ALLCAPS COOKBOOK PRESENTS: FALAFFLES! (Patreon)

Did I invent this?

I mean, I was going to say I didn't, but looking over the falafel waffles online I don't really see anyone doing the full-shawarma-in-one thing I did here, so maybe I did.

If so, I'm a genius because this was SO GOOD. Every plate was fully cleaned. Absolutely delicious. 

Now, many people on the unstable microblogging platforms of your choice scoffed and said I should have put the meat and tabouli on top instead of baked in, and to that I say: I see you do not have a toddler who you have to trick into eating things by making them waffle-shaped. In no way shape or form would Bastian tolerate piling things on top of other things, that is not structurally sound.

Also, I really liked that every bite had every element evenly dispersed through it rather than scooting my fork around to make sure my bites were assembled every time. The texture differences were great. I don't think I WILL stack things on it, I did this on purpose and I'M NOT SORRY.

You won't be, either.

A couple of notes: I just used falafel mix from a box. If you want to make it from scratch, more power to you, but I am swamped with work and the child and I do not have that kind of time. Likewise, I used tabouli salad from the grocery store and frozen shawarma meat from the "international" aisle because I'm tired. If you have leftover shawarma or make it yourself that would undoubtedly be even better, likewise the salad. Gyro or kebab meat also a great choice. Look, I'm not making toum at home either, it's hot and I don't like peeling garlic so much I need to make it a fourth job. I'll make artisanal versions of this sort of thing in the winter but in the summer I can't be asked, it's too hot, too rainy (the fuck, Maine), the kid too antsy, the workday not long enough. NO JUDGMENT ON PRE-MIXES AROUND HERE WE ARE GARBAGETOWNERS FREE AND CLEAR so it's fine, you are valid and accepted.

Finally, as written, this recipe makes FOUR. Four thicc waffles and that's IT. I recommend doubling if you have more than yourself to feed or want leftovers, because we'd all have had more if it made more.

Ingredients

1 box storebought falafel mix (if there's two packets in there, use both)

1 1/4 cup tabouli salad

1/2 cup diced cooked shawarma meat per waffle (remember, one box of falafel mix makes four waffles)

3 tablespoons olive oil

Salt and pepper to taste

A waffle iron

Toppings (all optional depending on your preferences, serve in bowls buffet-style)

Lemon garlic hummus 

Tahini

Toum or garlic aioli

Pomegranate molasses

Sriracha would be nice if you have a spare kidney to sell for it

LEMME SEE YOU WAFFLE IT, JUST A LITTLE BIT

This couldn't be much easier.

Prepare the falafel mix in a large bowl according to package instructions, then add two tablespoons of the olive oil and salt and pepper. Set aside for at least half an hour but up to two hours. It doesn't look like much right away but the batter will grow in volume.

When you're ready to start cooking, add the meat and salad and stir until evenly combined. Heat your waffle iron to high, brush some of the remaining olive oil on the surface with a pastry brush, then scoop a half cup measure of batter onto the middle of the iron. These will take longer than a regular waffle as they're much denser, but won't expand as much as they have no rising agent. I would expect a minimum of five to seven full actual human minutes per waffle depending on your iron. They should be dark brown and crispy all over. A little soft filling on the very edges is fine, but you really want this cooked all the way through.

Serve with cute little bowls of all the toppings you like on your shawarma so people can drizzle them on at will. Accept the wonder and awe of your loved ones and claim to have invented it.