I’m here if you ever want to talk (Patreon)

I really hate when people say that to me haha. It always feels so insincere, like it’s the thing you’re *supposed* to say. ‘Let me know if there’s anything I can do to help’ gives me the same vibe, it’s basically saying ‘I’m going to carry on doing what I normally do and it’s up to you to start this conversation. If you don’t actively seek me out, I’m not going to put in the effort to talk to you about your feelings. The responsibility is no longer on me for I have done my part in giving you this indicator’ and I know I’m reading too much into it but... I just hate it lol

For me, it is Critically important that people in my life provide a space for me to talk without me having to ask first. I hate bringing things up. I always feel like a burden and there was a time in my life not too long ago when all my best friends wouldn’t ask me how I was doing. I basically had to sit them down and be like PLEASE make room for me to talk without me having to bring it up and honestly since then they’ve been mostly very good

I think a lot of people are really accidentally shitty in this regard. I think people are like ‘I don’t want to bring it up in case it upsets them’ but if your friend is already upset then they’re definitely thinking about it anyway so PLEASE GIVE THEM ROOM

Phrases I love when people say to me:

‘Hey it seems like something’s on your mind, what’s up?’

‘Oh yeah last time we talked you mentioned X, how are you feeling about that now?’

‘Hey how u feelin today’

‘Hey bud, doing ok?’

It just seems so basic to me but I think it’s something that so many people forget is important.