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What do you like and want to see more of in Amazon Apocalypse? (Patreon)

Published:
2022-05-22 15:38:39
Imported:
2023-02

Content

Quick note about Paladin 3 first:

I have now disabled the tier restrictions on all publically available Paladin 3 chapters (Let's be honest, I kept forgetting to restrict them anyway). Anyone who can read this should be able to read chapters 1-6 and catch up with the story. Releases will pick up soon at 3 per week, then go to 4 once I Publish Spellheart 8 and have more time to focus. After that I will push to accelerate further.


Amazon Apocalypse:



Alright, so I've hit a bit of a stumbling block in Paladin 3 and my brain doesn't really want to write more (don't worry, this happens when I hit 100k words or so in any manuscript. I just have to step away for two weeks and work on something else.) I've decided to use this time get a head start on Amazon Apocalypse.

I've got a series-long story arc worked out, but I'm fiddling with the details now and getting it ready to write. Maybe even getting a few chapters down so the higher tier people have something exclusive for them.

There will be substantial rewrites from the quest version. I might steal sections from the old version, but by and large most of the words will be freshly typed.

I'm going to be changing a lot right now to make the story more planned/coherent. What I need from you guys is to list the things you liked from the quest version and what you want to see more of. Because I would be sad if I accidentally cut your favorite character/story mechanic/ability/item when revising the Quest for novelization. I know it's been a while, but maybe that's for the best. Throw down whatever you remember after the long wait!


If you haven't read the quest version yet, it's all labled under the tag ("Amazon Apocalypse Quest") here on Patreon.

This is your chance to influence the series. After this week, the series outline will be set in stone and immovable (though not the individual book outlines). The most I'll be able to do is tweak and bend things if people want to explore different concepts.

So, just tell me what you liked about the quest version of Amazon Apocalypse so I know not to cut it!

Thanks! Leave your comments below!

Comments

DiabolicalGenius

Well, it was a quest so treating it as an experimental first draft, taking what you liked and what worked from it and writing it new, is probably the best way to write it so I'm all for that. As for my own preferences? To start I'd really like you to keep the prelude mostly as is. Can't cut out the amazons and keep calling it amazon apocalypse. Plus I quite like the setup of a guy who found it was coming, knew that nobody in their right mind would ever believe it and rather than do the normal thing and convince himself it was all a hallucination or crazy prank, bet on his own judgement and committed himself to being prepared. It was interesting and gave a decent reason for the protag to have an advantage rather than just being handed some bullshit cheat or figuring out some exploit in the system all the countless others who used it all missed because he's just sooo smart and they're all just that dumb. Gotten bored of those patterns. Regina is cool. The dynamic switch from high strung and driven female boss, to coming under his lead as the world falls apart was a nice dynamic. Especially as it seemed almost unconscious on her part. Needing to have it all under control when the world was peaceful, then feeling the need to depend on a man when life and death crisis was everywhere. I'd like to see where that goes. Though I don't really mind you tweaking her character a little if you prefer. The system as you're working it has been a bit bare and early days so far as he hasn't gotten a class or any skills to speak of, so I'm not super invested. I did like the whole level cap for humans though, implying that people still human would need to figure out how to go beyond being regular humans to keep getting stronger. Racial evolution or something. I was looking forward to see where that went and what direction Carter would go in with his build. While Regina was going full physical force with non-combat specialisation in alchemy, Carter was still up in the air. Though I was predicting a mage combat specialty and a non-combat speciality in something charisma based. Leadership? Harem building? Something like that? With the level cap, comes the racial switches that would give some people a natural advantage so that even if Carter got a head start in figuring out how to surpass the human cap, he'd still have competition. Plus starting with Regina, gives him a more options in harem members. It might make it easier to recruit too. Women who have been driven out by the panicking humans around them when they turned into "monsters" only to be welcomed with open arms by him? It'd make things go smoother. The rest I'm not bothered if you change. The whole thing where instead of lusting after human women, goblins instead turn them into lycanthropes, put them in bondage and use them as mounts was very original and kind of kinky. Likely to be controversial with any normies and feminists who might hear about it, so I'll understand if you have second thought. Don't see why they'd be reading haremlit sytem apocalypse with likelihood of nsfw content included, in the first place though. Some people just go looking for things to be offended by. Just whatever seems interesting otherwise. Just remember that system apocalypse is among the purest progression fantasy and is all about the lead character levelling up and getting stronger. That's the big draw. As long as you stick to that while balancing it against absurd power creep, you should be fine. That's all I can think of for now. I'm looking forward to it.

Anonymous

I like the Amazons being scouts before a System Integration but the first chapter feels a bit slow. Starting with Regina and the Integration process would be better. The Amazons could be split up as momentary flashbacks or comments throughout the early chapters would help to build his interactions and why Carter is prepared. That said I would enjoy seeing that other System-based groups had done something similar in finding their own champions. Wizards, Dwarven, in order of Knights, etc forewarning specific people who could provide excellent foils or allies later in the series. I think the goblins make good early enemies though I think making some of them former humans, like transforming Craig into a goblin, would be good instead of just making them generic System monsters .

MarvinKnight
>>84366462

Thanks for the input! I will look into doing this in a bit. The idea of having humans converted into goblins (or other enemy races) is pretty intriguing and I think I will actually work that into the series.

Sam Ellis

I remember you were thinking about putting this as part of the Ten Thousand Worlds (spellheart), I would definitely not. Though you might keep have the system having been made by one or more of the world makers (the Baldie Wizard and his fellows who made the Ten Thousand Worlds) if you want to keep the connection. (not needed) And might I recommend for the human tech not working a vartion of what Trey Myr has in his book Phantasmal Party were it is mass production and not the underlaying principles that has issues with the system. you want a modern gun you have to build by hand with hand loaded rounds yes you can use tools but it has to be alot more personal then a factory line. but the idea of using a directed expulsion to lunch an object still works. the idea of a motor still works but the system demands things be unique and mass production is all about being able to make as close to identical as possible. Also how far is the world of Amazon Apocalypse I know they are at least our level but do they have full AI if so how does the system address that?

Anonymous

I'm a fan of how you did the goblins and their turning human women into lycanthropes held as slaves/breeding stock. Its a fresh take on the system, especially the harness not being able to be removed with out the appropriate skill(s).

Anonymous

Now what i like the progression was good, the main protagonist started as just a regular human and i liked the first introduction to the sytem through the amazons. Now the controversial bits like bondage and slaves some girls and boys like this so why not (let the offended read that grey tripe) you will always have alpha species or a more dominant male/female. Why not make 50 percent of the population into the orks goblins trolls cat people's etc those that are bad or socially awkward or misunderstood then you can have are these people evil or was it that before they changed they were evil already ?. Be funny if you have an overly muscled ork wanting to be girly in a pink tutu, now base building and personal growth was spot on guns and ammo food water and shelter should be priorities then waste management and food production, one thing that bugs me on a lot of these books is the system gives amazons magic spaceships but bombs people back to the medieval world why cant we have technomages, rune tanks or a progression to these things later on, why cant he get females not just to make a harem but to boost different things for himself like tough ork skin or speed of a bunny girl or the agility of a cat girl etc.

MarvinKnight
>>84388813

Glad you liked that. I'm keeping aspects of it, but I remember some parts were a bit controversial. So I'm going to try to reframe the same concepts to see if I can make them palatable to everyone.

Anonymous

Hopefully I’m not too late to add on here. My main thing, and I think the only one that hasn’t been mentioned is that I liked that Carter was (as DiabolicalGenius mentioned) shaping up to be a mage/charisma build, and thus (not necessarily physically weak but) noticeably physically weaker than the rest of the main group.