Lewd Dungeon, Chapter 195 (Patreon)

Chapter 195 – Reflection

I smiled as I watched the priestess give what amounted to an interview to the reality show star in the middle of the dungeon. This Flint Fernvalley was an interesting character. He clearly had a good head on his shoulders, and was taking time to make sure his group moved through the dungeon as safely as possible, while showing off the unique features of my halls.

The idea of a reality show where celebrity adventurers dived dungeons like a potentially deadly version of Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives, was intriguing. Most people, even if they had the resources, didn’t go traveling to exotic places, so that kind of show would definitely be popular. It might even help draw some tourists to my halls.

Of course, I saw even bigger potential benefits, if I could watch his show, and ones like it. Seeing a show on other dungeons would be a good way to come up with new ideas without having to pay for things through the System or the DEN. The problem, however, was that I didn’t have access to whatever network he broadcast his show on, which was something I was definitely going to need to fix in the future. Information was a weapon, just as much as a sword was, and I wanted as many weapons in my arsenal as possible.

Thinking about things like that, I was rooting for Flint and his team to make it through to the twelfth floor, so I could give them an interview. Oh, I would still win if they had to retreat, since spreading my Tome of Kuronoth around would help spread my worship, empowering me in the long run. But the interview was also something that I could count as a win, especially if I managed to get access to wider information networks.

If Flint’s team managed to reach me, then I would happily give the interview. But I also needed to trade for access to that network of his. Assimilating a computer, or whatever equivalent they used, while focusing on the connection should work, especially if it ran through the System, but that was something I would have to figure out when the time came. In the meantime, I could start working on what I could trade for the access, and whatever else I could get.

The most obvious trade would be to get him an ‘in’ with one of the other dungeons, especially another one of the former-human dungeons. Perhaps doing something to get a new dungeon onto the DEN? No, unless I had some leverage on them, then I wouldn’t get as much out of the deal.

So, maybe one of the ones already on the global DEN? I could actually get in contact with one of them, and work a deal. So, I could profit both ways if I did that. I was liking this idea more and more.

The only question was which of the seven others on the Exchange would I send them to? Iahab and Freedomland were out, obviously. Their xenophobic natures, even amongst humans, would make them a poor showing. Justice was also a bad choice, as her trials would not make for good viewing. And Shiren wasn’t ready for real visitors, not yet. Now that she was awake, and receiving some of my mana and the patterns I had given to her, she was coming along nicely, but her dungeon just wasn’t ready yet.

That left Silver Mercy, Salles de la Muerte, and Favela de Sangue. Salles and Sangue both offered more ‘traditional’ dungeon experiences, from what I had been told. And they would definitely be a nice addition to Fernvalley’s show. But Silver Mercy, she could be a good choice. Her style of dungeon was more about spiritual trials than outright danger and death, so it would make a nice corollary to my dungeon, which was more about breaking someone’s spirit instead of challenging them to rise above.

When I considered it like that, Silver Mercy was definitely the one to offer the deal to. Plus, she dealt with tourists all day, anyway, being a famous shrine, and a shrine maiden before the Apocalypse. With that in mind, I opened up a chat window.

Private Chat   (Exotic Pleasures, Silver   Mercy) open.

Exotic Pleasures: Mercy-san, do   you have a moment?

Silver Mercy: Pleasures? No, I   don’t want to see whatever depraved tentacle monster you made. I told you the   last time that just because there’s a lot of hentai like that, doesn’t mean   everyone is a pervert like you!

Exotic Pleasures: Oh, don’t be   like that. I was mostly joking, anyways. But this isn’t about the Violation   Beast. Nothing ‘naughty’, I promise you.

Silver Mercy: *sigh* I know you   at least keep to the letter of your words, so I’ll trust that, this time.   What did you want to speak with me about?

Exotic Pleasures: Well, I’m sure   you’ve seen on the news that aliens other than our Ambassadors have started   showing up, right?

Silver Mercy: Yes, and I note   that, just after they visited your dungeon, one of the shrine-ships came   straight to Japan, where they’re working on creating a church. Not of any kami   I’m aware of.

Exotic Pleasures: Yes, Zedara is   one of the deities enshrined in my dungeon. She sent her servants here, after   feeling the flow of power from new worshippers from this planet all of a   sudden. I suggested to her priestess that she move to Japan, and work alongside   one of the producers of hentai mangas and anime, to try and expand their   reach.

Silver Mercy: Should I be worried   about them?

Exotic Pleasures: Oh, no. Their faith   doesn’t get hostile to anyone who leaves them alone. They simply are devoted   to pleasure, and submission within the harem. They’ll be good neighbors, if   any of the priests living in you want to do some cross-cultural bonding.

Silver Mercy: Ugh, a goddess of   harems, really?

Exotic Pleasures: *laughs* Well,   it could be worse, you know. I sent the servant of the God of Slavery to   Eastern Europe, and the priest of the god of, shall we say, nonconsensual sexual   relations to Africa.

Silver Mercy: Fine. I’ll admit   that you sent the least objectionable of the three this way.

Exotic Pleasures: Anyways, the priestly   types aren’t who I wanted to talk to you about.

Silver Mercy: So, some other   aliens?

Exotic Pleasures: Yes, I   currently have a, well, interstellar reality show host in my dungeon right   now. His whole thing is that he tours dungeons and broadcasts them for all   the people who never are going to set foot in a dungeon. Same idea as things   like Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous.

Silver Mercy: And what does this   have to do with me?

Exotic Pleasures: Well, if he   can get to the final floor of my dungeon, I’ve promised him an interview with   my avatar, who everyone thinks is my dungeon boss. Much like how you use that   Kitsune avatar.

Silver Mercy: Is that wise? We   all agreed that we weren’t going to reveal to the world that some of us   dungeons were former humans.

Exotic Pleasures: I do take   precautions. The only people who know that I am a former human are bound, either   to me personally, or by a contract, so they can’t spread that information.   They will have to sign a contract before I speak with them, just in case.

Silver Mercy: All right, I’m   glad you’re being careful. None of us want to ruin what we have right now.   But I’m still not sure what this has to do with me.

Exotic Pleasures: Well, since he’s   come all this way, he’s likely to do a tour of some other dungeons for his show.

Silver Mercy: And, what, you   wanted to send him my way?

Exotic Pleasures: I was going to   give you the right of first refusal, yes. He typically gets a local   adventurer to act as a guide and ‘local color’ for his party as they dive a   dungeon. They can’t do that with my dungeon, because their species looks too   much like human children for any locals to consent to that, except for the   real sickos that they don’t want to be around. But with yours, they could get   one of your ‘regulars’, and tour the dungeon, showing off your best features   to the galaxy, maybe getting some increased traffic, and even a few   conversions for your kami.

Silver Mercy: I am NOT going to   be like those televangelists you have in America!

Exotic Pleasures: Of course,   not. But you have the words of the kami written there, and the trials promote   spiritualism. You can lead a horse to water, but that doesn’t mean you’re   forcing them to drink.

Silver Mercy: Well, that’s better,   then. And what do you get out of all this? I refuse to believe that you’re   doing this out of the goodness of that cesspool you call a heart.

Exotic Pleasures: Aw, you’re too   sweet. But it is simple, really. I would like a bottle of your favorite alcohol,   so I can entertain you properly if we ever meet face to face, as it were.

Silver Mercy: W-what? Why would   you want something like that? You’re not thinking about enslaving me, too,   are you?

Exotic Pleasures: No, as I said   before, I enslaved that lovely young dungeon because it was the easiest way   to save her. I don’t think you need saving right now, do you?

Silver Mercy: Absolutely not!   People love me!

Exotic Pleasures: So I have no   reason to enslave you. Well, other than simply wanting to possess you, but I’m   not some rabid animal that goes after every tasty snack I see. The benefits   of owning you are far outweighed by the consequences of uniting the other   dungeons against me if I took you by force and enslaved you against your   will.

Silver Mercy: Uh, thanks. I   guess.

Exotic Pleasures: Anyway, send   me a trade with your favorite alcohol, and I’ll be sure to suggest that the celebrity   visits you next, before he goes and does something stupid, like trying to   visit Iahab.

Silver Mercy: Oh, hell, that’s   the last thing any of us want! At least Sangue and the others will give them   a decent dungeon fight, but Iahab? Those savages will get Earth nuked by   someone!

Exotic Pleasures: Yes. While Iahab   may just be focused on forcing as many trainees through as possible, boosting   their levels so that they can take more punishment on their missions, there   is no way that they will just sit back and let the celebrity get anywhere   near the dungeon without trying to do something stupid. Which would make the   rest of us have to step in and take steps.

Silver Mercy: And that’s the   last thing any of us want.

Exotic Pleasures: Indeed.

Silver Mercy: Fine, I agree. I’ll   send you a bottle.

Exotic Pleasures: Excellent! I’ll   make sure to have plenty of it on hand, when we eventually meet. Great thing   about being a dungeon is that the liquor is always aged perfectly, even if I   conjure it just a second before the pour.

Silver Mercy: You talk like an   old man.

Exotic Pleasures: Haha! Perhaps   I do. There’s—

Exotic Pleasures: I’m sorry, my   dear, but I have to go. The visiting zealots are getting a bit rambunctious.

Silver Mercy: Fine. But don’t be   terrible to them!

Exotic Pleasures: Sorry, <static   noise> you’re breaking up!

Silver Mercy: You know that   writing <static noise> doesn’t actually make noise, right?

Exotic Pleasures: <whistles   innocently> Really? Well, learn something new every day. See you, Mercy!

As I broke the connection, I turned my full attention to the leader of the much-tarnished Golden Host and her party. They had fought their way through the lower levels, managing to get all the way through the Water Temple on their second try. Their numbers had been reduced to six, with only an Orcad Blessed Berserker being remaining as the ‘male’ section of their group.

The water temple had only claimed two, despite the Vurlocks being natural swimmers, and the floor spawning in ten of them in a group to start off with. The other two deaths had come earlier, as one of the females fell prey to my Hunter, who managed to rip her throat out, and the Fungal Zombies managed to fully convert the Crusader-Chaplain who relied too heavily on the [Turn Undead] skill, not realizing that they weren’t actually undead. By the time the others managed to clear the zombies off them, he only had seconds before the transformation was complete.

But getting through the Water Temple just meant that, now, they were heading to the lair of my Vampire Ranger, and things were about to get much more interesting.