Lewd Dungeon, Chapter 344 (Patreon)

Chapter 344 – Aftermath

Thankfully, healing grievous wounds like a severed spine was something Bargulg’s healer pet could accomplish, even before she hit Tier 3. Sure, it took a bunch of mana to do quickly, but it wasn’t like she’d been in the fight, and this was the end of the dungeon, for now. No reason to hold back.

For my avatar, well, healing the gaping hole where Bargulg’s cannon had hit me was also not too difficult. It just took a good deal of mana, and focus. The wounds were caused by a mortal weapon, after all, not a divine one, or a godslayer, so it just took a bit of time and focus to restore what was lost. Not something that I could do in the middle of battle, but not a problem for me, either.

Once that was done, I sat upon my throne, and looked out at Bargulg and his followers. I nodded to them, and said, “Once more, I congratulate you, Bargulg Parod. That move with using a [Mage Hand] spell to control a weapon is not something that most people would have come up with. After all, the spell moves too slowly and clumsily for it to be useful with many attacks.”

Bargulg grinned, and said, “Which is why I needed to use it with the cannon, instead of my other weapon. So long as I had the cannon aimed in a single direction, all I needed to do was draw you in front of it, without making you aware of the threat. Using a breath attack as a last-second distraction sealed the deal. Though I admit getting a spear through the spine was not part of my plan.”

I laughed at that, and said, “Well, I should hope not. Any plan that involves you getting speared instead of doing the spearing is a bad plan. Unless you’re into that kind of thing. I’m a God of Pleasures, after all, so I don’t kink shame.”

The Warborn Magus of the Blade proved that the facepalm was a universal gesture as he groaned. “My Lord, that was particularly terrible.”

I chuckled, but didn’t continue with that line of teasing. “Well, first off, let me congratulate you all for being the first party to clear the dungeon on this mode. You’re also the first party to get all the way through the desert floors. Before we continue, allow me to grant you your just rewards.”

I waved a hand, and a chest appeared in front of Bargulg’s party. Inside were some Tier 3 materials. A stack of metal ingots, several bolts of cloth, and some tanned leather hides. All of which would be useful in creating weapons or armor for Tier 3 adventurers. More importantly, they were easier for me to make than stacks of coin or magic items.

“With these materials, you should be able to lessen the burden of upgrading your armor and secondary weapons to suit your new tier. Normally, I could not be so generous for someone who only managed a draw on the final battle, but exceptions can be made for the first ones who manage a feat, as you saw earlier, when you managed that perfect run through the gauntlet in the crypts before the Ranger’s Mansion. I was quite impressed with the way you handled yourselves, throughout the dungeon, even when some of the different tricks and traps surprised you.”

Bargulg bowed his head as his women stored the crafting materials away. “My thanks, my Lord. And, may I say that this dungeon has indeed been full of surprises. Even with the knowledge we gained from the adventurers on the surface, before coming down here, there were times where we were pushed to the limit. Even when we outleveled the bosses by a substantial amount, they were clever and resourceful in how they fought us.”

“Well, that is one benefit of having pets as my bosses, for the most part, instead of dungeon creatures. The plants and slimes are easy to modify and create more of, but they are rarely intelligent beyond animal instinct. Thinking creatures, however, can do a lot more, especially when they know they have their own rewards for good performances, or punishments if they fail to impress.”

The little sorceress on his team blinked, and said, “Is that why dungeons that have ‘awakened’ tend to use smarter creatures as their bosses, even if there are more powerful ones out there? Because they’re more adaptable?”

“Indeed. ‘Awakened’ dungeons, as you call them, are hunters. There are different types of dungeons, obviously, but they are all united by the fact that, to succeed, you need to be able to adapt to the different things adventurers can do. This isn’t some game where bosses have the same attack patterns that someone can learn and then use to do the whole thing blindfolded. Any hunter needs to be able to not only stalk their prey, but adapt when they do something unexpected.

“On the other hand, successful dungeons also know that they have to keep things from being too dangerous. A reputation as a deathtrap means that adventurers avoid the dungeon, and they are unable to feed and grow. If things get too out of hand, then the dungeon may be declared rogue, and dungeonkillers are brought in. Having intelligent bosses helps in that regard, because they can more easily adjust their tactics to keep from being completely overwhelming and unfair.”

“And the dungeon contracts reinforce this,” the priestess of the group said.

“Exactly. The dungeon contracts I devised limit the dungeons who sign them in some ways, and free them in others. They have limits put on what they can do against those who sign the contract, but can use anything and everything at their disposal against those who don’t, without any fear of being declared rogue, even if things are completely unfair. After all, those adventurers aren’t playing by the rules, and so aren’t protected like the others.

“In the same way, the contracts limit and protect the adventurers who sign it. They are protected, because they know there are limits to what the dungeon can and cannot do. So, they know that the dungeon will be tough, but won’t be actively trying to slaughter them. However, they are limited, because they will have restrictions on the kinds of gear they can use, and may be called to help protect the dungeon against those who would try and destroy it.

“That is how the dungeon contracts I’ve spread across this planet, and begun spreading through the galaxy work. Both sides are limited in some way, but generally both sides find that there are benefits to this arrangement. It is my hope that this kind of contract can spread to all dungeons in the galaxy. That will be a great benefit to dungeonkind, and the adventurers who delve the dungeons will see results, as well.”

Bargulg smiled. “And the fact that, in a few generations, the number of dungeonslayers will decrease, since there will be less call for their kind of work, is a happy side effect, yes?”

“Naturally,” I chuckled. “I do not deny that dungeonslayers have had their place in the past. Rogue dungeons exist, and they must be dealt with. I, myself, have killed a rogue dungeon here on Earth, and another has just recently been slain for going rogue. However, if adventurers and dungeons work together to take on those rogues, then things are healthier in the long run than having some vigilante who tries to slay all dungeons due to a rogue killing their family or something like that. Especially when the rogue dungeons send their monsters to attack outside the area they influence.

“Anyone who willingly sets foot in a dungeon, contract or no, accepts some level of risk to their lives. But if, for instance, I sent monsters outside of my influence on the surface to start attacking people in Miami, then that makes me a threat even to those who do not sign up as adventurers. Threats like that have to be fought, which means that someone will look for whatever means necessary to do so. Thus, dungeonkillers will still be necessary, from time to time. But it is in my interest to keep them rare, so that they do not get tempted to stretch the definition of what a rogue dungeon is.”

“Because when you have a really nice hammer, you start looking for nails to use it on, yes?”

“Exactly. Dungeons and Adventurers are symbiotic to some degree. Both need the other to grow stronger, but both are threatened by the other, by their very nature. So, I use the contracts to try and contain threats before they develop.”

I took a breath, and then said, “But enough of that. I have held off on devising new floors for the dungeon until someone managed to conquer all the ones that went before. I wish to continue the theme of different environments for the next three floors. The locals are not ready for three floors of water levels, and I’ve done plenty of swamps. Since I just did deserts, the question is what environment to do next. Any suggestions?”

Bargulg looked at his companions, and then said, “It would depend on what your intentions are, my Lord. If you wanted to intensify what you’ve already started with the desert heat, then volcanic floors, with lava flows and creatures of fire would be the best choice. On the other hand, if you’re looking to take a different route, then your best options would be underground caves or snowy mountains.”

“With respect, my Lord,” offered the rogue of the group, “if you were looking to make a theme of things, then you could have things go from the desert, to the caves, to frosty mountains, and then have the mountains erupt in flames, leading to a volcanic wasteland. Even if each ‘stage’ is three floors, that would give a simple theme, and hidden messages or secret rooms hidden behind trapped passageways could foreshadow what is coming in the different floors. You might even make up lore for why the floors are the way that they are.”

I blinked for a second, and then laughed. “Hah! This is why I make sure to keep ties to the mortals, despite being what I am. The mortal perspective always offers new and interesting ideas. Yes, I can see it now. A journey starting in the harsh desert, leading to a series of forgotten caverns underneath the pyramid, which lead to a portal to a frozen world the adventurers must venture through, before all things erupt in fire and flames, which they have to fight their way through to reach the next stage. Yes, I like it, and I’m sure I can have some fun creating the story for these levels.”

Bargulg bowed low, and said, “We are pleased to be of assistance, my Lord.”

I grinned at him, and said, “And of assistance you have been. More than that, I have immensely enjoyed seeing how my dungeon, in one of its strongest forms, compared to the strongest group to yet delve its depths. In token of that, I shall offer the location of two other dungeons you might wish to report on to the guild you came from.”

The Dragonborn Ascendant raised his head, and said, “Other dungeons like yours, my Lord?”

“Like, but not like. They are dungeons which have proven interesting in some way, and are each awakened. The first is the Prisoner’s Lament dungeon, a city dungeon on the site of a terrible tragedy, which has devoted itself to memorializing the events there. The second is the Silver Mercy dungeon, a temple dungeon which has created a rather interesting series of trials based on a video game series, with each trial forcing people to battle again and again until they learn to defeat each boss in turn.”

“I’ve seen dungeons of those types before. Both those types. However, they are incredibly rare, as far as I know. How did such a thing come to be?”

“Well, before the System, there were only humans here. With the System’s initialization, some humans were changed into all manner of creatures. The Silver Mercy and Prisoner’s Lament dungeons were former humans, and they’ve done a good job of balancing the needs of their dungeons and keeping a respectful dialogue with the local adventurers and governments. I think you’ll find them enlightening.”

I took another breath, and snapped my fingers to open a portal to the entrance hall. “But now, Bargulg Parod and companions, it is time for you to depart. I believe that the people in Swamptown above will be most pleased to hear of your triumph. I daresay that you will not need to pay for any drinks this evening, once you’ve given your report to the local Guild.”