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hello loves

greetings from waiheke. still in full-on moving mode...they call "moving" here "shifting" which....i love. yes - i'm SHIFTING. 

we're still in boxes and settling and disorientation mode, but i managed to record 18 minutes of thoughts this morning before ash woke up. i am loving sending you these messages. it reminds me of back in the day where we used to leave friends long, rambling answering phone messages. remember those?

listen here on the embed or download/listen on soundcloud:

https://soundcloud.com/amandapalmer/voiceramble-feb-4-2021

quick housekeeping: i'm still pretty much offline until ash starts school, but as of next week i'll hopefully be back in the saddle. 

and if you want to see a few seconds of me at karoaoke last night attempting to sing "never enough:' from "the greatest showman" at the local lawn bowling club (it's like the new zealand equivalent of a UK working man's club)....seek no further: https://www.instagram.com/p/CK01BLvp_nN/

i also sang "my way" by frank sinatra and began to slowly win the approval of my local postman. nick. all is going according to plan.

an addendum to the voiceramble,...i met our landlords today. an irish woman who married a kiwi and they came here twenty-five years ago and are currently living on a boat...oh my lord, the stories. it's amazing, actually, how much meeting them and hearing the stories of their home changed this place. 

see you all soon.

i love you.

xxAFP

 

 

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Comments

Anonymous

Oh “Shifting!” We shifted yesterday.

Anonymous

I love the NZ bush. Fave quote from Katherine Mansfield, "There is no twilight in our New Zealand days, but a curious half-hour when everything appears grotesque — it frightens — as though the savage spirit of the country walked abroad and sneered at what it saw." I'm not sure about the sneering, but I guess she meant the bush is eternal and the human layer is tolerated. Live within in with a prepared spirit, and it will meet you half-way.

Kate Michmerhuizen

As always, I love the voice rambles. Feelings right now...so hard to articulate. My mom died, I haven't been able to write her obituary. I just can't do it. Every day I get up with a huge list of things to do and then I sit down and I can't even remember where the list is. I only feel ok when I'm working in my art journal, zoom talking with my friends or watching a great show with my husband and dog. It's a strange new life. Maybe it's not all bad. I miss my mom terribly but I also could never wish that her lonely existence in long term care would have been extended. We saw her as much as possible but that wasn't enough and we weren't allowed to touch her. I read to her and sang with her and fed her her lunch but those visits were short and far between. How could I wish for that to drag on? My best friend gave me a gift when she said that she thought everything happened exactly as it was meant to happen. Why? because that's the way it happened. The birds in the background of your voice ramble are medicine.

Anonymous

Litening to your voice rambles reminds me of getting small voice messages from my best friend in Australia 😌 It must be a strange disconnect from the outside world being there when all your loved ones are far away dealing with their ‘own bowl of shit. I feel a little bit like that as I live in rural area - and you are spot on with why the woods are scary!! I am happy you find moments of joy and pleasure - recognize them and catalog every detail you can in your mind for later ❤️

Nikki Mierjeski

Both my parents tested positive for Covid this week. This little ramble just helped me shift from "losing it" to "handling it". I'm hoping it's just a mild case, that they get better, and then I can try to keep pushing towards "enjoying it" again. ❤️

Anonymous

My brother moved to Auckland about 8 years ago from the UK. I relate to this so much. Hearing you talk about the kiwis and how covid is on the edge of their lives, but also you hearing everyone you know going thru it. That's my brother. We are all truly mashed up together in some way. 💕

Anonymous

"This weird dance of life" this past year ... feels more like a crawl than a dance :( Also, I feel drawn to the idea of living on an island away from it all. I've always felt drawn to this sort of idea though, pandemic or not. Which makes me think of a book recommendation: Swamp Angel, a short Canadian classic by Ethel Wilson. (Sorry for the randomness, rambling in tune with your rambling) ... Also also, I now know why I like those voice rambles so much. They feel grounding, an invitation to sit down, pause and listen, let my own thoughts surface and go where they want. Thank you!

Anonymous

I know many here in NZ who deliberately avoid 'bad news', haven't a clue what's happening with covid, don't even keep up with local covid news. They avoid overseas friends / forums because they 'don't need the negativity'. The same ones who deny the brain damage I have caused by a stroke 3 years ago, telling me I seem perfectly normal to them, when I mention struggling to find the right words when speaking or writing. They live with the intent of avoiding negativity and pain and denying sadness. I, on the other hand, have to stop myself obsessing, have had to force myself to check international covid figures no more than once a day. To restrain myself from yelling at people who don't scan. I shudder and shrink from strangers, and some days even from friends and family. I went to see L.A.B. in New Plymouth (Brooklands Bowl is The Best music venue in NZ, you have to go there!) along with 12,000 others and spent most of my time crying with joy and terror and gratitude and guikt and so so so much sadness. I came to your Hastings concert and cried as I watched, with a young friend from New York messaging me as she watched the live broadcast. It's hard to comprhend how many feelings can be felt at the same time. And this is me, living in comfort, able to see my family and friends and do whatever the fuck I want, more or less. I feel guilty for feeling so much, when others have so much more to feel about. Fuck - you did a voice ramble and now I'm doing a written ramble....

Anonymous

I hope Ash has a great first day at school on Tuesday, it’s the start of one of life’s greatest adventures.

Anonymous

Crawl back into yourself Warm your bones Write yourself a love poem Welcome yourself home Be kind to your body It has won so many wars (Ijeoma Umebinyuo) Have a good start in your new home ❤

Anonymous (edited)

Comment edits

2023-03-08 22:20:32 I love these, and the birds are <3
2021-02-07 04:21:34 I love these, and the birds are <3

I love these, and the birds are <3

Julia Mason

Love the voice rambles, especially love the birds! (Birds like forests.). How big are the trees?