Unbound Soul Side Story: Camus' Struggles (Patreon)

"Mum, dad, I have an announcement!"

I carefully put down my book and looked up at my little bundle of hyperactivity as she came rushing in through our front door, having spent the day doing who knows what. I still wasn't used to her pitch-black hair, darker even than my own, nor her piercing violet eyes, but at least I knew with certainty that her personality hadn't changed. This time. Who knew what would happen the next time? I still wished with most of my heart that I could separate her from Peter. To make her see how dangerous he was.

"Peter said yes! We're officially dating!"

And she was so excited about that fact... The small remaining part of my heart—the part that accepted the remonstration of my mate that sometimes happiness needed to take precedence over stability and safety—let my mouth curl up at the edges, despite the rest of me screaming about how badly this was going to go wrong.

Clana had no such reservations. "Oh my! So soon! I wasn't expecting him to make a move until the end of the two years he gave himself. I haven't made any preparations! Thank goodness there's still time. Oh, but I'm getting ahead of myself. Are you planning to take part in the beastkin ceremony, or do you want a human wedding? Or maybe a mix, or both?"

Cluma shifted awkwardly, and I felt my mouth flatten back out. "And what haven't you told us?" I asked.

"Umm... He said he may not be ready to join me this mating season."

'Then what's the point?!' was something that—with great effort and the aid of my [Clarity] skill—I didn't snap out. "Then, if you don't mind me asking, what exactly has changed?" I asked, phrasing my thoughts more politely. "You already spend most of your time together as it is."

"Umm..." she repeated. "Nothing?"

I smiled again, but this time for a different reason. I loved my child, and I wouldn't change her for anything, but she didn't half get overexcited about things for no reason. Nothing had changed other than the exchange of a few words, and yet that made her so happy. I found her mindset hard to understand, but I was hopeful I could learn.

"Well, perhaps I'll get a few things ready, just in case they're needed. It wouldn't do to be caught unprepared, after all, and if I get meat in and we don't use it, it just means we have some posh stew for a few days. I wonder if Vargalas would cook me up some potions of potence? Given what a rank three version did to David, I'd bet a rank four concoction would come with a serious risk of flooding if used in an enclosed bedroom."

"Potions of potence?" asked Cluma looking confused, while I suffered a sudden coughing fit.

"Human males have no staying power whatsoever, dear. One shot, and they're out for hours. Peter's going to need serious help to keep up with you."

"Mum?!" exclaimed Cluma, blushing furiously. "And you, dad! Stop sniggering!"

Sniggering? Me? I touched my mouth and found that I was indeed wearing a rather crude grin. Oh, please don't tell me I'm starting to absorb Clana's sense of humour after all this time. I'm not sure I could take that.

"You might brush it away, but it's an important topic," continued Clana, more seriously. "Obviously, I of all people have no objection to you pursuing a human as your mate, but you do need to remember that it complicates matters, particularly given the... uniqueness of your choice."

"I know! You've never let me forget you once tried to take his dad as your mate for even a second."

"I know you know, as an abstract concept, but what have you actually done about it? Have you talked to him about children? Or what he intends to do about his sexual desires for the bulk of the year when you aren't in heat? Humans don't just switch off like we do."

"He knows what he's getting into. He's never expressed any sort of desire for children."

"Has he ever expressed a desire not to have them?"

"...No."

"You need to communicate. The worst possible thing that can happen is for you both to make assumptions, and to not notice they're wrong until it's too late."

Really? In some respects, Clana lacked an imagination. I could think of plenty of worse things. For their relationship, and maybe even friendship, to break down due to a lack of communication was one of the better outcomes I could think of.

But again, that was the smothering, overprotective failure of a father talking. The one who sucked so badly at life that my own mate had to take our child and flee from me to protect her, even at the cost of spending the following years as a debt slave.

"You do need to talk," I agreed. "Make sure you each understand what you're getting into, and the expectations you have of each other. And please don't get too upset if it falls through," I added, with a glance at Clana.

"Aww. I was excited, but now you're both ganging up and being serious at me. Spoilsports!"

Cluma was giggling, making it obvious she wasn't really upset. Apparently, I was still on the side of 'constructive advice' rather than 'smothering' for now. Good.

"Mum. You've never told me the full story of you and David. What actually happened back before you met dad?"

"Nothing interesting," she answered dismissively.

"Oh? Not even the bit where you tried to convince him to start a harem?" I prodded. It still rankled a little that I'd been her second choice. On bad days, I wasn't sure it was even that, and that she'd only taken me in as a charity case.

...Come to think of it, there hadn't been a day that bad in a long while.

"Mum did what?!" exclaimed Cluma, taking the bait magnificently.

"I... Don't say things that are so misleading!" stammered my mate. "Fine. It really isn't very interesting, though. As you know, my home village is a way south-east of where you were born. There were no single beastkin boys there, and even if there had been, at the point I came of age, I was far more interested in cooking than worrying about the next mating season. My parents always used to try to push me to different villages each year, but I'd just ignore them. But of course, in a tiny village, levelling my cooking skills was almost impossible. By the time my twentieth birthday was coming up, I hadn't even maxed out [Advanced Cooking], and was getting frustrated. When I heard that the tavern in your birth village was looking for a new cook, I took it up like a shot."

"And then David came in for a meal, and you fell in love at first sight?"

"Heck no. He was a complete weirdo. He'd praise my cooking, then ask if he could 'reward' me for it by fluffing my ears."

I failed to hold in a snort of laughter. Despite having heard the story before, the thought of David behaving like that was hilarious. Cluma, meanwhile, was looking on in complete disbelief. "What? There's no way David would do something like that."

"Remember, me and your father are older than David and Lucy. I may have been nearly twenty, but he was still a fresh adult, barely come of age. And, of course, it was before he had met Lucy. He may be fiercely loyal to her now, but that wasn't the case back then. I soon discovered he had a reputation for hitting on everyone, regardless of race. On one occasion, even regardless of gender, although to be fair, his target was a little androgynous."

Cluma blinked a few times as her internal picture of David took some heavy modifications.

"My twentieth birthday came and went, and we were soon into the tail end of spring. Mating season was coming up again, but I didn't think anything of it. Yes, there were single beastkin in the village at that point, but they were all five years younger than me. I intended to ignore it, and work through it like normal. And then, on the first day, David was there in the tavern again, looking surprised to see me. I can still remember his exact words. 'Huh? What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be home having fun?'"

"Wow. Blunt."

"I smacked him over the head and served him a smaller portion than usual, and guess what he said?"

"Did he apologise?"

"Hah. The complete opposite! He said, 'Wow, if you're that self-conscious about it, I'll happily sleep with you.' Him, six years younger than me, and a complete creep!"

"So you whacked him again?"

"Of course I did! And then I dragged him home anyway, because I was in heat and I wasn't going to let a willing male off the hook after making an offer like that. It wasn't as if I disliked him or his flirting. And that's when I discovered just how awful humans were at..."

"Okay, that's enough," I interjected. "What happened in your hut back then can stay there."

"Spoilsport," giggled Clana. "Suffice it to say, I had to send a very embarrassed David over to Henry to special order some potions, but he managed it in the end, the poor lad. And after that... he kinda grew on me. He did legitimately love my cooking, even if he had an odd way of showing it, and he was always kind and helpful to everyone. I figured, if I was going to take anyone as a mate, that was the sort of person I wanted. And so I tried, only to be shot down instantly. 'Sorry, but I want to raise a family,' he told me. I'd never wanted children, but it wasn't as if I was against the idea, so I suggested adoption, but at that point there were no orphans anywhere in Dawnhold. I went as far as lodging a request with Lord Reid to be notified if any children were in need of a home, but nothing came of it in time."

"Aww," said Cluma, looking downcast.

"Well, it was what it was. And that was the point at which Lucy entered the picture. She lived in one of the northern villages, and her parents brought her to ours, looking for someone to hook her up with. She met David, they got on well, and a couple of years later, they got married. Meanwhile, I spent my next mating season alone again. Even when I invited David to join me, he turned me down. He said it would be a betrayal of Lucy, even though they'd only just met by then, and certainly weren't engaged. It was like someone had flipped a switch in his head. All the flirting that he'd previously released indiscriminatingly was reserved for her. I have to admit, I was a little envious. But you know the rest. Camus came to our village to get away from the town, he was my age and single, and when the next mating season came around, we couldn't help ourselves."

"Hang on. You completely missed out the bit about a harem!"

"That was just your father exaggerating, dear. All that happened was that when David got engaged to Lucy, I asked him if he would take me as a second wife. He very politely declined."

"And then Lucy's father chased you down the street," I added.

"And then Lucy's father chased me down the street," she agreed, sighing wistfully. "Fun times."

Story over, Cluma grinned as she hugged us both, then ran off to her bedroom. Come to think of it, she really had taken the announcement seriously, to give it prior to hugs.

And to think I was once convinced she would grow out of hugging everyone and everything she saw. I was wrong about far too many things.

"You aren't convinced about this, are you?" observed my mate, having easily seen through my paper-thin smiles.

"I am not... But... I hope that I'm wrong."

"One small improvement at a time," muttered Clana, shaking her head.

--------------------------------------

A few days later, the scene repeated. Or at least, the opening did.

"Mum, dad, I have an announcement!"

I dropped my book, which clipped the edge of the table, bouncing off and hitting me hard in the shin. It was the sort of slip that would normally send the mirthful mate of mine into hysterics, but she was currently preoccupied after dropping a bowl on her foot and splattering the floor with stew.

"How?" she asked, as if the answer wasn't obvious. That damn Peter had done something again.

"How what? What's wrong?" asked my naïve daughter, before gasping in realisation. "Wait, do I smell like I've taken a mate?"

The pair of us nodded in silence. That shouldn't be possible. Taking a mate was something that happens in, well, mating season. The clue was in the name!

"Oh! That's amazing!"

"Can you explain what happened?" I asked, pinching my nose as an incipient headache threatened to bloom into a full migraine. "This is... significant."

"Mmm! Like I said—amazing! Anyway, we were in the dungeon and I needed to use my sense of smell, so I disabled my odour suppression, and then I could smell Peter, and he was mine! I guess I might have accidentally reciprocated."

"That's... that's not how it works," I said, pinching harder.

"Between the [Xenophilia] trait and the way humans are effectively in heat all the time, I suppose it's at least possible," tried Clana, but from her tone she was obviously clutching at straws, not really believing her own words.

"It's really not," I sighed. "Taking a mate is a physical act. You can't just decide it. You need to take a part of each other into yourselves."

"Oh, right. We do that all the time."

Clana stumbled, tripped over her dropped bowl, and fell bum-first into the puddle of stew. I winced as her tail got caught beneath her and bent at an unnatural angle, but my concern for my mate was far outweighed by my anger.

"What did Peter do to you?"

Cluma squinted in confusion before realisation dawned. "Dad! And you, mum! What are you thinking! I was talking about his mana! Mana! That's how he teleports me, remember! His mana running through my body!"

Phew, for a moment there, I thought... I don't know what I thought. But maybe there was something there. After her accident, she said her body was partially composed of mana, as if she were some sort of half-demon. Or half-monster. Demons were as close to a monster as any member of the surface races could get, to the extent they spawned in mana fields rather than being born conventionally.

"Okay. I suppose that's... plausible. But you realise everyone is going to think you're..." how did I even end that sentence? Mates? There was no 'think' about it! Biologically, they already were.

"Hehe," giggled Cluma, who didn't consider that a downside.

"This is serious!"

"I know. But for it to happen, we had to both want it, didn't we? And if I want to hide it, I just keep my odour suppression on. What's the problem?"

"I suppose... but..." Again, I felt like the fact there was a problem was obvious, but I failed to articulate what, exactly, that problem was.

"Look at it this way," said Clana, inspecting the mess she'd made on the floor while massaging her bruised tail. "However it happened, it means that Peter is serious about spending his life with Cluma. He's not stringing her along, or one of the more shameless sort of [Xenophilia] holders that hits on anyone with fluffy ears. He's completely committed himself to our daughter, and no-one else."

I supposed that was true and certainly counted in his favour. It wasn't as if he'd ever deliberately hurt Cluma. He had always tried to be a good friend. He was just a bit... careless. And, if I was honest, unlucky. He made her happy. I could give him a chance.

"Okay. I agree it's... not a bad thing. But I suggest you keep your odour suppression active if you don't want to spend the next season explaining yourself. Then we can hold the ceremony after mating season like usual."

"Mmmk," agreed Cluma, before running to her room.

"Your smile looks a bit more genuine now," commented my mate.

"Do you think so? First her description of the beach, and now this; even I can tell Peter is serious about making her happy."

"Indeed. Best I get those potions from Vargalas after all," said Clana, grinning.

"Mum!" yelled Cluma, her hearing as impeccable as ever.

--------------------------------------

My optimism kept up for a full two weeks before Peter went and spoilt it. Our front door slammed open, then closed itself again with no visible external intervention.

"Cluma? What are you doing back so early?"

"Because Peter is a big grumpy-bum. Is mum at work?"

"Yes. What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Just tell her we won't be involved in the mating ceremony this year."

"What happened?" I asked, frowning. She still had her odour suppression active, so I couldn't tell anything from her scent, but Peter would surely not have abandoned her.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Can you at least turn off your [Stealth] for a moment?"

She did, revealing a very unhappy face and... "Is that a new style of armour?" I asked in confusion. It looked easy to move in, but it wasn't thick enough. Not to mention it had decorative holes in. Surely it wouldn't offer sufficient protection? No way was it supposed to be armour, but it didn't look practical as clothing either. It required an enchantment just to wear!

"No. I was just trying to do something nice for Peter, but it kinda backfired."

Something nice? As much as I wanted to question that, the 'backfire' took precedence. "And what, he dumped you?"

"What? No! Nothing like that! It's just... There are some topics where you can't stop him talking, but others where you can't get him to start. Plans for our future are one of them. Apparently, when he said he 'couldn't guarantee' joining me this mating season, what he meant was I'm too young for him, and there's no way he could have sex with me, and probably can't next year either."

"Huh? But you're already... umm..."

"Mates? Just because we smell like it doesn't mean that we are."

Yes, it did. That was how it worked! Except for Peter, because he has to keep being so bloody complicated.

"Wait, so he expects you to spend mating season alone, even though you're... half-mated?"

"Yup. Oh well, at least I won't be stuck in my bedroom, thanks to this earring."

"What are you talking about?! You have a mate! Don't you have any idea how unpleasant it is to be separated from your mate during mating season?"

"Huh? That doesn't count. It can't do; I've not even had my first mating season yet."

"Your body disagrees."

Cluma squinted in confusion. "But he's human. And... that's not possible."

"That's what we said two weeks ago! Didn't you spend two seconds thinking through the implications?"

Cluma's eyes opened wide as she finally took two seconds to think about it. "But... what am I supposed to do then? I can't force him. I'll just have to put up with it."

"Like heck you will. There's no way I'm going to let you go through that."

"What other option is there? You can't force him either."

"Break up. Sever the connection you share as mates. Wait however many years he needs, then try again."

Cluma's mild fear switched to an intense anger as she stared at me with an expression of pure betrayal. I thought I'd been good there; I'd specifically said to try again later, rather than look for someone more sensible, but she was still taking it badly. Yes, you don't do that—even Clana didn't go that far when she took Cluma away from me—but this situation was different.

"I know what you're thinking, but it was a mistake in the first place. An accident. He obviously wasn't ready, and it was only some quirk of your respective biologies that let it. You can pretend it didn't happen. No-one will think any less of you."

"I know it happened. I can't believe you even suggested that!"

My daughter vanished once more before the front door slammed itself.

I sighed. Was I in the wrong there? I'd tried to be happy for their relationship. I'd not complained about it, even though I suspected it would go wrong. And it had. Hadn't we told her communication was important? But she hadn't followed through, and from the sound of things, Peter was even worse.

Then we'd just need another intervention.

I walked to Peter's new house, but he'd left by the time I arrived. Perhaps that was a good thing. It wouldn't do any good for me to confront him without having a chance to think things through properly. To talk to Clana, too, and get her opinion. I was aware my judgement was often... biased.

I simply left a note and returned home to wait for Clana to finish her work.

"Oh? What's got you so broody?" she asked, picking up on my mood the moment she stepped in.

"I'll give you one guess."

"Okay, let me ask a different question. What has Peter done this time?"

"One thing that neither him nor Cluma did, despite both of us telling her to and then them spending practically every waking hour together since, was talk. Now it turns out that Peter has no intention of spending mating season with Cluma, or joining in the mating ceremony after."

"What? But he... No, it was only three days earlier that he said he wasn't sure. But I assumed... No, again, Cluma had her odour suppression on. She only turned it off when they entered the dungeon. That was the first time since then that she would have picked up on his scent..."

"What are you muttering about?"

"Apparently, we're as guilty at making assumptions as that pair of troublemakers. Fine. A strong enough potion of contraception will prevent Cluma going into heat, and they can try again next year."

I frowned, and not only because I saw no reason to expect next year to go any differently. A strong potion of contraception could block beastkin from going into heat? I'd never heard that before! How strong did it need to be? Had Clana been drinking them the entire time we were separated, leaving me to suffer on my own?

"Since the entire half-mating thing was an accident, wouldn't it be better to reverse it and let them redo it properly once they're ready?" I asked, not wanting to poke the hornet's nest of the other subject.

"That would... not be right. I suppose, if there was no other option. Or if Peter intends to decline next year's mating season too."

"What difference does next year make?"

"Using the potion in that way increases the intensity of the next mating season, to the extent that even a rank four potion wouldn't be able to block it."

So she hadn't been using them, then. I wasn't sure if I should feel happy that she didn't put me through anything she wasn't going through herself, or unhappy that I forced my mate to suffer...

"Then no way are we doing that. Not unless we're absolutely certain that Peter isn't going to leave her hanging next year."

My mate peered at me appraisingly, before sprouting a grin that sent chills through my body, my tail curling up around myself protectively. "Yes. I agree. However wrong your suggestion feels, if we have no choice, then we have no choice. So we'd better confirm the state of things beforehand. Since neither Peter nor Cluma seem to want to talk to each other, why don't we take matters into our own hands? What say we give Peter a little... test."

Resisting the urge to shudder as I stared into those eyes, I appreciated for the first time that I wasn't the only one trying to change and compromise. Sometimes, our daughter really did need protection, and on those occasions when Clana agreed, woe betide those who stood against her. Nevertheless, this time, for the sake of my daughter's continued happiness, I hoped that Peter would pass.