Gif: THE MIDAS TOUCH (Patreon)

"You only get one wish," the genie said. "So think carefully and - "

"I already know what I want," Clyde interrupted. "Give me the Midas touch with sexy blonde girls!"

The genie sighed.

"You sure about that wish, pal? I mean, the 'Midas touch'? Do you even know the story of King Midas?"

Clyde folded his arms. He wasn't exactly sure who King Midas was, but he knew the Midas touch meant you were really lucky and he didn't like being talked down to like this by some snotty chick in harem pants.

"That's what I want," Clyde said. "Give me the Midas touch with hot blonde babes with big boobs! Grant my wish, just like that!"

After the genie had vanished in a puff of sparkly blue smoke Clyde hurried over to the local supermarket, eager to try out his new abilities on a cute little produce clerk he'd had his eye on for a while. But when he asked for the clerk's number she just sneered, called him an old creeper and told him to get lost. He couldn't understand it. Where was his Midas touch?

Since Clyde was at the market already he decided to pick up a few cantaloupes. He got a produce bag and was reaching for the ripe melons when his hand brushed the chest of the guy standing next to him...

POOF! Clyde suddenly felt something soft and squishy in his palm, and when he turned he saw that the guy next to him had somehow transformed into a sexy blonde with boobs that were almost as big and round as the cantaloupes.

Clyde froze in shock, standing there stupidly with his hand on the blonde's bosom. She gave him a hard slap on the cheek, snapping him out of his trance, and as he stumbled back he collided with a fat guy in a garish Hawaiian shirt covered with parrots. POOF! The Hawaiian shirt guy suddenly became a hot blonde chick too, with boobs even bigger and rounder than the first guy's! A crowd was gathering now and Clyde hurried out of the store before anybody could figure out that he was the one responsible for this sudden outbreak of sex-changes in the supermarket.

As he drove home Clyde felt panicky at first, thinking of his new power as a terrible curse. But then he realized the upsides...

He could ask out a really ugly girl, some absolute hound with snaggle teeth and a mustache, and if he touched her once she'd turn into a blonde with curves like a stripper. Hell, maybe he could even start a business turning homely women into beauties. Soon girls would be lining up for miles to get touched by Clyde!

The whole idea was so exciting that when Clyde came to a stoplight his hand wandered down to his lap. But when he touched himself, he was very surprised by what he found... or, what he didn't find.