Hands on a Hardbody: The Documentary (1997, S.R. Bindler) (Patreon)

64/100

Second viewing, last seen during its original U.S. theatrical release in 1999. Reality TV hadn't quite happened yet back then—just The Real World, basically—so it's remarkable, revisiting this now, to see just how much it anticipates the competition/elimination subgenre that Survivor would kick off a year later. Only problem is that the Hands on a Hardbody* contest wasn't expressly designed to be filmed, and ran continuously for over three days; consequently, Bindler, who can't always be shooting, misses virtually every big moment, including the victory. (As described, the slip-up that eliminates [SPOILER] would have been amazing to actually witness; clearly, it was catnip for Robert Altman, who was prepping a fictionalized version of this doc at the time of his death.) Still surprisingly gripping, especially given that the extreme challenge here involves just standing around doing nothing whatsoever—I'd misremembered who wins (that person finishes 4th) and got sucked in all over again. Bindler, who also edited, isn't much of a filmmaker, relying too heavily on amateurish dissolves—it doesn't surprise me that he's made nothing of note since—but he deserves credit for capturing a diverse collection of memorable East Texas personalities, with previous champ Benny Perkins in particular serving up a nonstop stream of colorful commentary. Wish he'd done post-contest interviews with some of the folks who didn't win, though. How did [SPOILER] feel about receiving $250 for 2nd place, which at 78 hours amounts to a whopping $3.20/hour? I get comped almost that much playing poker (by the casino), and I get to sit down. 

* I originally logged the title as Hands on a Hard Body—two words—and am 90% confident that it appeared that way onscreen at the time, since I was no less anal-retentive about such matters then than I am now. However, the version of the film that was restored a few years ago (and is currently available to stream via Sundance Now) clearly reads Hardbody. Since I recall there being considerable inconsistency back in '99, I'm gonna consider this Bindler's final say, and have made the change accordingly. Plus it just reads better as a single word.