Superboy/Riverdale: Why Not Both? (Patreon)

Tears fell fat and warm down Veronica’s cheeks. Archie… moving away… never to be seen again… and never having chosen between her and Betty!

She’d already cried for hours and she cried for hours more, only stopping to make herself presentable for lunch and then put in her daily exercise. After all, she was a Lodge. There were certain expectations of her.

But then it was back to sobbing!

Thankfully, she was all cried out by the time dinner rolled around. She wouldn’t have to make another titanic effort at repairing her appearance, only to have it ruined again by streaky eyeliner.

There was a silver lining. After all her feuding with Betty… God, it felt like they’d been at it for decades… now there was nothing left to fight over. They were both equally bereft. Maybe now they could be friends without that great big hunk of ginger stuck between them. Maybe she could be more intimate with Betty than ever, sisters even.

Sharing their deepest secrets, their hopes, their dreams, their longings and joys and sadnesses. Couldn’t that be even better than Archie Andrews, who for all his studliness was only a boy after all? And Betty was a girl! A wonderful, feminine, understanding, mother-daughter-sister-goddess woman!

Why, only a misogynist would think it was better to have Archie than a queen like Betty, just because Archie was all… chest hair and… and… non-lactating nipples!

Her eyes shut, nearly lulled to sleep by her happy thoughts, Veronica managed a smile. And, honestly, Archie wasn’t that cute. Actually, Betty was cuter than him, too.

Really cute.

So cute it was understandable that Archie wanted her, even as much as he did Veronica.

Yes, in hindsight, Veronica could see how Archie was so conflicted. If she were Archie, and Betty were Betty, why, Veronica, she’d… well, Archie, would…

It was then that Betty burst into Veronica’s bedroom.

“Ronnie, Ronnie, you’ll never believe who moved into Archie’s old house! It’s just the cutest boy you’ve ever seen! An absolute dreamboat!”

Dreamboat? Veronica wondered if that was Betty’s usual poor-person standards talking or…

She flung herself away from her sodden pillow and sprang to the window. “Lemme see! Lemme see!”

***

“Riverdale,” Kon said to himself. “What the hell am I doing in Riverdale?”

It was someone’s fault. Not his. Maybe everyone else’s. That was a possibility.

Because everyone had told him he should get closer with Superman, them being the last of the Kryptonians and sharing so much of the same DNA… personally, Kon would’ve preferred to share DNA with Power Girl, preferably doggy style…

But fine, he and Superman were bonding. Superman was his mentor now. Kon supposed it was an improvement on ol’ Leech… and if he was going to be spending any significant time on the Titans with Starfire, then it was a damn good thing he wasn’t hanging out too much with Dubbilex and his psychic abilities… so bring on the mentoring.

And Superman, his mentor, thought Kon could do with some stability. No more man-cave in Hawaii. Hello Ma and Pa Kent.

Only goodbye Smallville. The Kents had sold their farm, too old to work it. By now, a bunch of CNN stuff had made Smallville a ghost town… Kon guessed all the supervillains gunning for Superman out of costume didn’t help… so the Kents had decided to retire to a nice, quiet town.

If anything, Riverdale was even more obscenely wholesome than Smallville. Kon sighed. Well, what had he expected for Jonathan and Martha’s forever home? Murder mysteries? Zombies? Motorcycle gangs? Possessed role-playing games? Incest? Meteors? Lesbians doing bondage?

Nope, none of the above. Riverdale was about as exciting as a rerun of the Gilmore Girls, which Kon guessed was its appeal. Ma and Pa wanted peace and quiet. With not even a little time travel.

Then again, maybe the girls here still had their buccal fat and didn’t look like the ventriloquist-dummy-turned-real-boy that Tiktok said girls should look like. Call Kon old-fashioned, but he liked a pretty face to be a whole face, not just the bits that hung onto the bone after you’d vacuumed the thing for 48 hours.

It was then that Kon met Veronica Lodge and Betty Cooper. He probably would’ve met them at the same time, only Betty fell into the hedge around the Kents’ lawn, so it took her a few moments to pull the twigs from her hair and catch up. Complete accident.

Kon was a pretty smooth operator, so by then he and Veronica had set a date for Saturday. Then Betty said she was free on Friday, and she could tutor him if Kon needed help catching up with his homework at his new school.

Oh yeah. Kon just might like it here.

***

Before he knew it, Kon was running the Riverdale High Gazette. With Veronica’s money, they were sponsoring a toy drive for Christmas, and her money was going to whoever could volunteer the biggest Christmas tree… Kon sort’ve forgot all the details.

Betty had sat in his lap, saying there was a spring poking through the cushion of her seat, and Veronica had bent over to draw a Christmas tree on the chalkboard so Kon could visualize the kind of tree she wanted… well, that seemed a little uncalled for now.

Then again, he couldn’t remember what the chalk drawing had looked like, just thinking that her panties must’ve been awful small, because he couldn’t see any trace of them between her supple buttocks… the chick had an ass right out of El Carnival…

Well, screw it. Keeping up with these sorts of things was for guys like Tim, and how well did he do? He couldn’t keep it together with Steph, he couldn’t put it on with Cass despite the obvious lay-up of him being Robin and her being Batgirl… Kon was going to have to point Supergirl his way before the poor bastard gave up on girls altogether.

No, Kon was all about results. If he brought back the biggest Christmas tree, Veronica would be going out with him all next month. If he didn’t, Reggie would, and Kon wasn’t about to let that jerkoff win. Although then he’d be free to date Betty… maybe that was why Veronica was going with him, helping him pick out the right Christmas tree to chop down.

Or maybe it was that he hadn’t paid attention to her drawing on the chalkboard. But those panties, sheesh, he could’ve sworn she wasn’t wearing any at all!

But c’mon, if anyone could afford panties, it’d be Veronica Lodge!

***

“This one looks big enough!” Veronica cried, looking up in awe at a fir that stretched up into the snowy flurry like a skyscraper.

“I’ll say it does,” Kon said, following behind her, and she felt a light prod on her buttocks.

Veronica blushed, but he’d only used the knob of his axe, more’s the pity. She was usually pretty sensitive about her… ass… no matter how much she exercised, the muscle just seemed to swell it out, and it never even got any firmer… not that it’d ever been flabby… but it was a kind of soft and fully rounded bubble that always seemed to fill up the back of her dolphin shorts, and a lot fuller than they were on Betty.

And once, Veronica could’ve sworn she’d heard Kon say she had a fat ass, but it’d been in a crowded room, so it might’ve been someone else. She hoped so. Kon certainly didn’t seem to mind how her ass looked that morning, with her skirt hiding just how… curved… she was… Veronica wondered if he’d liked the cute little panties she’d worn just for him… they were pure fashion, but they gave her such a wedgie…

Kon slammed his axe down on a tree stump, bringing an abrupt halt to Veronica’s musings. “Looks like someone got here before us.” He unzipped his jacket and wrestled out of it, heedless of the six inches of snow they’d gotten overnight… more occasionally managing to drift down through the sunlight-blunting tree cover. “If it was Reg, let’s hope that guy was too much of a boner-lord to handle a tree this big. I bet he got one just big enough for that overcompensating F-150 of his. Dude doesn’t have my tactile—I mean, my tactical… awareness… of how to get a tree back to town.”

Veronica saw him peel his double layer of shirts off next. She wondered why he always wore one with a Superman logo underneath the first shirt. He’d pushed Dilton Doiley into a locker that one time, so he couldn’t be that much of a nerd—“Oh, Kon, you’ll catch cold!”

Kon spat in his palms and rubbed them together. “Relax, I’ll keep plenty warm chopping this mother down!” He picked the axe back up and lined it up for a swing at the towering tree Veronica had fingered for him. “What the Rao do lumberjacks say at a time like this? Fore? Geronimo? Ronnie, you know?”

Veronica shrugged. That was something a boy would know. She knew about make-up.

Then again, Kon obviously wore some product in his hair and when he took his shirt off, his muscles looked like he’d put baby oil on them. It looked nice, but she hoped he wasn’t all… Kevin.

“Well, if you think of it, tell everyone I said it before I circumcised this thing. And my voice sounded really deep and manly too.”

“Oh, Konnie…” Veronica smiled to herself. “Konnie and Ronnie, it’s just so perfect.” And he did look nice with his shirt off. As good as she would with her clothes off… so long as she was facing whoever was looking at her.

She’d once heard Kon say that someone was ‘dragging a wagon’ and she wondered if that someone wasn’t her… she didn’t even know if he liked wagons…