Samus: Boobytrap - Variants (Patreon)

"This is the LAST time I work some technological backwater planet like Earth! I follow the Oozian who skipped his bail here, get all my gear confiscated by some customs official, and the skeezy merchant who rented me this 'skoobah' gear totally ripped me off!

"This stuff doesn't have any scanners, let alone weapons! So when one of the Oozian's traps snatched me, it all went to crap.

"Yeah, when I get out of this, I'm totally entering Earth on 'avoid at all costs' list.

"Stupid planet."

-From the Journals of Samus Aran

Featuring a sneak peek at next week's series, starring Lara Croft!