Mommy Lessons, Chapter 9 (Patreon)

Lesson Nine: Introducing Some Chaos

“There was this little boy who came to see me a few times. As timid as timid could be. He could barely answer the most simple of questions without hemming and hawing about his answer for a good ten minutes. It was kind of adorable, but kind of annoying.

“But, this boy - Davey - he could take just about anything you threw at him. I’d tell him to lick my shoes, and he’d do it. I’d tell him to put my panties over his head and he’d do it. He’d never complain. He’d never backtalk.

“Yet, I couldn’t have a conversation with him to save my life. Or his. Just this complete bundle of nerves whenever it came time to talk. So, I had know idea what he liked or didn’t. I just threw everything at him, waiting for the day when he said ‘no’ to something. But he never did. Never. And at first, you know, I felt bad. It felt like I was somehow taking advantage of someone who didn’t know better than to speak out.

“Sure enough, Davey kept making appointments. He was coming back for more, time after time. And after every session, I thought to myself that it would be the last time I saw him. But then, a month or so later, I’d get a message from him looking to set up another session.

“He became my favorite client. He was a blank slate - a punching bag, even. That sounds a little mean, I suppose, but he didn’t seem to care. And because he wasn’t able to tell me otherwise, I had grown to assume that it was my willingness to try anything on him that kept bringing him back. I mean, you name it and I tried it. Hair pulling. Crops and whips. Riding him around like a horse. Spraying down my yard so that it was a mud pit and having him roll around in it. Filling his diaper with just about everything I could find in my kitchen. You’d be surprised how satisfying the sound of a man sitting in a diaper full of corn flakes is.

“Most of the babies who come to me have these elaborate ideas and fantasies - you know - these daydreams they probably masturbate to three times a week - they’re like directors, you know? I open up the door, and there’s Steven Spielberg in a diaper, and he’s got some very exciting ideas about a scene where he’s ‘caught’ loading his pants in the bathroom.

“My point is that my favorite babies have been the ones that come to me with little sense of their own agency. They want someone else to do the work for them. They’re the baby, I’m the Mommy, and that’s literally all they need to know upfront. That’s what I like the most. And you? You, dumpling? That’s you.”

“It...it is?”

“Oh yeah. I tossed an enema and some baby wipes in your hand and asked you to hold them and you did. No questions asked. No matter how weird or awkward you felt you looked.”

“Well...you told me to, so…”

“You’re just very obedient. And unlike Davey, you’re communicative. And you know what you haven’t told me yet?”

“No?”

“Exactly. ‘No.’ I feel like I’ve asked a lot of you in a short amount of time. A lot, especially for someone who’s never so-much as worn a diaper in the past. Yet you never say no.”

“I mean...I could say no if I wanted to.”

Averie laughed.

We had thrown everything into the backseat of her SUV and we were on the road again. However, I had remembered the way we came into the store, but we seemed to be heading in the opposite direction now.

“Where are we going?” I asked.

“Pacifier, Dumpling,” she said to me. I exhaled loudly and took it from the cup holder in the middle console where I left it earlier, popping it back into my mouth.

“Just up the road here, there’s a park. Between you and me, it’s kind of a shithole. They really let the place go to hell. But, thankfully, we’re not going there for the scenery.”

That hadn’t really provided much insight, but I let it go - not that I had a choice. Thankfully, I didn’t have long to ponder it, as it was just as close as she had indicated it was. We drove down a long access road to a small parking lot that was almost completely empty, save for a parked truck.

“As I figured,” she stated, surveying the area as she parked in the lot. “This place is good for two things, as far as I’m concerned: fishing and as a quick rest stop when you need to change your baby’s diaper. And we don’t have a fishing pole with us today, so…”

I made an embarrassing noise with my nose from the surprise - not quite a snort, but not quite a deep breath either.

But she didn’t wait for me to catch my breath. She simply got out of the car and opened up the back hatch before lowering the back seats.

“Whenever you’re ready,” she said.

I didn’t move yet. I was going to - but I hadn’t quite found the will to get my diaper changed in the back of Averie’s SUV. At the very least, the back of the car was pointed at the woods. While it was possible someone could see me in a pretty compromising situation, it seemed like they’d have to work pretty hard for that to happen.

“Please don’t make me ask again,” she said. That was my cue.

I slid out of the passenger seat and waddled back. I layed on my back on a blanket she had laid out in the now-extended rear of the vehicle. She took care of the rest. She didn’t just pull my pants down, she pulled them off along with my shoes. Just as she had earlier, she was an efficient diaper-changing machine. Thank goodness.

“Here’s what made me think of Little Davey,” she said, holding up the shopping back from the store. “I wondered what I’d want to do with him right now, if we had been in a similar situation. The answer seemed a little obvious…”

She pulled the enema out from the bag.

“What do you think about that?”

My eyes grew big. I just about spit out the pacifier so I could ask her if she was serious.

But, there was only one word that mattered to her right now. And I wasn’t saying it. She waited, too, just in case I needed more time to decide that I wanted to reject it. It didn’t happen.

She opened the package and pulled the enema from it. It was a small plastic bottle with a long nozzle attached to it. I supposed I knew of them, but I just never really got that good of a look at one before. I didn’t need one before.

I didn’t want one before.

“This is similar to the suppository from yesterday,” she said. “Similar...but not the same. How about a little game?”

Wasn’t all of this a game? Still, I couldn’t help myself. I wanted to play, and so I nodded.

“I thought so. I was thinking I wouldn’t have given you much of a choice anyways, so I’m glad we’re at least on the same page.”

She carefully removed the orange cap from the bottle’s applicator, a long thin plastic chute. She held it up again, so that I had a very clear view of what she was about to use on me.

“If you can hold it in you until we get home, you can have anything you want. Name it, and you can have it.”

That seemed way too good to be true. Either there had to be a catch, or she had absolutely no faith in my ability to hold it in. I pulled the pacifier from my mouth. I just needed to ask.

“A-anything?”

“Oh, up for the challenge I see?”

What did I want? ‘Anything’ was vast and huge. It was probably littered with loopholes. Assuming I got to that point at all. But what did I want?

Really, there was only one thing I could think of. I might’ve even been able to have it if I asked in just the right way.

Her.

I put the pacifier in my mouth without saying another word. There was no use dwelling on the possibilities too much now, before she even plunged the enema into my asshole.

She lifted my legs straight up and bent them so that my knees were on my chest. I felt the cold rigid nozzle slide into my bottom and ease into me. Then came the liquid. Truthfully, I barely felt it, except for the initial burst of cool liquid flowing into my rectum.

I watched Averie’s head turn as she seemed to be looking at something in the parking lot beyond my view. All the while she continued to gently push the enema’s contents into me.

“Hi there,” Averie said to someone.

I felt my face simultaneously become bone white while also feeling like it was on fire. Who was out there? What could they see?

Whoever it was said something, though I couldn’t hear what it was.

“Oh, you know,” Averie said. “Just giving my little girl an enema.”

Was she serious? Did she seriously just say that to somebody? A stranger?

Another muffled response.

“An enema,” Averie repeated. “EN-E-MA.”

The stranger said something else.

“Yes, that’s right,” she said. “Just going to fill her up and put a diaper on her.”

The stranger responded again. I still couldn’t make out a single word they said.

“Alright, sounds good. Have a nice day!” Averie then looked back to me and laughed and shook her head. “He was an old man. Couldn’t hear a damn thing I said.”

That gave me the slightest bit of relief, but not enough. She had me on my back in the back of her car, my legs bent up to my face with an enema sticking out of my ass, and yet she was able to have a nonchalant conversation with a stranger about it.

But, I did trust her. This wasn’t her first rodeo, nor would it be her last. She knew what she was doing, and if she was careless in any way, it would jeopardize her ability to keep at it. And...I wanted to believe that she cared about me.

She finally eased the enema nozzle from me and showed me the empty bottle.

“See? All gone. It’s all inside you now, believe it or not. Not too much longer now, it’s going to want to come back out. So, let’s get you back into a diaper, yes?”

We were back on the road soon after, heading back to her house. I tried to recall how long it had taken for us to get to the store. Maybe 20 minutes? I didn’t know much about enemas, but that seemed like it might be enough time.

Anything. That was what she promised.

“How are you feeling?” she asked.

It was hard to say. With the suppository from the day before, I felt like I went from feeling nothing at all to feeling a gradually increasing discomfort. If nothing else, I could feel the enema’s contents inside of me. I felt bloated and heavy.

I just shrugged.

“I have a rule,” she said. “Well...actually, I have a lot of rules. But there’s a rule that I hold myself to, and it might even be the most important one: Never make someone experience something that you haven’t experienced yourself.”

My eyes darted from the window to her face, my eyes growing big. Did this mean that she had…

“Everything you’ve done, I’ve done before. Or some variation thereof. I couldn’t possibly subject you to something I wasn’t willing to be subjected to. And, you know, there are some things that I’ve tried that I don’t want to do to anyone else, because I didn’t enjoy them.”

I was missing details, but the implications were huge. I couldn’t even imagine someone as confident and commanding as Averie in a diaper. Or having been administered an enema. I wondered who did this for her. And, if she was making me sit here in a diaper after getting an enema of my own - did that mean that she liked the one she got?

“I’m not going to pull any tricks here,” she said. “It’s not like I’m going to start driving 10 miles per hour just to ensure you don’t have a chance of getting home clean.”

I gave her a skeptical look.

“I’m not going to lie - I don’t think you’re going to make it regardless. But I’m going to give you a fair chance.”

I wanted to ask her about her experiences. I wanted to know all about the things she had done. But...I also needed to concentrate on the growing tension in my sloshing abdomen.

To her credit, it did feel like she was going at a decent speed. She stayed pretty quiet too. I never wanted to call her “chatty,” but...sometimes she did seem to monologue a bit. Either she was giving me space to focus, or she was just enjoying the show. Both - that was also an option.

Anything.

That’s what she said. I wanted that. With every cramp I told myself that. Really - I wasn’t even sure that I cared what the prize was. I wanted to prove to her that I could last.

EASTHAMPTON - 15 MILES. I sighed. Staring out the window while focusing on objects blur by the window had been my primary way of distracting myself, but seeing that sign only reminded me how much further we’d have to go before we’d be back at her place.

The longer the drive went on, the more I started to feel the primary difference between the suppository and my current enema. At the apex of my discomfort with the suppository, I still felt like I had control. Well...up until I didn’t. But I very much felt like I ultimately had control. The enema felt...different. It felt more urgent. There was going to be a point where it wouldn’t just be too uncomfortable to continue holding it - but it might be impossible.

I quickly glanced to Averie. She was smiling. Of course she was. I would be too if I were her.

I was fidgeting. Shaking. My foot was tapping, trying to match my heart rate - thought it would never catch up.

We must be close. We have to be close now.

EASTHAMPTON - 10 MILES. That seemed completely unreal to me.

“Are you fucking kidding me right now?” I said, spitting out my pacifier.

“That’s a very naughty word, isn’t it?” She was as calm and smug as she usually was, though I could sense that I had stepped on a trap. “Little girls should not be using language like that.”

“I...uhm...but…” I stopped talking, quickly jamming the pacifier back into my mouth.

“I won’t be forgetting that,” she said.

It was hopeless. I had been a fool. Of course she knew better - she was Mommy. She was “Mommy” to so many pathetic little babies. She had seen it all.

I felt the tiniest squirt of liquid shoot from by cheeks and into the diaper. I let out a gasp, quickly trying to retain control. She just shook her head - maybe not aware of what had happened, though I’m sure she could guess.

“Are you going to keep pretending you have something to prove to me?” she asked.

I nodded, slowly.

“This is what it means to be a baby, Daisy. You know what you want to do - but you can’t. No matter how hard you try. You’re too little. Too pathetic. Too helpless. Alas, you won’t make it. And so you’re left with a choice now: Do you keep up this laughable charade a little longer; only making yourself look more foolish when you inevitably fail? Or, do you just give in and let your little baby body do its thing? Personally, I think the answer is rather clear.”

I laughed to myself. She was right, as she tended to be. I wondered if I had missed the entire point of this exercise - I wasn’t supposed to take it as a challenge, I was supposed to just accept the reality.

Or maybe I was overthinking it.

Either way, I shit myself right then and there. I lifted my bottom up from the seat as high as the seat belt would allow and relinquished the tight grip my body had on the hell that it was holding back. A violent blast of warm liquid was unleashed into the diaper. That wasn’t all, of course - the flood had carried with it every bit of debris it could collect along the way. The sounds coming from my body - an unholy cacophony of squelches and streams of liquid - made it abundantly clear what was happening. It had all been so effortless and quick that, for a moment, I believed that I had only expelled pure liquid into the diaper. Pissing from my ass. Embarrassing - but it seemed better than what the suppositories had done to me.

I was very wrong.

Sitting back down on the filled diaper revealed that I wasn’t wearing a soggy diaper. It was a swamp. I was sitting in soup. Stew, more specifically. A mushy sludge that was too thick to be absorbed by the diaper’s lining, but too thin to just stay in one spot. My ass displaced it all throughout the diaper. I felt like I was wearing a bowl of corn chowder.

“See?” Averie said, her face positively radiating with an expression of ‘I told you so.’ “Better out than in, Dumpling. You wouldn’t have made it. You’re a baby.”

Dumpling. It just felt like a dig. My blushing intensified.

“We’ll be home soon enough. I’ll take you into the backyard and spray you off with the hose.”

I gasped, looking at her with pleading eyes. I’d have taken out the pacifier to beg out loud too, but the comfort provided by my suckling seemed to be all I had right now.

“I’m kidding,” she said, rolling down her window.. “Though, I’ve done it before. Very satisfying.”

EASTHAMPTON - NEXT EXIT. I sighed, wondering what could have been.

“What would you have wanted?” she asked a little later, as we turned onto the final street to her house.

I tilted my head, not sure I got the context.

“If you had, miraculously, made it home without filling your diaper. What would you have wanted?”

I debated about whether or not I should tell the truth. I took the pacifier from my mouth - hoping that by the time I actually opened my mouth, I’d know what to say.

But I didn’t. So I just told the truth instead: “You.”

“Me?”

I nodded.

“Someone has some stockholm syndrome, yes?”

“N-no, I don’t think so. I’m pretty sure that…”

“It would’ve been a silly thing to ask for, Baby.”

Again, I looked at her with confusion.

“You already had me,” she said.

I wasn’t completely sure what she meant by that. But it warmed my heart almost as much as the warm mass I was sitting on.