Paladin 4: Chapter 27 (Patreon)

Asuriel argued they should save the kraken for last, but it was the quest Darren was looking forward to the most. Eventually, she caved and agreed that they could go kill it first thing.

They stood on the edge of an old dock. From its appearance, it had been hundreds of years since it was last used. In the human world, something abandoned so long would have long since been destroyed, but with such long lives, the seraph built their creations to last.

Darren reigned in his aura to avoid alerting the beast. Now that Asuriel was the only seraph around, he didn’t have to fake being one of them anymore. His heart pounded with eager excitement.

The sun overhead painted the sky in shades of orange and pink. The calm waves belied the power of the beast lurking beneath them.

Darren had no shortage of sea monster bait in his Inventory. He pulled out one of Melquart’s ships and let it fall into the water, drifting gently along. It was still filled with the bodies of the demons who’d been on the crew of that ship before Darren attacked them. Their Demonic Aura rich bodies made an excellent lure.

Asuriel touched down at Darren’s side, now wearing the same shiny Protector’s armor she’d worn when they first met.

“Ready?” Darren asked.

Asuriel laughed. “You mean you’re going to let me get a hit in?”

“We’ll see...”

Something sinister snaked through the water underneath the ship. It was a tentacle as thick around as a sturdy tree and with enough strength to uproot one and toss it aside.

Absolute Analysis: Heavenly Beast Analysis

Sea Scouring Kraken (Fifth Order)

• This titan of the waterways of the heavens was created through the lingering fears and fantasies of thousands of dead seafarers long lost to the depths.
• It has high resistance to direct magical effects and possesses impressive endurance and strength. Beware of its powerful water spout, which can strike with force and precision.
• The Sea Scouring kraken’s ink is highly valued for the creation of book-type items and equipment.

The kraken’s suction cups ran along the wood lining the ship, digging deep grooves into it. It had taken the bait.

One moment, its tentacle was crawling up the side of the boat. And in the next moment, that tentacle severed at the waterline. The stump bled inky black goop in all directions while the severed appendage floated along the top of the lake.

The kraken emerged in full then, furious at the sudden attack. It let out a deafening roar that shook the entire lake and the earth around it. But Darren and Asuriel were already in the air.

By the time its eyes broke the surface, Melancholy was hilt-deep in its bulbous, squid-like head. If the creature had been a demon, that blow alone would have been enough to kill it thanks to Darren and Melancholy’s tremendous bonuses against their kind.

But this Kraken was a Divine-aspect beast, and so his blow was only a flesh wound. He would have to do a lot more damage than that to put it down for good.

Asuriel hovered in the air behind Darren, occasionally hurling down a fist-sized sphere of light as she remained prepared to step in as backup. But she left the bulk of the fighting to Darren since he’d been the one so eager to test himself against this beast.

The kraken thrashed wildly, tentacles slamming into the ground and sending waves crashing upon the shore. Each wave moved with supernatural speed and strength, and Darren suspected there was more than a little Divine Aura in that attack.

But he and Asuriel were both already in the air, so they were in no danger. If this was all this fifth-order kraken could do, Darren was going to leave disappointed.

But then it activated another ability. He felt the Divine Aura gathering as it turned its toothy maw skyward.

“Asuriel, move!” Darren warned, and Asuriel quickly darted out of the way.

If she’d been an instant slower, she would have been struck by the giant spout of water that shot from the creature’s mouth with enough power to slice like a blade.

The kraken traced Asuriel’s flight through the air with its attack, and the sweeping beam of water sliced apart trees, branches, and boulders like they were nothing more than wet paper.

But in the kraken’s eagerness to slay Asuriel, it had forgotten about Darren. That was a mistake few beings ever got to make twice.

Darren activated Fists of Peace, and giant golden hands wrapped around the kraken’s tentacles, binding it in the water where it stood. It lost its ability to aim at Asuriel, and it clamped its beak shut to struggle against the grip of Darren’s disabling skill.

That was when Darren struck the final blow. He dove toward the kraken, Melancholy extended point first. The massive blade cleaved the kraken’s mouth and jaw in two.

It tried to attack with that same beam of water once more, but it was too late. The attack was a shadow of its former self, now nothing more than a gurgling geyser. Two more slices of his sword reduced the kraken’s head to chunks of flesh, and when he swept his blade through it two more times, all it could do was twitch, spasm, and die.

“I thought it would have more abilities,” Darren said as he kicked the dead kraken’s beak, hovering in the air just above the water.

“Disappointed?” Asuriel laughed. “I bet it had more abilities. It just didn’t last long enough to use them.”

Darren let out a silent grumble of agreement. He’d gotten a little angry when it went for Asuriel. Threatening those he cared about was the fastest way to die.

Darren collected the dead kraken in his Inventory and put in a little practice with his Soul Smiting ability. He ended up putting the soul into his Hell Sundering Sword of Annihilation, since it could still use every boost he could give it if he were to hope to ever bring it up to par with Melancholy.

After he was done, he and Asuriel were off on their next quest.

***

The rest of the quests were even easier to complete than slaying the giant kraken. Darren had plenty of other bodies, and he could transfer items from his Inventory freely between them. It was a bit odd to peek behind the curtain and realize all the skill books he’d gotten as quest rewards had probably been placed there by a seraph sneaking around on some minor quest. But he was happy to help leave rewards stashed around the Sacred Seas for future quest rewards.

Now that he had a good lay of the land and knew the proper apertures most seraphim used to get between the heavens and the mortal world, he didn’t need the one he’d opened up anymore. He destabilized the pin-prick hole in space and closed it, figuring it would be better to seal it himself than to let another seraph come across the aperture and potentially figure out it had been manually stabilized by someone.

The easiest quest was seizing property from the run-away merchant. Merchants could have all sorts of things in their shops. When Darren and Asuriel kicked down the door and found everything of value missing, he just tossed a few dead demons and items he didn’t need from his Inventory on the ground. They’d just turn in some of Darren’s own stuff for the quest reward. The merchant would get away, not even knowing how lucky he’d gotten.

The most important quest he had to take was the one where he was required to investigate the Order of Heaven’s Grace and their mysterious leader, Darren Heavengrace.

He was uniquely suited to investigate Darren Heavengrace, since he knew himself fairly well. This was definitely not the sort of quest he wanted to leave hanging around in the Protector’s office, where another seraph investigating him might figure out something he didn’t want them to see.

By taking the quest himself, he could pick what impression of him he wanted the seraph to share. So long as he kept things believable, the seraph wouldn’t even know that all their information on him came from Darren himself.

Darren, Ashe, and Asuriel spent the day passing some time in more carnal pursuits, so it didn’t look like they completed their quests faster than should be possible. Ashe was still a little shy, but she was warming up to them, and Darren was thinking he might have another woman on his hands. Though he wouldn’t ask her to make any choices until she had her own body again and wasn’t tied to his sword.

After they were finished, they discussed what kind of impression the heavens should have of the man known as Darren Heavengrace.

“Write in that he has the biggest and bestest cock of any mortal man ever recorded!” Asuriel suggested.

“The most amazing and magnificent,” Ashe suggested, snuggling up against his side. The three of them lay on a grassy outcropping watching the lake they’d killed the kraken in. Darren had gotten dressed again, but the two seraphim lay naked sprawled in his lap with dopy and adoring smiles.

“You sure?” Darren asked. He wasn’t certain if that was the kind of information the Protectors were looking for in their report.

Asuriel gave him a drunken smile with her eyes half-lidded. “Did you go through Protector’s boot camp, or did I?”

Darren shrugged. He had promised Asuriel he’d follow her lead here in the heavens. He wrote down what they suggested, along with a few hundred more observations besides. It wasn’t a complete picture of him, but it filled up the report easily enough. He went into a little detail about his style of rulership, which was largely quite hands off. The heavens should view him favorably if he makes as many sigil wielders as possible. He wrote down a few misinterpretations of his skill as well. No doubt this report would reach Kalaziel’s desk eventually. If Darren could trick his enemies into preparing to fight him with items and abilities meant to counter overwhelming strength and raw power, they would be in for a surprise when his attacks emphasized speed and finesse instead.

***

With their quests completed and enough time passed to make the journey plausible, Ashe returned to Melancholy, and Asuriel and Darren flew back to Calabor.

The Protectors were surprised that Darren and Asuriel were back at all, let alone so soon.

Kilean and his friends were still sitting at the same table, drinking and talking. Seraph were long-lived enough that spending a few days at the same activity wasn’t strange. They didn’t operate on the same timescales as living humans.

“Back already?” Kilean snorted. “Let me guess. You took one look at that kraken and flew back here to return the quest or request backup. If you admit you’re a rookie and need guidance from your wise and experienced partners, maybe me and my companions here will show you how it’s--“

The dead Kraken’s head flopped on the floor, filling half the room.

“We have completed all five quests,” Darren announced. The bored seraph behind the counter looked up from her book at the noise, and for the first time, she set her book aside and looked Darren and Asuriel over with curiosity.

“Impressive. It seems you’re worth those silver badges, after all. We all should have had a little more trust in the captain’s judgment.” She shot a withering glare at Kilean and his companions, who shrank back at her gaze. She was talking about them.

“Hmf. Forgive me if I don’t quite believe it,” Kilean snorted.

“What exactly don’t you believe?” Asuriel crossed her arms and took a step in front of Darren.

“Him! A guy with such sloppy aura control couldn’t have possibly defeated a fifth order kraken. He had you do all the work, girly. I wouldn’t be surprised if he sat back the whole time and watched. The kraken proves you’re worthy of your silver badge, but what about him?” Kilean pointed a finger at Darren.

Asuriel scowled. “Point your finger at him again, and I’ll show you what you can do with it in the sparring ring!”

But Kilean just smiled and snorted at that. “What’s the matter, big guy? Hiding behind your girlfriend again? Are you afraid to face me?”

Inwardly, Darren was grinning. He’d just found a few more volunteers to help him practice.

“Do you think you could beat me?” Darren asked.

Kilean was hesitant for a moment. “Well, you are fifth order. So sloppy aura control or not, it would only be fair if I had a partner. He glanced at his companions, who didn’t seem quite as certain of victory as Kilean was.

“Bring them all,” Darren replied.

“Wait, we don’t actually need to fight, do we? I’m still--“ Darren grabbed two of Kilean’s companions and threw them over his shoulders, hauling them to the sparring ring.

***

By the time Darren won his first victory, neither Kilean nor any of his companions could say Darren was not worthy of his badge. For his second victory, he defeated all six of them at once while they worked together to take him down. For his third victory, he defeated all six of them with both hands behind his back. And for his fourth victory, he didn’t use a single ability.

He drew out the fighting to last several hours, and by the time they were truly underway, a small crowd of Protectors had gathered around the ring to watch the fight.

“Damn, Kilean got his teeth knocked out a second time!” A Protector chuckled.

“First time was to a fist. This time he did it to himself, hitting the ground like that...” Another shook his head in sympathy.

Darren was exceptionally popular with the female Protectors.

“Wow, when did the force get such a stud in the ranks?”

“Doesn’t he look just like that guy on social media who posts all those pictures as he toured the mortal world?”

“You’re right! Maybe they’re related.”

“Mercy!” Kilean held up a hand, crawling through the dirt as he struggled to get to his feet.

Darren frowned. “But what about our fifth round?”

“And you forgot to call Darren sir!” Asuriel added from the sidelines. “You said you’d do that if he beat all six of you at once.”

Kilean sagged where he knelt in the sand of the practice arena. “Mercy... sir. We’re battered and exhausted.”

Darren frowned. “Fine.” He gave Kilean a pat on the shoulder and headed for the door. “We’ll pick this up tomorrow.”

A crowd of Protectors gathered around Darren, congratulating him on several good fights. These people who’d been so dismissive of him mere hours ago now looked up to him like an older brother. Asuriel smiled from ear to ear as she clung to his arm and fended off the approach of a few of the female Protectors interested in getting to know Darren a little better.

“Sir, mind if I ask what quests you’re interested in taking on next?” A female Protector looked up at Darren with dreamy eyes, clinging on to his arm until Asuriel pried her fingers off his arm and replaced them with her own.

“There are a few things I’m investigating. I don’t have a quest for them yet, though...” Darren’s mind turned to the ophanim investigation. Now that he had an official badge and had been welcomed into the ranks of the Protectors, they wouldn’t be able to stop him from looking in on ophanim and investigating.

“You have a lead, but not a quest?” The female Protector tried to squeeze past Asuriel, only to be blocked once more. “But you’re an officer. If you’ve got a lead, just make a quest for yourself! Make multiple quests. That way people like me can help!”

Darren froze where he stood, and an idea he hadn’t even considered before suddenly came to mind.

He could investigate the ophanim and share his discoveries with the Protectors. With him issuing the right quests, he could have the Protectors discover what he was looking for, rather than do it himself.

That would be far more valuable. Darren couldn’t imagine what Kalaziel’s people had done to Whiteguard was legal or justified in their eyes. What if he gave that knowledge to the Protectors?

He scrapped his old plan to investigate the ophanim on his own. Now, he had a far better path forward.

He was going to turn the Protectors against Kalaziel.


<Note>

I've hit that stage when writing a story where you lose all ability to write in your usual writing spot. A lot of authors stop here and call it writers block, but there's a trick. If you just move your computer to a different location you can suddenly write again.

It is the weirdest thing, but I've talked to dozens of writers who've all said the same thing. It works. We don't know how or why, but just changing the physical location where you write usually frees you from the effects of hitting this wall.

If you guys are stuck on something you've been working on for a long time, give it a try.