A Devilish Solution (Tentative Title) Chapter 1 (Patreon)

Brenna was thoroughly drenched when she entered Mason Hall, despite covering herself with a thick rain jacket with a hood. She cursed, closing the large wooden door behind her and shutting the outside world with a dull thud. The ancient stone walls of Mason Hall muted the rain and the thunder. She shook herself like a mangy dog and placed her rain jacket on the coat rack near the door…but then thought twice and held onto it.

She technically wasn’t supposed to be here anyway. Anyone from facilities might randomly come by and see her jacket hanging alone on the rack. She couldn’t let anyone know what she was about to do here.

Mason Hall was the oldest building on Dreyfuss University. It harkened back to the 1800’s, modeled after Gothic buildings from Europe. Theological professors had their offices there, in a long dim hallway with somewhat eerie faded photographs of past chairs of the department. She stared down that hallway - the old and worn blue wallpaper from the 1980’s, the creaky wooden floorboards, and the wicker-baskets full of pamphlets. Something about it all unnerved her - the oldness of it. Not a cozy oldness. The creepy oldness.

Brenna turned her head to the large marble stairwell. It snaked around the wall to the second floor that led to the Grand Hall. She huffed at the sight of all the steps - her gurgling stomach reminded her that she had to do this fast. She wasn’t sure how much longer she could hold it in. It would have been a damn waste to let it all out now. Her stomach was practically bursting at the seams of her skirt. She wished she had been smarter and worn sweatpants. Then again, she was so busy she just HAD to meet her adviser earlier today and had no room to stop and change at her dorm because later tonight she had to TA for a chemistry class and–

GGggggRrrrrRBBBbRrrrrr

Brenna winced and started walking up the steps. She more so wobbled like a penguin. She had never been pregnant (and had no inclination to ever have children) but walking up those steps with a belly the size of a bowling ball certainly seemed to be the closest thing.

The only person in the building, her footsteps echoed.

The Grand Hall was dark and the carpet had that fresh “just-vacuumed” scent. Every now and then, lightning would illuminate the windows above. She didn’t think she could make it all the way across, but she clenched her ass cheeks as hard as she could, moaning a little.

The end of the hall had a raised platform for speeches and performance - she went for it.

“Alllright,” she muttered to herself, catching her breath once she reached the platform. Her stomach felt slightly more at ease now that she was getting ready to perform the ritual - only slightly.

From her backpack, she produced the ancient tarnished tome of long-forgotten demonology. More obscure than the most obscure occult texts. This text, one without a name, had been rumored to be hidden deep within Dreyfuss University’s library. It was a musty old book that looked like it was going to fall apart not just because of age but because it was put together by an amateur from the Renaissance. Printing was a fresh thing back then.

Brenna had heard rumors of it since she was a freshman. Along with all the other urban legends about Dreyfuss University, with its long-forgotten monks, nuns, and religious background, she didn’t think much of it. It wasn’t until her recent failures that she started to become desperate. Really desperate. Incredibly desperate. So fucking desperate that it reached levels of demon summoning to help her get through grad school.

And she found it.

The tome was there in the restricted archives at the basement of the library, wedged between a copy of a census from 1856 and a tax record for 1964.

She had it open now in front of her, open to the demon who was said to be the one just for her troubles. A crude drawing of a cackling tall demon with black eyes and a very grotesque penis grinned at her. He had a mangy, thin appearance with black dots for eyes. His specialty was knowledge of "all things chemical, of the wind and the natural laws of the earth". Perfect for trying to help her develop her thesis on organic compounds. Demons always came with warnings though, and they always required something in return.

The book read: “The Decadent One - The basest of alle demons. This creature of utter deprivacioun knoweth no boundes. To sumnene hym, thou moot sette asyde thy dignitee.”

“You got that right,” she muttered to herself.

Brenna went to work with a piece of red chalk drawing the pentagram on the floor as shown in the book. She winced every so often as leaning on all fours made her tummy hurt.

Gotta work fast, she thought.

She arranged five candles, one on each point of the star.

That was about it…really…That was as far as one went to summon this dude.

Except for one more thing.

Brenna laid down on her back in the center of the pentagram. Her stomach gurgled furiously. She was about to bare her naked ass when she realized this position felt awkward. She fumbled a bit before settling on getting down on her knees. She lifted up her skirt and directed her naked bum towards one of the candles, like a cannon ready to fire. She hesitated for a brief second, contemplating how ridiculous this was. She also felt her cheeks turn red hot; it would be incredibly embarrassing if anyone were to walk in right now on her.

Another painful swell in her belly reminded her to just get on with it. She wasn’t going to stuff herself with dairy and dried fruit for nothing. If this was a load of bullshit, then so be it. She would scrub the pentagram off with a quick rinse of isopropyl alcohol and snuff out all the candles.

Brenna sighed, leaned forward, and ripped ass.

She snuffed out the first candle with a long BBBRRRRRBBBBP! The force of it surprised her. Yes, she knew she was lactose intolerant, but she had never before purposely stuffed herself with ice cream in order to create unruly gaseous effects. The fart was so damn big that her asshole nearly hurt. Yet, there was a hint of relief in her belly now.

Onto the next candle.

PPPPPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP!

And the next.

PRRRRRRRUUUUMMPPPPP!

And the next.

PFFFFFFHHHHHHHHTTTTTTTTTTT! (That was a softer one)

And the last.

BBBBFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!

She let it all out on the last one, ending with a loud grunt that made her realize too late that her voice carried. She clasped her mouth and her heart pounded wondering if anyone heard her. A final squeaky fart escaped her.

Silence.

Thunder boomed.

Every hair on her body stood still, waiting for anything to happen. How would the demon arrive anyway? A puff of smoke? A knock on the door? Maybe they were right behind her…lurking in the darkened halls.

After about ten minutes of nothing, Brenna sighed heavily and put her hands on her face in shame. Embarrassment, really. It suddenly hit her that she went through all this just to make sure she went through grad school. She was a fucking moron. She was supposed to be a scientist, not a New Age guru.

She started to lose it and chuckled to herself.

“Goddammit, Brenna. The shit you will do to get by in life.”

Desperation was something she was used to but hated admitting. Barely able to scrape by with rent, she hated asking for help but would quietly accept it if a friend noticed and offered something. She would be dumb to refuse.

This was, by far, the most ridiculous thing she had ever done.

At last, she gathered the candles and took out a cloth to start wiping down the pentagram. That was when an intense brush of heat made her recoil before she could rub the chalk. She yelped and fell backwards.

The pentagram sizzled.

She clutched her hand to her chest and stared, breathing faster. A scent of brimstone and coal started to permeate the room. The sizzling grew louder. The red chalk started to waver and flicker like embers in a fireplace.

Brenna held her breath and backed away towards the door. She wasn’t ready for this. This wasn’t supposed to work. Then why did she even try in the first place? She didn’t think it would actually work! Now there was a demon - a real live demon - appearing before her in Mason Hall!

A small window slit opened through reality above the pentagram. Brenna squinted, catching glimpses of reddish hills and cavernous valleys.  The demon slowly emerged hand-first from the portal, as if testing his surroundings. The red hand moved around and felt the air. When it touched the ground, the demon made a noise like a grunt and then toppled over the portal onto the floor.

The portal closed and the sizzling stopped. A low hiss of smoke rose from the demon’s two horns.

He looked more or less like the image in the book, although thankfully he was fully clothed. Brenna was surprised to see that his clothes were oddly…human. He could have been mistaken for a 1930’s reporter, with a pinstripe dress shirt with a black tie and suspenders with brown slacks. He had his sleeves rolled up, revealing thick forearms. He also had quite a nice pair of loafers on. His eyes were hidden behind thick black sunglasses. His hair tousled, he combed it for a couple seconds with a comb from his pocket.

The demon coughed a little bit, then sniffed the air.

When he finally noticed Brenna, he said, in a deep somewhat throaty voice, “Hey.”