Ask Me Anything answers and a question about playlists (Patreon)

I was going to share a holiday music mix, but the newest version of  itunes has made it impossible to convert songs to mp3s so I'm a bit  stuck till I can get  back to my old computer. When I do that, do you  want my 2016 playlist or has the year been so awful that you'd rather  just forget the whole damn thing? Would a hopeful mix for 2017 be  better?

I'm also tragically behind on  the Ask Me Anything questions so here they are. Feel free to send me  more and I'll try to answer them more promptly in 2017.

Q.  What are your thoughts on how to stay true to yourself, in terms of sex  positivity, body etc., if you have to function in an environment that  is extremely conservative, and requires one to fit into a more  stereotypical role?
I'm afraid I'm a terrible person to  ask about this, as I've spent most of my life surrounded by utter  weirdos. When I worked in a conservative environment (as a secretary in a  life insurance company) the best policy I could come up with was to  simply not speak at all, which is surprisingly easy when you only work  two days a week and for one, somewhat anti-social, boss. I may have been  over correcting, coming straight from a domme house to an incredibly  staid environment, but the few encounters I did have with this society  (people who found striped socks outrageous, a woman in her 50's who  could NOT POSSIBLY wear pink nail polish, a man who didn't know what a  myth was) lead me to believe that these people and I just did not some  from the same planet.

Assuming you don't feel  *quite* so alienated from your fellow coworkers, there's probably some  common ground you can find with them, and you can feel that they don't  think you're an alien either. The good thing about a conservative work  place is that it's expected that you don't share all *that* much of your  personal life so I'd imagine a lot of the sex/body positivity you would  be talking about at work would be theoretical, so you can express  opinions on, say, polyamory, without actually coming out as polamorous.  In this case, I would like to point out the awesome power of pretending  things are normal.

There's this weird thing (which a lot of  gaslighting is based on) where if you pretend something is normal,  people will often take your word on it. Telling people about my dad  became FAR less dramatic when I stopped acting like it was dramatic. If I  sat someone down, said "I have something very weird/important/secret  that I have to tell tell you....my father is transsexual." The reaction  was MUCH bigger than if I was just telling a story that somehow involved  my dad being trans and I added "Oh, my dad is trans," as if it were no  big deal.

So, my imagined scenario for you  is, you are at work and a co-worker says "Oh wow, did you hear about  these WEIRDOS who are gay/kinky/poly/trans/furries?" and you listen to  them for a moment and react as though they had said "Did you hear about  these weirdos who like to wear orange clothing?" with a shrug and  something along the lines of "Hm, well, as long as they're happy." If  they push, you can act a bit puzzled as to why they're so shocked, maybe  ask "well, why do you think this is so strange?" or "Why are you so  concerned with this? It doesn't really effect you."

Body  positivity is a bit easier. If someone says something like "I'm so fat"  or "I have to lose weight" you can just say "I think you look great."  or if someone says something disparaging about someone else's body, you  can say "I think they look great and I don't think that's really  appropriate office talk."

I hope that was helpful.

Q:Has Patreon been worth it? How hard is it to keep up? How hard is it to get patrons?

Patreon  has DEFINITELY been worth it. It's harder to keep up with than I  thought (as evidenced by me not posting every day.) It's hard to know  what people want you to post and I often find myself wondering if people  will be disappointed by what I post or if they're disappointed that I  don't post more. I've lost a few patrons along the way, so I worry a  little, but I've also gained patrons so I stay around the same number.

That  said, I think it's been a great experience. When I get down on myself  and my capabilities, I remember that there are people that like the  stuff that comes out of my brain enough to support this patreon and that  helps give me confidence. The extra income, though it won't pay my rent  or anything, makes me feel a bit more secure and makes it easier for me  to spend time on things that won't immediately pay, like the art I've  put on Redbubble, or the photoshop and budgeting classes I've taken.  It's given me money to join The Bullish Society, which is teaching me a  LOT about how to make a more sustainable income and how to stand up for  myself.

It's difficult to say how hard it is  to get patrons. I spent a long time thinking up my patron rewards but  I'm not sure how much that effected people's decisions to contribute. I  got most of my patrons on the first day, but a lot of those patrons were  friends and fans I'd been forming relationships with for years. Out of  2,425 facebook friends, I manage to have 21 patrons, so I wouldn't say  that it's easy. But I definitely think it is worth it.
For  anyone thinking of doing it themselves, I'd say that you have to  emotionally be in a place where you can ask, but genuinely feel ok if  people say no (or, more often, nothing at all) Any pledge you get is a  surprise and a blessing.

Did you have jet lag in Prague?
Kind  of. I had a late flight and slept poorly (because, Airplane) but the  upside of my bags being delayed and me not having a coat in the freezing  weather is that I wanted to spend the least amount of time outside. So I  let myself sleep, get up, shower, eat, and then sleep again. Since my  sleep cycle was so fucked up, I went onto Prague time pretty easily  after that.