Group Watch: I Know I Love You E13-16 (Patreon)

E13-16. Well. I have to admit that I didn't enjoy this set of episodes as much as the ones that came before, but - and this is important - I do feel that Show is on track, in terms of developing and telling our story.

Mainly, I appreciate that our characters continue to feel like real people - imperfect, flawed and sometimes making decisions that aren't the greatest.

At this point in our story, our OTP's been minted, and the honeymoon phase of their relationship has been sweet to witness.

But, given the complicated contexts in which they both exist, it's not surprising that challenges would present themselves, quite soon.

The thing that's causing some alarm bells to go off in my head, is this thing with Zhao Jin's ex-wife, Muchu, who suddenly reappears, this set of episodes, and seems intent on wanting to establish a reconnection with him.

Although she's acting all pleasant and saying that of course she respects the fact that he's got a girlfriend now, it's obvious that she'd shown up, hoping - expecting, even - that Zhao Jin would take her right back, because he's just that kind of nice, accommodating, turn-the-other-cheek kind of person.

..Which, y'know, she's not entirely wrong about.

I think the key issue here, which Sister Hong brings up at that dinner, is that Zhao Jin's too nice for his own good.

It's that niceness that makes it hard for him to say "No" to people, when they ask him for help, whether that's asking to borrow money, or asking for him to help pick up their son from daycare - which is exactly what happens, this set of episodes.

To be clear, I'm not doubting Zhao Jin's intentions; he's quick to draw the line with Muchu, when they first chat over coffee.

When Muchu says that she doesn't have firm plans for herself and Shitou, and then remarks, "Aren't you here, though?," Zhao Jin is quick to say that there's nothing that he can do for them.

Unfortunately, Muchu clearly knows that Zhao Jin finds it hard to say no to someone in need of help, and that's why she keeps asking him for help, whether that's fixing the toiler in her home, or staying a bit, so that she and his dad don't feel uncomfortable being left alone, or picking up Shitou from preschool.

I get that Muchu feels like she's in a desperate situation, and Zhao Jin is the only anchor she can think of, to hold onto, but boy, she's coming across as quite the sly predator to me, so far. 😅

She pretends to be nice and understanding about Zhao Jin having a girlfriend, but she's definitely not given up on wanting to latch onto him.

How creepy is it, that she manages to find out where Xu Nuo works, and even goes there, to presumably scope out her competition?

I'm guessing that we'll eventually get to see her claws - but not before a great deal of injured, wounded innocence, laid on for everyone else's benefit. 😅

The problem here, I think, is Zhao Jin's decision to not be upfront with Xu Nuo, about Muchu.

This is not going to look good to Xu Nuo, when it comes out, right? 😬

On Xu Nuo's side of things, I feel that she's being more outspoken than Zhao Jin, in general, but.. she's kinda getting stuck anyway.

Yu'an just won't give up on the idea of being with Xu Nuo, even though she does tell him pointblank, that she doesn't love him anymore.

And, Xu Nuo's mom just can't accept that Xu Nuo wants to break up with Yu'an, and wants to be with Zhao Jin.

On that note, I do think that Mom is coming from a place of concern, even though, I must say, she's being incredibly overbearing and stubborn about it.

I'd thought that Mom would be jolted out of her blind disapproval, when Xu Nuo tells her that she knows that Dad's back, and she understands, and could Mom please understand her too?

But I guess Mom's too obsessed with the idea of preventing Xu Nuo from making a foolish decision for love - the way Mom had once done, and is now choosing to do, all over again.

Sigh. So far, Mom's just on the "Do what I say; don't do what I do" train, and even though I get that she is trying to save Xu Nuo from heartache, it's really gotten to be too much.

I'm hoping that Mom will soon reach the point where she realizes that her good intentions and advice can only go so far, and that Xu Nuo needs to make her own decisions, in the end, and then live with the consequences of those decisions.

I do appreciate that Show demonstrates that it's all not so straightforward, and that moment when Mom tells Xu Nuo that she can't bring herself to abandon Dad, just because he's not good, and Xu Nuo hugs her and tells her that she doesn't agree, but understands, is poignant and bittersweet. 🥲

As for Yu'an, I have to say, I'm actually gloating somewhat, at how he suddenly finds himself with nothing, pretty much, because Cong Shan's reached the end of her patience with him, and decides that the potential deal is off; she's no longer interested in making him her partner - in marriage, and therefore, also in business.

I kinda love Cong Shan, in a way, because she's so calmly controlled and unaffected by all of Yu'an's whining and excuses.

She just.. observes everything, processes it, decides on how much leeway to give Yu'an, and when he's used it up, she cuts him off, without ever getting her feathers ruffled.

I mean, yes, she does show some emotion in that whole process, because who wouldn't feel insulted by the way Yu'an's been behaving the way he has around her, but all in all, very controlled and badass, and I find that I like her for it. 🤩

Or, maybe I like her for it, because it renders Yu'an's excuses, tantrums and desperate pleas so impotent. 😁

As for Yu'an, this set of episodes, he says to his father, that if not for Dad and his expectations about whom Yu'an should marry, Yu'an would've married Xu Nuo long ago.

I am admittedly quite curious to know if this is actually true.

After all, Yu'an is the king of excuses, and he's shown that he's very quick to shift the blame onto others, so that he'll come out of a situation looking like an innocent, injured daisy.

If Dad really had left him to his own devices, would he really have married Xu Nuo, like he said?

Part of me thinks that he'd probably have come up with other excuses to not marry her, because if he'd felt that strongly about marrying her, he would've done something about it, pressure from Dad nothwithstanding.

But part of me also wonders if I'm being too harsh in judging him; that maybe, left to his own devices, he really would have married Xu Nuo.

That said, even if he'd married Xu Nuo, he wouldn't have made her happy; he would've continued to force her to tailor her life around him, and he wouldn't have actually cared if she was happy, so. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Anyhoo. Now that Yu'an's being kicked to the curb by Cong Shan, it really is kinda gratifying to see him trying to worm his way to a solution that he can live with, whether that's getting his old job back (an immediate fail, ha - which shows that folks aren't keen to work with him, eh?), or trying to bring business to the company, even if it's a potential investment in Xu Nuo's parents' humble laundromat.

As for our OTP relationship, I generally like how they relate - except when it comes to the thing with Muchu (so far, anyway).

For example, I really like how stable and solid their trust is, in each other.

Like when Zhao Jin realizes that Yu'an is most likely on his way to see Xu Nuo, he just.. steps back, and does his own thing, and waits for Xu Nuo to call him, instead of calling her, the way they'd agreed.

And then there's how he tells her, with so much amiable, gentle understanding, that she will very likely need some time, because her relationship with Yu'an had been over a long period of time, and thus, they will likely both sustain some wounds, as they end their relationship.

Gosh, I was sooo impressed by the way Zhao Jin is able to consider all of this so calmly, and be so understanding and supportive of Xu Nuo needing some time, to sort everything out, including her own feelings.

I also love that moment when Xu Nuo tells Zhao Jin that she loves him, and he gets so moved by it all, that he has to quickly excuse himself, because he doesn't want her to see him cry. 🥲

Aw. It really makes my heart go out to him, because how much must he have felt that no one could ever love him, because of his background.

With this as context, it makes me so, so glad to know that these two people have found each other, and have chosen each other, and have decided to love each other, regardless of the challenges ahead. 🥲

I also love how they're so happy to see each other; that scene when Zhao Jin goes to meet Xu Nuo, and she's so happy to see him that she runs into his embrace, makes me feel like these two are taking refuge and comfort in each other's arms. 🥰

It's also nice to see them opening up to each other, like the way Xu Nuo takes Zhao Jin to her family's laundromat, to show him the place where she grew up.

Also very importantly, I appreciate that Xu Nuo is thoughtful enough, to set expectations with Zhao Jin, that in the future, even if they were to quarrel, and she were to say things that are unpleasant to hear, that she absolutely does not look down on him.

That feels so healthy, doesn't it?

The thing that concerns me, is that moment when Xu Nuo, sounding like she's starting a healthy conversation, tells Zhao Jin that she may not be able to keep her promise of not hurting him, after all.

When Zhao Jin apparently guesses correctly that she was thinking of using this as an excuse to leave him in the future, it gives a low-grade sense of unease about things.

Like, when the challenges become more pronounced in future episodes, as I'm sure they will, will Xu Nuo really try to break up with Zhao Jin..? Ack. I can't look. 🙈

This set of episodes, I found myself feeling rather perplexed at the way Shi Ran is shown to respond to her relationship with Xu Yang; the way she decides that she needs to gain the upper hand in the relationship, is rather unpalatable, contrasted with the genuine and generous give and take of our OTP.

And then I realized that that is the purpose of Shi Ran's relationship being treated this way; so that we as an audience can have a contrast, to better appreciate our OTP relationship.

Plus, I think it's quite true that the average nice person in China would have that kind of more calculated mindset, when it comes to relationships - at least, that's the impression that I've gotten, from dramas.

So I don't think that Show is saying that Shi Ran isn't a nice person, but that even nice people can have a more strategic, calculated approach to relationships - and therefore, isn't our OTP extra nice and extra special, for not being that way with each other?

Also, it does look like Shi Ran's getting more than she bargained for, since she finds herself feeling jealous of other girls being in close proximity with Xu Yang, so perhaps Show will turn this whole thing around yet, and make it about Shi Ran learning what love is and is not.

For the record, I wasn't too hot on the escape room arc; that almost felt like filler to me, and that's the first time I've felt that way about an arc in this show.

I'm in-principle in support of Zhao Qin's loveline with Xiao Bai, but I have to admit that I'm not very taken with it, in execution.

I mean, I like the idea of these two people finding meaning and hope in a connection with each other, but there's just something that feels lacking for me, in the delivery of it, so far, like it's kinda flat.

I'm fine with the idea of them working on a little movie together, but.. I can't help but wonder if this is going to be a "first and last work of their lives" sort of a thing - I sure hope not. 🙈

As we close out these episodes, it looks to me like Yu'an's preparing to knock the living daylights outta Zhao Jin, with all that boxing training, and also, win Xu Nuo back, with Shi Ran's help.

I'm firmly in the camp hoping that he will fail at both things, and fail hard.

For the record, I'm still hoping that Zhao Jin will get a chance to jiu-jitsu him upside the head, dude needs a serious wake-up call. 😑

We will discuss E17-20 on Sat, 3 Feb 2024!