A Mythical Match Up III, Part III (Patreon)

Absolute silence followed. Both Girgnasharak and Coskitrask looked up at Nathan, grinning toothily. Even the kobold servants paused in their duties. A few exchanged nervous, uncertain glances. One of them put down the jug of wine it was carrying and took a step towards the door.

"Stay where you are," said Saskalisssundra sternly without turning her head.

The kobold froze, then slowly turned and stood at attention.

"No one will leave the dining hall until we are finished," said Saskalisssundra. She looked around the dining room at the assembled servants. Her gaze was like a scythe. "None of you will speak of anything that is uttered here today to our daughter. Or anyone else for that matter."

Nathan felt a lump growing in his scaly throat.

"H-How long did you know?" he murmured. He sat back in his seat; the wave of dread that had just passed through him had left him dizzy.

"Oh, from the very beginning," said Saskalisssundra. "Incidentally, was playacting a Draco yours or my daughter's idea?"

Nathan's lips tightened. He wasn't even sure he could form a cogent response now. It felt as though the floor had crumbled beneath him and he was plummeting into a dark, possibly fathomless abyss.

"Well?" snorted Girgnasharak, pounding the table. "Answer my wife, whelp!"

Nathan's frazzled brain finally stirred to life. Should he lie or tell the truth?

There was clearly tension - and a history of tension - between Melinanatha and her parents. They would not be surprised or seriously offended if it had been Melinanatha's idea. If it had been his idea, it might make him look like a coward, a schemer and a liar. If it had been Melinanatha's idea, he was merely capitulating to their daughter in another one of her games.

"It was her idea," admitted Nathan, still feeling ashamed for selling Melinanatha out, even a little.

"Oh dear," sighed Saskalisssundra, shaking her head. "Did she really think word of this 'Mythic Matches' hadn't reached the Eesek Mountains? It is quite the talk in many courts throughout the Eastern Kingdom and beyond."

"I've heard tell the Eastern Regent Himself encourages his subjects to explore it," said Girgnasharak.

Saskalisssundra glared at her husband before continuing.

"To put such time and effort in this charade," she said. "Incidentally, your posture needs work and you neglected to fold your napkin properly," she added, addressing Nathan.

Nathan silently cursed. He actually knew what she was talking about too.

"Hah!" laughed Girgnasharak. "If that is the only criticism my beloved wife can level at you, you did quite well, not-Draco from another world!"

"Girgnasharak!" hissed Saskalisssundra.

"Oh be fair, flower of my heart," said Girgnasharak reasonably. "Was this...human any worse than some of the courtiers in Burerik? Hah, what of the parlor at Ssan'dro-Esheric? Remember those fops? Compared to them he was as regal and well-mannered as a royal herald. And I do not usually notice such trivialities."

Saskalisssundra scowled but did not seem inclined to refute him.

"Yes, we are aware there are no Draco in this other world," said Girgnasharak. "Only humans...some kind of elf, yes?"

"Uh..." said Nathan.

"Only one race," said Saskalisssundra, cocking her head. "Perhaps there were others and your kind slaughtered them?" she asked mildly.

"What? No, no not at all!" blurted Nathan. "There's...only one sapient species evolved on Earth. That's just the way it happened."

"Earth? What a boring name."

"Er...some people call it Gaea or...Terra."

"That sounds better," said Saskalisssundra, nodding in approval.

There was an awkward pause.

"I...I gotta know," said Nathan nervously. "If you knew I wasn't a Draco-"

"Why did we play along?" supplied Saskalisssundra. "To indulge our daughter, for one. She grows so...tiresome when her little schemes are exposed. For another, to see how you, outsider, would fare under unexpected and trying circumstances. We did not expect this magical chicanery, however."

"H-Hold on," said Nathan. "Melinanatha said the letter you sent her...it made her think you thought I was a Draco."

"Hmm? Oh, yes, the wording in the missive was somewhat ambiguous, upon reflection," said Saskalisssundra.

The diabolic glimmer in her cold blue eyes made it clear to Nathan that the ambiguity was far from accidental.

"So...what happens now?" said Nathan slowly. "You're...um...w-w-what's going-"

"Stop whimpering," said Girgnasharak. "If we wanted you dead, your corpse would already be hanging from the castle walls."

"Uh..." Nathan gulped.

Girgnasharak looked over at his wife, who, in turn glanced over at Coskitrask, who nodded, put down his utensils and spoke.

"We merely wish to learn the nature of your relationship with Melinanatha," said Coskitrask, his voice calm, soft and supremely confident. "Do you intend to wed her?"

Nathan swallowed. Again, his mind raced - tell the truth, and if so, how much of it?

"Yes," he croaked eventually.

"Very well. Why?"

"Huh?" said Nathan, taken aback.

"Why do you wish to marry my daughter?" said Saskalisssundra.

"Uh..."

"The truth, if you don't mind," said Coskitrask.

Nathan realized he was shaking. He gripped the table as though to steady himself.

"Allow me," said Coskitrask with a sigh. "To protect her from my evil designs. To stop me from seizing the domain." He paused. "This is the fable she impressed upon you, yes?"

"Yeah," said Nathan, nodding miserably.

"I fear she may not have been entirely candid with you, Nathan," said Coskitrask. "I do not mean to say that she lied. Rather, I suspect she has...colored your perspective on the matter. Please, hear my...our side of the story," he said, acknowledging Melinanatha's parents.

"...Okay," said Nathan slowly.

Coskitrask cleared his throat.

"Yes, Melinanatha was promised to me after the unfortunate and tragic death of her sister," he began. "And yes, when she becomes my wife I will become dominator over this fiefdom and Melinanatha will just be my wife - no longer dominatrix." He paused, giving Nathan a hard look. "This does not mean she will be my slave, if that is what she told you or implied. She will have complete freedom to travel the domain and beyond - as befits a noble of her stature - and will receive a generous stipend, as stipulated in the pact. She may even, one day, be granted another domain, one which we may share." Coskitrask coughed. "In point of fact, when I suggested Melinanatha take the place of her fallen sister, her parents' response was that of ebullience and relief."

"It was," said Saskalisssundra, nodding. "An acceptable solution to a difficult problem."

"But-" Nathan began.

"Yes, Nathan?" inquired Coskitrask.

"It's still her domain," he pointed out. "You're still taking it from her. To satisfy some stu-..." he stopped himself just in time. "...It just doesn't seem fair," he finished.

"Fair?" snorted Saskalisssundra.

"Now now, Saskalisssundra," said Coskitrask. "Nathan has a point. It isn't quite fair to your daughter." He hesitated. "Or, rather, it wouldn't be fair had she managed her domain better," he said sadly, shaking his head.

Suddenly, it clicked. Nathan thought back to his first conversation with Melinanatha all the way to the time she'd crashed the party he'd been attending so he could explain how futures markets worked to her.

"Melinanatha is struggling financially so you want Coskitrask to take over managing her estate," breathed Nathan.

"Very good, Nathan," said Coskitrask, beaming. "Melinanatha is a fine and spirited Draco but she does not have a head for ruling. Or trade. Her parents and I are in agreement."

Nathan frowned. His mind, having finally kicked into full gear, immediately noted the inconsistency.

"I thought trading houses were supposed to handle that sort of thing," he said, briefly eyeing Saskalisssundra.

"That is a prevalent yet... regrettably disingenuous notion," said Coskitrask, wincing. "The truth is that dominators must manage all aspects of their domains, including trade. Dominators are the heads; trade houses are the hands. Melinanatha's mother, as you heard, holds traditionalist views on this; yet even she agrees that Melinanatha cannot carry on as she has."

Saskalisssundra's expression had remained carefully neutral as Coskitrask spoke.

"Furthermore, there is animus between Melinanatha and the Trading House of the Green Claw," continued Coskitrask, shaking his head.

"Yeah, she told me," said Nathan. "She thinks there are spies in the house working against her. She also mentioned that, historically, trading houses don't always support their rulers."

"A rather pessimistic view, though not entirely untrue," said Coskitrask, chuckling at the unexpected rhyme. "Ultimately, a successful dominator - or dominatrix - must be able to work with their trading house or houses, even through gritted teeth. Melinanatha won't even speak with them these days. I believe the source of this conflict is over their repeated refusal to loan her money for next to nothing. And their futile attempts to reign in her extravagant spending."

"How do you know all this?" said Nathan. "There actually are spies here, aren't there?"

"Nathan, Nathan, please," sighed Coskitrask, shaking his head. "You make it sound as though there is a conspiracy working to destroy her. Did it ever occur to you, listening to Melinanatha's many screeds condemning me, her trading house, possibly even her parents, that it is simply a matter of a mother, father and prospective husband keeping an eye on a beloved albeit stubborn family member? Of course we hear things and occasionally ask others to look into rumors regarding Melinanatha. It does not rise to planting informants in her household or trading house to undermine her."

"I...guess that makes sense."

"And before you grow suspicious of us for professing nothing but altruistic intentions - as a man of your intelligence would - Melinanatha has failed to pay her quarterly tribute to her sire and dam for the last, oh, three odd years."

"Three years, two seasons," supplied Saskalisssundra with clear irritation.

"Because she simply does not seem to understand the difference between how much she earns and how much she spends," said Coskitrask. "Daughter or not, she is still her parents' vassal and must pay tribute. Yet she cannot. In fact, for nearly the same length of time, her parents have been forced to...supplement her income to prevent her domain from falling into ruin."

"Nearly one-hundred lancs," sighed Girgnasharak. "Every year."

"We call it a 'gift,' for appearance's sake," sneered Saskalisssundra. "And the fool seems to take this as an invitation to spend much of it on more puzzle sticks or add it to her petty hoard rather than pay for guards, food, sundries or even entrust it to her trading house." She growled. "And I am loath to admit this to anyone, let alone an outsider, OUR domain cannot suffer this loss much longer. One day soon our munificence will run dry. Then my daughter will have to choose between losing Northcliff to Coskitrask or destitution."

"So she is a drain on the family rather than an asset, to put it in blunt and unflattering terms," said Coskitrask. "Were I to take control of this domain I am confident I could steer it to prosperity. My wealth speaks for itself. And I would happily pay the additional tribute that would be due to her parents as their vassal twice fold."

Nathan silently considered all of this.

"There you have it," said Coskitrask, throwing his arms open. "My sinister ploy to help Melinanatha, her domain, her sire and her dam, revealed. I will not deny I want to take this domain as my own, but is it really too much to ask? Is it not 'fair' to me?"

"I guess not..." said Nathan softly.

"And we know, contrary to your assertions of true love, that you are merely a pawn in my daughter's bid to retain control over her domain," said Saskalisssundra. "No doubt she offered you some...incentive to play your role," she said, eyes narrowing.

Girgnasharak growled. Nathan tried not to look at him.

"So we ask you, Nathan," said Saskalisssundra. "Renounce your engagement. Cut ties with my daughter. Do it for her sake, our sake and the sake of this domain. Do it because you are meddling in affairs that do not concern you. Do it and live without regret."

Nathan opened his mouth, shut it, opened it and shut it again, completely at a loss. He looked over at the dining room doors.

"Can I...talk to Melinanatha first?" he asked hoarsely.

"No," said Saskalisssundra firmly. "As Fel the Terrible once did, I am drawing a line in the sand. Better for you to leave now and cut a clean wound - Melinanatha's heart will mend quicker this way."

Nathan's own heart was breaking a little as she spoke. He sniffed and, to his surprise, felt tears welling in his eyes. He bit lip and looked away.

"Hold a moment," said Coskitrask, raising a scaly hand. "I do not think it is reasonable to ask Nathan to leave just like that."

"This was your idea, Coskitrask!"

"Indeed. But this is Nathan's decision. And he will not be inclined to make it unless we first rectify something."

"What?" said Saskalisssundra, taken aback. She silently mouthed Coskitrask's words. "Do you mean...his current shape? Not that it is any of our concern, but if his kind would not recognize him as he is now, surely he could just drink the counter-potion. If-"

"No," said Coskitrask, shaking his head. "I mean...the arrangement he's made with your daughter may make it difficult for him to return to his former life afterwards."

"Wait...what?" said Nathan, bemused, wiping his eyes.

"I know this has been difficult for you," said Coskitrask in a soothing tone. "Having to constantly traverse the veil between worlds, split between the Realms and Earth. And when your relationship with their daughter is severed, well...it will be even worse. But nothing is set in stone. I co-"

"This is only the second time I've ever visited the Realms," said Nathan. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"Ah," said Coskitrask, blinking.

"You know what?" said Nathan fiercely, his anguish suddenly turning to anger. "I don't think Melinanatha needs you. Do you know the other reason she asked me to marry her? So I could help her with her finances. I'm not just some 'journeyman merchant' - I'm a straight-A pre-law economics major who made the dean's list - twice - and already has offers from several law schools, including Harvard!"

The last bit was something of an exaggeration; encouraging words from law school recruiters did not an offer make. But Nathan wasn't about to clarify that. He didn't know why he was suddenly so incensed - perhaps it was Saskalisssundra constant belittlement, Coskitrask's friendly yet self-satisfied attitude, or perhaps it was the possibility he'd never see Melinanatha again.

"Control yourself, human," growled Saskalisssundra.

"What do you think Melinanatha and I have been doing and talking about over all these months, huh?" said Nathan. He glared at Coskitrask. "Let's say you took over this domain. What would you do to improve revenue and grow the economy?"

Coskitrask seemed caught off guard but responded quickly.

"I would...cut costs in Northcliff, for one," he said. "Then I would diversify-"

"Diversify the economy by establishing new businesses and industries," interrupted Nathan. "For starters, I'd build a sawmill so we can make and sell lumber rather than raw wood. It's more valuable, weighs less and can then be used in other industries down the line. There's a river near Snail's Rest that'd be perfect for it. And we can set it up for a song by splitting the costs for its construction with a couple of local merchants for a share of future profits. Getting the mill set up will create more jobs and lower local construction costs - good for the entire economy. I'd also set up a charcoal burning industry - there's plenty of wood out there and there's always a demand for fuels even if the demand for housing goes down. And there's some obvious economic synergy with the copper mine - it'd make it cheaper to smelt the ore if we produce our own high energy fuels. Even with copper prices as low as they are we can sit on the surplus until prices stabilize and then slowly disseminate it into the market so as not to cause another trough. We could also switch to making finished copper goods - always cheaper to do it locally. We could attract smiths here with tax breaks and other incentives, adding yet another industry. Once we got some real capital going I'd look into some long-term investments with other trading houses - caravans and the like. Or build some schools, libraries, marketplaces, temples and other public institutions to increase human...sorry, Dracocapital development. Oh, wait, we've already done some of this! The sawmill will start construction as soon as the machinery gets here from Do vin Vas and we've already built a couple of kilns and produced our first batch of charcoal."

All of this came out as a single controlled torrent of words. The other Draco and kobold servants were staring at him, speechless. Coskitrask was the first to recover.

"And where did the initial capital for all this come from?" he asked slowly.

"I...convinced Melinanatha to sell most of her puzzle-stick collection," said Nathan, chest still heaving from his tirade. "At least...those that weren't a part of her personal hoard."

Saskalisssundra actually gasped.

"Later she...came up with another hundred lancs; it's how we were finally able to buy the saw blade," said Nathan, slowing down as something occurred to him. He chuckled mirthlessly. "I guess I know where that money came from now - one of your 'gifts.' Well, now you can think of it as an investment. I'm not going to lie. Conservatively, it'll be a year, probably two, before she's out of the red, but it'll happen."

The entire dining hall still seemed stunned. Apart from Coskitrask, who was gazing owlishly at Nathan. Then, he broke into a smile.

"Well done, Nathan," said Coskitrask cheerfully.

"Huh?" said Nathan.

"What?" said Saskalisssundra.

"That's what I would have done," said Coskitrask, nodding. "Differing in some minor details, but overall, a sound plan. However, I am far more impressed that you convinced Melinanatha to sacrifice her collection for the good of her domain."

"As am I," said Girgnasharak, shaking his head in amazement. "Easier to slay a stagbear than make my daughter part with even one stick."

Coskitrask paused, clearly for dramatic effect.

"Yes, I think you will make a fine husband, Nathan, your race notwithstanding," he said to the collective shock of everyone in the room.

"...You cannot be serious," breathed Saskalisssundra.

"I am," replied Coskitrask simply.

"But...then you wouldn't get her domain," said Nathan, just as flabbergasted as everyone else.

"So be it," said Coskitrask, shrugging. "If young Nathan is willing to bear the onus of taming Melinanatha and her domain and if Melinanatha is happier with him, I will not oppose the union. In truth, I was not much looking forward to managing Northcliff, enduring my bride's resentful glare every day. My existing domain is wealthy enough and I learned long ago that riches come readily to those who are not greedy." He paused. "As far as Girgnasharak and Lady Saskalisssundra's obligation to provide me with a suitable mate, that matter shall remain in abeyance until after the wedding. At which point I am certain we will arrive at some reasonable compromise."

Coskitrask lifted his goblet into the air.

"A toast to the betrothed," he said magnanimously. "Lady Melinanatha and future Lord Nathan, dominators the peak of Valt, Northcliff, the hamlet of Snails' Rest."

Overawed or simply swept along by Coskitrask's words, Melinanatha parents raised their goblets, repeated his words and, almost mechanically, drank. Nathan just stood there in stunned silence.

"This is nuts," he muttered, too quietly for anyone else to hear. "Doesn't make any sense..."

It did not come as a sudden revelation. Rather, it was a suspicion that grew steadily stronger the longer he entertained it, even as a few holes appeared in his reasoning. Certain thoughts had been quietly winding their way through his mind ever since Coskitrask had expressed concern for his well-being - over what would happen to him if he were to simply break up with Melinanatha. These thoughts were coalescing into a theory - a very dark theory. It tugged for his attention, insisting that something was amiss. Then, Nathan realized there was a way he could check.

"Thank you, everyone," said Nathan solemnly. "Thank you, Lord Coskitrask, for your kind words and blessing."

Coskitrask nodded graciously.

"And...Lady Saskalisssundra and Lord Girgnasharak, thank you as well."

Nathan paused for a second. He had to choose his next words carefully.

"If I may," he said. "I would like to go up tell Melinanatha the good news right away."

"What, just like that?" said Saskalisssundra, bemused.

"I understand your enthusiasm," said Coskitrask. "And your eagerness to convey the good news to your bride-to-be. But it is unwise to interrupt a meeting with the Vassal Council."

"I won't," said Nathan, raising a clawed hand. "If she's still talking with the Council I'll wait outside the door. I want the first thing Melinanatha to see is me and the first thing she hears is that the wedding can go ahead."

"Hah! Quite the romantic," said Coskitrask, gently swirling his drink. "Still, be patient. She will return in due time."

"Indeed," said Girgnasharak. "Besides, I want to see the joyous look on her face as well."

Nathan silently cursed. He couldn't seem too eager; Coskitrask might suspect something. He considered his options. How else he could excuse himself from the dining room? Then, something occurred to him. He stifled a chuckle. He thought back to Zeszintha's many lessons. Oddly enough, they hadn't covered this particular contingency.

He cleared his throat and endeavored to look uncomfortable.

"Er, to tell the truth, that's not the only reason I'd like to step outside for a bit," he said.

"Yes?"

Nathan nodded his head towards the exit. He smiled wanly.

"I, um, need to use the, uh, what would you call it here...the privy?"

There was an embarrassed silence.

"Oh," said Coskitrask.

"Yeah," said Nathan.

"I see," said Saskalisssundra. "Very well, er..."

"I know where it is," said Nathan, rising.

* * *

"They knew the entire time?" exclaimed Zeszintha.

"Yes - again, from the very beginning," said Nathan grimly as the two of them marched down the narrow hall. Zeszintha had to half-jog to keep up with Nathan's long strides. Glowing blue orbs floated a few feet above them every ten yards or so, illuminating the corridor.

"And...they did not inform the Lady?"

"Nope."

Zeszintha shook his head. "For Lady Saskalisssundra and Lord Girgnasharak to deceive us..."

"To be fair, we tried to deceive them first," said Nathan. "But something else is going on. I got the feeling Coskitrask was the one who pushed her parents to visit us in the first place. He's up to something."

"The gentleman...sssupectsss sssome plot against the Lady?"

"Yeah," said Nathan. "Listen, can you go round up...what was his name...Kelscrim? Yeah, Kelscrim."

"Him? I...sssuppose."

"Bring him up here. You might want to get a guard or two to escort him."

"Isss that necessary?"

"Definitely. Don't let anyone know what's going on, if you can."

The two stopped at a door near the end of the hall.

"I will be discreet," said Zeszintha.

Zeszintha bowed, turned and hurried back down the hall. Nathan stood by the door and waited. He didn't have to wait long.

"N-Nathan!" gasped Melinanatha as she emerged from the chamber.

"Sorry, didn't mean to spook you," said Nathan, grinning.

"What are you doing up here?" she gulped. "Did my parents expel you from the dining hall?"

"What? No, not at all," said Nathan. "Listen, a while back you mentioned that Kelscrim was the one who told you about Mythic Matches, right?"

"What? Why, yes he did," said Melinanatha, bewildered.

"Good. You need to tell me exactly what he said. Word for word, if you can remember."

"Why?"

"It's important," said Nathan earnestly. "You got to trust me." He paused, and then took out his cell phone. "Er, but before we get into that...why did the Council call you?" he said as he swiped the screen.

Melinanatha's lips tightened.

"The Council member merely wished to confirm our engagement," she said nervously. "Whenever a noble Draco weds, the union must be approved by the Council. It is a technicality as no match - even those between a noble Draco and a non-Draco commoner - has been rejected by the Council for centuries." She gave Nathan an odd look. "In point of fact, the Councilor seemed quite enthusiastic about our nuptials when he learned you are from Earth."

"You told him where I was from? That I'm human?"

"Of course! I wouldn't dare attempt to deceive the Vassal Council."

Nathan made a mental note to investigate this later.

"Your mom, dad and Coskitrask knew I wasn't a Draco," he said absently, tapping on his phone.

"What?"

"Yeah, they know all about Mythic Matches," said Nathan, shaking his head. "They were just jerking us around."

Melinanatha's nostrils flared. Her mouth curled into a scowl and her hands curled into fists.

"Of all the...my mother is behind this, isn't she?" she hissed.

"Sort of," said Nathan. He looked up. "Actually, not really. Listen, could you hold off on that impending tirade and tell me what Kelscrim told you about Mythic Matches? If I'm right about this, you'll want to save that energy for Coskitrask."

* * *

The dining room doors swung open. Melinanatha strode inside. Her parents and Coskitrask looked up at her from empty plates and goblets.

"By all the gods above and below," snarled Saskalisssundra, rising from her seat. "What took you so long? You said you'd send word if your meeting with the Council ran long. I was about to send a servant after you. And where is...what is that?"

Nathan stepped around Melinanatha. He now stood a good two feet shorter than Melinanatha - and most of the other Draco in the room - because he had returned to his human form. He wore the same ensemble of medieval clothes - doublet over a white shirt, large belt, hose - but they were human-sized.

"Is...that Nathan?" said Saskalisssundra, face wrinkling with clear dislike.

"Yes, mother," said Melinanatha dourly. "This is his true form." She pouted. "It wasn't my idea."

"Small, soft, and pink," said Girgnasharak disapprovingly, looking him up and down. "Hmph. Not quite as scrawny as an elf, but damned close. What a disappointment."

Nathan shot him an annoyed look before speaking.

"I changed back because, well, I think it's about time we were all honest here," said Nathan, folding his arms.

Melinanatha snapped her fingers. A pair of her guards emerged from the hall dragging a much smaller robed figure. They hurled their captive to the floor before the table. It was Kelscrim. The kobold servant looked up at those seated and then hung his head in shame. Coskitrask, Nathan noticed, avoided looking directly the kobold.

"Explain this, now!" barked Saskalisssundra, pointing at Kelscrim.

"Nathan will explain everything, mother," said Melinanatha firmly.

Nathan unfolded his arms and nodded. A shiver of anticipation and anxiety ran through him. He took a deep breath, recalled some of the techniques he had learned at his Toastmasters group, and spoke.

"Lord Girgnasharak, Lady Saskalisssundra," he began. "It may interest you to learn that your vassal Coskitrask conspired to have your daughter exiled from the Eastern Kingdom."

He paused, ignoring that astonished and furious looks from Melinanatha's parents to glance briefly at Coskitrask. The latter hadn't reacted at all, which was actually a dead giveaway. Nathan continued.

"Melinanatha first learned about Mythic Matches from her servant Kelscrim," he gestured at the cowering figure. "Kelscrim provided Melinanatha with the, uh, incantation that let her create a Mythic Matches account - let her contact humans on Earth," he clarified. "The funny thing is the incantation he gave her was very long. In fact, it filled an entire page."

"So?" snorted Melinanatha's mother, finally sitting back down. "Spells require complex formulae to invoke, particularly when one is not a skilled mage. It is quite common to refer to a scroll or book."

"It isn't exactly a spell," said Nathan. "At least, that's what the Mythic Matches customer service rep told me. In any event, the standard incantation to...invoke Mythic Matches is only a couple sentences long."

"She'i i'a malte'z," said Melinanatha. "Ae'e ie'yu m'te'z i'a-maree Mythic Matches t'wil ae'y app az e az. M'ae ee az, venez'e al'a in tolez ae'e so'e maerez."

"The Elder tongue," gasped Saskalisssundra. The look of irritation on her face faded.

"Surprised my Elder is still so fluid, mother?" said Melinanatha smugly.

"That's what you say into a mirror to make Mythic Matches work in the Realms of Shaltae," explained Nathan. "That's it. Kelscrim's longer incantation worked, but it downloaded an alpha version of the app."

Nathan stared at their blank faces.

"An alpha is a...an unfinished version of the software - of Mythic Matches," explained Nathan carefully. "I'm not even going to pretend to understand how computer software can be integrated into a dimension-spanning spell, but it was. In any case, when a programmer - I guess what you would call a special type of wizard in my world - develops software, they first build an alpha and then a beta version." He paused. "Think of the alpha as a working but incomplete version of a spell while the beta is a complete but likely flawed version of a spell. The flaws - we call them bugs - are removed from the beta through careful extensive testing. I know a little bit about programming but it's not my area of expertise."

Nathan waited for a few seconds for the Draco to digest all this.

"So...Kelscrim gave my daughter a tainted version of the spell," said Saskalisssundra. Suddenly, she glared down at the kobold servant. "Did he knowingly provide her with this flawed spell?" he asked angrily.

"Yes," said Nathan. "And before you ask, no, it didn't put her in any danger. At least not in any immediate, direct danger," he added. "Remember how I said a software alpha is incomplete?"

Saskalisssundra nodded slowly.

"Well, sometimes an alpha includes features that will be removed in the final version - features that the programmer can't get to work properly, are later deemed unnecessary, and so and so forth. The version Melinanatha used - the alpha - had an option that isn't in the current buil-...the current and complete version of the spell. In fact, no-one outside of Mythic Matches is supposed to be able to access it." Nathan took a deep breath. "This feature allows people living the Realms of Shaltae to summon humans from Earth and, uhh...I guess magically bind us to them."

"Bind you?" said Girgnasharak.

"It isn't as bad as it sounds," said Nathan. He started pacing. "Not like in the sense of enslaving us or anything like that. I think the service rep said it would bind our souls together or something. It was originally intended for existing couples from both worlds who want to, well, fully consummate their union. It was all kind of murky. Like I said, this option was removed from the alpha and isn't available in the current version of Mythic Matches." He stopped pacing. "The key thing here is that once a human is bound to a being in the Realms like this, the human becomes a denizen of the Realms of Shaltae. By binding themselves to someone of the Realms they become a part of the Realms too."

There was a pause.

"And?" said Girgnasharak impatiently.

"Husband," said Saskalisssundra softly.

"What?" said Girgnasharak irritably, turning to her. "What?" Then, he noticed the grave look on his wife's face.

"The Council's decree," said Saskalisssundra. "Regarding Melinanatha and Coskitrask. Remember?"

There was a pause. Then, Girgnasharak's eyes widened.

"Exactly," said Nathan. "If Melinanatha had invoked this option - and she very nearly did - I would have become a permanent resident of the Realms of Shaltae. And if she had then married me - and to be frank, she was planning on doing that as soon as possible - she would have broken the Vassal Council's decree stating she couldn't marry anyone of the Realms of Shaltae apart from Coskitrask. The Council would have stripped her of her lands, title, possessions - everything - and exiled her from the kingdom. And, as I'm sure you know, you would have suffered the same fate if you tried to help her. She'd be homeless, penniless, and no longer have a family to go back to."

Saskalisssundra and Girgnasharak stared at Nathan in horror.

"And guess what," continued Nathan. "Kelscrim here specifically pointed out this option when he gave Melinanatha instructions on how to use Mythic Matches. In fact, he strongly encouraged her to use it, saying it was a way to guarantee a good match. And because it was still an alpha, it didn't include any warnings - the app didn't explain the consequences of invoking the option beyond stating she had eight hours to decide whether to marry me once she did. And Kelscrim certainly didn't bother to clarify this for her."

A low growl filled the dining room. Girgnasharak rose from his seat and unsheathed his sword. It was a heavy, wicked-looking blade with plenty of notches along its edges. Girgnasharak walked towards Kelscrim, teeth bared.

"Hold, father," said Melinanatha, raising her hand.

"I will gut this simpering wretch and toss his entrails over the parapet while he watches!" he snarled.

Kelscrim curled up into a shivering ball.

"Kelscrim will be punished in due course," said Melinanatha. "But save your ire for the true architect of his malfeasance - Coskitrask."

Girgnasharak froze.

"What?" he boomed. Coskitrask did not react beyond leaning back in his chair sighing - almost as though bored.

"Think about it," said Nathan. "How would a mere footman - er, no offense guys" added Nathan, looking around at the other kobold servants "Get a hold of that information - a special incantation that no-one outside of Mythic Matches is even supposed to know about? And even if he did, why would he use it to mess with Melinanatha? What's in it for him? The answer is simple: Kelscrim is an agent working for Coskitrask!"

Melinanatha's parents stared at him in shock. Coskitrask rolled his eyes. He did not seem perturbed in the least.

"The traitor confessed after we confronted him," spat Melinanatha, kicking the recumbent Kelscrim. "We even found coded scrolls concealed in his quarters. If need be, we can drag him to the practitioner-alchemist in Snail's Rest and have the truth magically extracted from his worthless hide. But I believe his confession was genuine. It is the only reason I may now spare his life."

"Don't you see?" said Nathan, almost pleading. "Coskitrask wants this domain and he's willing to do anything to get it. He planned the whole thing - probably right after the Council made their decree. Either Melinanatha would be forced to marry him or she'd be tricked into marrying someone she was forbidden to. Either way he'd wind up owning this place. Personally, I think he was hoping Melinanatha would violate the decree. It explains why he wasn't upset with our engagement. Hell, he supported it. That way he'd be rid of Melinanatha completely and wouldn't have to pay her a stipend."

"Even more than that," said Melinanatha, eyes blazing with anger. "If I violated the decree, the domain would pass to entirely Coskitrask per the wording of the decree. He would no longer be obliged to pay you tribute." She coughed. "Er, the tribute that I am supposed to, mother, father," she added apologetically.

"I started figuring it out when Coskitrask started going on and on about how difficult it must have been for me over these last months," said Nathan. "He thought Melinanatha had already invoked the clause and bound me to the Realms. See, denizens of the Realms can only visit Earth for a couple of days per week. He'd only know this if he had an extensive understanding of the app. Thank God I checked with Mythic Matches that night. They figured out what was going on and Melinanatha let me off the hook. If she hadn't..." Nathan shook his head. "Then when he openly supported our marriage, well, I knew something was up." He looked directly Coskitrask. "You overplayed your hand."

Coskitrask eyes narrowed.

Girgnasharak stared at Nathan, then at Melinanatha, and then at Coskitrask. Without saying a word, the muscular Draco turned and started walking towards Coskitrask, sword still in hand.

Saskalisssundra held out an arm blocking his path.

"Do not test me, Saskalisssundra," he growled.

"Do not test me, husband," said Saskalisssundra so coldly Nathan swore he saw frost forming in her eyes.

She turned and addressed Coskitrask, arm still upheld.

"These are very serious acccusations, Coskitrask," she said. If her demeanor was cold before, it was now downright arctic. "And they will be investigated. How do you respond to these charges?"

Coskitrask shrugged.

"I can only say that I am innocent," he said with infuriating calm. "I do not know this servant," he nodded at Kelscrim. "He is not in my employ. Please, investigate this; I welcome it. But I warn you: no laws have been broken."

"No laws hav-...how dare you, you-" sputtered Saskalisssundra.

"Let us say, hypothetically, someone instructed Kelscrim to provide Lady Melinanatha with the alpha," said Coskitrask smoothly. "Neither Kelscrim nor his patron violated any law of the Eastern Kingdom doing so. Even if the version of Mythic Matches Lady Melinanatha received was...atypical, responsibility lies with the end user. She should have perused the manual and, if there was anything she did not fully understand or if there were any functions not fully documented, consulted Mythic Matches before using the application. It is, after all, very powerful magic and only a fool wields such power recklessly. In her eagerness to find a mate and thereby circumvent the Council's decree she endangered herself. And I believe poor Kelscrim simply did not understand the app. His only crime was an unfounded confidence in his comprehension of a potent enchantment. That and his eagerness to please his dominatrix. He is, after all, a simple kobold footman."

Nathan swore under his breath. He had to give the slimy bastard credit.

"Sophistry," growled Saskalisssundra. "You sought to rob our daughter of everything and steal an entire domain from our family. There are laws precluding noble Draco from such brazen attacks!"

"There are? Very well, name them."

Saskalisssundra opened her mouth but no words were forthcoming. A few seconds passed. Then, she shut her mouth, shooting Coskitrask a murderous look.

Coskitrask rose from his seat. He bowed.

"It seems through no fault of my own I am no longer welcome here," he said, shaking his head sadly. "I will retire to Snail's Rest with my two retainers and then return to the Pine-Marches come the morn. Unlike some, I find no shame in walking." He took a few steps towards the door and then paused. "However, we will at some future juncture need to discuss compensation for failing to fulfill your duty to provide me with a mate," he added, addressing Melinanatha's parents. "To start, I feel I should no longer be obligated to pay you fifty-and-one-hundred lancs every year."

This time it was Girgnasharak who restrained Saskalisssundra as the latter almost leapt across the table towards Coskitrask, screaming.

"DAMN YOU! I'LL KILL YOU! I'LL KILL YOU YOU FILTHY WORM! GET BACK HERE!"

"Such behavior does befit a Lady," said Coskitrask, grinning.

"Hold on," said Nathan. Girgnasharak managed to drag Saskalisssundra back into her seat. Saskalisssundra scowled but stopped yelling.

"Yes, Nathan?" said Coskitrask.

"You might want to let this go and just keep paying them."

"Oh? Why is that?"

"Let's assume, hypothetically, you were the one who provided Kelscrim with the incantation," began Nathan. "How would you have gotten a hold of confidential information from Mythic Matches, let alone understood it well enough to use it to manipulate Melinanatha? Even if there is magic involved I'm pretty such Mythic Matches is based on Earth and run by humans. And I'm a human and even I don't know it that well."

"An...interesting thought," said Coskitrask slowly, raising an eyebrow.

"When I first called the Mythic Matches help line the customer service rep mentioned the option Melinanatha almost used on me was originally suggested by a 'local.'" Nathan took another step closer to Coskitrask. "I think Mythic Matches worked with people from the Realms when they were developing their app. It makes sense. A good company develops an app with their customers in mind - all of their customers."

"And...?" said Coskitrask softly.

"I think you were one of their alpha or beta-testers," said Nathan. "Maybe a consultant? Not sure what your role was. Doesn't matter. It explains why you know the app so well. Hell, it explains why you're so familiar with software terminology." He looked directly into Coskitrask eyes, trying to ignore how large the Draco was relative to him now. And how sharp his teeth were. "Tell me, does the term 'non-disclosure agreement' mean anything to you?" asked Nathan.

Coskitrask blinked.

Several seconds of silence followed. Then Coskitrask, turned stiffly and walked towards the exit. The kobold servants wordlessly opened the doors for him.

He paused as he passed the threshold, turning back to face Nathan and the other Draco.

"In honor of Lady Melinanatha and Nathan's impending nuptials I will not seek compensation," he said. There was a slight crack in his voice which had formerly been as smooth as clarified butter. Suddenly, Coskitrask's face contorted into a frightening grimace. "There is more at play here than you can possibly imagine, human," he hissed, glaring at Nathan. "Watch yourself."

"Shut up you...you asshat!" snarled Melinanatha, wings flaring. "And never darken my domain with your shadow again!"

Coskitrask vanished down the hall. His footsteps echoed throughout the keep for a time. Then, all was silent.

Girgnasharak was the first to move after Coskitrask left. The Draco patriarch walked around the table, silently maneuvering around the frozen kobold servants, and headed towards Nathan, who had been standing there, staring at the open doorway.

"Well DONE!" he boomed, embracing Nathan with his tree-trunk arms.

Nathan yelped in surprise and pain as Girgnasharak squeezed him. The old Draco smelled of sweat, oil, leather, rust and iron.

"I did not understand everything you said, but you were masterful!" declared Girgnasharak, grinning almost manically. "Welcome to the family!"

He let go of Nathan, who stumbled back. He felt like a bottle of toothpaste that had been caught in an industrial press.

"Indeed!" said Saskalisssundra, rising from her seat. She hurried over to Nathan and hugged him as well - not quite as tightly as Girgnasharak, but their difference height meant that, as she held him, his head was squished between her melon-sized breasts. His face turned just as red.

"Despite all misgivings you have proven worthy of my daughter's claw," she said happily. She released Nathan and took a step back, regarding him thoughtfully with calculating eyes. "However, you should seriously consider reassuming the form of a Draco - permanently. It will cause less gossip and is...well, somewhat more prepossessing." She looked up and down at him. "I must admit; the longer I look at you the more I understand why my daughter is so fond of you even like this."

"It will also help you survive your wedding night," chuckled Girgnasharak, prodding Nathan with his elbow.

"Yes, of course!" exclaimed Saskalisssundra, clapping her hands. "We will commission a perpetual metamorphosis madraspotion for you, Nathan. It will be a perfect wedding gift!"

"Wait, what?"

"Oh Nathan!" cried Melinanatha joyfully.

Before Nathan could do or say anything else she too embraced him. She whirled around, clutching him to her bosom like an oversized stuffed animal, laughing with uninhibited elation. Nathan, for his part, could do little but struggle to breathe.

"You know," said Girgnasharak. "We should really meet with Nathan's sire and dam before planning the wedding."

"Absolutely," said Saskalisssundra. "I would very much like to meet this alchemist...biomedical engineer."

Nathan's eyes widened.

"Oh crap," he muttered, his voice muffled by Melinanatha's breasts.