ALLCAPS COOKBOOK: Cumin Lamb Tacos with Roasted Sweet-Spicy Carrots and Pistachios (Patreon)

Cumin Lamb Tacos with Roasted Sweet-Spicy Carrots and Pistachios

HELLO EVERYBODY!

I do not have diabetes anymore OMG EFF YES! I am not pregnant anymore and thus do not have the weight of creating an entire human weighing down my necessary brain-parts and also agitating my stomachparts and making me not want to cook anything at all! DOBBY IS A FREE ELF!

I mean, not free at all, really, I have a Small Creature who needs me literally all the time and has just developed enough cognitive capacity to actually KNOW when I start to do something not related to him and instantly squawk and cry to be held. HENCE MY TARDINESS WHICH YOU HAVE ALL SO NICELY FORGIVEN TRUST ME THIS FOOD WILL GO SOME WAY TOWARD SOOTHING THINGS BETWEEN US.

I have cooked SO MUCH MORE since I had the baby. Suddenly my ability to complete multi-stage tasks is returning. And I woke up with a desire to invent something awesome the other day. I didn’t get this recipe from anywhere, I just made it up in my own good head and it is THE BIZNESS. Hold onto your damn hats, I’m about to MAKE IT ALL HAPPEN FOR YOU.

It’s sweet, it’s spicy, it’s meaty, it’s toothsome, you could make a big batch or a small one, it doesn’t even really matter, it’s gonna be great. PLUS IT HAS VEGETABLES WHICH I HEAR ARE GOOD FOR YOU OR SOMETHING. 

If I did it again I might drizzle some tahini and sprinkle sesame seeds on top for a bit more fusion flair, and I totally THOUGHT I had tahini in the house, but I didn’t, because my mental catalogue of what there is up in here is nine months stale. We DID have sesame seeds…but they had achieved sentience, and that sentience was green and angry. NO HULK SEEDS.

ANYHOO. LET’S DO THIS.

Ingredients

1 pack Small/fajita-size tortillas

1 package lamb stew meat, cut into julienne-type strips

4 large carrots, peeled and cut into small irregular chunks (ie, cut into rounds, and then very sloppily into quarters, it doesn’t have to be exact, no one cares, just chunky yet funky)

1/3 cup fresh parsley, chopped fine

1 1/2 tblsp flour

1 1/2 tblsp cumin

1 tsp ras el-hanout

1-2 tsp cayenne or more (you know I always look out for you guys—increase for awesome spicewow, decrease for less, either way, half goes in the lamb, half on the carrots)

1/2 tsp garlic powder

1 1/2-2 tblsp brown sugar

1 large lemon

2 large spoonfuls or more of toum (WHAT IS TOUM YOU SAY. It is the delicious garlic sauce what comes on shawarma. Now, this is hard to find online, easier in middle eastern markets, kind of time consuming to make at home. I used Teta Foods Garlic Spread, which is the right taste but a more mayo-like consistency, then squeezed a generous wedge of lemon into it and whisked it till it was thin enough to conceivably drizzle. It was perfect.)

Garnishes (Any combination you care to try of the following OR ALL OF THEM GO FOR GOLD COMMIT TO EXCELLENCE)

Crushed pistachios (How many? HOW MANY YOU GOT?)

Drizzle of pomegranate molasses (yes it is the greatest, yes you have to buy it in a middle eastern store or order from Amazon, no I’m not sorry)

Drizzle tahini

Crumbled feta cheese

Drizzle honey or hot sauce or BOTH

Sesame seeds

Caramelized onions (once again, husband is allergic, I CANNOT HAS EVER BUT YOU SHOULD. EAT THEM FOR ME.)

ACTIONFOOD

Put all your nicely chunked-up carrots in a large bowl, toss with olive oil, 1/2 tblsp cumin, half the cayenne, garlic powder, brown sugar, salt and pepper to taste. Spread chunks evenly on a foil-lined baking sheet and bake at 375 for 20-25 minutes, checking to make sure they don’t burn and turning at least once during the bake so that the corners crisp up nice and brown. Keep the bowl handy, don’t wash it out yet.

While the carrots cook:

Put all your nicely sliced up lamb in a large bowl, add flour, 1 tblsp cumin, the ras el-hanout (again I send you to the specialty market, sorry not sorry, just add a bit of cinnamon and garlic powder if you don’t have any) salt and pepper, mix until all the meat is coated.

Heat olive oil and a splash of sesame oil in a large pan until shimmering. Fry lamb quickly, just until it browns on both sides, leaving the insides a bit pink. Remove, set to one side.

When carrots are done, put them back into their original bowl and toss with the parsley and the juice of the lemon, adding a drizzle (SO MUCH DRIZZLE IN THIS BUT I’M NOT GONNA SNOOP DOGG IT I’M BETTER THAN THAT OK NOT REALLY DRIZZLE FO SHIZZLE) of honey and adjusting salt and pepper to taste. 

TACOS ASSEMBLE. Heat tortillas or don’t depending on your taste. A little structure might be nice, and if you toast your tortillas a bit before hand that will provide. Lamb goes in first, then carrot mixture, then whatever combination of garnishes you have on hand. Serve hot. Thank me later.