A Mythical Match Up - Trying New Things (Patreon)

Jody stared down at the flyer he had plucked from the message board outside the lecture hall. He then looked up at the house. It wasn't one of the run-down, flophouse-like residences surrounding campus favored by rowdy or frugal students. Indeed, it looked like a nice, two-story suburban house complete with a well-cut grassy lawn. However, the aforementioned lawn had two ping-pong tables set on it, one of which was littered with empty paper cups and beer cans. A crowd of students - male and female - stood around the table, laughing, talking and yes, drinking. Loud, bass-heavy music and bright multi-colored lights emanated from the house windows. The surrounding neighborhood wasn't quite as raucous but neither was it totally serene. A few townies were sitting on their porches, chatting, enjoying the evening air. 

Jody swallowed. He took a few steps towards and stopped. One of the party goers seemed to notice him. They gave him a little wave. Jody whirled around and walked away, red-faced. He marched stiffly along the sidewalk heading straight for his bike. Behind him, the partygoer shrugged and took a swig from their cup.

"I can't do this..." whispered Jody.

Hands trembling he unlocked and removed the bike-lock. He hung the U-shaped lock over his bike's handlebars and adjusted the seat. Then with an awkward motion he swung his skinny leg over the bike and started pedaling, still clutching the flyer in his hand. He didn't stop until he reached the dorms.

"What was I thinking?" muttered Jody as he reapplied the bike lock, chaining both the wheel and the frame to a sturdy concrete block. He tucked his recently-ironed green dress shirt into his pants and trotted up the short flight of stairs. He ran his wallet along the RFID scanner and the door clicked open. He stepped inside, pausing only to crumple up the flyer and toss it in a nearby waste can. 

A few minutes later he was sitting on his bunk in his dormitory, alone; his roommate had gone on a weekend trip. He gazed sadly at the window and out at the not-so-distant lights of the city. He'd already had dinner so he didn't have any excuse to go to a restaurant. He didn't drink, so bars were out of the question. Would he really just spend another Saturday night cooped up in his room, watching re-runs of bad animated comedies or surfing the net?

Probably.

Jody sighed, grabbed his phone and started browsing the app store. 

"Maybe I can find a new game or something," he said.

He checked the top-ten app list and saw that a new game occupied third place. It looked like some kind of dating sim called 'Mythic Matches.' Its logo consisted of a human face and an elven face staring lovingly at one another. Curious, Jody tapped the icon. While not exactly a dating sim junkie he'd been playing them off and on again for years. They were, reflected Jody glumly, the closest thing to regular human contact he'd had since leaving for college. 

The game looked pretty bare bones. There were no preview screens, list of features or plot summary on the product page; the app blurb simply stated - in rather flowery language - that it could put the players in touch with mythological beings from some fantasy world called the Realms of Shaltae using 'soul resonance.' Despite this vague presentation people couldn't seem to stop gushing about it. It had a near-perfect rating and the user reviews heaped praise upon it. Some, somewhat bizarrely, thanked Mythic Matches for helping them find their true love. The very few negative reviews were strange, usually consisting of a single sentence warning prospective players not to buy the game (without giving a reason) or near non sequiturs like 'never date a succubus' or 'they need to come clean on what it really does.'

"What the heck," said Jody, shrugging. It was cheap. He tapped 'purchase app,' scrolled down to the bottom of the lengthy user agreement form and tapped 'accept.' The game started downloading. Jody crawled off his bunk bed and walked over to his chair. He watched as the percentage bar slowly and erratically edged its way to 100%, whereupon the game icon appeared on his crowded home screen. 

When Jody started the game the screen went black. The phone grew suddenly warm in his hand. 

"Huh, using a lot of processing power," murmured Jody.

A larger, higher definition version of the game logo faded in and out on the screen. Then a welcome window appeared: 

'Welcome to the Realms of Shaltae! Our exquisitely woven thaumaturgic formulae have already pierced the veil separating our realities and found harmonic souls. You may find a new friend, confidant, sweetheart or even your true love. To commune with the denizens of our world, simply touch their portrait. New matches may reveal themselves in time as others in the Realms open their hearts to us. Be polite, honest, but bold! Our clients seek companions who intrigue, impress, and excite.'

Jody tapped the screen and a second window appeared. 

'This is not a game! Take this seriously and consider the consequences of your words and actions!"

"Huh, this should be interesting," said Jody, straightening in his seat. "Must be going for some kind of meta thing like Doki Doki Literature Club."

He tapped the second window and ten different portraits appeared arrayed like overlapping pages. Each depicted a different anthropomorphic mythological being - all female, all remarkably beautiful, alluring, sexy or all of the above. 

"Ah, monster girls," said Jody dryly. He didn't disapprove but the trope was starting to get a bit overused in his opinion.

He swiped through the portraits. When he tapped one and saw the full, high definition version of the portrait he could not help but whistle in appreciation of the quality. Whether hand drawn, CG or some combination thereof the illustrations were so good he could have sworn they were photographs - well-taken photographs at that. The portrait in question was of a gorgeous, busty elf with pale-pink skin and long yellow hair wearing a long gold-and-green dress. She was smiling demurely.

Jody checked out a few other profiles. One depicted a silver-scaled anthropomorphic dragoness - lithe, elegant, with kind eyes, draped in a diaphanous silky robe. Another depicted a woman whose body seemed to be made entirely out of living flames - her skin a smoldering orange, her hair flickering yellow flames, her lips glowing ruby embers. Despite this she had a gentle, almost motherly disposition. When Jody opened the next profile he actually stopped to read the bio. 

"Hello, gentle reader. My name is Liwthi. I swim the currents of what surfacers call the Ribbon Sea. I am a second sister - what you may call a princess - of the Shoal That Spirals Through The Sparkling Waves. Though I adore my home I am forever fascinated by worlds and peoples beyond the waters. A friendly sailor spun stories of a wondrous device that allowed her to commune with beings beyond the skyveil. When I begged her for such a device she revealed a ritual through which I could obtain one. I have completed the ritual and now seek to share stories of my home and hear stories of yours, whoever or whatever you may be."

Jody had always had a thing for mermaids, merfolk, sirens, selkies and the like; Ariel from The Little Mermaid had been his first childhood crush (and, sad as it was, he actually preferred the original Hans Christian Andersen version of the story). And although admittedly a guilty pleasure, he really liked the character Meroune Lorelei from Everyday Life With Monster Girls. Liwthi was indeed some kind of mermaid. Her portrait depicted her sprawled on a rocky outcropping, gazing beatifically up at the viewer, a wide, sparkling ocean stretching on to the horizon behind her. While her lower body wasn't actually that of a fish her smooth sapphire legs and feet were lined with blue-green fins. Her dark-blue pigmentation lightened to a brilliant cyan along her stomach, chest and head. Iridescent motes across her lissome body hinted that her skin was actually composed of many fine scales. Her magenta hair hung from her scalp like a cowl, partially obscuring her gorgeous face and coy smile. Apart from a tiny seaweed loincloth hanging from her hips she was completely naked; the artist had tastefully censored her respectable bosom with locks of her hair. 

Enamored, Jody tapped the contact button and was met with an empty text field.

"So I just...type a greeting? Must be some kind of chatbot," he said to himself. 

He drafted a message and pressed 'send.'

'My name is Jody. I really love your portrait - it's beautiful! If you don't ask my asking, have you ever visited the surface? I mean, can you leave the ocean, at least for a while?'

He waited. A minute or so passed. Just as he was about to go back to one of the other profiles his phone buzzed and emitted a soft chiming sound. A message appeared beneath his.

'Oh my! No more than two days and already a voice reaches out beyond the skyveil. Greetings, Jody! Where do you hail from?'

Jody tapped a response.

"I'm from Fresno. It's a city in California. On Earth - the name of my world," he added the last bit after a moment's thought.

'What is Fresno like? Is it by a sea?

'No, not really. The closest ocean is almost a hundred miles away. There are some small lakes but that's it.'

'What is it like, this Fresno? Is it a forested town? Does it sit on the edge of a great dry desert or is it hidden within a great tropical jungle like Khez-Ar in the Shalspur?'

"Geez, this chatbot is next level," said Jody, shaking his head in amazement.

'It's...mostly just flat. There are some mountains nearby but that's it. It's okay, I guess.'

'But...surely there is more to it than that. Is it famous for its craftsmen? How many dwell there?'

Somewhat to his embarrassment, Jody had to Google Fresno's population for replying.

'Around 530,000. Half a million.'

Almost a minute passed before Liwthi replied.

'Truly? I cannot fathom so many living in one place! This Fresno must be the capital of your world! So many people - it must be wonderful!'

Jody felt an odd mixture of amusement, unease and depression as he read the message.

'It's a decent-sized city, but there are bigger out there - much bigger.' He hesitated, and then remembered it was just a game. 'I actually don't like it here. I'm only here because this is the only college I got accepted into. It's not a bad college but I wish it was in a small town, not a city.'

'But why? Surely it must be exhilarating to live among so many! My shoal numbers only a few hundred and even Great Sunken Lhilas boasts only ten thousand. Even the surface city of Do va Iosk is home to a hundred thousand, if what the sailors say is true.'

Jody blushed as he composed his response. It was just some advanced AI but he still felt uncomfortable discussing his problem. He wasn't even sure why he was being so candid with what was basically a machine. 

'I have something called social anxiety. I guess you can say I'm really, really shy. Whenever I'm around people I don't know, especially if there are a lot of them, I get nervous and self-conscious. I barely survived freshman year and even now it takes a great deal of effort for me to do something like go out to eat. I tried to go to a party tonight but I walked off as soon as I got there. Some guy even waved me over but I just...couldn't do it. I hope he didn't think I was snubbing him.' 

'That...that is terrible! Did some foul hag place a curse on you?'

'No, it's just something I was born with. I've seen psychiatrists and they think there may be a genetic factor. Nothing that can't be worked on, but it's tough.'

'I have never heard of such an affliction - to desire company yet be tormented by it. It would be as good as exile among my people - a death sentence. Please, accept my sympathy.'

'Uh, thanks,' said Jody, weirdly touched. 

'Oh! How rude of me! I never answered your question! Alas, without magical aid my kind cannot survive out of water for longer than a day at most. My sisters and I visit ports at times but I have never traveled too far inland. Perhaps one day a kindly magus will grant me the ability to survive on the surface, if only for at time. Or perhaps one day I will save enough to pay a magus for their kindness. But until that day I learn of the wider world from sailors and dockworkers.'

'Do people from the surface ever visit you?'

'Oh my yes! We can grant surfacers the ability to breathe water for a day. It is supposed to be a sacred gift bestowed upon those proven worthy or those who have performed a great service for my shoal, but in recent times some sisters grant it to anyone who pays them. Typically it is some wealthy surface dweller or adventurer who wishes to explore the depths. However, I darkly suspect some of my sisters provide the gift to smugglers, slavers and other ne'er-do-wells.'

'That's awful!' 

'Indeed, but many of them, like me, long to explore the surface; such enchantments are costly. Or perhaps they do it for the thrill of associating with such rogues. I will never understand this obsession.'

"Even in other dimensions, girls like bad boys," grumbled Jody (not actually typing it). Then, he gazed thoughtfully out his tiny, dust-speckled window into the night.

'Funny thing is, I could go out and explore the town any time I wanted. I could even go on a trip next Spring Break - I spent the better half of an afternoon checking ticket prices. But I never would - the thought of all those people...I can't do it. I'm stuck, but it's all in my head. You want to go see the world but you can't survive out of the water for longer than a day. It kind of puts things in perspective.'

'Do not feel less a man, Jody! Demons of the mind are the hardest to conquer. You will find the courage to go out and explore the world one day; you seem the kindly sort and such folk always have reserves of bravery in their hearts.'

Jody stared at the text on the screen. His face turned red and his eyes actually moistened a little. He sniffled and wiped his nose. Seconds ticked by as he just sat there. Outside, somewhere in the distance, a car alarm sang and then went silent.

"That's...probably the nicest thing anyone has ever said - texted, typed, whatever - to me," he said at last. Then, his lips tightened as a surge of bitter resentment welled within him. "And it wasn't even a real person who said it," he said, feeling terrible. 

He tapped the screen. His finger hovered over the 'X' in the upper right hand corner of the app. Then, Liwthi sent another message.

'I cannot visit your world - at least for now. But...would you like to see mine?'

"Huh?" said Jody, lifting his finger.

'It will not be for long. The price is high even for a short tryst but you deserve a kindness and I wish to learn more about your world - not through this odd device, but face to face.'

Suddenly, a textbox appeared over the chat window. It read 'Liwthi wants to meet you! Do you accept?' Below it were two buttons, 'Yes' and 'No.'

Jody's anger slowly dissipated, replaced by curiosity. He pressed the 'Yes' button. 

A few seconds passed. Nothing seemed to happen. Jody pressed the 'Yes' button a few times and then 'No' once. The screen seemed frozen. 

"Crashed, dammit," he cursed. "That chat-bot was amazing. I wonder what..."

Jody trailed off. He blinked, and then turned his head slightly. He could just make out a soft, muted hiss coming from the shared bathroom. Someone was using the shower. But the only way to enter the bathroom was through either his dorm or the adjoining one. And the adjoining one was unoccupied, its door locked. And his roommate was out of town. 

Jody swallowed. He slowly rose from his chair.

"Some...pipes must have broken, yeah," he murmured to himself. "This place was built during the Reagan administration, so no surprise there."

He reached out and nudged the door open. The hiss grew louder and to Jody's alarm he made out the sound of someone splashing about in the tiny stall. 

"Crap, crap," he whimpered. He glanced back at the hallway door and down at his phone, contemplating whether to call campus policy or just make a run for it. 

"Jody?"

The voice was sweet, melodic and silvery - like the dulcet notes of a violin played on a moonlit night.  Jody froze.

"This...device is wondrous! It is like being underwater and in the air at the same time! What is it called?"

"H-Hello?" managed Jody.

"There you are! Come! As much as I would like to stay the portal will not remain open for much longer!"

"It...can't be," whispered Jody. 

Shaking, cold sweat forming on his brow, Jody entered the bathroom. The shower curtain was drawn and, though the room was dim, Jody could see a sinuous silhouette through the translucent plastic. Then, a long, graceful arm emerged from the stall. It was sapphire in color dotted with iridescent aquamarine scales. It beckoned him. 

Mesmerized, Jody slowly approached the stall. His tennis shoes squeaked as he walked across the wet ceramic floor. Then, the curtain parted a foot or so, revealing a smiling face. 

"I'm here, Jody."

She was even more beautiful in person. Her features were delicate and smooth, like a living marble statue of a Greek goddess. Long purple-red hair hung from her head like a cowl, just like in her portrait. Her scent was sweet with a hint of sea-salt. 

Jody took another step forward. He leaned closer, gazing into her beautiful blue eyes. Then, her hand curled around the back of his head and drew him to her. She kissed him. 

"Wha-wha-..." gasped Jody. He stepped back as though the kiss had broken whatever spell he had been under. "You're...you're...why did you kiss me?" he stuttered, immediately feeling stupid for asking such a question. 

Liwthi tittered.

"So you can breathe underwater," she said. "Come, Jody, the waters of Shaltae await." She grinned. "As do my sisters."

Jody yelped as she pulled him into the shower. There was a brief flash of light. Then, silence, save for the trickle of water slowly running into the drain.