White Men Can't Jump (1992, Ron Shelton) (Patreon)
Content
64/100
Second viewing, last seen during its original theatrical release. Think I was quite disappointed at the time—Shelton had followed Bull Durham, which I loved, with Blaze, which I did not, and my anticipation for another sports movie from this particular filmmaker was sky high. Street basketball's perhaps a little too rooted in macho histrionics for my taste, though (so many yo mama jokes here), and there's just no question that Shelton's own experience in baseball's minor leagues afforded him a deep-rooted, clear-eyed affection that he's never been able to match when tackling other disciplines (though Tin Cup's final game comes close, in part because Shelton brings out something unique in Costner). So my dim memory was dominated by damnation, and I was pleasantly surprised to find, this time around, that the first hour or so—up to and including the point at which Billy discovers that Sidney's hustled him, in a long-con way—fires on all cylinders. The initial meet-hostile feels strained, but Snipes and Harrelson develop superb prickly chemistry from there, and Shelton shoots the court with a practiced eye for how specific movements will cut together, without making it feel as if all of the athleticism has been manufactured in the editing room. Gloria constantly being quizzed for Jeopardy prep stays just on the right side of quirky vs. cutesy. My one big reservation—surely the opposing teams would realize that they'd been hoodwinked once they see Billy play, and violently object—got answered via the twist I'd completely forgotten. Halfway through, I was ready to call my younger self an idiot and potentially add White Men Can't Jump to my '92 top 10 list (which is so strong that a film rated 75 doesn't make the cut).
Turns out my issues were probably with the back half. Most of what follows the big revelation—and I want to stress that I love the casual way that's handled, with Gloria and Rhonda working out an arrangement despite the latter flatly refusing to give back a dime of what Sidney hustled—just doesn't feel credible to me. Yes, Billy's a total fuckup and a gambling addict of sorts, but would he really bet his entire piddly net worth on his ability to dunk, which he must know that he can't reliably do? (That he and Sidney then win the final game on Billy's dunk is the kind of schematic Hollywood bullshit that Bull Durham entirely avoids; we never even see Crash break the minor-league home run record.) How does Sidney knowing a security guard who works whatever lot Jeopardy shoots on in any way help Gloria become a contestant? "This woman isn't on the list, but she's somehow physically in the building." "Mic her up!" And then the taping isn't even much fun—just a montage of her giving correct answers (questions, sorry), with more Hollywood nonsense in one of the categories being an offbeat subject that we previously saw her brag about having mastered. I do give Shelton enormous credit for the boldly anti-Hollywood move of having Gloria dump Billy again, without in any way hinting that they might eventually reconcile; he leaves these two guys as damaged goods, and that's not nothing. But there's too much drivel in the home stretch for this to be remotely in Durham's league.