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After breaking my personal best speed record for teleporting—earning both a skill and class level in the process, and hence raising my opinion of snakes by a good few notches—I made my way to the bar to pick up Cluma. Our village had ramped up production of spirits over the past season, and while they weren't exactly widespread, the guild was buying up whatever it could. As a result, the bar had grown even louder recently.

They still tasted like crap, of course. Hopefully, in a year or two, we might have something that was actually pleasant to drink, rather than merely a means to an end. At least now we had a few different varieties of crap, so you could pick, if not the best, then at least the least worst.

There was, however, another downside to the new high potency alcohol supply that had never even crossed my mind.

"Peter!" came the disembodied and slightly slurred voice of Cluma. "You never told me you were the one who made the new drinks!"

A burst of darkness affinity blinded my [Mana Sight], despite my active scanning. The actual quantity of mana involved wasn't high, but it was structured perfectly for masking the room, and was stable enough that my [Expert Mana Control] couldn't immediately tear it apart. It was obviously a rank two spell specialised for blinding mana sensing abilities.

There was only one reason why she would cast that spell, so I cast [Endurance] and braced, being impacted moments later by an inebriated catgirl employing the full force of her enchanted ring, [Acrobatics] trait and enhanced stats.

Much to my pride, I managed to remain standing.

"I didn't—I just gave our villagers the idea. Anyway, I was only gone for ten minutes! How much did you drink in that time?! No, better question: since when do you drink alcohol?"

Could you even absorb it that quickly? Shouldn't it still be in her stomach, not her bloodstream?

Not that her behaviour was massively different from usual; alcohol tended to loosen inhibitions, but it wasn't as if Cluma was particularly inhibited to begin with. Normally she'd hold back her pounce a little, so as to not hurt her target or risk injury to herself if they dodged. There was also the way she was forcibly nuzzling her head into my chest, and wasn't detaching even when I employed the tried and tested method of head pats.

"It was something you were responsible for, so of course I had to try some!" she proclaimed.

"Some?" snorted a nearby delver. "She calls three mugs 'some'?"

"I had to try one of each!"

I did a bit of mental maths, based on her endurance stat and body weight, then gave her a cast of [Endurance] too.

"Hehe," she giggled, popping into visibility, her face flushed red. "Let me hug everyone goodbye, and then we can get going!"

She ran off, somersaulting over delvers and bouncing off tables, her coordination not at all impacted. Or perhaps those casual acrobatics were far enough below her limit that any impact made no difference. I glared around the room, betting that someone here was responsible for encouraging her. I couldn't even take her home. Or maybe I should use it as an excuse to intrude, and try to eavesdrop?

Nah, I'd take her to Serpent Isle as planned. But not to the dungeon, as interesting as a tipsy Cluma in the dungeon would be. Where exactly was the dungeon positioned on the island? Could we [Weft Walk] to a beach? There was something appealing about the thought of a beach untouched by civilization.

"Ready!" she exclaimed, dropping behind me and wrapping her arms and legs around me in a piggyback. That was more than enough contact for [Item Box], so I sent her to Serpent Isle, then teleported myself before she could do any damage.

"Wow, it's even smaller than our village," she said, looking around. "Is that the dungeon?"

Before I could answer, she went running off in the direction of the portal. I gave chase; I trusted her not to jump in, but she'd probably drive the poor guard insane. At least she was visible this time.

"Hey! Who are you?" he called.

"I'm Cluma!" she answered, not seeing the problem.

"What are you doing here? This isn't the place for playing around. Are you even a delver?"

Cluma turned from where she was waving her hand through the portal, pouted at him, then vanished.

"Please don't pounce on the guard!" I yelled, having finally caught up, and spotting that she'd cast her blinding spell once more.

An impact knocked me clean off my feet, slamming me back first into the grass.

"Ha! Got you at last!"

I sighed as Cluma popped back into visibility, lying on top of me with her arms still wrapped around my chest, once again nuzzling happily. Wasn't rubbing their face against things how cats marked their property? Scent glands in their cheeks? Was she trying to register her ownership of me or something?

"Sorry about this," I said to the dumbfounded guard. "Some troublemakers thought it would be a good idea to give her alcohol. I'm Peter, and this is Cluma. We've just moved to this dungeon from Dawnhold."

"I'm David. Nice to meet you. I think."

"Huh?" said Cluma, looking up at the guard. "That's too confusing. He's going to need a nickname."

David, Human, Warrior, (16/36)

"More than one person is allowed to have the same name," I pointed out. "Please don't start giving everyone nicknames."

"Nope. From now on, he's Mr Guard!"

"That's... You know what, forget it. Do you want to come on a jog with me to explore the island?"

"Yup!" she answered, bouncing up.

"Oof," I went, because she'd bounced on my stomach.

Since we were already talking to the guard, for a slightly lax definition of talking, I might as well ask for directions. "How far are we from the sea? And are there any sandy beaches?"

"We're near the west coast, and yes, there are beaches. That way, about an hour's walk. But be careful not to get lost. There are no obvious geographical features around here, so it's easy to walk in circles."

"Thanks."

Getting lost wasn't a concern, given that I could teleport back. Even if I couldn't, [Clock] would let me find my way. I could explore with impunity.

I climbed to my feet and set off, only to almost immediately hit a snag; Cluma wasn't capable of jogging with [Weft Walk]. Apparently, she had lost some amount of coordination after all. Even so, an hour's walk wasn't far, so we could jog it without the aid of magic. It would give Cluma time to recover.

David was correct about there being no geographical features. The entire island was basically just a giant meadow. There was an occasional copse of trees or patch of scrubland, but for the most part, it was flat and nothing grew taller than my ankles. I didn't see any wildlife other than more snakes, so what was holding back the plant growth, I had no idea. Then again, I also didn't see anything that could have been prey for the snakes. Perhaps they were herbivorous?

We reached the beach half an hour later, a stretch of sand running as far as I could see in both directions, the sea sparkling in front of us and the mainland just about visible in the distance across it to the south-west. Neither of us had ever visited a beach in this world before. I had back on Earth, of course, so I was at least familiar with the concept, but for Cluma the experience was completely new.

"Wow, the ground is like powder!" she exclaimed, picking up a handful of sand and letting it fall back out through her fingers. "And how is there so much water? How long did it need to rain to fill up the sea?"

"Millions of years?" I tried, not really having much idea how planetary formation worked. Assuming it even worked the same way in this universe, magic being as unphysical as it was. Maybe there was a giant water crystal at the bottom of the ocean somewhere.

"Woah. That's a really long time."

Cluma ran to the sea and started splashing in it. The beach was on a gentle slope, so the sea remained shallow for quite a distance. It was also crystal clear. Could I teach Cluma to swim?

No, who was I kidding. Given what her [Acrobatic] trait let her do in mid-air, even before the trait had fully formed, she'd have no trouble at all in the water. She could probably teach me.

"Want to try swimming?" I asked.

"In the sea? Sure, why not?"

"Just keep [Danger Sense] and [Threat Perception] active. I don't know what wildlife there is around here."

Cluma stripped herself naked, throwing her clothes onto the sand, then paddled out a few metres into the sea, the water still not far above her ankles.

"It's freezing!" she exclaimed.

"Water takes longer to heat up or cool down than air," I explained. "Even if it's spring now, the water is still cold from winter."

Luckily, we both had our high-level ice resistance rings. Neoprene was something I didn't have a clue how to make, so it wasn't as if I was going to be inventing traditional wetsuits. Although, there would almost certainly be a local equivalent. Some sort of outfit made from water affinity monster skin? With a warmth enchantment, if such a thing existed? Probably not, or mum would have been using temperature control enchantments on our clothes, alongside the comfort and durability.

Maybe something with an ice resistance enchantment was the local equivalent.

I took off my shoes and followed Cluma into the sea, walking out until the water was around my waist, before trying to remember how to swim. It had been well over a decade, and the saying about riding a bicycle didn't take into account the additional impact of switching to a completely new, magically enhanced body.

Cluma, as expected, took only a few minutes before she was gliding around in the water like a dolphin.

"You didn't take your clothes off!" she called. "Now they're all wet."

"I have spares," I answered. "And you threw yours onto the sand. That's going to be really unpleasant when you put them back on."

"Huh? Why?"

"Sand gets everywhere."

I supposed her dress and sandals weren't the worst things to get sand in, and the comfort enchantment on her dress would likely help. Socks were the worst, but she hadn't been wearing any. Her underwear was liable to cause regret, though.

My gran, back on Earth, always insisted on eating sandwiches on the beach. I had no idea why; it mattered not one iota how careful everyone was, they would always get sand in them, and eating sandy sandwiches was a terrible experience. No number of layers of cling film would save them. The mere fact that sandwiches were present on a sandy beach seemed to cause the sand to appear within.

Maybe Earth did have magic after all?

Thankfully, I did get the hang of my old breaststroke before too long, so Cluma didn't show me up too badly.

"That was fun!" she exclaimed, walking back onto the beach. "Eep, the sand is sticking to me!"

I may not have had any sort of swimming costumes available, but I did at least have towels in my [Item Box] supplies. "Here," I said, tossing one to Cluma, and pulling out another for myself. "It's only sticking because you're wet."

I dried myself and changed my clothes while she tried to put on her old set, immediately starting to shuffle uncomfortably.

"There's sand in my panties! It's all scratchy!" she complained.

"I warned you," I laughed. Unlike my clothing, her dress, one of the ones mum had given her for her birthday, was the only item that was enchanted. Her underwear had no self cleaning functionality.

She ended up taking them off, preferring to go commando. Clana would likely complain about that sort of unladylike behaviour, but with the sea acting as a barrier between us and her, I deemed us safe.

Between the journey here and the time spent playing, the sun was starting to set. The view of it dipping towards the sea was spectacular, and I sat on the beach to watch. Cluma sat next to me, laying her head in my lap. She seemed to have recovered from Remous' brew, thankfully, even if it did seem a bit quick. The Earth guideline of one unit per Earth hour probably didn't apply here, where the endurance stat was having an unknown effect.

Or perhaps there was some lingering effect. Cluma started purring quietly, her telltale sign of having fallen asleep. So cute! But now what? We were on a beach, miles from any sort of civilization, and teleporting her would certainly wake her. Should I let her sleep? I had camping supplies in my [Item Box], and the weather was good for the time of year, despite it still being very early in spring.

No, we hadn't told her parents we'd be sleeping out. Not coming home would worry them... But sunset was early this close to winter, and we had time before they'd expect her back. I could leave her for a while.

I pulled a blanket out of [Item Box], tossed it over us, and laid back myself, watching the sun sink slowly below the horizon.

Comments

Akaeye

Peters great but he always feel like a stick in the mud compared to Cluma, which is strange because he’s all sorts of crazy, He’s a guy that made a baby into a magical pyromaniac, how is the hugger the one that feel out of control Think they are both great btw, just an observation

cathfach

Cluma's at home in any social situation and doesn't care what anyone thinks of her, while Peter is generally awkward and self-concious. Meanwhile, Peter is at home chopping his own limbs off for science, while Cluma has a modicum of self-preservation. Both out of control, but in different ways. :)

Akaeye

It’s always so strange how few people comment here