good portion of the room. Odd thumps and beastly sniffs echo from the interior of the cage.

“She denies her role in the reappearance of the Crimson Splitter,” Zelus narrows his eyes, “And I believe her. As Ugly as she can be, she has some mind to remain honest.”

“Maybe,” Olal narrows his eyes. “But do you care if she speaks the truth or not? Jackal stopped your mating rituals with the weapon created by Hephaestus. And you know very well how great I am in the assessment of one’s character. Do you want someone like Jackal laying Hephaestus?”

Zelus’ expression flickers as Olal continues, “As ugly as Hephaestus is, the way you put it, why must a mortal experience the same sensations a Divine like you has?”

The Deity’s expression grows uglier as Olal laughs faintly. “But it’s up to you. I only need your Familia’s help—”

“You will have my assistance if you capture Hephaestus.”

Olal frowns. He is well-versed in the ways of speaking to a God, so Zelus doesn’t lack trust in the mortal human without any Falna.

“But—”

“Not buts! I want Hephaestus and Jackal to pay the price of their arrogance! Do it anyway!”

Olal nods as Zelus stomps his way out.

‘Huff, it’s not even fun with how easy it was,’ Olal shrugs before walking closer to the steel prison.

He quietly takes out a slip of paper from his pocket as he gazes at the steel cage delivered by the Zelus Familia for a ‘mysterious’ benefactor.

—Use this product well. I need some data. Keep it hungry, and it’s trained to listen to one command of the owner using the command crystal. The rest is up to you. You know who I am, and we can be better friends.—

Olal slides the tiny slot of the prison to see a pair of deep-green scleras surrounding neon green irides and pitch-black pupils open up with a beastly snort!

The mustache man’s smirk widens as he closes the viewing slot.

“Good stuff. Only time will tell if it’s the most sophisticated suicide or a rebellion against fate.” He touches the peacock feather pendant around his neck before returning to his bed—waiting. He will wait for as long as it takes.

***

Alternate Title: Sophie’s Choice—Lose Something Important, Lili’s Choice—Earn Everything From Legal Loli to Eager Amazons!; Bums Are Homeless, I Repeat, Bums Are Homeless—Send In the Eagle to Swoop The Harem; New Roommates—Lili’s Worst Nightmare; Let Lili Have Her Lap!; Lili Use Establish Domination, She Sits On the Lap *Hnaauuuu~!*—It Fails, Lili Feels Hot and Tingly; Anya Scared for Many Reasons Only She Knows; Misha Calls Jackal’s House, So Does Eina… So Does Rose; House? What House? This Wolf is a Bum—Rose, Probably; Jackal About to Pornhub the Rent—Misha Stuck in the Washing Machine, Eina Asking for Some Plumbing, and Rose Acting Like A Snobbish Roommate?; Lili? She Gets Paid in Living and Food; Lili Will Remain Safe—Frustratingly So; Jackal Denies the Goodness of his Heart for Maria’s Booty!; Jackal—But I Want More, I Know I Shouldn’t. *Hermes Looks at the Twisted Seed*: Please, I beg you. Use my Knowledge and Revive the Ancient Romance of Mankind—The Greatest Harem!; Hermes is Everyone’s(Nobody’s) Ally; The Good Tigress?; Jackal’s Room Floods With Women, Needs Immediate Piping!; Jackal Takes a Leap of Faith to Demand a Date—It’s Successful, Mommy Maria is a Happy Mess!; Asfi’s Curiosity; The Mysterious Jack Bird Item; Hermes Fighting for His Life as Jackal Tosses Him Under the Bus; Jackal: Was She Hot? Hermes: Hotter Than the Flames You Cook With; The God of Envy and Zeal; Zelus’ The Chinese Young Master?; Olal Really Understands Human Nature; The Mysterious Benefactor; The Green-Eyed Gift; Zelus Is Too Damn Easy; Hephaestus’ Tastes are Sus; You Know It’s Bad When A Tsubaki Judges You!