Amazon Apocalypse: Chapter 56 (Patreon)

“Sakura, you’re going to burn the cookies!” Bridget protested as Sakura fumbled with a hot tray.

“Bah, Carter won’t notice,” Sakura waved Bridget off.

“I’m right here, you know,” I said as I sampled yet another dish. Bridget had been doing her best to empty her cupboards into my belly. It was getting to be a little much, but apparently, Bridget had picked up Chef as her job. That meant the food was delicious, and making it was helping her rack up job levels. Plus, with my recent upgrade to the D-Grade, I could enjoy it all guilt-free.

Sakura had been trying to play the part of her assistant, but from the looks of things, this was the first time she’d stepped inside a kitchen, no matter how good the apron looked on her.

“I just always thought cooking was a waste of time!” Sakura crossed her arms and glared at the blonde. “Takeout was cheap enough.”

“But not nearly as healthy!” Bridget protested. “Besides, cooking is fun. It’s why I picked it up as my job after the Obelisk quest.”

Their somewhat-peaceful coexistence in the kitchen lasted only a little while. They argued about everything from what food I liked the most to whether my ideal girlfriend was a housewife or a boss babe. But there was no yelling or hair-pulling, which was more than I’d hoped for.

I sighed, content to play my part, enjoying their baked goods, even if some of them were a little burnt. I’d been able to keep myself fed but had never cooked much beyond that. I was just happy to see the two of them talking to one another despite what happened the previous night. That Sakura was just a little mad was a good sign. Seeing the two of them buzzing about, I was thinking that maybe this could work after all.

I knew better than to get between them with my own opinions. That was a surefire way to get both of them mad at me. So instead, I settled in for the long and hard job of eating all the snacks they brought me with my head on a pillow and my arms behind my head. It was relaxing in an odd sort of way.

Laying there being pampered as I was gave me a week’s worth of relaxation in just a few hours. At first, I was using Mind over Flesh to regenerate my wounds, but soon I was back to full health. After that, I set about regenerating mana. With my vast mana pool, that was going to take all day, but the throbbing in my head subsided as soon as I reached the halfway point. It was time to get moving. I could only lay about for so long.

My Death Curse was still active, and away from the settlement as we were, that meant a few critters were crawling back our way. Every hour or so, I took some time off to circle Bridget’s apartment complex and clear them out, netting my lovely companions a few extra levels in the process.

“Don’t you worry, you two, I’ll have you both back up to full strength before you know it,” I promised both of them.

Bridget reached down to the tray containing Sakura’s burnt cookies and stuck one of them in my mouth. “Oh, I don’t know. I think it’s rather cozy in here. If it weren’t for the apocalypse, I don’t think I’d mind being a homemaker for a while. I’ve already packed my things, and I’m ready to go to this farmhouse of yours whenever we’re ready to leave.”

I swallowed the cookie. It was good despite being a little blacker on the edges than a cookie should be. “You talk it over with Sakura? Got everything settled?”

“Yep!” Bridget said.

“No.” Sakura crossed her arms and pouted.

I hugged them both and whispered. “You know, the two of you looked adorable and snuggled beside one another. Talk it over again, and if need be, I’ll mediate. I want everyone living with me to be the best of friends.”

Bridget and Sakura both nodded, eventually giving their promise to be as friendly as they could. I’d seen them getting along, though, and so I knew it was possible. Heck, Sakura seemed to get along with Bridget just fine whenever I wasn’t involved.

The only other option was Bridget leaving us and remaining in the settlement. Somehow, I didn’t see that happening. The way she eyed me was almost predatory from time to time. It was clear she was intent on joining our little circle. And realistically, having her would be a massive boon. With two party mates, I could spread my level draining that much further. It was only logical that we try to make this work, no matter how difficult it was for people from a world of monogamous relationships.

Thanks to fighting the Chaosborn Lycans while they were in my party, the two of them had already regained more than enough levels to handle anything within Crownhill, so I left the two of them to talk things out while I returned to the Obelisk shelter. News had no doubt spread through rumor and those I hired to help me haul back the wolf pups, but I wanted to tell everyone the good news myself.

***

Frank and Marcus also had a victory feast of their own for me. With them, there was a lot less to eat and a lot more to drink. Marcus had found a box of half-eaten crackers in a house somewhere, which was a far cry from the home-baked cake and pastries I’d been eating before. The show’s real star was the case after case of beer the two of them had scavenged.

“This beer was always too expensive for me,” Frank sighed wistfully as he cracked open a sixth can of a brew that definitely looked like it had been on the pricier side. “But according to the Obelisk, I’m a rich man these days. Some of the stuff I picked up ended up being quite valuable.”

Marcus nodded. “Contribution points. More and more people are learning to buy and sell for them. I think that’s what did it for many people and got them to adapt to our new reality. Fighting monsters was too much for them. But getting a job and earning a living? That’s familiar enough that they can pitch in.”

I shrugged. “Seems so. I reckon the status quo will only persist for so long, though. Sooner or later, people are going to figure out that all these people leveling their jobs need raw materials. And once the salvage around the city is stripped clean, they’re going to realize that the easiest way to get more crafting materials is going to be by hunting monsters. Anybody who gets ahead of the leveling curve now is going to be at a powerful advantage.”

Frank grinned. “So it seems. I guess my days of wage slavery are done then?”

I chuckled. “Just don’t let Sakura hear you say that.”

Marcus looked more thoughtful. He ran his hand through his hair, taking my playful words to heart as he nodded along. Whatever hair-brained scheme the kid was coming up with, I was certain he’d succeed at it. He was a hard worker, and he was already well ahead of most in terms of levels. If he started hunting monsters before their raw materials became valuable, he could make himself a very desirable young bachelor.

I took a sip of a beer of my own as the three of us talked about my recent victory. It wasn’t until we were half an hour in that I realized we weren’t celebrating my victory over the Alpha Wolfman and saving Crownhill.

“Nah, Carter, why’d you think that? We’re damn glad you won in the end, but we knew you’d come through for us.” Frank gave me a pat on the back. “We’re celebrating your victory over the limitations of society. Your realization of every man’s dream!”

I furrowed my brows in confusion. “Come again?”

“Bridget and Sakura!” Marcus grinned. He raised his beer in a brotherly salute. Frank touched his beer to Marcus’ and turned it into a toast. “You’ve done what every man dreams of!”

Marcus’ smile stretched from ear to ear, face pink from alcohol despite his levels. “Two girlfriends, Carter. You’ve done the impossible. You’ve got both of them!”

“Seriously? That’s what we’re celebrating?” I stared at the two of them deadpan. “Not… I don’t know… no longer having to worry about getting eaten by giant wolf things and having our souls grafted to them like an extra brain for their feral instincts?”

“Yep.” Marcus smiled.

“That’s the thing.” Frank nodded sagely. “Us feeble mortals can only be with one lady at a time. And bringing them both under the same roof? That takes a man among men. Not to mention a few well-chosen ladies. You’ve done what few men have ever accomplished. I sit here in envy and admiration.”

“Please teach us your ways…” Marcus leaned in close, hanging onto my every word.

I laughed. “Well, I can’t take full credit for it. If not for the pressing need, Sakura would never have agreed. And Bridget seems much more okay with it than I would have expected. There’s still a bit of tension, though, so I don’t know how things will shake out.”

Frank waved his hand. “If they haven’t killed each other by now, things are already looking good.”

Marcus held his beer again, and I clinked my can against it in cheers. “If anyone can do it, it’s you, sir.”

After that, Frank called in the men and women off duty from manning the wall. I recognized Kyle among them, as well as a few others who’d served under me in the Obelisk quest. There were others I’d run into while traveling Crownhill to contact the other survival camps, but most faces were new.

Despite being unfamiliar with most of them, they all recognized me. One and all, they congratulated me on my victory.

Kyle saluted me with both hands. It looked a little silly, but I could tell it was because he was extra eager. Besides, while he may have looked silly now, I didn’t miss the bandages running up his arm. Or the blood spattered across his clothes. Young or not, he’d been among the brave few to stand on the walls against the Lycans. “Congratulations, Sir! A thousandfold congratulations. And a well-earned one at that.”

“Over the Alpha Wolfman, right?” I asked, just to make sure. “You’re all congratulating me on my victory over the Alpha Wolfmen?”

“Uh… sure…” Kyle chuckled awkwardly as he lowered one of his saluting hands and ran the other along the hair at the back of his neck.

I took him at his word, and we returned to drinking. “Here, want a beer, Kyle?”

“Uh... I’m not old enough to drink, sir...” He eyed the drink in my hands.

“You’re eighteen, aren’t you? In most countries, that’s old enough. Besides, it’s not like we’re in the States anymore...” I cast a glance around us at the tattered ruins. “And between you and me, I think the police have bigger problems than you. I say that if you’re old enough to fight for the survival of humanity, you’re old enough to join in the victory celebration!”

Also, I was pretty sure Marcus wasn’t much older than Kyle, and nobody had shown up to stop him from collecting a dozen cases of beer.

“Yes, sir!” Kyle said.

“Cheers.” I passed him a can and clinked mine against it.

The party only grew louder from there, turning from a quiet gathering of friends into a real victory celebration.

A few monsters came in thanks to my presence within the Obelisk, but they were nothing the people on the walls couldn’t handle. In fact, they were switching off so that the newest recruits would get a chance to fight the weaker monsters attracted by my Death Curse. Our recent battle taught everyone that we needed more people at a higher level if we wanted to defend the settlement. Despite the losses we’d taken, more people were wising up to the benefits gaining a few levels could provide, so we actually ended up with more volunteers for the walls than before.

But still, it would only be a matter of time before more powerful things came our way. There were certainly plenty on this shard out there waiting for us.

Soon my little cheers and congratulations with friends spread across the entire area. Word was spreading of my victory and that the Chaosborn Lycans were no more. With them lying dead and the area safe, humanity was no longer in danger. If there ever was a time to celebrate, it was now.

Perhaps it was the ambiance, my leadership bonuses thanks to my titles or just the eight beers I’d drunk one after another, but I had the sudden urge to speak to everyone.

“I’m very flattered by all the attention!” I grinned, stepping around the base of the obelisk. “But this night belongs to all of us. In an era before the Integration, in days that seem so far gone now, most of us were strangers. I know many of those standing here lost brothers and sisters on that day. You have a family either dead or waiting to be found. I can’t bring you back the lost or find your missing kin, but I can welcome everyone here.”

I gestured widely, encompassing those in the crowd. “Look around you. All of us have suffered, but together we have built a new shelter and created new hope. Trust in them and ensure they can trust you. Your new friends and family stand all around you. Tomorrow will be brighter than today, I promise you. And next week will be brighter still. Look to your left and right. Share your names and shake hands with the others here, for each of us are your brothers and sisters now.”

A moment of silence passed over the crowd, and for a moment, I worried my little speech had fallen flat. But I needn’t have worried; for an instant later, thunderous cheers and applause rang through the air.

“Carter! Hell yeah!” Frank clapped. He’d been the first to cheer, and after him, many others did the same.

I gave them another bow, so to not be overwhelmed with cheesy embarrassment, I took another swig from my beer bottle.

The area around the Obelisk was as loud and chaotic as a frat house on the first weekend of college. I was glad to see so many people so excited. For the first time since the Integration began, I saw more smiles than tears.

I was glad to see it and even gladder that I could play such a pivotal role. Early on, when I rescued those first survivors from the supermarket, I worried humanity wouldn’t be fit to survive the Integration. And maybe some still weren’t, but day by day, more and more people were coming to terms with their new reality. And day by day, we grew stronger for it.

As day turned to evening, Bridget and Sakura returned together. The back of my truck was heaped high with Bridget’s things. The two women left my truck together, both with big smiles on their faces.

Bridget grabbed one arm, and Sakura grabbed the other. As one, the two of them planted a kiss on either of my cheeks.

Loud cheering filled the air, once again led by Frank. “You get ‘em, Carter!”

“I hear you’re having a party without us?” Sakura asked, eyebrow raised.

“I heard it had something to do with celebrating the fact that you now have two girlfriends at once?” Bridget poked me in the chest. “Just who are these two girlfriends of yours, huh?”

I chuckled, wrapping an arm around the waists of either woman. “We’re celebrating the defeat of the Lycans, I swear! This was just a little get-together. The rest happened on its own.”

“Likely story…” Sakura shook her head, though she smiled in amusement as she did so. “Still, I’m glad we could make it. Bridget has to buy some supplies before we head to the farmhouse.”

“So… have the two of you settled your differences?” I asked.

Sakura nodded. “I’m stubborn; I know that. But Bridget is right. You can’t just rely on me for stats. Your party has plenty of slots, so there’s no point in focusing your leveling strategy just on me. Spreading your level drain ability a little further will be safer and more efficient. And if that means I must share you with someone… well… I’m just glad that someone is Bridget.”

Bridget smiled at the older woman on my other arm. “Sakura’s just the typical boss. An employee’s ideas are never good. You’ve always got to hire an overpriced consultant to repeat the same thing before her kind realizes it has merit.”

Sakura pouted. “I listened to Carter’s ideas all the time! Like the idea box we kept in the break room.”

“That you never checked…” Bridget chided.

“Alright, you two! Office life is long behind us. Tonight, we celebrate. Everyone deserves to be happy. I’ll break the bad news to them about the ogres before we leave, though. They may be safe for now, but not for good.”

“But that’s a problem for tomorrow,” Bridget said. “Tonight, we party! Quick, pass me that beer; I want to show you two a trick.”

Bridget quickly demonstrated an ability I never would have guessed the formerly shy intern would have possessed. She cracked open a beer on her forehead and downed the entire contents from the can’s open side, beating me and Sakura with seconds to spare.

“This is what they teach in school these days, huh?” Sakura shook her head. “I don’t remember this being a thing when I went.”

“Gotta get with the times, old lady!” Bridget teased. I was surprised to see her acting so playful with Sakura. She really had grown.

“Old lady!” Sakura huffed. “College wasn’t that long ago, girl. I can down a beer with the best of them. Let me see that thing!”

After a few failed attempts, Sakura turned out to be even more adept at chugging down the contents of a drink than Bridget was. Her horn turned out to be surprisingly useful for that since Sakura could skewer the can open on it, making a large enough hole to swallow it all in a few big gulps.

Her face flushed red, and the two women kept at their little competition long enough that I had to bow out, since I knew I’d probably be driving us back to the farmhouse tomorrow.