Pawprints in the Sand (Patreon)

Janus sat down facing the sea, leaning back against the dry sand dune that marked the edge of the beach. His sigh was a deep one, not the kind someone makes when they have walked far, or the kind of noise uttered at an impressive sight. It was a long, drawn out exhale from the deepest part of his lungs. Looking upwards to the blue sky, his spoken wondering might have been to the rabbit, or the sky. Even he didn't really know. 

"I don't know how you do it Jane. How does anyone just keep on going like this?"

There was a small pause before she replied, the rabbit sounding almost exasperated. "I told you, I'll be here for you as long as I can. I told you it changes nothing between us."

Janus groaned and his paws went to his face, the wolf closing his eyes as he rubbed his muzzle and forehead to relieve his tension, moving one paw to an ear to provide a little self petting there. "That's easy for you to say. You're not the one who screwed it all up. We were friends Jane, better then friends. And now... And now I don't even know how you can call me that. The way I've been, what I said, I just...  how can someone be so stupid?"

The grey rabbit sighed at the question, knowing the reasoning all too well. "Look Janus, depression is a hell of a thing, but you can't let it beat you. It makes you say things about yourself you don't, that you shouldn't believe. Is it really so hard to believe it makes you say the same about people looking after you, about your friends? I know you didn't mean the things you say, god knows being close friends with a wolf just to use the canine for selfish protection would be a stupid thing, self defeating even. That's just the depression talking, trying to justify the lack of self worth. You know how I feel about you, I mean look at you, you kept your figure and wits, how many can say that in our village?"

The insider joke worked, if marginally. The brown wolf gave a small whuff of a single laugh, much like a hiccup, almost spat out from it's unexpectedness. Jane really hit the nail on the head as it were: the village never did recover well from the mixing blood with pirates and their insane traits, with most of the population keeping their wits or the physique. For some reason it was rarely the two, and the rabbit suspected this might be partly Janus' problem, the constant fear of going bonkers, loosing his mind a bit. Ironically, it seems that was what made him loose a bit of his grip. Jane knew full well her own attempts at her waistline being anything more healthy then "soft" were doomed to failure.

Wiping an eye, he looked down "You really think we can make it, that we can go the whole distance?" He asked hopefully.

The answer was calculated. Sure, Jane didn't know what the future held, but times like this you don't offer those types of thoughts. "Well.. I've made it this far with you, I see no reason I can't make the whole way there with you. I'm sure if we get far enough we can even get some help, I mean actual proper help. Not like that jackass jackal with his snide comments who pretends to be your friend."

The sigh Janus made this time was a shorter one, thinking hard about it all, about his situation, about Jane. Leaning back against the dune bank, the warm sand felt nice against his back, enough to make him dozy, even briefly just napping off his worries. Staring up to the sky he pondered a moment longer before closing his eyes. "I'm sure you're right Jane. It just.. times like this it feels like I'm alone now."

"Yeah I know what you mean, you big lump of canine fluff. But hey, take a look back at the tracks in the sand, all across the beach we've been walking along this morning, back and forth. There's your paw prints, and right with them are mine. I am with you the whole way."

Opening his eyes, as Janus gaze moved from the sky to the beach, his eyes followed the pawprint tracks they made shortly before. Some had been wiped away by the action of the seaside, but they were still largely there. He gave a small sigh. "Yeah, you're right I guess. But hey I'm on to you, to quote that metaphor I know you're using what about where there is only one set of tracks. You saying you carried me then?"

Sighing, Jane rolled her eyes. "Janus, you big oaf. Of course not! That's when you got your depressive tail into comfort eating mode and swallowed me whole. Now, seriously, can we get moving back to the village? I'm still pretty sure we can make it there together, but the wetness in here is both making me numb and tingly."

Janus gave a small 'urrp under his breath before his small "...Oh. Right."