Lewd Dungeon, Chapter 254 (Patreon)

Chapter 254 – Storm God

“Who dares call me to these foreign shores?”

With a roar, thunder and lightning crashed before me, and was made manifest. The first thing I noticed of the god was long black hair, running wild and untamed in the wind. He was dressed in traditional Japanese clothes, all in white, with a red sash about his waist to bind it. Tucked into his sash was a sword in its sheath. He wore no shoes or sandals upon his feet, and yet the sand did not touch him, and he left no mark when he walked.

I nodded respectfully to him, and said, “Wise Susanoo, I called you here, to speak with you. Many are the tales told about you in songs and legends throughout the years. They say that you are wild and free, doing what pleases you. That kind of attitude is one I respect, and so, out of that respect, I sought you out.”

This seemed to please Susanoo. After all, I was offering him respect, without getting too obsequious with it. More than that, I was playing to his ego, telling him that there were stories told about his deeds. So, I was not surprised when I saw his posture ease slightly, and more warmth entered his voice.

“And what would we have to parley about, little man?”

I smiled, and motioned to the gifts I had placed in the circle. “There will be time for that, Lord Susanoo, but first, might I offer you gifts, since you have come to this foreign land?” The promise of gifts brought a smile to his face, of course. After all, who doesn’t like gifts?

“Very well, let us see these gifts you brought.”

I smiled, and picked up the rice first. “To start, I offer you rice, grown from my own fields, tended to by my servants.”

As he took the rice, Susanoo looked it over, appraisingly. “This rice, it looks healthy, and well-grown. You have been seeing to your fields well, little man.”

“Thank you,” I nodded my head at the compliment, and picked up the sword I had made. It was a straight, single-edged blade, made to be held in one hand or two, with my symbol emblazoned upon the guard. “Next, I offer you this blade, made by my own hand. Though I know it cannot compare to the legendary blade you plucked from the tail of the Yamata-no-Orochi, I still offer this, in sign of friendship.”

Now, Susanoo was smiling. “You offer me a blade made by your own hand? That is well and good. Yes, I can see that it cannot compare to my Ame-no-Murakumo-no-Tsurugi, but that does not mean it is an ill gift. What enchantment does the blade carry?”

“It holds the enchantment of True Imperviousness. That blade will never dull. It will never break. It will never be deformed, marred, or in any other way changed, from this day to the end of time, anywhere that the System holds sway. Even if one hundred gods of the forge all swung their hammers as one, they could not alter the blade, and the fires of one thousand forges lit by ten thousand dragons would not even heat it.”

“Hoh! Bold words, little man! And you expect me to believe such a tale?”

“The sword is yours, freely given. There is no one here, beyond us two. So long as you do not cause trouble for my servants, who I have placed in a wide perimeter, to ensure that our conversation is not interrupted by mortals, then you may test the sword to destruction, using whatever means you may wish.”

I know it was a bit cocky of me, but I was quite proud of the enchantment on that blade, which was something I’d thought up. Yes, in pure power, the blade was lacking compared to swords of legend, being only a little more powerful than a sword enchanted with enhanced sharpness might be. But it was sharpened to a razor’s edge, and enchanted to make sure that the edge would never dull, and the sword would never break, no matter what abuse it was put to.

It was not a blade that would allow an untrained farmer to slay dragons and threaten gods, but, in the hands of a master? There was a lot that an indestructible blade could do. But, more importantly, it was a blade that would never fail. Blocking blows from a much heavier weapon without losing its edge was just one benefit. The true use of the blade was that it could be used, even when a mightier blade would chip and shatter under the abuse leveled at it. It would endure, despite everything.

“Yes, I can tell from your tone that this is true. As one who has suffered a sword to break against a mortal foe’s bones in combat before, I know the value of such a blade. This is a worthy gift!”

“Then, might I present my final offering?” I held up the large, 1800 ml bottle of sake, offering it to the god. “This sake is made by the traditional means. It is not the most expensive type on the market, but it is the one that has the highest approval ratings.”

“Oh-hoh! You saved the best gift for last, I see!”Susanoo eagerly took the rice wine from my hands, licking his lips in anticipation. “But, such kingly gifts on a first meeting makes me wonder what it is that you are wanting, as a result of this parley?”

I waved my hand, and conjured a campfire, with logs set around it as rude seats. With another wave of the hand, a bottle of whiskey appeared in my own hand. “Then perhaps we might sit and drink together, as we speak? After all, a good conversation is best when you have some alcohol to go with it!”

“HA! Ha, ha, ha! Oh, yes! Long have I been looking for someone who knew what a true conversation started with! Come, I shall try this drink you’ve given me. But what is that you have in your own hand?”

“Oh, this? This is a drink from a land to the north of here, known as Tennessee. I would not be so rude as to give a gift, and then ask you to share that same gift with me. However, if you offered to share some rice wine from the east with me, then I would also offer some of the whiskey of the western world with you. After all, good drink is better when it is shared, is it not?”

“Ha! Oh, I like the way you think, little man.” Susanoo laughed, as he sat down on one of the logs. “Let me taste this drink you offered me, then, and see whether it is worthy of sharing of not!”

It turned out that the drink was, indeed, worthy of sharing, and so I learned about sake, and Susanoo learned about Jack Daniels. The bottles ended all too soon, but that was only natural, considering that the amount of alcohol needed for a god to get drunk, even in their mortal avatar, would make legendary heavyweights like the rock stars of the 1980s take a step back and say you needed to slow down. However, I was both god and dungeon, and creating things was part of my nature. So, when the bottles ran dry, I simply made new ones.

Night had fallen by the time we had gotten good and properly drunk. I’d already reached out to my followers, and let them know what the plan was, so they were taking shifts as they watched for anyone who might think on intruding. Susanoo, for his part, had plenty of stories to tell, and, once he had some drink in his belly, he loved to tell them.

It was in the lull between stories that I got to the point of this whole meeting.

“Y’know, Susanoo, there’s a reason I asked ya here, other than just in hopes of finding someone who could take their liquor. By now, you should be all hooked up with GodNet, which is a place for all of us deities in the System to hang out, party, chat, whatever. But, I wanted to give you a warning.”

At some point, we’d slid off the logs, sitting next to each other and using the log behind us to keep us at least partly upright. Easier to pass the bottle when you were sitting next to someone, after all. One of Susanoo’s eyes was half shut as he turned to look at me, the glare of the fire affecting him.

“A warning? Me? I am the lord of storms, and the god of the sea! What warning would you give me, Kuronoth?”

I laughed, and said, “I wanted to warn you that you should temper your rampages in the material realm. In the godly realm, you can rampage all you like. In fact, there are several gods that will scrap with you for the sheer joy of the fight, and finding a worthy opponent. Zenos, the Garlean God of the Slaughter, comes to mind, but there are others, as well, who rampage through the godly realm just so that they can feel alive.”

I fixed my gaze on Susanoo’s, and tried to make my voice as serious as I could, while being as drunk as I was. “But in the material realm, there are mortal beings who are able to kill gods. Truly and wholly, consuming every bit of their divine essence. They are able to do this, because the System empowers them, and allows them to do this.”

Susanoo’s eyes went wide, though I could tell it was not from fear. “Mortals with the power to kill a god? Is such a thing truly possible without the blessing of another god, or using a divine weapon to empower them?”

“Yes,” I nodded. “Such a thing is, indeed, possible. They are known as Godslayers, a class available to those in the fourth tier of power. They feed off a god’s own power, allowing them to take a god they’re fighting’s strength, and match it with their own. Even if the distance between them was ten thousand miles in terms of strength, the System would grant them the ability to stand on equal terms with a god, and fight them.”

“Hoh! This new world is full of all kinds of incredible things! To think that I might be able to cross steel with a mortal who could match me, strength for strength! It makes the blood run hot just thinking of it!”

“Hah! Yes, I expected you would say something like that.” I took another swig of the whiskey bottle in my hand, before offering it to Susanoo. “But the Godslayers only come out when a god goes rampaging in the material realm. To them, it is no game. Most have lost loved ones to a god’s rampage, and have sworn to avenge them, and destroy any god who causes such troubles in the future. Like the Heroes of ancient stories, their only goal is to vanquish their foes.

“And do not think that going on a rampage will let you cross swords with a worthy foe. They care not about the contest, or about fairness. Many of them do not get into melee at all, but instead use ranged weapons or magic to strike the god down from afar, without the god ever knowing that they were there.”

“WHAT!” Susanoo raged. “How can this be? What warrior would strike from afar, and without announcing himself?”

“Those Godslayers are not warriors. They are hunters. Do you yell to announce your presence to the hare or pheasant when you are hunting for your meal? Of course not! Godslayers do not come out to duel, or to have a sporting match. They come out to slay their enemy, by whatever means necessary. All that matters to them is the death of a god, and the System makes it so that they are capable of the feat.”

Susanoo frowned, and took a long draught from the bottle to help him consider his words. “You are saying some troubling things, my friend.”

“It is what it is,” I shrugged. “But that is why I wanted to find you, and warn you, before your rampages in the mortal realm got out of hand. Restrict your rampages to the godly realm, and you will be able to act until your heart’s content, but the System will not allow us free reign over the mortal realm.”

I smiled as I took the offered bottle back from Susanoo. “In the end, the System lords over us all, even the gods.”