Toon It Up: Cure What Ails Moo Preview (Patreon)

A preview for our new Patron story of the month, this time with toon antics.



“Another sugar coma! We need pixie sticks and fast!!”

“Aww man, Mr. Bounce-a-roo! What did I tell you about hopping super high in your apartment again?”

“Danks, doc! I’s promise I’s stick ta mah diet dis time! Ten pizzas per day naow, fors sure!”

Riri looked around her. She was way in over her head. Why am I here again?

“ACHOO!” A gloved hand next to her handed her a tissue. She took it and blew before rubbing her eyes. Riiiiight, that.

Hay fever stunk. Sure, there were far worse things than she could get. She knew that well from experience sadly. However, this year, hay fever was worse than ever. It felt like she couldn’t stop sneezing, rubbing her eyes, wiping her nose, or combination of all. She needed relief.

Taking another tissue from the gloved individual, Riri internally groaned. She had a problem that needed help. She couldn’t wait this out. It was going to drive her insane.

Problem was, her options were… limited. She had no doctor, no insurance. No way she could afford a basic visit to the hospital in her area. Forget the walk-in clinic; way too busy among other reasons she wanted to avoid it.

And thus, she was here. This was not a place she wanted to be, feeling out of her element on so many levels. Yet, she didn’t have much of a choice. She needed help now.

“Helloooooooooo Miss James!” Riri flinched, nearly dropping her many tissues. The voice came in loud, pippy, and high. “We’re reeeeady for you! You ready to feel good or possibly okay or are you ready to feel super good or average okay?”

Before her, a tall squirrel toon lady stood. She had bright green neon fur with huge buck teeth and a big floofy tail. The lanky toon looked at her eagerly, eyeing her up in a way that made the human feel very awkward.

Riri gulped. “L-listen, I’m sure… you’re, like, very nice, but I don’t know if ACHOO!” She let out another snotty sneeze, splattering the toon. The squirrel did not flinch, pulling out a towel from behind her back and wiping her face. Wiping made odd, squeaky noises like she was wiping a car window.

“That sounded like a yes to me!” The toon nurse declared, grabbing Riri by the hand and pulling her along towards a door.

“H-hey! Easy there! I don’t-”

“Don’t worry, Nurse Bushy-Tail is the best nurse we’s got here!” The fat pig toon that was passing Riri tissues said. “Youse’ll be feelin’ better in no time!”

Riri frowned, her face getting all red… even beyond the reddishness surrounding her eyes. Perhaps going to the toon hospital wasn’t her best idea.